Bro Gary Hawkins 7: Asking For Thoughts and Chairs

[Jug Band Baby]

This...guy.  Wow.  So he spent time calling 200 churches telling them he needs him an RV, and a couple said they'll pray/talk to their congregations.  Anyone else think that that means praying he finds some brain cells and that talking means warning?  Did he get the RV?  I'm reading as fast as I can in the limited time I've got in the last couple days, am behind on the Rods 'n' Naugs, and am reading about weens and man gravy 'cause that's good man eatin'.  I can't believe he's not a troll.  I'm just...wow.  WOW.

[Jug Band Baby]

"I’m not sure who coined the nickname “G. Haw,” but it gave me a good laugh. Perfection. Yeeee hawwww! "

When I read this, my brain crossed G. Haw with something an aunt used to say.  

 

Geeeeeee Hawwwww!  Ride 'em, cowgirl!

 

But I don't want anyone riding that, and the thought of it being cowgirl makes me lose my appetite for dinner, which happens to be grilled weens and tonight.  Hubs decided on that because I've been quoting these threads today!

[keepercjr]

3 hours ago, Jug Band Baby said:

This...guy.  Wow.  So he spent time calling 200 churches telling them he needs him an RV, and a couple said they'll pray/talk to their congregations.  Anyone else think that that means praying he finds some brain cells and that talking means warning?  Did he get the RV?  I'm reading as fast as I can in the limited time I've got in the last couple days, am behind on the Rods 'n' Naugs, and am reading about weens and man gravy 'cause that's good man eatin'.  I can't believe he's not a troll.  I'm just...wow.  WOW.

Well he didn’t get the rv that he wanted but he did somehow raise $5000 and bought an old bus that was converted to an rv.  Several people advised him against it but he did it and it literally broke down the same day he drove it away. So now he has no working anything, including a car since his vee-hickle done broke down too.  He is staying in a trailer (or something similar) belonging to his parents on his parents’ property (and driving his parents’ car at the moment while he is on the road doing revivals).  You can’t make this guy up !

[Jug Band Baby]

55 minutes ago, keepercjr said:

Well he didn’t get the rv that he wanted but he did somehow raise $5000 and bought an old bus that was converted to an rv.  Several people advised him against it but he did it and it literally broke down the same day he drove it away. So now he has no working anything, including a car since his vee-hickle done broke down too.  He is staying in a trailer (or something similar) belonging to his parents on his parents’ property (and driving his parents’ car at the moment while he is on the road doing revivals).  You can’t make this guy up !

I got to that part, and saw the pictures someone here posted of the sink.  But I can't find anymore pics on his FB page, and haven't gotten to the part about it breaking down.  I sat here shaking my head about how much he was pushing people to give him money.  He's more brazen than Jill in that, but at least he intended for his kids to all have their own beds instead of wherever the Rodkids sleep...?  Haws and Rods and Naugs, oh my.  They're all the worst in their own ways, and all suck.  But the best of them might be the person who thinks a shed and tossing shit is the best because exactly one adult among them bothers to work, and that's Nicole.  Wow, man.  There are people making Nicole Naugler look good in comparison.  But G-Haw is at least making us laugh.

We really had weens for dinner because of that guy.

[SuperNova]

4 hours ago, keepercjr said:

He is staying in a trailer (or something similar) belonging to his parents on his parents’ property (and driving his parents’ car at the moment while he is on the road doing revivals).  You can’t make this guy up !

How did I miss this? When did he get kicked out of the church basement they were holed up in? So he has no rv, no car, no home, and he still won't find a job. 

G-Haw and Becky stayed in that basement all winter doing jack s#!t when they could have been working actual jobs and saving a little. Selling toothpasta and jurry doesn't count.

[Jug Band Baby]

So I read this: 

and laughed while my husband was carrying kid 2 upstairs to bed.  Kid fell asleep on the couch and would be disoriented when she wakes up at night (what's it like having kids who sleep through the night? mine are 7 and 8 now, and always still wake up at least once each).  He asked what I was laughing at, and I said, "The weens guys was called Captain Goodweens," and he laughed hard enough to almost drop her.  He just came back downstairs and said, "Captain Goodweens is actually a pretty good nickname."

He now knows all I know about this guy, and is still...

Got interrupted because husband came back downstairs and I showed him the first picture of the weenie gravy here: 

 and he asked if this guy really is for real, and then I showed him the "supper bowel" here: https://www.facebook.com/ghawkins38/posts/1824841470894012

and now I'm typing in real time, and he knows that usually means I'm quoting what he is saying  So I told him this guy and his wife claim to be "victims FROM fornication.  "FROM?  What does that even mean?" and I told him no one knows, but that Cap. Goodweens and wife were both married before and have 7 kids between them, including 3 living with their dad and step-dad, and he said, "So let me get this straight.  There were at least two women, human women, willing to have sex with him?" and then reached for a vape (cannabis, yo, it's only brought out when the kids are in bed) and is sitting here shaking his head.  Some banter I was laughing too much to type.  Now he's heading to bed and he said, "Enjoy Bro Goodweens.  That really sounds like some really shitty campy 70's space movie or something.  Captain Good Ween."

He'll be asking for a recap in the morning.  I just know it.  And you can bet your ass I'm planning to make "weenie gravy" for breakfast and tell him it's "good man-eating."

[MarblesMom]

Bro GHaw's latest video posted on FB is possibly seizure inducing, if not at the very least vertigo inducing.  Be advised.

 

[PumaLover]

2 hours ago, MarblesMom said:

Bro GHaw's latest video posted on FB is possibly seizure inducing, if not at the very least vertigo inducing.  Be advised.

 

Wow, you weren't kidding! They didn't actually sound too bad but WTF was he doing with the phone?? Just set it down in one place, and quit changing the orientation.

@Jug Band Baby it's great to have you here on this thread! I'm laughing at all your comments. I wish my husband thought Bro G was as funny as yours does! I have to sit here and laugh by myself.

[PumaLover]

OK folks, they done past out all they're fliers and is having a ice cream. (sic) (not snarking on ice cream, that sounds good about now).

Just posting cuz I think it's funny that they passed out however many hundreds of flyers with their name misspelled. LOL

(Still practicing my spoilers @Jellybean! <3 )

Spoiler

Bro Gary

 

[smittykins]

1 hour ago, PumaLover said:

OK folks, they done past out all they're fliers and is having a ice cream. (sic) (not snarking on ice cream, that sounds good about now).

*Tries to ignore the Ben and Jerry's Peanut Butter Cup calling her name from the freezer*

[Beermeet]

I wonder where Bro Gary left his two broken down RV's.  I'm positive 2 people or churches are pissed off being burdened with his old RV's.  

[Carol]

I don't remember seeing this video from 2 years ago.  Gary is in New England?  Maine?  Some other state, he's never quite sure.  Love the hat and feel sad about his half jacket collar.  It's the first time I've seen him in something that looks nice but his collar is a train wreck.  OTOH, maybe it really does have a half-collar as Gary will not be yoked to anything heathen.  

I think he should start his own Teeny Tiny Hat Club.

 

[Don'tlikekoolaid]

OK Folks, just watched latest video. I did know eyeballs could suffer seizures.  

[larrysmom]

2 hours ago, Don'tlikekoolaid said:

OK Folks, just watched latest video. I did know eyeballs could suffer seizures.  

I like to think he's just directing his own edgy music video. But yes, take some Dramamine before watching.

And it appears his FB Live audience commented on his directing skills, too...

Spoiler

 

[Black Aliss]

On 6/22/2018 at 7:20 AM, Coy Koi said:

Don't feel bad. I looked at her page. She's not just bad at Facebook, she's bad at the English language. This is cute though, everything about it is so old-person.

That is really fucking offensive. Everything about her three facebook accounts, all with the same profile photo, is so "not-a-very-bright-person". Her age has nothing to do with it.  Some people are  just born stupid.

Coy Koi you've made a number of offensive ageists comments in the past and I've always just moved on, but I'm pretty sick of it. Would you say that something is just so black-person? Just so Jew-person? Just so queer-person? Then why are you so bigoted against people who are old? Do you really believe we are all stupid, incompetent, doddering (but sweet, cute, etc) fools?

If you're lucky you will be old some day. Think about how you will want to be treated then. 

[Jug Band Baby]

Heeeey, there's debate over flea markets being exciting?  I miss good ol' flea markets.  The flea markets where I am are hipster places now, with carefully curates collections of gently-hung vintage clothing and "unique" "upcycled" pieces instead of the markets of my youth, where you dug through someone else's junk until you found a treasure or two for a buck.  Instead of Madame Alexander dolls that the sellers think are just generic dolls for a couple quarters, you'll find dolls in cases that genuinely are generic being sold as rare for $50, and instead of old shirts best cut up to repair crazy quilts, all the dud-duds have been tossed and replaced with new-old-stock for $250.

On of my favorite southern dishes is to boil up some ham hocks in a pot with black-eye peas or black-eye susans, then pull the meat off the hocks, serve with cornbread and an unhealthy helping of mayo right on top of a piping hot bowl of them beans and meat.   I use my Jethro bowl for that.  And I see @WhatWouldJohnCrichtonDo? defined it already.

I'm entirely comfortable making fun of someone calling Walmart fancy when that person's financial state is because they're making a choice to not work, to go out of their way to not work, and then blame everyone else for them not being poor because everyone else who works doesn't want to support a sloth.

@Texas Heifer, Fred Meyer branded stuff tends to kick some ass.  If there's something FM brand, chances are good I'm buying it over any other brand.  Theirs are the only black olives I like.  I do make my coffee in a drip pot usually (using whatever the brand of beans they have is), but have used their instant with cream and generic sucralose, and yes, it's damn good!  But it makes me pee like a race horse when drip coffee doesn't, so I make the instant when I feel like I've retained a lot of water.

Way back in February, Heif said, "

"If you wuddn' willin' ta go through tha faar, God wuddn'...he wuddn' even use you."

What." 

I think I figured it out.  "If you aren't willing to go through the fire, God wouldn't use you."

I've got Tourette's, for real.  Part of me wants to be all, "Heeeyyyyy, don't insult people with Tourette's," but then the other part of me is like, "Heh, it's fun to find humor in something that sucks."  The second part wins out.  No, really, I firmly do believe it's better to find humor in things like this, and think that the first part is just because I'm so used to always hearing how everything is supposed to be offensive to someone.

@FloraKitty35, Buck Angel is the example I used when my grandparents started ranting about men in women's bathrooms, and using the bathroom that goes with how god made you because perverts. I posted a picture on one of my grandpa's (or was it grandma's, either way, I tagged them both) of Buck and asked them where Buck, by name not pronoun, should use the bathroom.  A couple hours later, I tagged them both and told them that Buck was born a girl, but identifies as a man, and still has a vagina.  So how would they feel about "her" going into the women's room because if "her" vagina, of if they'd prefer him to go into the men's room despite what he's got between his legs.  Not surprising, my comments were deleted.  I hope they never follow through on going to Paris.  95% of the bathrooms have shared sink/mirror areas, and then stalls where the man/woman signs are just suggestions, and 4% are just plain who-the-fuck-ever wants to go in whichever, like the bathroom at the plaza at Trocodero, and I saw exactly one bathroom that was really separated, and that was at a mall in a small village immediately south of Paris, but even then, people went into both without a care in the world.  It's like people there know that a toilet is just a place to pee.

 

Can I be a sis?

Sis Jugs, born to a mom who didn't know she was in labor until the doctor told her when she was at a prenatal appointment.  Born the day one of my mom's sisters died, and no one let me forget it.  Born to be told most of my life I was the baby almost no one wanted born.  Born just a smidge shy of 2 full feel long, 6lb15oz, and had to live under lights for a week because jaundice.  I don't what what my birth-achievement was.  Maybe it's not being bitter?

PS When I was a kid, I went to a private Christian school that was everything I wasn't.  I was the bigot they told us not to be, and I thought I was a better Christian because birth control was not trusting god, though they taught it's a personal decision and presented facts without judgement.  I can see now that that school is so liberal that it's like a liberal school with religion slapped on as a mask or something.  EN-EE-WEENS!  I remember the pastor preaching to us that Jesus already knows what our hearts want, even if we sometimes don't, and that sometimes we think we know what we want, but we what we want is something we don't know we want.  He told us to pray to Jesus to look into our hearts and pray for us, and that that is better than sitting there asking for this and that and for this to happen and for that to come our way.  I underestimated at the time just what he was saying.  In retrospect, I can see that part of that was to teach us to be content with what we'd been given, and that it didn't put the burden of our happiness on anyone else.  "Dear god, give me this" can excuse a person from feeling a need to do anything for themselves, but "please look into my heart and pray for me" doesn't come with the excuse "but I asked god/Jesus for it, so it's up to him/them to give it to me."

PPS I'm halfway through page 8 of thread 4.  Guys, this whole thing is so fucking funny that I can't even.  I'm behind on the Rods 'n' Naug (frank 'n' beans!...weens 'n' beans?) because of this.  Holy fucknuggets, I haven't laughed so hard in ages.  Husband is now asking about Cap. Goodweens and the RV lady because he's now interested in WTF is up with Jill.  Something about the Naugs makes him so mad that he really gets angry and asks why CPS isn't doing something meaningful.  But he's fascinated by Jill, and laughs at the Ween.

[Candydandy]

Ok folks it seems like Bro is helpin another Bro start a church but but its so small not much  to help but if you can help them help. Hopefully there will be no more vertigo causin seizure inducin videos- its not That hard to hold a camera phone straight is it??

[keepercjr]

On 6/24/2018 at 12:17 AM, SuperNova said:

How did I miss this? When did he get kicked out of the church basement they were holed up in? So he has no rv, no car, no home, and he still won't find a job. 

G-Haw and Becky stayed in that basement all winter doing jack s#!t when they could have been working actual jobs and saving a little. Selling toothpasta and jurry doesn't count.

They moved out of the basement a few months ago.  They spent that winter in the church basement as a season of rest or some other such nonsense.  I took a look at his posts but there was no official “we’re back home” notice.  I think it was right before their pops a roxy jewelry stuff died.  He mentioned it in one of their live videos.

seems pretty sad for the 2 boys left and no wonder his daughter decided to live with her grandparents.  Like you said, no rv, no car, no home.. just a trailer to pull a tent.  Just like Jill, he thinks grifting is the way to get whatever he needs.  This all has to come crashing down at some point but you gotta wonder where his rock bottom is..  because it seems like this should have been it.  And somehow Becky finds this ok.  I am so glad her kids are out of that mess living with people who work good jobs and can provide what they need (you know... like a stable roof over ones head). 

[Coy Koi]

On 6/24/2018 at 9:56 PM, Black Aliss said:

That is really fucking offensive. Everything about her three facebook accounts, all with the same profile photo, is so "not-a-very-bright-person". Her age has nothing to do with it.  Some people are  just born stupid.

Coy Koi you've made a number of offensive ageists comments in the past and I've always just moved on, but I'm pretty sick of it. Would you say that something is just so black-person? Just so Jew-person? Just so queer-person? Then why are you so bigoted against people who are old? Do you really believe we are all stupid, incompetent, doddering (but sweet, cute, etc) fools?

If you're lucky you will be old some day. Think about how you will want to be treated then. 

I'm kind of old already and I do make old person comments about myself. But I really can't recall commenting that much about age at all, so I don't know if you're mistaking me for someone else or if I'm just not remembering. I will think about what I say in the future though.

I'm not bigoted against old people, but generally people in different age groups act quite differently on social media. I can and do find humor in it in all directions. Social media is so new that of course people of different ages are going to use it in very different ways, and all of those ways can be funny or ridiculous. Also, I don't think social media savvy is in any way correlated with being a competent, intelligent person in general. To me, it's more like my kid laughing at me for being terrible at video games or me laughing at her for thinking she's special for knowing what a VCR is. That's far different from making fun of someone for lacking vital, necessary skills.

[Georgiana]

1 hour ago, Coy Koi said:

I'm kind of old already and I do make old person comments about myself. But I really can't recall commenting that much about age at all, so I don't know if you're mistaking me for someone else or if I'm just not remembering. I will think about what I say in the future though.

I'm not bigoted against old people, but generally people in different age groups act quite differently on social media. I can and do find humor in it in all directions. Social media is so new that of course people of different ages are going to use it in very different ways, and all of those ways can be funny or ridiculous. Also, I don't think social media savvy is in any way correlated with being a competent, intelligent person in general. To me, it's more like my kid laughing at me for being terrible at video games or me laughing at her for thinking she's special for knowing what a VCR is. That's far different from making fun of someone for lacking vital, necessary skills.

I don't think ALL "old people" are bad at computers, but I do think that as a group, people above a certain age tend to have less understanding of "internet social norms" than those who essentially grew up with computers and social media, and this can cause them to seem unintelligent or "off" when they truly aren't.  

So age is something that may be important to look for when judging internet posts because it IS a mitigating factor and can change how you view the post.  I try to be understanding of people who act strange on the internet when they are above a certain age because I understand that they may just not be familiar with internet conventions due to not growing up with it.  Like my friend's uncle Rob, who enjoys following the posts of a local historical society as they catalog various demolitions and renovations, and then enjoys commenting on those posts about how "Millennials don't like old buildings".  I mean, who do you think is running the facebook page, Rob?  VERY likely a Millennial.  And also, not the place for that rant.  Another time, Rob commented on one of my posts that he had no response, but he would wait for his brother to respond. That was the entirety of the comment.  Thanks, Rob.  

But Rob is not an unintelligent or socially inept man, despite what his facebook would lead you to believe.  In person, he's smart, witty, and outgoing.  He's just INTERNET socially inept because he doesn't truly understand the conventions, so he doesn't really "get" what needs to be posted, what doesn't, and how best to express himself.   He tries his best and follows his instincts, it just happens that his instincts are WAY off.  Which is totally understandable, because this is not something he grew up with or learned to navigate organically.  So I understand why Rob posts what he does, and I let it go.   Meanwhile, I judge my cousin MUCH more harshly for what she posts because while her posts are equally as dumb as Rob's, she has no excuse for being a moron on the internet.  In the same vein, my grandma can send me a text butchered by autocorrect, and I'll decode and respond as if nothing has happened because dammit, I know she tried hard.  My mother does that and I know she was just too lazy to put her glasses on, so I'm just going to make fun of her.  

Computers are like a language.  Yes, SOME people who didn't "speak computer" from a young age will still achieve complete mastery.  That's AWESOME, and those people should be praised!  But most people who learn something beyond the window of youth will always have a bit of an "accent", will always struggle a bit, and will always seem a little "off" in their expressions.  Which is why it's important to check if they are communicating in their "native tongue", because it is SO EASY to sound stupid when you aren't speaking your native tongue.

I don't think it's fair to have the same standards for people who didn't grow up with the internet and those that did.  It's not a level playing field, and I think it's fine to recognize that.  And it's always great to ask if there are mitigating factors before we snark on someone.  I stand by that age is a mitigating factor on the internet, so I don't think it's unfair to ask before poking fun.  It doesn't mean that ALL people above a certain age make those mistakes, it just means that it's MORE UNDERSTANDABLE if they do and we shouldn't mock them for it.  

Also, posters here are a terrible benchmark for judging internet competence of ANY group because if you can successfully post and participate on an internet forum like this, you're pretty computer savvy  A niche internet forum is WELL above Internet 101 stuff!

[Black Aliss]

2 hours ago, Coy Koi said:

I'm kind of old already and I do make old person comments about myself. But I really can't recall commenting that much about age at all, so I don't know if you're mistaking me for someone else or if I'm just not remembering. I will think about what I say in the future though.

I make old person senior moment jokes myself and in hindsight I believe I over-reacted to your comment. I apologize for that. 

 

 

[Coy Koi]

3 minutes ago, Black Aliss said:

I make old person senior moment jokes myself and in hindsight I believe I over-reacted to your comment. I apologize for that. 

Thank you for saying that. No hard feelings! I'll make sure to be sensitive and kind about what I say in the future. I'm having a little bit of a hard time right now because my stepdad (who is a dad to me) is having a hip replacement this Thursday and I'm very worried about him. My daughter and I are going to take care of their home and pets until he comes home. I'm sure he'll be okay, but of course I'm worried that he might not.

[Black Aliss]

1 hour ago, Georgiana said:

I don't think ALL "old people" are bad at computers, but I do think that as a group, people above a certain age tend to have less understanding of "internet social norms" than those who essentially grew up with computers and social media, and this can cause them to seem unintelligent or "off" when they truly aren't.  

So age is something that may be important to look for when judging internet posts because it IS a mitigating factor and can change how you view the post.  I try to be understanding of people who act strange on the internet when they are above a certain age because I understand that they may just not be familiar with internet conventions due to not growing up with it.  Like my friend's uncle Rob, who enjoys following the posts of a local historical society as they catalog various demolitions and renovations, and then enjoys commenting on those posts about how "Millennials don't like old buildings".  I mean, who do you think is running the facebook page, Rob?  VERY likely a Millennial.  And also, not the place for that rant.  Another time, Rob commented on one of my posts that he had no response, but he would wait for his brother to respond. That was the entirety of the comment.  Thanks, Rob.  

But Rob is not an unintelligent or socially inept man, despite what his facebook would lead you to believe.  In person, he's smart, witty, and outgoing.  He's just INTERNET socially inept because he doesn't truly understand the conventions, so he doesn't really "get" what needs to be posted, what doesn't, and how best to express himself.   He tries his best and follows his instincts, it just happens that his instincts are WAY off.  Which is totally understandable, because this is not something he grew up with or learned to navigate organically.  So I understand why Rob posts what he does, and I let it go.   Meanwhile, I judge my cousin MUCH more harshly for what she posts because while her posts are equally as dumb as Rob's, she has no excuse for being a moron on the internet.  In the same vein, my grandma can send me a text butchered by autocorrect, and I'll decode and respond as if nothing has happened because dammit, I know she tried hard.  My mother does that and I know she was just too lazy to put her glasses on, so I'm just going to make fun of her.  

Computers are like a language.  Yes, SOME people who didn't "speak computer" from a young age will still achieve complete mastery.  That's AWESOME, and those people should be praised!  But most people who learn something beyond the window of youth will always have a bit of an "accent", will always struggle a bit, and will always seem a little "off" in their expressions.  Which is why it's important to check if they are communicating in their "native tongue", because it is SO EASY to sound stupid when you aren't speaking your native tongue.

I don't think it's fair to have the same standards for people who didn't grow up with the internet and those that did.  It's not a level playing field, and I think it's fine to recognize that.  And it's always great to ask if there are mitigating factors before we snark on someone.  I stand by that age is a mitigating factor on the internet, so I don't think it's unfair to ask before poking fun.  It doesn't mean that ALL people above a certain age make those mistakes, it just means that it's MORE UNDERSTANDABLE if they do and we shouldn't mock them for it.  

Also, posters here are a terrible benchmark for judging internet competence of ANY group because if you can successfully post and participate on an internet forum like this, you're pretty computer savvy  A niche internet forum is WELL above Internet 101 stuff!

I agree. I'm an outlier for my demographic because, while I come from a family of engineers, I didn't get my own engineering degree until I was middle-aged. I had no choice but to become internet savvy at a time (~1989) when being involved in social media ( yes, social media was alive and lively in the 1980's) required fluency in command-line unix tools and the ability to compose a posting using vi (Google it, kids! It was U. G. L. Y.)  

I know people who are considerably older than I who took to the Internet immediately, and people who are considerably younger than I  who just can't figure it out.  I think for people of any age, there has to be something in it for them. I'm remembering  telling my first CS prof that I was really struggling with his class that I just didn't get it (it being data structures) and maybe I should retake this class. His response was that one day I would come across a problem that I could only solve by writing code, and then I'd be able to get it. The internet/email/social media is also something you get only when there's a compelling reason to do so. Typically that's wanting to see pictures of the grandkids or, as with one of my older siblings, OMG! online shopping!!!!

There are many times when the snark here and everywhere makes me uncomfortable, mainly when the people we snark on are just not all that bright. I think that's why I prefer to pick on people like the Maxwells, who are smart enough to know better; they just choose to be sanctimonious jerks.

 

[Jug Band Baby]

Well, I was in bed, about to get it on with the husband.  I grabbed his junk, then he leaned close to my ear, and whispered, "So, is it a good ween?"  I froze for about a second, then laughed so hard that I accidentally pulled too hard.  He screamed and laughed, which woke the kids.  Now I'm sitting downstairs on the couch reading more about Cap. Goodweens because I don't think I could lay down and sleep now, not after that.

 

So to go back to the shit about shitting in the woods:

"Are you supposed to aim for the tree or use it for "scraping off?"

Oy vey!

Hang on to it to get in a easier squatting position."

No, no, @Granwych and @Beermeet!  You find a sturdy forked branch that's really, really sturdy.  Then you sit on that like a potty seat.  I swear you can always find one.  No squatting necessary when you find a makeshit potty seat.

So way back when, when I was a god-fearin' girl who went to church every chance I could, we were told that the Lawd didn't say make a pretty noise, just a joyful noise.  But then, when it comes to trying to get money, it's not honest to try to charge for something substandard.  If you're trying to sell your skills as a musician or singer, it was expected that you make a pretty noise worthy of that payment.

Haaaay, end of thread 4!  On to 5 I go.

[Jug Band Baby]

@Georgiana, awwwww, I guess that little 3-year-old did get something out of the trip.  On Youtube, there's a woman who does a channel called Ask a Mortician, and she just did a video about Pearl Harbor.  She grew up in Hawaii.

And oh, rehearsal dinners.  55 of our 70 guest had to travel in, and when we found out that ALL people who travel are supposed to be invited if there's a rehearsal dinner, and we absolutely wouldn't afford a second meal for 55 people (and when that high of a percentage of the guest list would be invited, it's going to have to be 100%), we decided to skip it altogether.  When the weather is rainy, an outdoor BBQ isn't possible.  So it would have had to be a restaurant somewhere, and easily at least a grand on the very, very cheap end.  Well, the day of the wedding, the wedding started without me.  Everyone thought someone else was going to tell me when.  So I sat there in the bridal dressing area, with my girls, wondering when we should go get into place.  The mistake was realized when I wasn't there to go down the aisle.  I haven't let anyone live it down to this day!  Hopefully your friend's aunt's wedding had no bigger snafus than a cute preschooler praying for dead people from her grandma's party!

@Snarkylark, that "paprotsy" is probably the only MLM thing I'd ever consider buying, and that's only because there's no attempt at making cheap fashion jewelry out to be anything more than cheap piece of cheap fashion jewelry.  I like me some Claire's stuff, and so do my girls.  But alas, I know no one who sells it.  I can have a teensy bit of respect for an MLM that doesn't try to make cheap shit sound like something sooper speeshull and then mark up the price 5x over what something decent would cost (like PlexShit or MoolaNo).

@Georgiana, I have a friend who I'm chatting with while reading thread 5, and she's annoying the fuck out of me.  She's angry because a car lot won't let her and her boyfriend by a new Hyundai Tuscon despite her bf having a job though she doesn't (when you've got 2 repos in 2 years, and credit that is 403 for him, 550 for her, according to her, then denials happen), and a used car lot wants $5k down on a $15k-newer Altima (I'm surprised that they'd let them take that car at all).  So I sent her a link of their caterwauling, and she asked me if I hate her or something.  It's 2am in the morning, nookie got interrupted because of hubs asking if it's a good ween, she's bitching because she thinks she's entitled to a new car, so, yeah, for the moment, I kinda do, I guess.  But at least I'm amused now.

I swear I'm never going to catch up.  Though posts are short here, the laughs are long and take a lot of time.  I think my blood pressure's going back to normal thanks to reading this instead of so much Drumpf news.