Maxwell 23: Backyard Breeding

[jegfile]

This is probably going to be very BEC of me but I just found out that while my brother and his son were cleaning out his mother-in-law's house, Nephew found some water guns. He started playing with them. Some nosy idiot on the sitting out on his/her balcony called the cops and when my brother went outside the front door to put the garbage out, there was the swat team. They restrained my brother (not with handcuffs thank God) and when Nephew came out the front, thank Rufus he wasn't carrying on of those toys. Swat searched the house and found no guns of course but my brother is completely freaked out and really needs some help cleaning the house out so they can sell it and get away from the crazy neighbours.

So Sarah, your mother sounds fine I guess but my parents (76 and 74) are flying to help my brother, sister-in-law niece and nephew clean out MIL's house. This is not going to be easy but they are committed. In the last ten years they have dealt with both of their mothers' stuff, my aunt's estate and apartment and had to come and clean out mine for me when I was too sick to move. They are active, completely unselfish with their money and yet have also prepaid their funerals and have a will all set to go.

Your mother may have put 30 years into homeschooling (but the math doesn't really work out unless Mary spent 3 years in 12th grade just so her mother could claim 30). My parents were evil public school teachers who have reconnected with lots of their old students on social media and let me just say that those students do more than paint children's faces at fairs and go on undisclosed mission trips. When I was a few weeks away from getting my Masters, I had an evil group essay to do as my last assignment and my classmates were useless. It was my mother who stayed up late every day for a week and helped me turn my partners' crap into a graduate-level assignment. Me and my mother deserved the A not the 4 lazy asses who were assigned to me.

Now my parents are not perfect... They do their walks in the morning separately. My father likes to walk around the block a million times and my mother likes to wander around and meet dogs and mail letters etc. They can do errands by themselves and hang out with their own friends. Makes their life richer and gives them something to talk about over dinner. I'll let them know that they should be praying outloud on their walks. My father is largely deaf but I'm sure he won't mind walking backwards so he can read my mother's lips. Wouldn't want to repeat themselves.

 

 

[SPHASH]

Well that was another barf inducing post.  Most spouses are best friends to each other, duh!

 

[nelliebelle1197]

6 hours ago, fundieundies said:

Agreed with everything you said - although I do think Steve might marry off Mary because it would look bad if none of his daughters married. It's 150% too late for Sarah, it's 60%  too late for Anna but I think Mary's got a shot. Although maybe like 1% because whatever poor soul gets called on by God to join the Maxwells in rebuking Pepsi will have to live either in Steve's home or nearby and be willing to take on whatever businesses Steve is involved in

I don't think it is too late for Anna by a long shot. The Maxwells don't marry as young as others. All the boys have been well into their 20s. They seem to be marrying in birth order, so Anna is actually next if that trend continues.

1 hour ago, jegfile said:

Your mother may have put 30 years into homeschooling (but the math doesn't really work out unless Mary spent 3 years in 12th grade just so her mother could claim 30).

 

Um, actually I think she did spend two years in 12th grade so Teri could claim 30 years. Does anyone else remember this?

[ophelia]

Quote

Mom is our master planner, remembering even the smallest details.

So why do they need schedules and excel lists for even the smallest events in their lifes?

[johnhugh]

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Please take a moment and make Mom’s day extra special by leaving her comment. As a bonus, we’d love to hear a sentence or two on how she’s impacted your life!

Oh dear, Terri seems to get the least amount  of birthday comments if Sarah is asking for them.

Im sure we could all leave a sentance or two on how she has impacted our lives, not that it will get approved. Hi Stevie!

 

[Palimpsest]

26 minutes ago, nelliebelle1197 said:

Um, actually I think she did spend two years in 12th grade so Teri could claim 30 years. Does anyone else remember this?

She did.  Mary graduated in March 2015.  Sarah had claimed Mary was well ahead and almost ready to graduate early (like Anna) about 18 months earlier.  Then Mary was set the task to summarize the whole Bible and that took her months and months - until Teri could say she homeschooled for 30 years.

That said, I wish you hadn't asked because I had to go and check. 

The Maxwells don't get to be high school graduates until they are 18, even Anna (born October 31, 1992).

Quote

 

ANNA’S GRADUATION

This was posted on December 11, 2010 by Steve.

It was with great joy that our family gathered together for the sixth of our homeschool graduations last Saturday evening. This one was for Anna, who was our first child to graduate early. She has worked hard on her school requirements, and she was able to complete them several months before her normal graduation time, which would have been next May.

 

But they like to blur the dates:  

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Our family celebrated Joseph’s high school graduation Saturday night. Even though Joseph has officially been done with school for several months, with trips and the house building project, we hadn’t been able to celebrate his graduation yet.

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John’s graduation day finally arrived. Because of his investment working on our house and bus, John wasn’t able to finish his graduation requirements until we were on our last trip in September and October. He then turned these in to Steve, who needed to find time to go over them. The rest of the family was very anxious for John’s graduation. Last Sunday, Steve said John had completed his work, and we all voted to have the graduation right away.

Quote

Friday evening, we celebrated the graduation of Jesse Maxwell. Jesse is the 7th Maxwell to graduate from our homeschool. Jesse worked hard at his school: he was diligent, he applied himself to his studies, and he excelled quickly.

Oh, Rufus.  Poor Jesse is so boring that is all Sarah can find to say about him.  

Quote

Our graduation celebration started with dinner, and Jesse chose the menu: ham stew, cornbread, potato casserole, and for dessert: chocolate brownies with fudge sauce, and chocolate custard.

Except that he likes ham stew (whatever that is) and has a sweet tooth.  I note no veggies in his graduation meal.

[LurkerOverThePond]

"Mom is our master planner, remembering even the smallest details."

...except the most important thing when you are traveling out of the country: the passports.

[IReallyAmHopewell]

45 minutes ago, Palimpsest said:

She did.  Mary graduated in March 2015.  Sarah had claimed Mary was well ahead and almost ready to graduate early (like Anna) about 18 months earlier.  Then Mary was set the task to summarize the whole Bible and that took her months and months - until Teri could say she homeschooled for 30 years.

I won't say it really was so she could claim 30 years but I've noticed a lot of "Well, we thought Ruth Grace Faith Helpmeet-Girl was mature enough to do X, but ...no...we'll just have to wait and let the Lord work on her heart." Driving is a big one for this.  I wonder if this isn't part of Mary's punishment. That or perhaps she had worldly thoughts she dared speak aloud like "I wish I could wear shorts just  once, inside the house when the boys aren't home, so I'd know how it feels." Or, "Could I taste Dr. Pepper for my birthday?" Yeah.

TODAY'S POST:

She is the best Grandma book-reader,  Is this a quote from one of the little guys?

GIRLS MARRYING:

Jesus First, Others Second, Yourself Last. Right now (and forever) Dad/Mom need you to do the work and be the nannies so your brothers can breed Army's for God. Prince Charming is a worldly idea. Falling in love is a worldly idea. I could see Steve asking his girls who they want in a husband and then finding one the exact opposite so they must "obey" to get married--die to their fleshly-desires and accept Dad's choice or stay single and never be allowed to pluck your eyebrows. That said, I imagine ONE will marry. If he can find a guy who has less fun than the Maxwells so that living in a re-modeled 60s bi-level and eating 1 bean burrito per night is seen as a good thing.

 

[socalrules]

It’s interesting to see Sarah say that Teri’s 30 years of teaching was free. She neglected to mention it seems to have cost Teri her mental health for the years she was dealing with depression and trying to homeschool eleventy kids. It’s not like they haven’t posted a million times about what Teri  was going though during that time. 

[nomoxian]

12 hours ago, fundieundies said:

Agreed with everything you said - although I do think Steve might marry off Mary because it would look bad if none of his daughters married. It's 150% too late for Sarah, it's 60%  too late for Anna but I think Mary's got a shot. Although maybe like 1% because whatever poor soul gets called on by God to join the Maxwells in rebuking Pepsi will have to live either in Steve's home or nearby and be willing to take on whatever businesses Steve is involved in

I'm not sure whether it would be easier to manipulate a young guy into moving to Steveville or finding an older widowed man, maybe with a couple kids who still need taking care of. I think in the latter case, he would be more willing to move to 'start afresh' or Steve might be willing to let his oldest Leave and Cleave.

[anjulibai]

I truly don't think any of the "girls" will marry. Anna and Mary are too immature and child-like to deal with marriage, and Sarah is probably too afraid at this point. Plus, Steve doesn't want to give up that control or their free labor. 

[Foudeb]

I have some hope for Anna or Mary. We don't know what the gummy smiles and matchy outfits hide. They may be dissatisfied with the prospect of ending like Sarah. And who knows, maybe one of their SILs can introduce them to a compatible fundie bachelor. They're still very young. 

Sarah on the other hand is terrified of the world. I don't think she wants to marry. The perfect godly suitor with debt free house and perfectly chiselled body under the required beige slacks and checkered shirt could show up at her doorstep with a ring and bunch of flowers for a no touch courtship chaperoned by Steve and she'd hide behind her Bible until she can summon the courage to say that god put it on her heart to stay a virgin in a single bed until the rapture. 

[fundieundies]

4 hours ago, nomoxian said:

I'm not sure whether it would be easier to manipulate a young guy into moving to Steveville or finding an older widowed man, maybe with a couple kids who still need taking care of. I think in the latter case, he would be more willing to move to 'start afresh' or Steve might be willing to let his oldest Leave and Cleave.

Ooo I never thought of this as a possibility, but now that you've brought it up I can see it. Perhaps a widow with a few children or older man who has nothing stopping him from living right under Steve (i.e. parents, a thriving business). Now that I see this, there's definitely options for them but I think now it's just a matter of Steve's willingness to let go 

[Lisafer]

Maybe I look at this differently because I grew up fundie, but I honestly think the unmarried Maxwell women still have a shot at marriage (if they want to get married, which I'm not convinced Sarah does). They're human, after all. If the right man comes along, those hearts may start fluttering (although we won't be able to tell, what with the double-layered t-shirts). Love and/or lust might weaken Steve's control just enough for his daughters to move down the street with a handsome Jesus-follower who has real meat in his burrito.

[JermajestyDuggar]

My guess is that Anna will marry first. But I have no clue who the guy will be. Steve has so many rules it’s hard to imagine any of the fundies living up to his ridiculous standards. 

[Tatar-tot]

Not only her mental health but the financial lost to the family because Steve had to quit his job to take up the slack due to Teri not getting mental health treatment.  There is also the loss financially of Teri not holding a full time job.  I figured their lifestyle cost them between $1-$2 million dollars.  Steve is an engineer and could have easily been making between 100-200k for the past 15 years.  

This family is really a bunch big idiots on so many levels. 

[Lgirlrocks]

I don’t like how fundies say their parents made so many sacrifices to home school them. I’m not saying some parent who home school dont make sacrifices but it seems most of them don’t. My mom didn’t. She wouldn’t have worked during the week. We still would have helped out around the house. My mom didn’t put a lot of effort into mine or my younger brothers education. She spent a lot of time on my older brother. 

Good parents make some sort of sacrifice just being a parent. Terri isn’t special because she home schooled. She stayed at home while her kids were in school. 

[JermajestyDuggar]

9 minutes ago, Lgirlrocks said:

I don’t like how fundies say their parents made so many sacrifices to home school them. I’m not saying some parent who home school dont make sacrifices but it seems most of them don’t. My mom didn’t. She wouldn’t have worked during the week. We still would have helped out around the house. My mom didn’t put a lot of effort into mine or my younger brothers education. She spent a lot of time on my older brother. 

Good parents make some sort of sacrifice just being a parent. Terri isn’t special because she home schooled. She stayed at home while her kids were in school. 

I’ve always taken it as a sacrifice because Teri didn’t want to homeschool them. I don’t think Teri enjoyed it at all. I don’t think she wanted that many children. I’m not saying “ oh poor Teri let’s feel sorry for her” because it was actually her choice. However it seems to me she basically worked a job she hated for 30 years. Like so many others. 

[Lisafer]

11 minutes ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

I’ve always taken it as a sacrifice because Teri didn’t want to homeschool them. I don’t think Teri enjoyed it at all. I don’t think she wanted that many children. I’m not saying “ oh poor Teri let’s feel sorry for her” because it was actually her choice. However it seems to me she basically worked a job she hated for 30 years. Like so many others. 

I think you're right. Some people are perpetual martyrs. I mean, Teri martyred herself over Pepsi, for crying out loud. 

[Granwych]

15 hours ago, LurkerOverThePond said:

"Mom is our master planner, remembering even the smallest details."

...except the most important thing when you are traveling out of the country: the passports.

Sarah,  remember how your mom forgot to take the paper off the damn cheese?

Maybe that detail wasn't small enough for Terrified to remember.

[Anonymousguest]

11 hours ago, socalrules said:

It’s interesting to see Sarah say that Teri’s 30 years of teaching was free. She neglected to mention it seems to have cost Teri her mental health for the years she was dealing with depression and trying to homeschool eleventy kids. It’s not like they haven’t posted a million times about what Teri  was going though during that time. 

Because it's written in Sarah's typical stilted style, it's a little confusing, but I think what she meant was that she worked an entire career of teaching for no pay. Not that there was no personal cost to Terri or the family at large. 

[Lgirlrocks]

Terri has more birthday wishes on the blog than Steve had. 

[purjolok84]

Looking at twitter again I see I missed that Joseph went to Orlando and NYC late last year too.  I also see the tweet mentioned above about wanting music at a reasonable volume to facilitate networking.  If they are in the same room as loud sinful music is ok with Stevie?  Or do they have special music filters in their ears?

Those 'special music filters' sound very Black Mirror-ish ... [emoji38]

[FloraDoraDolly]

On 8/17/2018 at 7:27 PM, JermajestyDuggar said:

I’ve always taken it as a sacrifice because Teri didn’t want to homeschool them. I don’t think Teri enjoyed it at all. I don’t think she wanted that many children. I’m not saying “ oh poor Teri let’s feel sorry for her” because it was actually her choice. However it seems to me she basically worked a job she hated for 30 years. Like so many others. 

Even when Teri only had three kids, she was miserable. Some women just don't like kids and don't really want any. But they have them anyway, because society tells them there's something wrong with them if they don't*. Teri would have felt this pressure even during her pre-fundie years. Then she went on to have the five reversals and was even more miserable. If the Moody books are any indication of what life was like in the Maxwell house, Teri spent a lot of time in her room while the kids followed the schedule and turned to their dad or grandparents for help whenever they needed it.

But if someone is as depressed as Teri was when the kids were little, they can't deal with sending their kids to school, either. You have to get them ready and get them there on time. They might need things like coats, hats, mittens, boots, lunch boxes, lunch money. Each teacher has a different procedure in terms of how much homework the kid gets, what kind of homework it is, and how it's turned in (for example, some teachers require parents to sign a homework folder and make sure the kid brings it in on a certain day each week). If your kid has a learning or behavior problem, the school will expect you to attend conferences, meetings, etc. and then follow through on whatever the experts recommend. This is A LOT for a parent with depression to deal with, especially if she also has little ones at home. In a way, homeschooling would be easier because you set your own schedule (which we know is one of Teri's strengths), there's none of the stress involved with getting kids to and from school with exactly the right forms and accessories per kid, and you don't have to deal with the outside world.

 

*I have personal experience on this front-- I've had people say some really rude and nasty things to me once I hit my 30s and still didn't have kids. I actually do like kids and I have worked with them in various capacities. But I don't believe in bringing children into this world if you can't afford to take care of them. So I didn't have any.

[kpmom]

That's a good point FloraDoraDolly about Teri feeling more stress if she sent all 8 of her kids to school.

Just as her three older would be almost done, the next five would be starting.

I had a child in special education and the school is even much more up in your business in that case.  I actually did homeschool him for a couple of years and not having to deal with the school system during that time was the best part of it.

My kids are beyond school age and it's really nice not having to be bothered with all that.