Jinjer: Throwing Shade since April 9, 2017

[AlternativeVoice]

I'm not sure if anyone else picked it up, but Jeremy encouraging Jinger in the restaurant saying, "you can do more than you think you can", made me think that's not the first time he's told her that. Maybe she is constantly underestimating herself and he's just slowly taking on that role of encouraging her to see herself differently. Even though it came off child like (something I would say to my 6 year old), it gave me a flicker of hope...for what I don't know...but flicker of hope for something more than just pants wearing & sips of wine & the possibility of birth control. 

[QuiverFullofBooks]

On 7/3/2017 at 8:23 AM, SapphireSlytherin said:

Or both. Or Joy, Jinger, AND Jessa...

Jessa might get pregnant this month, based on her past spacing, but no way would she be ready to announce in time for this season's finale.

[MsSourPickle]

On 6/12/2017 at 8:28 AM, nst said:

With regards to the inlaws I don't have any - but I am assuming that not every in law will be every xmas will be at the Duggars.  I think Jinger is only lovey dovey with Mama V and Papa V - I don't think she could care less for say the Seewalds....plus all these inlaws have other families.  

 

The Vuolo's have their own Christmas Family Shindig so it will be interesting to see where Jinger spends Christmas this coming year, Remember J&J's wedding and reception? Michelle let her high school friend, is it Cindy ( a class act) Help with the wedding.  I also bet Cindy helped Michelle pick out her mother of the bride dress because Mo didn't look as tacky at Jin's wedding than she did at the others. Then it looked like they had some wonderful finger foods ( have to have meatballs for Grandma Vuolo and Family) so all in all Jingers wedding was more tasteful. The other Duggar Girls had their hoe-down barefoot cupcaked ice cream float receptions. What a bunch of yahoo's those Duggars are. I hope Jinger's life changes for the better with all the Vuolo's helping her along the way. I also hope Jimbob or Jessa don't start interfering in the marriage telling Jinger how she should live, behind Jeremy's back. Jessa is so pushy. 

[HereticHick]

I'm going to call it now: Jinger is going to make it to the new year without a bambino, but she will have one in the oven, but it will be announced after their anniversary in November.

[SapphireSlytherin]

1 hour ago, HereticHick said:

I'm going to call it now: Jinger is going to make it to the new year without a bambino, but she will have one in the oven, but it will be announced after their anniversary in November.

I'd be totally OK with this, actually. I was (intentionally) pregnant by my first anniversary, so I won't throw shade at that.  

[allthegoodnamesrgone]

6 hours ago, MsSourPickle said:

The Vuolo's have their own Christmas Family Shindig so it will be interesting to see where Jinger spends Christmas this coming year, Remember J&J's wedding and reception? Michelle let her high school friend, is it Cindy ( a class act) Help with the wedding.  I also bet Cindy helped Michelle pick out her mother of the bride dress because Mo didn't look as tacky at Jin's wedding than she did at the others. Then it looked like they had some wonderful finger foods ( have to have meatballs for Grandma Vuolo and Family) so all in all Jingers wedding was more tasteful. The other Duggar Girls had their hoe-down barefoot cupcaked ice cream float receptions. What a bunch of yahoo's those Duggars are. I hope Jinger's life changes for the better with all the Vuolo's helping her along the way. I also hope Jimbob or Jessa don't start interfering in the marriage telling Jinger how she should live, behind Jeremy's back. Jessa is so pushy. 

Joy had hors d'oeuvre and an indoor reception as well.  Cindy also helped with this one since no sisters were around to help Joy like she helped them.  

Jessa has mellowed out since having kids, I don't see her interfering with Jinger's life, JB oh yeah, but Jessa has way to much going on with 2 little ones to worry about Jinger wearing pants or when she'll have a baby.  

[Jelatin]

Hi Longtime sporadic lurker, first-time poster. I'm pretty sure this hasn't been mentioned before (at least recently), but has anyone  watched the interview at www.youtube.com/watch?v=DTI-WitUXUI (hopefully I broke the link correctly)?

This interview took place shortly after the births of Israel and Spurgeon. Only Jana, Jinger, and the TLC interviewer are present, and at 1:22 the interviewer asks Jana and Jinger about their own plans for motherhood. Around 1:51 Jinger says she hopes to someday have what Jill and Jessa have, but then at 1:54 she says "It's like, okay, I'm gonna do this -- or I might, you know, establish a few other things on my own" (to which Jana goes "Yup").

Evidence that Jinger (maybe along with Jana) wants to put off having kids until she's reached some of her own goals first?

 

[Bethella]

26 minutes ago, Jelatin said:

I'm pretty sure this hasn't been mentioned before (at least recently), but has anyone  watched the interview at www.youtube.com/watch?v=DTI-WitUXUI (hopefully I broke the link correctly)?

Welcome @Jelatin! You don't need to break the links anymore.

[JemimaPuddle-Duck]

It sounds like she meant she might do things her sisters have done or sometimes she might do things her own way, establish her own parenting style. That was my impression anyway. 

[VelociRapture]

12 hours ago, SapphireSlytherin said:

I'd be totally OK with this, actually. I was (intentionally) pregnant by my first anniversary, so I won't throw shade at that.  

Our first would have been due right around Halloween last year - about a week before our first anniversary. We lost that one, but our daughter arrived six weeks premature in early December... two days shy of us being married for 13 months.

Both planned. Both dearly wanted. So I honestly have zero issues with other couples having kids immediately either. I do wish these Fundie couples would wait a few months just to get to know each other a bit better privately.

18 hours ago, MsSourPickle said:

SNIP SNIP SNIP

Then it looked like they had some wonderful finger foods ( have to have meatballs for Grandma Vuolo and Family) so all in all Jingers wedding was more tasteful. The other Duggar Girls had their hoe-down barefoot cupcaked ice cream float receptions. What a bunch of yahoo's those Duggars are. I hope Jinger's life changes for the better with all the Vuolo's helping her along the way. I also hope Jimbob or Jessa don't start interfering in the marriage telling Jinger how she should live, behind Jeremy's back. Jessa is so pushy. 

Just a FYI - there is absolutely nothing wrong with having the type of reception that any of the Duggars have had. Many posters here have stated that dessert only receptions are pretty common in certain areas of the US (think cake and punch receptions.) Most of them seem to have avoided hosting receptions during normal meal hours, so I honestly see nothing wrong with their receptions. The only big responsibility they have as hosts is to be sure their guests know what to expect ahead of time so everyone can plan accordingly and everyone will be comfortable.

(So sayeth someone who had a full sit down dinner and a cocktail hour at her semi-formal night wedding.)

And I agree with @allthegoodnamesrgone- Jessa has two kids under two. She likely doesn't have time to micromanage anyone else's life at this point, but especially not the life of a sister married to a take charge guy and who lives hundreds of miles away.

[Jelatin]

Thanks, @Bethella! Like I said, I'm a sporadic lurker, so I may not be up-to-date on all the rules haha.

[ThunderRolls]

I do feel like standards for weddings have gotten a little out of control, and I don't see anything wrong with a cake and punch or cocktail receptions. That being said....knowing the Duggars and their grifting ways, it just seemed so cheap for them to have a parking lot reception with over 1,000 guests (IIRC Jill and Jessa's weddings were like this). It came across (to my cynical brain) as a way to maximize gifts without showing appreciation for their guests. I have zero idea if they expected everyone to bring gifts, but if they did, then it seemed like they cheaped out. 

 

[BeccaGrim]

I loved how he said she was so smart and they showed them studying together and she corrected him, knew the word before he did and then ordered better than he did in the restaurant.  And in the TH he said that they'd have a family in the next five years.  He may have taken her on a different path. 

[singsingsing]

Jinger also said that babies could be 'right around the corner' for her. And I agree that it's nice that Jeremy encourages her and compliments her for being smart, but damn is that a low bar to meet.

[Henk12]

With Jill and Jessa I felt like it was always obvious that they were going to pop out as many babies as they could right away. And I think Joy will do the same. But Jinger is harder for me to guess. Part of me truly believes she is waiting because her and Jeremy want to have some alone time before endless diapers and pregnancies. But maybe she's just got average fertility and it's taking a little while for her to get pregnant. 

Teenagers are crazy fertile and need to know it. I got pregnant at 17 (that was definitely a surprise) and then got pregnant again at 19 on purpose. It happened the first try. (We were married and financially stable, I swear.) And then when I was 22 we started trying to get pregnant for our daughter and it took three months. Even though I logically knew that it can take a healthy couple a year to conceive, I have to admit that I panicked when it didn't happen right away. I know that's completely ridiculous but I can't help how I felt lol

I will always tell my kids how incredibly easy it is to get pregnant but I do worry that it will hurt them when they are older if they don't get pregnant on the first try. But I'd rather not be a grandma before I'm 40. 

Also watching Jinger always weirds me out a bit. We're the same age. I was born on December 16th and I'm pretty sure she was born on the 21st (same day as my daughter.) She just seems so ...child like. It's hard to believe we're the same age. I can't imagine her or Joy having babies right now. I'm sure they will be good moms but they just seem so much younger.

[louisa05]

2 hours ago, VelociRapture said:

I do wish these Fundie couples would wait a few months just to get to know each other a bit better privately.

Just a FYI - there is absolutely nothing wrong with having the type of reception that any of the Duggars have had. Many posters here have stated that dessert only receptions are pretty common in certain areas of the US (think cake and punch receptions.) Most of them seem to have avoided hosting receptions during normal meal hours, so I honestly see nothing wrong with their receptions. The only big responsibility they have as hosts is to be sure their guests know what to expect ahead of time so everyone can plan accordingly and everyone will be comfortable.

I agree that it is a bit different for the fundie couples who have not even been alone together prior to the wedding and often known each other for less than a year. Marriage is a huge adjustment for them as compared to most people who have dated and spent significant time together, possibly already live together and typically known each other much longer. An immediate pregnancy like Jill's has to make the adjustment even more difficult. 

As for the wedding receptions...I have been to two cake and punch receptions held at dinner time. Super tacky. A friend of mine had an hour and a half long ceremony (I swear that half the damn Bible was read to us) that began at 4 p.m. followed by the world's slowest receiving line (not even sure what went wrong there, but I was stuck in it as a member of the wedding party). Then they took more pictures.  The cake and punch was served at nearly 7 p.m. People were ready for dinner and got one inch square pieces of cake, two chalky little mints and about four peanuts. No. Just no. If they wanted to be that cheap, that wedding should have been done by 2:30 and the cake served by 4 and we all should have been out of there by dinner time. The other one started early enough, but the photographer was not just a photographer, she was an "artist". And the bride didn't want to see the groom before the wedding. So they spent nearly 3.5 hours after the wedding doing pictures while the guests sat around doing nothing in the church hall. By the time the pictures were done and the couple showed up to start the reception, nearly everyone had left and it was dinner time. 

But if you get it done between lunch and dinner time and make sure the guests know what they are getting (put "dessert reception" on the invites), then it is perfectly okay. Except maybe let people have a whole piece of cake. 

I've also been to two evening weddings that had "dinner" on the invite, but the food was just appetizers suitable for a cocktail hour and everyone left starving. Also, not cool. 

[JillyO]

5 minutes ago, louisa05 said:

But if you get it done between lunch and dinner time and make sure the guests know what they are getting (put "dessert reception" on the invites), then it is perfectly okay. Except maybe let people have a whole piece of cake.

That, and also maybe don't have your reception in a parking lot with nowhere to sit. And maybe avoid ice cream on a cold November day when your reception is outdoors.

[ThunderRolls]

Wanted to add another weird reception scenario that I personally experienced and have since found out is not all that uncommon (but I find it in questionable taste). Two college friends got married to each other and my husband and I received an invitation. There was the main invitation with the ceremony information and then a smaller card with the reception information (location and time to arrive - which did seem kind of late in the evening). There was no response card or anything. I thought it was odd but that maybe it had been accidentally left out.  Our friends asked us in person if we were planning on attending and we verbalized yes so I figured everything was fine. Well, we get to the reception, and the dinner was over - my husband and I realized we were on the B-list of guests! The wedding had 500+ people. I honestly would have preferred to not have been invited at all versus realizing we weren't important enough for a meal (but good enough for a gift). No joke, the entire middle school cheerleading squad my friend (the bride) coached was invited to the actual reception.

[Snarkylark]

5 minutes ago, ThunderRolls said:

Wanted to add another weird reception scenario that I personally experienced and have since found out is not all that uncommon (but I find it in questionable taste). Two college friends got married to each other and my husband and I received an invitation. There was the main invitation with the ceremony information and then a smaller card with the reception information (location and time to arrive - which did seem kind of late in the evening). There was no response card or anything. I thought it was odd but that maybe it had been accidentally left out.  Our friends asked us in person if we were planning on attending and we verbalized yes so I figured everything was fine. Well, we get to the reception, and the dinner was over - my husband and I realized we were on the B-list of guests! The wedding had 500+ people. I honestly would have preferred to not have been invited at all versus realizing we weren't important enough for a meal (but good enough for a gift). No joke, the entire middle school cheerleading squad my friend (the bride) coached was invited to the actual reception.

That's what our reception was like. We had a sit down dinner for close family and friends because we had to set a limit for dinner but then opened up the reception to everyone we had invited to the wedding. 

[louisa05]

2 minutes ago, Snarkylark said:

That's what our reception was like. We had a sit down dinner for close family and friends because we had to set a limit for dinner but then opened up the reception to everyone we had invited to the wedding. 

Ah...but you limited dinner to the people closest to you. @ThunderRolls's friend clearly did not limit in the same way if the entire middle school cheerleading squad was there for dinner. I'm thinking your guests had no reason to be appalled. 

[Daisy0322]

7 minutes ago, ThunderRolls said:

 Well, we get to the reception, and the dinner was over

My mouth dropped open reading that! I've never heard of this happening before but I can't believe it, I went to a wedding where the wedding party had plated steak dinners and the guests had to go though a buffet with fried chicken as the only option. I thought that was rude! (Not that there's anything wrong with either plated or buffet I just feel like you should eat the same thing your serving your guests.) 

 

[backyard sylph]

7 minutes ago, Snarkylark said:

That's what our reception was like. We had a sit down dinner for close family and friends because we had to set a limit for dinner but then opened up the reception to everyone we had invited to the wedding. 

Peolpe must do as they like, and based on the number of people you're involving, where it is, and lots of other details, but seeing @ThunderRolls experience, I think my choice would have been to have only the rehearsal/family dinner before the wedding, with a reception for all invited guests to enjoy after the wedding. Not the cheerleading squad, etc, then the rest.

[Snarkylark]

Well maybe she was really close to her cheerleading squad! Lol or maybe she promised them they could come if certain conditions were met, etc. some coaches are very involved in coaching and the kids they coach. Idk, to each his own, I guess. Any time you only invite certain people and not all someone is bound to be offended. We knew that, but again- had to set a limit. 

[2manyKidzzz]

There's no accounting for taste.

[ThunderRolls]

42 minutes ago, Snarkylark said:

That's what our reception was like. We had a sit down dinner for close family and friends because we had to set a limit for dinner but then opened up the reception to everyone we had invited to the wedding. 

I appreciate your response stating this is what you did - perhaps the way you went about it was in better taste than my friends. With the rather large amount of people and the cheerleading squad, it just seemed like a round about way to get more gifts without paying for another plate of food. T

When it comes to limiting part of the wedding to close family and friends, I'm used to seeing that done with the ceremony being small and then having a dinner/reception later on that is open to more people.