Jinger 33: Beauty: By God!

[NotQuiteMotY]

Honestly, all I'm getting from the picture posted above is that I want that circle skirt of Jinger's.

[allthegoodnamesrgone]

28 minutes ago, NotQuiteMotY said:

Honestly, all I'm getting from the picture posted above is that I want that circle skirt of Jinger's.

I want too look that good in a circle skirt. She really is all kinds of adorable. 

[Beermeet]

Ew on the Seewalds.  They really don't need to be involved with this couples baby making.  Ew.

[singsingsing]

4 minutes ago, Beermeet said:

Ew on the Seewalds.  They really don't need to be involved with this couples baby making.  Ew.

Did I miss something? I don't think the Seewalds ever said anything about Jinger and Jeremy's baby making. 

[WhyNotJulie]

Like others said, this was clearly a Jinger = spice joke again. However I'm thrown that ANYONE could look at how stunning (and tiny) Jinger looks in that photo and think to themselves "hmm, she must be 5 months pregnant!!". 

[WhyNotJulie]

Lots of questions about this photo. 

1. This is a family Thanksgiving. Why did she sign the note "-Michelle"? Why not "Mom"?

2. What could they possibly have upstairs that they don't want everyone to see?

3. Photo on the wall behind Jinger's head looks a lot like the Sugar & Spice photo Jeremy posted very recently. How often do they pose for this same photo??

[bananabread]

5 minutes ago, WhyNotJulie said:

2. What could they possibly have upstairs that they don't want everyone to see?

Probably not-yet-wrapped Christmas presents.

[Seculardaisy]

39 minutes ago, WhyNotJulie said:

Lots of questions about this photo. 

1. This is a family Thanksgiving. Why did she sign the note "-Michelle"? Why not "Mom"?

2. What could they possibly have upstairs that they don't want everyone to see?

 

Maybe she signed it Michelle because it wasn’t just her kids that were over. Amy and her husband were there and probably many other church/family guests and she’s not their mom. Maybe they didn’t want to clean a mess from having a ton of people up there. 

Seems fairly harmless by Duggar standards.

[Coconut Flan]

The house where I'm staying for Thanksgiving has a no guests upstairs unless invited policy.  There isn't a sign though.  It's mainly to keep the kids from heading off upstairs on their own and creating mayhem and disaster. 

[lawlifelgbt]

Here's my take on JinJer:

Even though Jinger still, according to the systems she grew up with and the way she was raised, isn't free in the way that fundies who "escape" are, it's still a huge improvement for her and any children to come.

We've seen how hard it is for fundie girls who do get away. And realistically, the odds of her escaping or marrying a guy who managed to fake his way past their extensive vetting process and has totally different ideas (yet still gets Jinger to like him), are next to nil.

Honestly, I feel a commonality with Jinger in some ways. I'm an educated young queer professional person, and although I didn't grow up fundie, I got a lot of family emotional abuse and bullying. I never felt, like her, that I was worth anything. The first person to tell me I was a capable, good person and he was proud of me, was my college professor. I was TWENTY. Even though I made it to college, paying for it, forcing a joint bank account, and the growth of late 2000s-early 2010s tech at the time, meant I rarely felt outside of my parents' control. It was an electronic leash. And my mom reinforced that I always messed up and wasn't good enough, every holiday when I had to go home.

When I was finishing college and would have to live with my parents again for several months when it ended, I "met" my wife online. I fell so hard and fast, before I even ever saw her face. She listened, and was kind. I had never experienced a relationship with someone of my preferred gender, or straight-up anyone I had mutual feelings for who was nice to me.

Then I went off to law school. I paid for that myself, and lived alone, but my parents kept control by threatening to yank my health insurance if I misbehaved, and often visiting me, since that school was closer than my undergraduate. During that year, I spent all breaks with my now-wife instead, and got engaged that January. That following September, she moved in with me. Married by February. I had never really controlled my own life before then.

My wife has a strong personality and can be bossy and particular. One might say that it was a situation of "meet the new boss, same as the old boss." I have never been really on my own or made entirely my own life decisions.

But on thinking about it, I know that the perfect person for me, or for anyone, doesn't exist, and that people like Jinger and I would really struggle to take leadership roles in our families. It's not for everyone. 

But as for me, it's enough that my spouse is better for me than my parents were, understands me more, and encourages me to feel better about myself and develop who I am. I'm working on things with counseling. I don't apologize to inanimate objects for bumping into them any more, and I can advocate better for my needs and opinions. I'd like Jinger to have that same option. At the same time, I just don't see myself as being able or willing to turn my whole life upside down, just to be completely on my own.

These changes in thinking and relationships have effects for the future, too. I've gone from "do and eat and act whatever/however you're told or else!" to "please put the dishes away/do you think we should shop for XYZ foods/what dates work for you to get off work to take a trip to see the inlaws?" Our kids will see that both parties in any kind of relationship can give their opinions and be heard, not shut down. And I do get the feeling Jeremy at least takes Jinger into consideration in a similar way. Did the Duggar parents ever do that? Their children, when they do have them (and I'm so happy Jinger isn't just a baby factory!) will learn differently than Jinger did. They'll teach their kids differently.

And these things add up. Sorry for the overly personal wall of text.

[Beermeet]

2 hours ago, singsingsing said:

Did I miss something? I don't think the Seewalds ever said anything about Jinger and Jeremy's baby making. 

It was a page or two ago, their comment with heart eyes emoji on the insta pic one.  I'm blanking.  Seemed like a baby anticipation comment to me.  If it wasn't,  my bad.  If it was, ew, I wouldn't like that at all.

[calimojo]

Also those spiral stairs could be a death trap for little kids or an older person, so perhaps they just wanted to keep those off limits.  I get it though,  I am not a great housekeeper and my upstairs is often not ready for public viewing.  When we have company over, I rarely encourage anyone to go upstairs.  It feels like an invasion of privacy to me.  The only time I allow visitors to go up stairs is if they are staying the night, which doesn't honestly happen very often any more. 

[Beermeet]

17 minutes ago, calimojo said:

Also those spiral stairs could be a death trap for little kids or an older person, so perhaps they just wanted to keep those off limits.  I get it though,  I am not a great housekeeper and my upstairs is often not ready for public viewing.  When we have company over, I rarely encourage anyone to go upstairs.  It feels like an invasion of privacy to me.  The only time I allow visitors to go up stairs is if they are staying the night, which doesn't honestly happen very often any more. 

Agree.  I live in a ranch style house and I close off the kids rooms when lots of kids are over.  It quickly turns into jumping on beds, slamming doors, get every toy out, let's wash the cat, what's your parents ( my) room like....stuff like that.  I keep 'em in the yard or main parts of the house.  For smaller gatherings? Mi casa es su casa.

[Jana814]

We have a 2 story house and a finished basement. When we have holiday dinners everyone stays on the main level. We also have a half bath. If that one is being used sometimes people go upstairs. But also upstairs we keep the bedroom doors shut just in case. 

[singsingsing]

Yeah, seems like basic crowd control to me. Signing it 'Michelle' also makes sense - after all, there were multiple women there who go by 'Mom'.

When I was a kid my parents used to have a Christmas Eve open house, and one year for some unfathomable reason all of the kids were left unsupervised in the basement, where we proceeded to have 'World War Three' by hiding behind furniture and whipping Christmas ornaments at each other. I have no idea how no one was injured. I can't recall getting in trouble over it. Sometimes I wonder what was going through my parents' minds, to be honest. But in conclusion, it's usually a good idea to keep all the kids on the same floor where the adults can see them.

[Beermeet]

2 minutes ago, Jana814 said:

We have a 2 story house and a finished basement. When we have holiday dinners everyone stays on the main level. We also have a half bath. If that one is being used sometimes people go upstairs. But also upstairs we keep the bedroom doors shut just in case. 

Oh, I miss basements!  Grew up with them in the north east.  All the fun was had there!  The best were the semi unfinished ones.  Then, we could paint and tie dye, let loose a bit.  Great set up when you have lots of kids!  Now, I'm in socal, so the yard is where it's at.  Still wish we had a basement, I want to dry herbs in it.

1 minute ago, singsingsing said:

 

When I was a kid my parents used to have a Christmas Eve open house, and one year for some unfathomable reason all of the kids were left unsupervised in the basement, where we proceeded to have 'World War Three' by hiding behind furniture and whipping Christmas ornaments at each other. I have no idea how no one was injured. I can't recall getting in trouble over it. Sometimes I wonder what was going through my parents' minds, to be honest. But in conclusion, it's usually a good idea to keep all the kids on the same floor where the adults can see them.

Oh yeah!  I remember quite a few out of hand basement fun moments.  Sometimes the patents just wanted to chill and it would be ON!  I don't blame them, we were contained,  "supervised" by the oldest and they would hear it stat if someone got hurt.  Different time.  Sigh.....

[nastyhobbitses]

2 hours ago, WhyNotJulie said:

2. What could they possibly have upstairs that they don't want everyone to see?

Josh.

[CreationMuseumSeasonPass]

9 minutes ago, nastyhobbitses said:

Josh.

Oh my god, I laughed so hard at this.

[motelmum]

35 minutes ago, nastyhobbitses said:

Josh

Thanks a lot @nastyhobbitses I was taking a mouth full of my drink. I nearly chocked. 

[Audrey2]

4 hours ago, WhyNotJulie said:

Lots of questions about this photo. 

1. This is a family Thanksgiving. Why did she sign the note "-Michelle"? Why not "Mom"?

The four main sister moms are all in the house. Each of them is Mom to the other, and together the fantastic four ran the house. Michelle is that shadowy creature that only comes out of her room when she and Jim Bob are done with "Hey, hey, hey". 

[SorenaJ]

Maybe their house is really messy upstairs and they didn't want people to see the mess. 

[Georgiana]

Upstairs is also mainly their private rooms, and there is nothing wrong with asking guests not to go into your bedrooms/kids bedrooms. I learned to close my door when company was over after finding folks had moseyed on into my room. They were just curious, but it was creepy and definitely crossed boundaries. For some reason, while people understand that an adult's bedroom is off limits unless personally invited in, they don't always extend that same courtesy to smaller (though still fully privacy conscious) humans. 

I'd imagine many of their guests might be curious about the kid rooms and want to take a look since they're "just" the kids' rooms, and this is probably a good way to just nip that in the bud.

[motelmum]

mmm, well that was an interesting typo on my part. That should of course said choked, not chocked. 

 

[cascarones]

Yes to all of the above, it also gives any family member who needs a break from the chaos a place to retreat. There are folks in my family who get overwhelmed easily and usually there's a code word indicating they're going to step away for a bit.

Or it might have to do with bedtime, though the Duggars seem to keep an up late, rise late schedule. My parents had a party on New Years Eve the year JonBenet Ramsey was murdered and I woke up to a man (my Dad's CO) opening my bedroom door. He was just looking for the other bathroom, but as a child near her age and scared of the case I went into full blown hysterics never seen before or since.

[Sky with diamonds]

8 hours ago, nastyhobbitses said:

Josh.

Is that where he has been hiding all that time?