Josie and Kelton 1: Here We Go Again

[Seculardaisy]

Kelton discusses the loss of his mother in tonight’s episode. Here’s a preview.

https://www.batesfamilyblog.com/2018/06/keltons-late-mother.html?m=1

[TeaELSee]

4 hours ago, JemimaPuddle-Duck said:

That me tear up. She seemed to really love her children. Seems like the youngest baby, since four older children are there at the hospital.

Wait.. if that is her 5th child after birth and she is alive I’m confused. Her obituary states she died during childbirth. I guess it doesn’t really matter but I  imagined the baby was in peril also. 

It is horrible and sad regardless but I find the wording odd.

”Kristy Dotson Balka, 39, wife of Michael H. Balka, died Tuesday, April 14, 2009 during the birth of her fifth child. “

[VelociRapture]

5 hours ago, Seculardaisy said:

Kelton discusses the loss of his mother in tonight’s episode. Here’s a preview.

https://www.batesfamilyblog.com/2018/06/keltons-late-mother.html?m=1

For those who didn’t watch the clip: he basically just briefly discussed that his mother died while giving birth to her youngest child, his father dedicated himself to raising their five children, it was the toughest thing they’ve been through as a family, and he’s very close with his dad as a result. This was all said during a part of the episode where he asks his dad for advice on how to ask Josie to court.

[crazysnark]

I just watched it live. My heart breaks for Kelton and his family. 13 is touch a tender age for kids and tothrow in the loss of a mother would be so traumatic. I do hope that this unfortunate situation gives insight to Kelton in regards to having Josie pump out one kid after another. 

 

 

[candygirl200413]

I give him mad props cause there was no reference to her having a heart for the lord and he did good touching on what he really liked about her.

[ophelia]

So she died while giving birth in a hospital? That is devastating. What kind of complications could that have been?

[Melissa1977]

40 minutes ago, ophelia said:

So she died while giving birth in a hospital? That is devastating. What kind of complications could that have been?

Nowadays people think that dying in a delivery is something from the past. But it still can happen. I heard of a woman having a heart attack while giving birth in a hospital. Another risk is to have an hemorrage, as Jessa had (fortunately it ended well for her).

This said, I recently read that rates of maternal deaths are high in US:

https://www.npr.org/2017/05/12/528098789/u-s-has-the-worst-rate-of-maternal-deaths-in-the-developed-world

 

[JemimaPuddle-Duck]

7 hours ago, TeaELSee said:

Wait.. if that is her 5th child after birth and she is alive I’m confused. Her obituary states she died during childbirth. I guess it doesn’t really matter but I  imagined the baby was in peril also. 

It is horrible and sad regardless but I find the wording odd.

”Kristy Dotson Balka, 39, wife of Michael H. Balka, died Tuesday, April 14, 2009 during the birth of her fifth child. “

Yeah, I thought about that too after seeing what Kelton said. I could have sworn there were four kids in that hospital photo, but I haven’t gone back to check. 

 

Okay, my first thought was that Kelton is on the far right in red. But perhaps that is someone else. If that’s Kelton on the left then the sister must be up on the bed on her knees or something because she wouldn’t be bigger than him. 

[TeaELSee]

1 hour ago, JemimaPuddle-Duck said:

Okay, my first thought was that Kelton is on the far right in red. But perhaps that is someone else. If that’s Kelton on the left then the sister must be up on the bed on her knees or something because she wouldn’t be bigger than him. 

I think that is Kelton on the far right.  Edited to add: I went back and double checked, (the picture is at the 33 second mark) and now I’m not sure, the video is all about his brother Carson so maybe he is the baby. 

Sorry, this is getting morbid.

That was heartbreaking to hear him talk about his Mom, what a shame. 

The US does have a growing maternal death problem. Serena Williams practically had to beg her Dr to listen to her after she had her baby this year. She had a history of pulmonary embolism and knew she was experiencing it again. Even with all that knowledge she still had trouble getting them to take her seriously, she could have died very easily.

[faraway]

I checked the photo again and now too believe it is after the birth of the youngest. Kelton is the oldest, then his sister, the two younger boys (they seem close in age) and after them there's quite a gap before the youngest sister. Maybe something happened soon after or a complication was overlooked.

I would find the wording "in childbirth" odd too if she died afterwards. Maybe it's fundie martyr lingo, who knows. 

I feel almost a little uncomfortable about how much they the dad made public on youtube about this...

 

[TeaELSee]

So, Josie wanted to skip courtship and head straight into engagement..

I never bought her, “I’m too young, we’re going to take this slow” BS. I really believe she will be married right after she turns 19. 

[JillyO]

7 hours ago, TeaELSee said:

The US does have a growing maternal death problem. Serena Williams practically had to beg her Dr to listen to her after she had her baby this year. She had a history of pulmonary embolism and knew she was experiencing it again. Even with all that knowledge she still had trouble getting them to take her seriously, she could have died very easily.

THIS. I recently read a heartbreaking article in (I believe) the New York Times about a young doctor who died from preeclampsia in after giving birth in the same hospital she worked at, because the doctors did not take her seriously until it was too late. One explanation that was given in the article for the shockingly high (and still increasing) maternal mortality rate is that the focus in the US has shifted to being solely on the baby's health. The US also has/had shockingly high fetal mortality rates compared to other developed countries, but these have actually gone down pretty steadily in the past years. At the expense of the mothers' health, apparently. If a doctor, who knows and is very friendly with the doctors taking care of her, can't get them to listen to her when she thinks something is wrong, then what chance does a regular woman have? I wish I could find the article again, because it was eye-opening and heartbreaking and absolutely terrifying.

ETA: Ha, found it! It's not the NYT, but ProPublica/NPR. I got some the details wrong (she was actually a neonatal nurse, not a doctor), but whatever. I highly recommend this article: https://www.propublica.org/article/die-in-childbirth-maternal-death-rate-health-care-system.

[BeccaGrim]

I actually really loved his courtship proposal to her.  It really does feel like he loves her. (Yes I know, beautiful proposal, sorry about the cult) and I thought his father gave him some good advice when he was shut down (actually I think properly by Gil when Josie was much younger) and told him basically to get himself together, find a goal, and be a good person.  I liked when he told her he loved the mole she hates. And he sees her determination.  

[candygirl200413]

Serena Williams for example almost died during childbirth too when she wasn't taking serious either. The New York times I think you're discussing @JillyO was a story on various black women who died and how trying to have a doula might help in limiting some of the issues. The USA has the highest maternal death rates of all developed nations.

[TeaELSee]

2 hours ago, BeccaGrim said:

actually really loved his courtship proposal to her.  It really does feel like he loves her. (Yes I know, beautiful proposal, sorry about the cult

I was just glad there was no singing involved.

[GreyhoundFan]

11 hours ago, JillyO said:

THIS. I recently read a heartbreaking article in (I believe) the New York Times about a young doctor who died from preeclampsia in after giving birth in the same hospital she worked at, because the doctors did not take her seriously until it was too late.

My mother almost died from preeclampsia when she was pregnant with me. She also worked at the hospital where I was born and her mother was head nurse. She barely made it. My aunt told me that when grandma came out to announce I was born, it was one of only two times anyone saw her cry. She just kept repeating that < my mom> survived. Oh, and that I didn't get my father's huge ears. This was in the U.S. in the mid-1960s.

[Ivycoveredtower]

On 6/7/2018 at 1:58 PM, Seculardaisy said:

Kelton discusses the loss of his mother in tonight’s episode. Here’s a preview.

https://www.batesfamilyblog.com/2018/06/keltons-late-mother.html?m=1

hoping the loss of his mother will make them extra cautious  in child birth and not push Josie to have multiple births 

On 6/8/2018 at 12:15 AM, ophelia said:

So she died while giving birth in a hospital? That is devastating. What kind of complications could that have been?

I heard a story a few months ago. mother had an anryism nobody knew about. it burst a few hours after giving birth probably from the stress of pushing and she died.  and yes she was in a hospital. 

another story I heard was a woman had a c-section and afterwards experienced internal bleeding that wasn't caught in time. these were both recent stories. 

[MsSaylor]

Watching The most recent episode. Way more screen time for Kelton than Ive seen so far. He kind of has a weird affect to me but I dont really get a bad vibe from him. I think hes just awkward. “I love your diligence” cringe

Appreciate Tori’s candidness. I am reserved about showing affection and feel super nervous about intimacy at the beginning of relationships, so I totally felt her on that. Bobby seems to roll with it and I think they’ll be aight. 

[candygirl200413]

Part of me thinks maybe he'll limit their kids and then part of me wonders if the first birth goes well without complications (which we obviously hope for) and he'll be like well that's fine we can have so many.

[Melissa1977]

Let's no forget that sometimes death is unpredictable. Kelton mom was, as far as we know, healthy and she only had 5 kids, not extremelly close in age. She was in a hospital. Probably whatever happened was unexpected. 

So, I don't think Josie should be scared for that experience. And I really hope Kelton is not scared, too. A frightened husband is the last a woman needs in a delivery.

Regarding how many kids they are having, I think that the younger the Bates girl is, the less kids she will have. 

[Ivycoveredtower]

3 hours ago, Melissa1977 said:

Let's no forget that sometimes death is unpredictable. Kelton mom was, as far as we know, healthy and she only had 5 kids, not extremelly close in age. She was in a hospital. Probably whatever happened was unexpected. 

So, I don't think Josie should be scared for that experience. And I really hope Kelton is not scared, too. A frightened husband is the last a woman needs in a delivery.

Regarding how many kids they are having, I think that the younger the Bates girl is, the less kids she will have. 

Why do you think that? Alyssa was married at 19 and already has three kids in the 4 years she was married and well she talks of stopping I highly doubt that will happen. and I think a healthy dose of fear is good for these fundy's to have instead of thinking they are invisible and pushing their body to the brink with baby after baby and multiple miscarriages. 

[VelociRapture]

17 minutes ago, Ivycoveredtower said:

Why do you think that? Alyssa was married at 19 and already has three kids in the 4 years she was married and well she talks of stopping I highly doubt that will happen. and I think a healthy dose of fear is good for these fundy's to have instead of thinking they are invisible and pushing their body to the brink with baby after baby and multiple miscarriages. 

I could be wrong, but I thought @Melissa1977was referring to the daughter’s place in the birth order, not her actual age upon marriage. So, by that thinking, Erin and Alyssa (as the eldest daughters currently reproducing) may end up having larger families then some or all of their younger sisters. 

[Melissa1977]

14 hours ago, Ivycoveredtower said:

Why do you think that? Alyssa was married at 19 and already has three kids in the 4 years she was married and well she talks of stopping I highly doubt that will happen. and I think a healthy dose of fear is good for these fundy's to have instead of thinking they are invisible and pushing their body to the brink with baby after baby and multiple miscarriages. 

@VelociRapture answered better than I could do.

The difference between Bates and other far-right conservatives was the amount of kids they had. As quiverful movement is declining and Bates kids are becoming mainstream, I predict it will be relatively easy for the middle and young ones to have little families, while staying fundie.

Anyway, Zach is the elder and is probably  using some kind of birth control. He can be an example for the young ones.

[Ivycoveredtower]

Kelton's job

and a picture of Josie and Kelton from the vow renewal. 

 

[RosyDaisy]

Love Josie's dress. For once a fundie bridesmaid's dress that doesn't look awful.