Chelsy and John's Wedding and the Aftermath

[sleepy_doggos]

Sure, praise your husband regularly otherwise he might cheat on you. Best advice ever Dad Bontrager, thanks

[halcionne]

"we are not losing a daughter"

yes you aaaaaarrrrrre

[fellowunfundie]

Two weeks honeymoon in a warmer climate? Did I hear that correctly?

[AllisonWndrland]

THey're going on a honeymoon! I am really surprised. 

Also, is there truly a need to keep announcing the damn date? 

[Destiny]

Are we seriously discussing the state of the father of the groom’s vas deferens (sp?) at a wedding? Is this real fucking life?

I’m following along from here because in a loud store.

[JermajestyDuggar]

At the double wedding, Marlin went on and on. But so did the grooms. I wonder who else will decide to speak next. A man of course....

[Captain Obvious]

I will never understand how fundie families, for all their religiosity, can never seem to understand the difference between a personal message (that you might have at a reception or family event) and a sermon/homily.

[hasunah]

I think in Stevehova's cult the object of worship isn't a cross  but a fixed vas deferens.

[fluffy]

WHAT IS HAPPENING? Handing the groom a microphone?! Where is the pastor, etc.? This has all the rhythms of a PBS phonathon. 

[JermajestyDuggar]

John's choked up.

[ViolaSebastian]

Can she not stand up on her own? Because she's leaning so heavily on him that it seems that way. 

[AliC]

3 minutes ago, fluffy said:

"One of my favorite authors John C. Maxwell..."

You heard John C. Maxwell as well? I could've sworn his middle name is Steven, though it's entirely possible I was mishearing Steven.

[usmcmom]

Vasectomy talk at a wedding - Tacky! I bet that wasn't on anybody's bingo cards. 

I made sweet potato pancakes just before this so I am full and sleepy. I just fessed up to my husband earlier about watching this:

"Whatta you want to do today?"

"Well you know that forum I follow? There's a livestream of a nutty fundie wedding. I have to watch it." 

"Hmm.  I'll watch with you."

Now he's googling the Bontrager's singing schedule.  We are even watching it on the tv through Apple TV. 

Also - Holy Cow! The father of the bride likes to hear himself talk.  There's a whole lot of smug in that church.  Wait. Now they are applauding him.  And John is talking.  

I just can't.  Somebody save me.  

 

[AliC]

3 minutes ago, fluffy said:

"One of my favorite authors John C. Maxwell..."

You heard John C. Maxwell as well? I could've sworn his middle name is Steven, though it's entirely possible I was mishearing Steven.

[helenprev]

I am struggling to understand what John is saying. I think it is basically 'Steve and Teri are great' though.

[seraaa]

5 minutes ago, fluffy said:

Could the dad have said some of this personal family crap ("George, where you at? Once from Georgia and now Arkansas...") at the rehearsal dinner?

Yes! This is very much rehearsal dinner chat

[freethemall]

Is it just me or is the groom trying to copy a feel, and the bride awkwardly trying to push his hand away. Dude, these people must be horny AF at their weddings.

[JermajestyDuggar]

Just now, fluffy said:

WHAT IS HAPPENING? Handing the groom a microphone?! Where is the pastor, etc.? This has all the rhythms of a PBS phonathon. 

It happened at the Bontrager double wedding too. A bunch of men going on and on and on while their women folk looked on adoringly. Barf.

[fellowunfundie]

For a bit of ironic context, I’m watching this at my still-fundie family’s home, and I keep having to tell my own reversal siblings, “be quiet! I can’t hear what is being said.”

[Captain Obvious]

Just now, AliC said:

You heard John C. Maxwell as well? I could've sworn his middle name is Steven, though it's entirely possible I was mishearing Steven.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_C._Maxwell

A few of the Bont kids have him listed as a fave author. Is that why Stud John was chosen? 

(I initially typed that as Bong kids. Should have left it, really.)

[clueliss]

So this is going to go on so long that 4 of the bridesmaids are seated.  But the rest are standing.  As are them groomsmen.  Huh?  Between that and the baby/toddler in arms.  

[courtlylove]

Four bridesmaids are sitting down ... does this mean they are pregnant?

[Captain Obvious]

HOLY CHRIST THEY'RE LETTING CHELSY SPEAK!

*sets fire to bingo card*

[fundiefan]

I have no idea what John is saying. I am watching on my laptop but listening via my phone & bluetooth speaker because my laptop speakers suck. Basically, I have a damn speaker right next to my head and I still can't make out what he is rambling on about.

 

[JermajestyDuggar]

Make this speech at the reception!