Chelsy and John Maxwell 5; Pregnant, but Still Waiting to Read about the Honeymoon

[ophelia]

Chelsy hasn't updated her social media for a long time, but they appeared on her family's insta. John and her visited her grandparents. Chelsy has a cute baby bump and damn John is hot af IMHO.

 

[JermajestyDuggar]

Her cute little Mennonite grandparents are exactly how I pictured them. Her arthritic hands remind me a lot of my great grandmother’s. 

[OhNoNike]

Are they grandparents on her mom’s side or dad’s side?

[JermajestyDuggar]

18 minutes ago, OhNoNike said:

Are they grandparents on her mom’s side or dad’s side?

Just looking at the grandma, I’m guessing her mom’s side (Stolzfus). The grandma looks a lot like Becky. But I know that doesn’t say anything for certain. 

[fundiewatch]

Mustard cardigan! Very Duggar. ?

[SPHASH]

I still say the Maxwells are ashamed of Chelsy.

[sableduck]

Those are Chelsy’s maternal grandparents.  I know her cousins much better, but I know her grandparents enough to recognize them out and about.  I wish I’d known Chelsy was in the area because I am trying to figure out how to finagle meeting her.

Chelsy’s grandmother would be absolutely horrified by Steve’s lack of hospitality.  Everyone, regardless of religion, race, creed or sexual orientation is welcome at her table, typical of most of the Mennonites I know.  They may disagree with you, but they’ll feed you and try to give you leftovers to take home. Fasting and two animal crackers and only going to churches filled with the elderly and your family is completely foreign and probably half heretical.

My BFF is Mennonite; I may send her some of the blog links and get her take on them.

[daisyjane1234]

I don't really follow the Bontragers.  Do we know the story of their decision to leave the Old (or Conservative, can't tell) Order. 

[JermajestyDuggar]

4 minutes ago, daisyjane1234 said:

I don't really follow the Bontragers.  Do we know the story of their decision to leave the Old (or Conservative, can't tell) Order. 

If you look at Becky and Marlin’s siblings, most don’t dress like the grandparents. There are some modern modest like Becky. I’m not saying they aren’t still Mennonite. Just that they are choosing to dress different from their parents. So I don’t believe it’s uncommon to have people doing things a little differently in the Bontrager/Stolzfus families. I don’t know if there are siblings who believe similarly to the Bons though. They both come from big families so there are tons of extended family members. 

[Granwych]

1 hour ago, SPHASH said:

I still say the Maxwells are ashamed of Chelsy.

I think they're more frightened of her than ashamed.

[PennySycamore]

@JermajestyDuggar, looking at those hands, I imagine how many loaves of bread they've kneaded, how many cows they've milked, how many eggs they've gathered from the nest. They remind me of my grandma's as well -a farmwife's hands.

[JermajestyDuggar]

2 minutes ago, PennySycamore said:

@JermajestyDuggar, looking at those hands, I imagine how many loaves of bread they've kneaded, how many cows they've milked, how many eggs they've gathered from the nest. They remind me of my grandma's as well -a farmwife's hands.

Same. My great grandma made everything from scratch, sewed, played the piano, and gardened all the time. She used her hands constantly.

[HerNameIsBuffy]

6 hours ago, SPHASH said:

I still say the Maxwells are ashamed of Chelsy.

Why would they be ashamed of her?

Apropos of nothing, I still can't tell the difference between John and Joseph and I'm not totally convinced they aren't the same person.

[SPHASH]

40 minutes ago, HerNameIsBuffy said:

Why would they be ashamed of her?

Apropos of nothing, I still can't tell the difference between John and Joseph and I'm not totally convinced they aren't the same person.

Chelsy has worn pants, likes movies, and forgot her wedding vows.  That's a mortal sin in Maxhell.

[Black Aliss]

5 hours ago, PennySycamore said:

@JermajestyDuggar, looking at those hands, I imagine how many loaves of bread they've kneaded, how many cows they've milked, how many eggs they've gathered from the nest. They remind me of my grandma's as well -a farmwife's hands.

They are beautiful hands, aren't they? They tell so many stories.

[Coconut Flan]

41 minutes ago, SPHASH said:

Chelsy has worn pants, likes movies, and forgot her wedding vows.  That's a mortal sin in Maxhell.

She also cooks real food in normal quantities to feed the number of people invited.  I bet she puts meat in the burritos, too.

[nelliebelle1197]

2 hours ago, Coconut Flan said:

She also cooks real food in normal quantities to feed the number of people invited.  I bet she puts meat in the burritos, too.

Nothing can be as shameful as NR-Anna's use of store-bought tortillas. Poor Sarah NEVER fails to mention that.

[petrushka]

12 hours ago, Coconut Flan said:

She also cooks real food in normal quantities to feed the number of people invited.  I bet she puts meat in the burritos, too.

The road to perdition is paved with makeup, coordinated well fitting clothes, and delicious plentiful food.  Ask Steve.

[fundiefan]

19 hours ago, Granwych said:

I think they're more frightened of her than ashamed.

Oh, absolutely. She is a threat for sure. On paper, she and her family fit all the criteria. But, in practice, she is completely off the Maxhell wheels. Look at her maternity clothes - very modern; she ain't hiding that bump or even trying. She grew up enjoying food and seems to hav taught John what real food is with her choices. She is very close to her family and they see them often, so she is not a Maxwell Compound Bound daughter-in-law. She didn't swallow their kool-aid - the Bontragers have kool-aid of their own. She still blogs, although sporadically, even though she now has a husband headship. She has an Instagram account. She wears makeup, and it's not some natural little blush - it's very clear she has makeup on and she isn't ashamed. She even wrote about her particular mascara preferences in one of the wedding posts. Her wedding was not  photographed by Christopher. 

She is still a dangerous fundie through and through, as is her family. The Bontragers are not "better" people than the Maxwells. They just package themselves differently. And even that is a threat to Steve.

[HerNameIsBuffy]

10 minutes ago, fundiefan said:

She didn't swallow their kool-aid - the Bontragers have kool-aid of their own

I'm going to show my ignorance of inter-fundy dynamics, but these people all seem to be in some weird interconnected community with differences in belief ... to a point.  

Does anyone know the difference in religious beliefs/practices between the Bontragers and Maxwells?

And...could it be a double edged sword for Steve in having one of his kids marry into what seems to me to be a much bigger name in fundy circles?  Like on one hand that's a good catch, but on the other I can see Steve being jealous as being the lesser known between the two?

I could be wrong - just interested in the dynamic.

27 minutes ago, fundiefan said:

Her wedding was not  photographed by Christopher. 

This is the kind of thing that could fester forever in even non-fundy families.  Can you imagine the conversations that happened over THAT?

[fundiefan]

I think at the core, their religion & beliefs are the same. That's why I think Chelsea looked good on paper/in theory. But, the way the live their lives is different. Steve is so controlling and has deep emotional issues; papa Bontrager doesn't seem to have the same personal issues, so he raised his family with the same beliefs/religion, but not so much control. 

Read any Bontrager post - from Allison, the pompous Josh, even Chelsea. They have the same beliefs about their god, about women, about idolizing the family unit - particularly the males, about society & culture (anti gay, anti choice, will force the world to pray their way if given the chance, women are meant to breed once married-working for the family can be done to fill the time & bring Papa money until the right manly man shows up - their god is involved in the tinitest details of their lives from holding off  a snowstorm to clearing clouds for a perfect view - all just. for. them.....)

The Bontrager's packaging is just different and less about the father's control issues than Maxwell's.

[daisyjane1234]

17 hours ago, SPHASH said:

Chelsy has worn pants, likes movies, and forgot her wedding vows.  That's a mortal sin in Maxhell.

I think it is more than that.  If I am hearing the discussion correctly, she comes from a family that, while religious, is more welcoming and hospitable than the Maxwell's.  Are the Maxwell's threatened by the possible incursion?

[HerNameIsBuffy]

Just now, daisyjane1234 said:

I think it is more than that.  If I am hearing the discussion correctly, she comes from a family that, while religious, is more welcoming and hospitable than the Maxwell's.  Are the Maxwell's threatened by the possible incursion?

IME a difference in levels of extroverted socializing is one of the things that can be hard to adjust to.

I have absolutely offended people in in-law type situations by greeting people without hugs or being more reserved than their baseline.

And conversely I've been highly annoyed by expectations to be social well beyond my comfort level.  

(Not saying my way is better, just different.  And those differences can make even people uncomfortable even if they are more tolerant of differences than the Maxwells.)

[anjulibai]

I don't think it's extroverted vs. introverted. The Maxwells like getting together with others - it's just that they are restricted in who those others are. 

It's all about control. Steve controls his family by limiting them, in who they socialize with, in what they do for jobs, in what they eat. He justifies it all as about being Godly and keeping his children on the Christian path.

The Bontragers aren't like that and yet, their children pretty clearly follow the Christian path. The Bontragers are a threat to Steve because they prove you can do things differently and still be a proper fundamentalist Christian, with all the same horrible beliefs. 

What if more of his children begin questioning how Steve does things? He'll lose control, which is his primary motivation. Chelsy represents loss of control to Steve and is, thus, a major threat. 

[HerNameIsBuffy]

4 minutes ago, anjulibai said:

I don't think it's extroverted vs. introverted.

Yes, my wording was terrible there - I didn't mean it in the introverted/extroverted kind of way.  Just different levels of enthusiasm for socializing. 

I've never gotten the impression the Maxwells enjoy getting together with anyone, but more like they are doing their best to copy social constructs of humans and falling short.

Even things like referring to married kids as "extended family" shows their natural tendency for distance in their relationships.