Bates Family Part 15 - Bumps, Births and Babies

[theinvisiblegirl]

15 hours ago, choralcrusader8613 said:

JB and Michelle have said in their books that they follow those rules, but who knows how much those are followed in reality?

I don't recall them talking about the menstrual cycle rules in their books. I only remember them talking about the other Leviticus teaching about sex after birth - 40 days for a boy and 80 days for a girl. (I've read Leviticus for research purposes. It's not a fun book at all. 0/10 do not recommend.)

[JermajestyDuggar]

2 hours ago, SassyPants said:

You have to infuse some common sense.

If one really was that much of a vigilante, one would NEVER put a child (or themself) into a moving car, BUT common sense and reality means most of us must use modes of transportation other than our feet.

Living in the world is not risk free and we all will die.

If your child is barfy, screaming and at risk of aspiration when they are rear facing in the car, you probably need to turn that seat around- it's just as safe as risking aspiration or an accident.

Been there, done that.

That's why I said earlier in the thread that I'm lucky I don't have to drive my baby much. We walk a lot or he stays home. But I know not everyone is lucky in that way. So I am fine with people turning their kid before 2. I get it. But it always makes me roll my eyes when people make high and mighty snap judgments of other parents when they know nothing of the situation. 

[JMO]

20 hours ago, Casserole said:

 

I doubt they ever abstain. "Sex is only for reproducing" but do you think JB or Gil could keep it in their pants for 9 months x 17/19 pregnancies? That's 13 years. No way. Ya know, just in case Michelle or Kelly have an extra uterus lying around to impregnate. Can't be too sure. 

Considering Michelle always discusses her friend that told her to always be available for her husband "even if you are big pregnant" and tired from chasing littles all day..... I'm thinking there is no stopping JB.  They also discuss how good it is for the couples relationship. 

[theinvisiblegirl]

2 minutes ago, JMO said:

Considering Michelle always discusses her friend that told her to always be available for her husband "even if you are big pregnant" and tired from chasing littles all day..... I'm thinking there is no stopping JB.  They also discuss how good it is for the couples relationship. 

And wasn't that what people speculated made Josh cheat? That Anna wasn't "available" enough?

Ugh these people make me fucking sick. They really do.

[HereticHick]

Finally, a fundy woman who is willing to actually chop off her split ends:

 

[Exjw2015deed]

2 minutes ago, HereticHick said:

Finally, a fundy woman who is willing to actually chop off her split ends:

 

Wow short hair and leggings. Nothing to snark on she looks good.

[TShirtsLongSkirts]

4 minutes ago, Exjw2015deed said:

Wow short hair and leggings. Nothing to snark on she looks good.

She looks great. I wonder how the other Gothardites will react to it. Isn't it one of his directives or whatever that women should have long wavy hair (and all that bullcrap about countenance)? 

[Exjw2015deed]

20 minutes ago, Exjw2015deed said:

Wow short hair and leggings. Nothing to snark on she looks good.

After I wrote this post, I dropped my phone and my nose started bleeding. Sign from the universe.

[VelociRapture]

17 minutes ago, TShirtsLongSkirts said:

She looks great. I wonder how the other Gothardites will react to it. Isn't it one of his directives or whatever that women should have long wavy hair (and all that bullcrap about countenance)? 

As far as I know yes. Anna Duggar has had shorter hair like Alyssa's before though, so I don't think it'd be a really major issue. 

[formergothardite]

29 minutes ago, TShirtsLongSkirts said:

She looks great. I wonder how the other Gothardites will react to it. Isn't it one of his directives or whatever that women should have long wavy hair (and all that bullcrap about countenance)? 

It is Gothard's fetish to have women look like that, but even when I was in ATI I had hair shorter than Alyssa's and it wasn't a big deal. 

[nastyhobbitses]

37 minutes ago, HereticHick said:

Finally, a fundy woman who is willing to actually chop off her split ends:

 

I know that complimenting a Bates brings a storm of "OMG THIS IS NOT A FANSITE HOW VERY DARE YOU", but she looks very cute and I want those leggings (for reals, I think my style aesthetic is Alyssa Bates Webster right now, since Cate Blanchett and Lupita Nyong'o are a tad unattainable). Alyssa looks very happy, healthy, and while I fervently wish she'd fully break out of fundiedom and stop dressing her daughter like the Toddlers and Tiaras costume department threw up all over the poor mite, I'm glad that she's living her life in her own way and doing her own thing.

[mango_fandango]

I've just seen the latest photo on the Bates Instagram featuring Josie. The skirts are getting shorter, I can see knee.

I also reckon that the younger Bates girls have a better fashion sense than the younger Duggar girls. With the duggars it seems to be a case of "grab any old t shirt, any old pair of leggings and bung a dress on top." The outfits on the Bates girls seem to be more coordinated. 

And yeah, awesome leggings. 

[JermajestyDuggar]

1 hour ago, HereticHick said:

Finally, a fundy woman who is willing to actually chop off her split ends:

 

Wow. Leggings as pants. I know non-fundies who don't even consider them pants! 

Of course I consider them to be pants because you know, comfy....

[19 cats and counting]

I don't consider leggings pants (then again I don't get wearing workout clothes outside the gym).

As for Allie's wardrobe--- yes she's got some frilly things (and the giant headflowers), but it's not straight off the Toddlers and Tiaras set.  I've seen pics of her in pants.  She's at an age where she's just going to be starting to show clothing preferences (my niece at that age liked graphic shirts and would point to whatever is on her shirt).

Being a proud auntie (who faithfully does her job of spoiling nieces), I know what is fashionable for girls that age (younger niece is 6 months older than Allie).  I don't see her wardrobe as any different than most girls that age.

Now Brooklyn Paine will be dressed like a pageant girl.  And she may even get a set of fake pigtails to go along with the giant headflowers.

[SassyPants]

7 hours ago, SilverBeach said:

My DD is thirty one. I don't  remember ever carrying her rear facing (may have done so, I just don't recall), nor anyone telling me to make sure to do so when I left the hospital with her. Safety precautions change for the better.

The inability to face the direction opposite of travel without becoming sick is a real medical condition. 

I never had this problem, but I thought maybe there was something that could be given to the baby so rear facing travel would be OK. I would think that the doctor feels that the risk of being sick vs. the risk of front facing is at least the same or maybe worse, hence the recommendation. I would ask my peds this directly and would then try to be comfortable with the advice I was given. 

Our daughter is 29 and she rearfaced once- and it was not pretty. From that point on, day 6 of life, she was forward facing. She is also the mom to the little barfing granddaughter.

I did rear face my 25 yo son for as long as he was in an infant car seat. I don't think the car seats meant for bigger babies even worked in the rear facing facing position 25 years ago.

[actuallyjessica]

Isn't it nice how times change and research is compiled to ensure that things like car seats are safer? My mother (who is 50) was carried home on my grandmothers lap as they travelled in a car that had no seat belts.

Hopefully one day ERF will become something just as normal as seatbelts!

[Melissa1977]

About Alyssa's picture in leggings, I don't think it praises Kelly at all. Yes there are ATI woman who wear shorts, but leggings with a short T-shirt are Nike! 

But for me the most shocking part is when she says that it takes too much time to be ready when you have a little kid. Didn't she realised before? Really? It's not that she has been living with childless people!

Alyssa, enjoy your (obviously nice) life. Enjoy your daughter. And take your time before having more babies. Maybe you don't know, but having few kids is great.

[elliha]

Here in Sweden doctors say that children under 2 cannot be carsick and they don't seem to get carsick from what I have seen. I have never heard of a carsick baby. If they are over 2 and carsick they still say that they should not be turned and instead keep the cars as cold as you can stand, neither give too little or too much food and no screens or books. My daughter has thrown up twice in the car after she turned 3, once she refused to eat breakfast and then 1,5 hours later ate a lot of food at a gas station and then threw half of it up. The other time she was drawing in the car and it probably made her carsick. I am and always was very carsick myself so I expected her to be carsick but she doesn't seem to have that much of a problem. I never rearfaced, I sat on people's lap with no seatbelt most of my childhood and I was still carsick...

[Fundie Bunny]

7 hours ago, actuallyjessica said:

Isn't it nice how times change and research is compiled to ensure that things like car seats are safer? My mother (who is 50) was carried home on my grandmothers lap as they travelled in a car that had no seat belts.

Hopefully one day ERF will become something just as normal as seatbelts!

My aunts went once on a road trip in the trunk of a car with a goat. They were 4 and 5 i think. They werethe youngest of 7, so as long as they were kn sight i don't think my grandma even cared

[Melissa1977]

1 hour ago, elliha said:

Here in Sweden doctors say that children under 2 cannot be carsick and they don't seem to get carsick from what I have seen. I have never heard of a carsick baby. If they are over 2 and carsick they still say that they should not be turned and instead keep the cars as cold as you can stand, neither give too little or too much food and no screens or books. My daughter has thrown up twice in the car after she turned 3, once she refused to eat breakfast and then 1,5 hours later ate a lot of food at a gas station and then threw half of it up. The other time she was drawing in the car and it probably made her carsick. I am and always was very carsick myself so I expected her to be carsick but she doesn't seem to have that much of a problem. I never rearfaced, I sat on people's lap with no seatbelt most of my childhood and I was still carsick...

My little one has thrown up 5 times from 12 to 18 months old. Considering we don't drive often, I think this is a lot!. Sometimes it has been because the curves, but a couple of times it has been in a highway. I'm sure he got carsick. I'm a bad mother and from 18 moths old, I let him watch cartoons in the car and I feed him salty food (I'm carsick myself and salty food helps me a lot). I know none of this is correct but driving with a crying toddler is horrible and vomit in the car isn't nice indeed.

My eldest was also carsick as a baby when driving on curvy roads. I don't remember if it was often, but he was a baby for sure because he was rear facing. I remember cleaning the car seats from time to time and it's not a nice memory.

[elliha]

1 minute ago, Melissa1977 said:

My little one has thrown up 5 times from 12 to 18 months old. Considering we don't drive often, I think this is a lot!. Sometimes it has been because the curves, but a couple of times it has been in a highway. I'm sure he got carsick. I'm a bad mother and from 18 moths old, I let him watch cartoons in the car and I feed him salty food (I'm carsick myself and salty food helps me a lot). I know none of this is correct but driving with a crying toddler is horrible and vomit in the car isn't nice indeed.

My eldest was also carsick as a baby when driving on curvy roads. I don't remember if it was often, but he was a baby for sure because he was rear facing. I remember cleaning the car seats from time to time and it's not a nice memory.

Nope, cleaning carseats is never ever fun... I give my child food in the car too but no screens as I know from personal experience that they may cause more carsickness. No, crying children in the car are not fun at all, I still vividly remember the time we got stuck in traffic and our child pooped in her diaper and just went crazy and screamed and screamed and we could do very little to help her until the traffic cleared. We probably looked so distressed at the gas station we stopped at to change the diaper we got free coffee...

[LawsonBatesEgo]

4 hours ago, elliha said:

Here in Sweden doctors say that children under 2 cannot be carsick and they don't seem to get carsick from what I have seen. I have never heard of a carsick baby. If they are over 2 and carsick they still say that they should not be turned and instead keep the cars as cold as you can stand, neither give too little or too much food and no screens or books. My daughter has thrown up twice in the car after she turned 3, once she refused to eat breakfast and then 1,5 hours later ate a lot of food at a gas station and then threw half of it up. The other time she was drawing in the car and it probably made her carsick. I am and always was very carsick myself so I expected her to be carsick but she doesn't seem to have that much of a problem. I never rearfaced, I sat on people's lap with no seatbelt most of my childhood and I was still carsick...

I guess Swedish doctors haven't seen the case of my family......where carsickness runs in my mother's family DNA it seems. Maybe it originates in Colombia (where she was born!). 

[Ali]

I don't know enough about babies prone to carsickness needing to forward face to comment on that. My baby hates his carseat, but I think it has more to do with not liking feeling restrained than rear facing.

I do know that there is a lot of misinformation about ERF. I had some of my in-laws tell me that I needed to forward face so that my daughter's legs don't get broken. One even claimed that her pediatrician told her to switch to forward facing to avoid leg injury. Even if leg injuries were as common as many claim, a broken leg is better than a spinal injury IMHO.

The article linked below is from 2011, but it addresses the risk of leg injury and the reasons for rear-facing. It also describes how carseats are different in Sweden.

https://www.washingtonpost.com/local/parents-wrestle-with-rear-facing-carseat-advice/2011/09/08/gIQAb4cOuK_story.html

 

[elliha]

2 minutes ago, Ali said:

I don't know enough about babies prone to carsickness needing to forward face to comment on that. My baby hates his carseat, but I think it has more to do with not liking feeling restrained than rear facing.

I do know that there is a lot of misinformation about ERF. I had some of my in-laws tell me that I needed to forward face so that my daughter's legs don't get broken. One even claimed that her pediatrician told her to switch to forward facing to avoid leg injury. Even if leg injuries were as common as many claim, a broken leg is better than a spinal injury IMHO.

The article linked below is from 2011, but it addresses the risk of leg injury and the reasons for rear-facing. It also describes how carseats are different in Sweden.

https://www.washingtonpost.com/local/parents-wrestle-with-rear-facing-carseat-advice/2011/09/08/gIQAb4cOuK_story.html

 

I don't think that the legroom is the big issue, ours was fit snugly to the seat until my daughter turned 3,5 or so. Now we have moved it so that she has more legroom but I still pretty sure that she could have made it to 4 with it fitted snugly. It is true that there are models with metal legs but a couple are without a metal leg and still allows rearfacing for a long time. I don't know if this one would be legal in the States but this is an example: http://www.jollyroom.se/produkter/britax-two-way-cosmos-black. It can be used forwardfacing too but that is always discouraged before the child is big enough for a booster here though legal. Ours is no longer made but is similar to this one. Would I have bought one today I would have gotten this one: http://www.jollyroom.se/produkter/axkid-minikid-tetris-svart. It does have a metal leg though. 

[SassyPants]

1 hour ago, LawsonBatesEgo said:

I guess Swedish doctors haven't seen the case of my family......where carsickness runs in my mother's family DNA it seems. Maybe it originates in Colombia (where she was born!). 

I should have sent my kids to Sweden so that they could do a case study.

Wonder if reflux exists?

I knew Scandinavia was Utopia.