Jana's Future 4 - Family Ties

[Icea]

I'm still convinced Bin brought Jeremy along for Jana, but that he was more interested in Jinger or that Jessa pushed them together. In one of the episodes (can't remember which one, but I guess it doesn't really matter since TLC reused footage at least 4 times during the last season) Bin talked about Jeremy and how he "thought maybe he would be a  good match with one of Jessa's sisters"*. The only sisters who were of age and single at the time were Jana and Jinger, and Jeremy is much closer in age with Jana than Jinger.

If Bin had thought Jeremy and Jinger would hit it off, surely he would've mentioned that instead of saying "one of Jessa's sisters". 

 

 

*paraphrasing, I don't remember the exact words

[VeganCupcake]

18 hours ago, AnnaRuk09 said:

I think you nailed it. Jana's the most cautious out of her sisters and it makes complete sense that she will wait and will continue to do so. I agree that Jana will not get married from just a crush but rather from a life changing divine intervention where every bit of godly inclination within her will tell her it's the one. They say the patient get the best love story and the best are saved for last. I hope it's true for her. 

 

19 hours ago, PainfullyAware said:

While her sisters seem carried away by fairytale endings and eager to believe that their own relationships had romantic beginnings (that in some cases seemed like a crush mistaken for star crossed love), I think Jana is not going to fall in love with the idea of love. 

I think y'all are right! When it comes to marriage Im waiting it out like Jana. I don't believe in "THE ONE" but I also don't believe in settling. Slow and steady wins the race. And honestly if no one ever comes along that I like enough, I am fine with not getting married. 

My sister is terrified of being alone, so even though she's still quite young she has locked herself into a serious relationship with someone she doesn't even like very much. And shutting herself off from the possibility of meeting other options. I could never be like that. Being stuck with someone I don't like sounds way worse than being alone. 

[singsingsing]

3 hours ago, Icea said:

If Bin had thought Jeremy and Jinger would hit it off, surely he would've mentioned that instead of saying "one of Jessa's sisters". 

Not sure why that would necessarily mean he had Jana in mind, though. He just thought it would be cool if Jeremy married one of Jessa's sisters because he liked Jeremy and then Jeremy would basically be family. Lots of people think that way, not just fundies. Jessa had three single sisters of courting age, it could've been any one of them. 

I can't imagine Jeremy with Jana. Jeremy and Jinger seem pretty compatible. Jana seems like she'd be looking for a completely different kind of guy and wouldn't even be particularly interested in Jeremy.

[HarleyQuinn]

7 hours ago, Rachel333 said:

Who confirmed the courtship with the Holt girl?

I think "Alice" said something about it? 

[Icea]

57 minutes ago, singsingsing said:

Not sure why that would necessarily mean he had Jana in mind, though. He just thought it would be cool if Jeremy married one of Jessa's sisters because he liked Jeremy and then Jeremy would basically be family. Lots of people think that way, not just fundies. Jessa had three single sisters of courting age, it could've been any one of them. 

I can't imagine Jeremy with Jana. Jeremy and Jinger seem pretty compatible. Jana seems like she'd be looking for a completely different kind of guy and wouldn't even be particularly interested in Jeremy.

Of course it could, but there was just something about the way he said it (or if it was his body language) that instantly made me think that he had a particular sister in mind. If that had been Jinger, he definately would've said that in the TH.

I agree though that Jeremy and Jana would not have been a good fit.

[Fundie Bunny]

1 hour ago, HarleyQuinn said:

I think "Alice" said something about it? 

So did cousin Amy. Engaged he was. Arranged marriage with less makeup I think

[HarleyQuinn]

I don't even think it was an actual courtship, weren't they like 14? I think Alice referred to it as being "betrothed." That was during the "sin in the camp" thing. 

[ihaveanexamintwodays]

2 hours ago, Icea said:

Of course it could, but there was just something about the way he said it (or if it was his body language) that instantly made me think that he had a particular sister in mind. If that had been Jinger, he definately would've said that in the TH.

I agree though that Jeremy and Jana would not have been a good fit.

I suppose it's entirely possible he introduced Jeremy to the fam with designs to set him up with Jana, but I just don't think so haha. I don't agree that Ben would've straight up said "Jinger" if that's what he intended either - I think he and Jessa have mastered the play-dumb-and-fake-coy-smile-for-the-cameras-because-they-know-something-we-don't-know expression + soundbites, *especially* whenever asked about courtships since they know that's the big money-maker. Also, Jessa has mentioned several times that she'd try to set Jinger up with someone. Just my opinion though haha, Ben does tend to think he's smarter than he actually is. 

[justmy2cents]

3 hours ago, ihaveanexamintwodays said:

Jessa has mentioned several times that she'd try to set Jinger up with someone.

Actually I think she said that she had tried to set up her siblings (not JInger specifically) but that they weren't listening to her, or something like that.

[SassyPants]

LOL that a 2nd generation Duggar was setting up another Duggar

Isn't that JB's main job? 

I'm still wondering how the heck Ben made the cut. He was basically a teenager stalking Jessa.

[Mr. Pink]

Am I remembering correctly that Jana regularly sleeps with some of the younger girls? Is she the only one of the older girls to do that? (I guess there's no way of knowing)

I may be projecting my own experience way too much, but I had trouble bonding with my babies right away, and sleeping with them goes a long way in 'connecting' us in a deeply meaningful way. I don't know if that's weird, or if I'm the only one but I feel like Jana sleeping with the little ones nightly could be indicative of a really strong bond. Like, it might not even be that she's just wanting to 'protect' them from anything--she could just love them and be so strongly attached that she doesn't want to leave right now.

[eveandadam]

1 hour ago, SassyPants said:

I'm still wondering how the heck Ben made the cut. He was basically a teenager stalking Jessa.

I suspect JB got panicked that nobody from their circles wanted/dared to court one of his daughters, so Ben came along who was basically JB's only chance to save ratings of the show (aka a daughter in a courtship). Jessa was the first to enter a courtship. Jill's only came 6 months or so later.

I would say if Derick had come along earlier to court Jill, JB would have never said yes to Ben courting Jessa. Maybe Joy in a few years time.

 

Ben was a "fill-in". But right now he is growing up to be a decent man, at least it looks like it, so fingers crossed for Jessa.

I still think he and Joy would make a cute couple, though.

[VelociRapture]

@Mr. PinkIf I remember correctly, the four elder daughters shared beds with younger children (or at least Jana and Jill did.) I think there were trundle beds or something. 

Jill seemed especially close to her buddy group, but that didn't stop her from marrying. What you suggested is completely possible, but I do think she's simply waiting for God to send her that special guy.

[singsingsing]

26 minutes ago, eveandadam said:

I suspect JB got panicked that nobody from their circles wanted/dared to court one of his daughters, so Ben came along who was basically JB's only chance to save ratings of the show (aka a daughter in a courtship). Jessa was the first to enter a courtship. Jill's only came 6 months or so later.

I would say if Derick had come along earlier to court Jill, JB would have never said yes to Ben courting Jessa. Maybe Joy in a few years time.

I'm pretty sure Jill and Derick started 'talking' around the same time Jessa and Ben started courting, so this doesn't make much sense. I can't see JB panicking that no one in his circle wanted to court his daughters, either - that's definitely not the impression I got. I think people twist themselves into knots trying to figure out Jim Bob's motivation for letting Ben marry Jessa because they're viewing Ben through their own lenses, but you have to put yourself in Jim Bob Duggar's shoes. Jim Bob was also a teenager when he got married. Jim Bob prioritizes having a 'ministry mindset' over a steady job. Jim Bob probably liked the idea of a young, malleable, eager-to-please son-in-law over whom he could exercise significant control. I don't think Ben was a placeholder or a compromise at all, I think he was exactly the sort of guy JB wanted for his daughters.

[QuiverFullofBooks]

3 hours ago, VelociRapture said:

@Mr. PinkIf I remember correctly, the four elder daughters shared beds with younger children (or at least Jana and Jill did.) I think there were trundle beds or something. 

Jill seemed especially close to her buddy group, but that didn't stop her from marrying. What you suggested is completely possible, but I do think she's simply waiting for God to send her that special guy.

I just reread the girls' book, and they say (on the very first page) that Jana and Jill slept in double beds with Jordyn and Josie, while the other girls had twin or "youth" beds.

[shiverful]

11 hours ago, SassyPants said:

I'm still wondering how the heck Ben made the cut. He was basically a teenager stalking Jessa.

I think that his age and immaturity was perfect for Jim Bob. That meant that he could control both he and Jessa. 

Jim Bob let him get to know and court his daughter only to be able to set certain rules - you have to be able to support her, and that means working for me and living in my house... etc. 

Jinger were older when she married and married a far older guy, and look how that turned out: living far away, wearing pants and shorts and ick! 

I think that this is the main reason for him to allow Joy to court and marry at such a young age - the fact that she and Austin still are quite young makes them easier to control. He constantly whines about how hard it is to give away his daughters, but I think he sees a huge advantage in marrying them off to someone young, not someone who's had their own lives and careers for several years.

[VeganCupcake]

22 hours ago, singsingsing said:

I can't imagine Jeremy with Jana. Jeremy and Jinger seem pretty compatible. Jana seems like she'd be looking for a completely different kind of guy and wouldn't even be particularly interested in Jeremy.

Lol true. No way Jana would want someone so high maintenance and vain like Jeremy. 

14 hours ago, Mr. Pink said:

Like, it might not even be that she's just wanting to 'protect' them from anything--she could just love them and be so strongly attached that she doesn't want to leave right now.

Agree  Jana probably feels attached to the littlest girls like they're her own daughters. She has literally raised them. Me-chelle admitted to passing off the babies as soon as they're weaned! How old do babies get weaned, like 9 months?? 

[OyToTheVey]

15 minutes ago, VeganCupcake said:

Lol true. No way Jana would want someone so high maintenance and vain like Jeremy. 

Agree  Jana probably feels attached to the littlest girls like they're her own daughters. She has literally raised them. Me-chelle admitted to passing off the babies as soon as they're weaned! How old do babies get weaned, like 9 months?? 

Michelle said she passed them off to a buddy at 6 months old. So Jana has raised a lot of 6 month plus babies. 

[SassyPants]

Ah...maybe Jana does not want her daddy controlling her future husband's (and her) life? Perhaps all the men that daddy has proposed are Ben types, and Jana's heart has told her NOPE.  Now we might be getting somewhere.

[Hmmm_idolatry]

Does this mean that Jana's roommates are literally all a bunch of young children?  Or does she get her own room?  I'm still hoping that she and JD pack their bags and flee in the night.  

[melon]

Jana's roommates are her much younger sisters,Johannah,Jennifer,Jordyn and Josie.

Jana is 20 years older than her youngest sister.

Wow.

Babies get weaned at varying ages.Michelle had those girls taking care of the little girls from an early age.

But,I remember the J'slaves,mostly Jana and JIll....JInger and Jessa  too....taking care of their little sisters.

On one episode JB was dressing up as a Wiseman,Jennifer was terrified when he put the beard on...he kind of laughed and tried to pick her up,if I remember correctly,and she cried for Dill...(Jill) not MIchelle.

 

[VelociRapture]

6 hours ago, VeganCupcake said:

Agree  Jana probably feels attached to the littlest girls like they're her own daughters. She has literally raised them. Me-chelle admitted to passing off the babies as soon as they're weaned! How old do babies get weaned, like 9 months?? 

It depends. I stopped nursing my daughter at three months. I intended to nurse at least a year - but a premature birth and NICU stay really took a toll on me emotionally and mentally. I stuck it out until a month after her first round of vaccinations (at 2 months) and then called it quits. 

I believe WHO recommends breastfeeding exclusively at least six months and then continue to be nursed (with complimentary foods) to two years or older. But it's just a recommendation and sometimes things just don't work out.

[HarleyQuinn]

Jana having to share a room with 4 other girls that are age 11 and under is depressing as hell. 

Can't JB let her go move in with Laura or something? Accountabilibuddy? 

[candygirl200413]

I forget, did Grandma Duggar have her own room at the TTH? Cause Jana could move there?

[Iamtheway]

On 2017-05-23 at 0:24 PM, Karma said:

The DFO fb page has posted a photo of Jana holding a baby (presumably Henry), saying she loves holding her nephews when they visit.  Yeah, she's on the phone, and the baby looks like it's asleep or smothered.  Terrible photo.  Sometimes you wonder where their brains are, posting pics like this.

She's on the phone and basically ignoring the baby. I'd say those are two signs of a Duggar courting. 

On 2017-05-25 at 11:32 AM, MadeItOut said:

...I can't help it, I'm still hoping for at least one woman strong in herself coming out of that house regardless of how long it may take.

Jennie for sure. She seems over it. I hope she's quietly planning her escape.