Lori Alexander 61: Harridan MIL

[AlwaysDiscerning]

and another thought--she constantly says "all I ever wanted to be was a wife and a mom". Doesn't that imply that want those thing you  have to love them? You love children to want to be a mom!

[older than allosaurs]

12 hours ago, SuperNova said:

Lori:  "And no, mothers don’t just naturally love their children or else God wouldn’t have told older women to teach the young women to love their children."

Love is a chemical reaction. Mammals release oxytocin after giving birth, when hearing their baby cry, and when nursing. No one teaches animals to love their babies. There's no older godly cat teaching younger cats to love their litter. In case Lori wasn't aware, most humans (Lori is a lizard person) are mammals and don't need to learn to love their offspring.

Well, you aren't necessarily a cold monster if you don't feel that immediate outpouring of love for your new child. I know that some people don't, at least not right away. And sometimes circumstances conspire -- with adopted children and stepchildren, you may need to fall in love over time by practicing love as an action.

With my first child, whom I met as an infant, I was a goner from the moment I held her in my arms. With the second, who was a toddler, what I felt was committed. I was determined to do right by her. I didn't have that emotional outpouring of immediate love, and she didn't think much of me, but I took a leap of faith that it would come. Today is her 32nd birthday, we've already talked twice on the phone, and I love her to the moon and back. Sometimes, still, I comb out and braid her hair, and I still feel those physical waves of love and connection that came to us over time. Somehow we managed this without Godly older woman input.

 

 

 

 

[Lgirlrocks]

Spoiler

It’s so sad how uneducated some people are. How much research does lori do for her blogs again? @Ken isn’t it six hours a day?

[delphinium65]

2 hours ago, Lgirlrocks said:

It's so sad how uneducated some people are. How much research does lori do for her blogs again? @Ken isn’t it six hours a day?

Six hours?  More like six minutes.  The other 5:54 would be scolding and deleting. 

[Mar]

 

2 hours ago, Lgirlrocks said:

 

  Hide contents

 

Being against abortion and against birth control at the same time is so stupid it hurts my head! 

[Lgirlrocks]

24 minutes ago, Mar said:

 

Being against abortion and against birth control at the same time is so stupid it hurts my head! 

Well DR. Lori said birth control causes abortions and abortions are bad. 

[Sarah92]

My question is, if all she ever wanted to be was a wife and mother why was she such an awful person to Ken? And her children but she specifically mentions being a bad wife, she doesn't seem to view her mothering in that way. If someone wants to be something they take it upon themselves to learn about it and become better at it why did it take her so long to be a "better" wife? Why was she using birth control when all she wanted was to be a mother? I find her saying that she learned nothing in college to be ridiculous as well. Even in classes I had no desire to be in I still learned something. She was surely being taught teaching skills or something. The fact that she learned nothing doesn't reflect on the school but on her character. All of this reflects on her character. Despite being a "Christian" she couldn't even bother to practice the command of "love others" towards Ken or follow the Fruits of the Spirit. She refused to learn despite it being paid for my her parents and being given a wonderful learning opportunity she could have used with homeschooling her children. 

I call bullshit on her entire life narrative. 

 

[Granwych]

On 1/22/2019 at 9:49 AM, delphinium65 said:

Today she's bragging about the 'free' shit she gets just for being Ken's wife.  'If you think that women don’t benefit from taking care of their family and being a help meet to their husbands, I will tell you. I get free rent. I get free food. I get free internet and TV. I get free heat. I get a free car. I even get spending money.'  Sounds like a lazy welfare queen to me. 

(just for the record I'm not saying, or implying, that people who get welfare are lazy, or trying to milk the system for all they can get. I've spent too much of my life in the lower end of the financial system to think that!  That's more the stereotype that Lori would believe, which makes her boasting even more silly) 

Nothing free there.  That's her compensation for "10 minutes and some lube."

 Lori is what some might call a kept woman.  That's being nice; others might call her a ho.

[Briefly]

Lori is such a hypocrite.  She is so against birth control.  Yet she is on record as saying that she used a diaphragm.  Which is birth control, after all.  And, by her rules, wouldn't it be worse than the pill?  The pill prevents an egg from being released.  A diaphragm prevents the sperm from meeting an already released egg.  I mean, if we are going to follow her logic, then wouldn't an already released egg be considered a pre-embryo or something like that?  She really is an idiot.

It is not lost on me, and probably not anybody else either, that she did not decide to leave her fertility/family size up to God until she was pretty much at the end of her childbearing years.  But of course it was ok for her to do that...

There were times that I was on the pill, even with the difficulty we had conceiving.  I had really bad periods and my doctor put me on it when I was a teenager then I was on it at various times over the years because of that. My periods were regular, but they were bad and in hindsight I may have had endometriosis.  Which my mother probably had never heard of, or she would have asked the doctor about that when she took me in because my periods were so bad.

[Hisey]

I've been reading DIL Emily's Beautycounter FB page. It's interesting because Emily does videos  hawking the products. These videos are watched by Lori, Emily even says hi to her once. There's also a post by Lori on that page, thanking Emily for some lipstick. 

Emily clearly puts a lot of time into selling BeautyCounter products. Why is this OK? Why does Lori approve, watch her videos, purchase her products? Why isn't Emily caring for her family?

BC is pricey.  I've seen high-end stuff, but BeautyCounter pushes the envelope for me. In one video, Emily promotes a group of products that allow you to make up your face in the morning very quickly. Best of all, she says, they only come to about $180! This impresses her. She says something like, "See, you can have a five-minute face for only $180" 

Google Beautycounter by Emily Alexander if you want to see the page. I couldn't get the link to imbed here.

[cindyluvs24]

On 1/25/2019 at 5:25 PM, lilwriter85 said:

lol. I wonder if Lori would have been happy if she had lived during those past time periods when men played women in theater plays. 

 

 Lori would be horrified at the large codpieces.

[Koala]

$180 ? I am a southerner, and you know how women in the south can be about make-up.  I can easily decorate my entire face for under $25.  I would laugh myself all the way to the CoverGirl aisle if some old hag (claiming to be frugal, no less) tried to sell me on nearly $200 worth of face paint.  No thanks.

ps- I'd be careful about holding Lori up as an example of what BC can do.  That's just me, though...

[cindyluvs24]

5 hours ago, AlwaysDiscerning said:

and another thought--she constantly says "all I ever wanted to be was a wife and a mom". Doesn't that imply that want those thing you  have to love them? You love children to want to be a mom!

I think, over time, everything else she tried didn't work out for her.  She "chose" her current life because it was a last resort for a gal who couldn't hack anything else so she sabotaged her diaphragm and got to stay home.   Luckily, she was married to a guy who was willing to put up with that AND earned enough to make it all work AND lives in a community property state where its cheaper to keep her.

[Red Hair, Black Dress]

BC for a quickie face at $180!!! Oh dear Lord. that's outrageous, verging on obscene.  Even if you buy something high end, like Bobbi Brown, you can come in way under $180. Cover Girl, Maybelline, L'Oreal, Revlon, bought 'em all since high school.  Still do.  I'm a sucker for CG and L'Oreal mascara.

[wallysmommy]

I wouldn’t buy any product she recommends.  She’s a terrible testimonial for any product — beauty, hair, medical, dog food, or even alligator bait.

[Sarah92]

25 minutes ago, Red Hair, Black Dress said:

BC for a quickie face at $180!!! Oh dear Lord. that's outrageous, verging on obscene.  Even if you buy something high end, like Bobbi Brown, you can come in way under $180. Cover Girl, Maybelline, L'Oreal, Revlon, bought 'em all since high school.  Still do.  I'm a sucker for CG and L'Oreal mascara.

Yeah I did a quick run through of more natural make up brands and the pricing is all within the same range but I'd say but it's all still pretty pricey. Although I did notice BC's lipstick was more expensive than some of bobbi brown's which I think is already expensive. It's pretty unattainable for the average women struggling to pay the bills. That type of makeup is stuff you'd have to set a side money for. I guess that makes me sad? This makeup is supposed to be better for you but the expense keeps many people from buying it. It's similar to organic foods. To put into perspective, last night I bought like 7 makeup items from Colourpop for $39, just a little bit more than the price of BC's lipstick. Why would I buy from Beautycounter then? 

I want to specify, there is nothing wrong with having more expensive makeup. I have bought more expensive things just because I wanted them. I find a problem with pretending that something is cheap or a good deal when it's not. $150 for a five min. face is not the average women's budget. 

[Frog99]

1 hour ago, Hisey said:

BC is pricey.  I've seen high-end stuff, but BeautyCounter pushes the envelope for me. In one video, Emily promotes a group of products that allow you to make up your face in the morning very quickly. Best of all, she says, they only come to about $180! This impresses her. She says something like, "See, you can have a five-minute face for only $180" 

I’m not a fan of any of the MLM makeup companies, but I have a particular aversion to BC. They market themselves as “safer beauty” and advocate for legislative changes (I have no issue with that) but their focus is solely on women with indispensable income. If safe skincare and makeup are as important as they say, it should be accessible to a greater number of women. To me, it’s a “Let them eat cake” mentality and it pisses me off. 

[ViolaSebastian]

I was getting so confused because we were using BC to mean both Beauty Counter and birth control. 

Lori's stance is that hormonal birth control was the gateway to abortion. Of course that's patently ridiculous and false--abortion is as old as time--as is birth control. The difference, of course, is the medicalization and legality of abortion. And as for birth control, Lori herself infamously used a diaphragm. Does she think those were invented in the 70s? Yeesh. 

She'd do best just to butt the hell out of other people's business.

[SilverBeach]

3 hours ago, Sarah92 said:

My question is, if all she ever wanted to be was a wife and mother why was she such an awful person to Ken?

For twenty fucking years no less! Lori Alexander changed her tune because Ken was fed up and was going to divorce her ass. She should win an Oscar for acting like a submissive wife, there is not a submissive bone in her selfish body. Lori Alexander reeks of insincerity with her phony submission and phony "godliness".

[usmcmom]

7 hours ago, AlwaysDiscerning said:

If loving your children doesn't come naturally, who taught Lori to love hers? Of course I realize she probably still doesn't, but in seriousness....was it Debi Pearl? If so that means she didn't love them at all in their youth. 

This has been my thought since the first time Lori ever wrote that nonsense. 

Her children were all in their teens or twenties when she discovered Devi Pearl, right?  Of course she is too dumb to realize the confession she's actually making with these words. She forgets that we are all much smarter than she is and we can put it together.  

 

[PennySycamore]

@ViolaSebastian,  yeah, diaphragms have been around for awhile.  I remember well when my mom said to my sister and me who were both using diaphragms after we had babies within 2 week of each other "They don't work if you leave them in the dresser drawer".   And apparently she was speaking from experience.  Not only were us four kids born within 4 years and 3 months, our aunt told my sister and me at our last family reunion that our grandmother would get pretty frustrated by mom's not using her diaphagm!  My grandmother had 10 kids, but they were spread out over 20 years or so.   I don't think she wanted her daughters to repeat her experience.  

Also there is that scene from Downton Abbey here Lady Mary Crawley asks her maid Anna (who is married) to get a diaphragm at the chemist's shop and gives her a book by Marie Stopes containing a drawing of what she needs.  Lady Mary is about to go away with Lord Gillingham for the week and wants to not get pregnant.

ETA:  I should add that my parents were having kids in the 50s and my sister and I both gave birth in 1980.  The DA scene was set in the mid-20s.

[EowynW]

My grandma used a diaphragm to space out her 5 kids. Lori prolly wouldn't approve of one now since they need to be paired with spermicide and Lori is anti spermicide. 

[Liza]

5 hours ago, cindyluvs24 said:

I think, over time, everything else she tried didn't work out for her.  She "chose" her current life because it was a last resort for a gal who couldn't hack anything else so she sabotaged her diaphragm and got to stay home.   Luckily, she was married to a guy who was willing to put up with that AND earned enough to make it all work AND lives in a community property state where its cheaper to keep her.

BINGO!

[klein_roeschen]

@PennySycamore the honourable Miss Phryne Fisher of Miss Fisher's Murder Mysteries uses also one in the late 1920's, she even catched a poisonous spider with it.

5 minutes of time and the very basics in google- fu brought me the history of the diaphragm and that it neither is something new nor modern by our standarts:
The diaphragm was invented in the 1870's by the the dutch- german physician Dr. Wilhelm Mensinga. After opening his practice in the mid 1860's in Flensburg, he offered a free clinic twice a week for poor people. His initial goal was to battle tuberculosis, his first wife, whom he loved dearly died of tuberculosis in 1870. That put him into a deep crisis and he tought about becoming a pastor like his father. But his second wife, his first wife's half sister he married in 1871, encurages him to continue practising as a physician and became a lifelong supporter of his work. He also changed his focus away from tuberculosis. He saw the devastating health effects of near constant pregnancies in esp poor women with children they couldn't affort and wanted to do something against it. With the help of the local instrument maker Friedrichsen he invented the first diaphragm. He let produce different sizes and always did himself the first adjustments for the female patient. He also gave her a detailed written instruction for the use. He even invented a helper for inserting the diaphragm. After monitoring 12 women for years about the health benefits of the diaphragm, he published in 1882 his paper about the diaphragm and it's benefits first under a pseudonym, but later under his real name not only for his fellow physicians but for everyone to read. He was widely critized by many fellow physicians and even had to face some repercutions, but he stood strong on that topic. Because on the other side, there where also many physicians who approved of his paper and he became many thank you letters from women, enough to let him continue his work. With the turn of the century, his diaphragm was used internationally and his work and invention where recognised among experts and in medical schools. His diaphragm was also used until the 1950's, as newer and better models where invented.

[Katzchen24]

25 minutes ago, klein_roeschen said:

@PennySycamore the honourable Miss Phryne Fisher of Miss Fisher's Murder Mysteries uses also one in the late 1920's, she even catched a poisonous spider with it.

 

You had me at Miss Phryne Fisher!