Jill Duggar Dillard Part 9: They slosh through the rain.

[Mercer]

6 hours ago, gustava said:

“It’s important for us to not just get an education for the sake of getting an education,” Derick wrote in a blog post on the Dillard Family website. “That is not a true education. The purpose of any educational endeavor, whether primary, secondary, or post-secondary, ought to be to prepare to contribute to society, and for Christians, that means productivity for the Kingdom.”

Really, Derick? How exactly are you productive?

At first I thought he was joking since no one in his nuclear family works for a living and they rely entirely on donations, but I think the Dillards just are really that lacking in self-awareness.

[CorruptionInc.]

I am concerned for Israel Dillard. Poor child looks scared to death and so uncomfortable. I wouldn't let Jill touch children with a 40ft pole. Same goes for Derrick.

[ClaraOswin]

9 hours ago, halcionne said:

I think it's worth remembering that we only see a small fraction of their lives, and much of it is staged. We don't have enough information to say Jill hasn't bonded with Israel, or that she hands him off to someone else at every opportunity. Lots of members, including me, see pictures or footage and assign all kinds of meaning to what we're looking at, based on what we think we know of the Duggars' lives, but the reality is that we know very little.

I can't believe I'm defending them. @Mama Mia, @singsingsing, and other posters used to issue this sort of reminder from time to time, and I haven't seen Mama Mia around much. I'm not sure if sing comes into QFOD lately.

Hahahaha that makes me feel way more special than it should. 

I'm glad Treva Bowdoin wrote the article in such a way that Manos Abiertas (hopefully) doesn't get any blowback.

I agree. It's only a tiny snippet of their lives. I'd never try to "diagnose" something like PPD or whatever. But I still do find it odd that I haven't seen many photos or videos of them holding/snuggling with Israel like you normally see from parents. Jill has lived her life mostly in the public eye for a decade now so it's just strange that these photos haven't been posted. (Or maybe they have and I've missed them...?)

6 hours ago, anjulibai said:

Eh, when I gave birth 4 years ago, the neonatal department baby classes taught us how to swaddle. We had our son stay much of the time in the nursury so I could sleep, and they swaddled him. I never quite got the hang of it, though, so DS wasn't swaddled after we left the hospital. 

Baby class at my hospital...summer 2013....they taught us how to swaddle as well.

[ChickenettiLuvr]

Here's the link from Pickles' page that showed up in my feed.

http://www.starpulse.com/news/index.php/2015/12/31/jill-dillard-blanket-training-disturbi

 

NOW:  Look at the one down further, where Izzy is sitting on a blanket with toys.
Am I the only one that sees a wide-open outlet on the wall behind him?

[MatthewDuggar]

2 hours ago, ChickenettiLuvr said:

Here's the link from Pickles' page that showed up in my feed.

http://www.starpulse.com/news/index.php/2015/12/31/jill-dillard-blanket-training-disturbi

 

NOW:  Look at the one down further, where Izzy is sitting on a blanket with toys.
Am I the only one that sees a wide-open outlet on the wall behind him?

Nope, and it's mentioned in the article as well.

[Kittikatz]

13 hours ago, RootBeerFloat said:

That's sometimes called "cocooning" and can help an overstimulated child. Sensory seeking kids (not necessarily with autism, but sometimes) can be comforted by being bundled up like that. They make special, lightweight super spandex-y cocoons for kids. Some like a weighted blanket. All are used under supervision, usually recommended by an OT or similar. Some kids just like a good bear hug.  Of course other kids would freak out at the sensory stimulation of being wrapped up in such a manner. If it's not used to calm the child and is used to punish him, that's horrible! (Not talking about kids who must be restrained for safety.) I don't know if that's what Jilly Muffin is doing or if she's just a dumbass. 

I can totally see holding a tantruming child or using one of these cocoon  things to comfort the little one and get them to focus on something besides the emotional meltdown. One of my cats has some pretty out of control moments - I put him in his comfy cat pyjamas (weird, I know....) and he calms right down, so that kind of cuddle feeling as a calming thing makes sence.  This kind of punishment swaddling just looks so wrong. I feel awful for Izzy. 

And I agree with those who say it appears that Jill may have some attachment issues with Izzy. Hopefully not, or if it is the case, I hope that she gets real help to get past whatever is causing it. The thought of someone going through life as a prop is something that I find distressing. Derrick seems more and more like a self centred man child on vacation than a grown ass husband and father.  It would be nice to see him step up and help get Jill the support she needs rather than just enjoying his grifted vacation.

Alternately, it could just be a side effect of Jill's rather binary belief system. A single girl takes good care of her buddy team, a newlywed woman takes obsessive care of her husband and acts slightly stalkerish towards him, a mother-to-be focuses on gestating and the wonder of life and writing 11 page birth plans, a wife and mother ignores her child and drifts around behind her husband.... The thought of a non-binary role or function just may not be something that she can process.

[ladyaudley]

The thing is, yes, toddlers bump into stuff and bruise all the time. But then you'd mention that in a caption! Something like "poor izzy has taken a knock while exploring" or anything to give context! Same with the swaddling pictures, which are just disturbing.

[AmazonGrace]

Whaddayall mean that the Dillards aren't productive?

http://www.hollywoodtake.com/jill-duggar-returning-soon-19-kids-money-problems-continue-derick-dillards-wife-stays-away-118831

Quote

But Jill also talked about the work she’s doing while in Central America. She said it was a “joy” to visit families and how much she liked learning Spanish.She and Derek have been “able to pass out a bunch of gospel tracts in the local area as we are out in the community.”

They've been able to pass tracts...

[Drala]

14 hours ago, twinmama said:

He certainly is a cute little guy.  I'm also a twin momma, but my boys are old enough to have children of their own.

[Ali]

7 hours ago, ChickenettiLuvr said:

Here's the link from Pickles' page that showed up in my feed.

http://www.starpulse.com/news/index.php/2015/12/31/jill-dillard-blanket-training-disturbi

 

NOW:  Look at the one down further, where Izzy is sitting on a blanket with toys.
Am I the only one that sees a wide-open outlet on the wall behind him?

I see the nonchildproofed outlet behind him. Is he crawling yet? Just because they have him on a blanket with toys does not mean they are blanket training him. I would put a baby that was not crawling yet on a blanket with toys and I would never dream of blanket training a child. That tile would not be as pleasant to sit on as a blanket.

[Fascinated]

I feel sorry for Izzy when viewing the swaddling photos, too. But, I am more upset by the complete lack of choice he will have with regards to his religious beliefs, or lack thereof. I HATE that he (and Spurgeon too, I assume) were read bible verses from the moment of birth, and, probably the nine months prior. How I wish all kids could be permitted to make up their own minds. It makes me ragey.

[ClaraOswin]

40 minutes ago, Ali said:

I see the nonchildproofed outlet behind him. Is he crawling yet? Just because they have him on a blanket with toys does not mean they are blanket training him. I would put a baby that was not crawling yet on a blanket with toys and I would never dream of blanket training a child. That tile would not be as pleasant to sit on as a blanket.

He is crawling. I think they even had video of him trying to crawl up the stairs at one point (though I believe I've seen safety gates since then.) 

Even after my son could crawl we had blankets on our floor. We even have carpet. But he spit up massive amounts of formula all the time. It was easiest to swap out blankets. Of course, it was sort of a lost cause once he was crawling. We did use a baby corral to keep him contained a lot of the time. They make those nice big ones with numerous panels so I could fit inside with him to play.

Blanket training is disgusting. You should WANT your child to explore the world. But in the Duggar world, that's the worst thing ever.

4 minutes ago, Fascinated said:

I feel sorry for Izzy when viewing the swaddling photos, too. But, I am more upset by the complete lack of choice he will have with regards to his religious beliefs, or lack thereof. I HATE that he (and Spurgeon too, I assume) were read bible verses from the moment of birth, and, probably the nine months prior. How I wish all kids could be permitted to make up their own minds. It makes me ragey.

I agree. Unfortunately it's not exclusive to fundies. I'd say that most parents of any religion will only educate their kids on that one religion. I mean...I'm certainly not going to go out and learn all types of religion or whatever so my son can pick one. However, unlike the Duggars, if he is older and does it on his own...I won't discourage it. I also won't force him to be the religion I am if he doesn't agree with it. But we know the Duggars would never allow anything other than reading bible verses 24/7.

[DarkAnts]

They have reposted the request asking their fans to sponsor the two children so they can learn English. 

[Antimony]

12 minutes ago, ClaraOswin said:

He is crawling. I think they even had video of him trying to crawl up the stairs at one point (though I believe I've seen safety gates since then.) 

Even after my son could crawl we had blankets on our floor. We even have carpet. But he spit up massive amounts of formula all the time. It was easiest to swap out blankets. Of course, it was sort of a lost cause once he was crawling. We did use a baby corral to keep him contained a lot of the time. They make those nice big ones with numerous panels so I could fit inside with him to play.

Blanket training is disgusting. You should WANT your child to explore the world. But in the Duggar world, that's the worst thing ever.

I agree. Unfortunately it's not exclusive to fundies. I'd say that most parents of any religion will only educate their kids on that one religion. I mean...I'm certainly not going to go out and learn all types of religion or whatever so my son can pick one. However, unlike the Duggars, if he is older and does it on his own...I won't discourage it. I also won't force him to be the religion I am if he doesn't agree with it. But we know the Duggars would never allow anything other than reading bible verses 24/7.

My mother bought me this book when I was very young called World Myths by Marilyn McFarlane. It has the top 5 most important myths from the top 6 (I think) world religions, written in terms children can understand. She gave it to me so I could chose. I chose nothing but I loved that book and still have it. 

[JillsFlowerHeadband]

1 hour ago, Ali said:

I see the nonchildproofed outlet behind him. Is he crawling yet? Just because they have him on a blanket with toys does not mean they are blanket training him. I would put a baby that was not crawling yet on a blanket with toys and I would never dream of blanket training a child. That tile would not be as pleasant to sit on as a blanket.

I put blankets down on the floor when my daughter was small like that because our tile floors weren't very friendly to tiny crawling hands and knees, that's understandable. The bruise could be from an active baby taking a spill, sure, LF got a giant goose egg on her head when she ran her walker seat into the corner of the china hutch in my parents' dining room at a fairly good clip. 

I hate to seem like I'm WKing for Jill, but babies and young kids hurt themselves and that doesn't necessarily mean they're being abused. I don't agree with the swaddling or blanket training if she's using it, but  one image showing a baby with a bruise and sitting on a blanket =/= "that poor little boy is being beaten within an inch of his life". Is it possible that Jill and Derick are using the Pearls' method? It surely is, but one image doesn't tell the entire story.

The open outlet in reach of small fingers is scary though. 

Spoiler

There is nothing in this spoiler, I just couldn't figure out how to get rid of the stupid thing after I accidentally clicked on it. 

[notfundy]

@JillsFlowerHeadband  (love your name btw)... I agree with you.  One or two pictures do not tell the whole story, and this is especially true of the "black eye" or irritated eye - or whatever is going on with Izzy.  It happens with kids this age.  If you're going to post a picture maybe give a little context (see below).  

Likewise, I have never been much disturbed by pics of Izzy on a blanket ... putting down a quilt or blanket is a fairly normal thing to do on a cold floor or even on a carpet - to try to "contain" the spit-up or whatever.  My daughter does that for her now-crawling around everywhere and standing and cruising nine-month old.  No Big Deal.

But here's the thing:  are the Duggar-Dillards COMPLETELY oblivious to what people might think and say?  Do they not kno that blanket training might have a bad rep?  They HAVE to read the comments on their own social media (right????!!!)   Or do they think EVERYONE who is commenting is just out to get them because they are Christians?  Because the evil worldly people are ALL about persecuting them?  Can they be this clueless?  

So if they know or anticipate that some comments will be negative, might they not head those comments off with a little context?An example was given by someone here (I think) re: the black eye -- maybe a caption such as: "Oops - Izzy has been exploring everywhere and had an encounter with an end table".  

Re: the swaddling (or whateverthefuck that is) maybe a caption ... "calming Izzy" or "settling Izzy down" (not that I agree with this technique once is it clear he is still distressed.).. but give us SOMETHNG to work with here, or everyone is off speculating wildly beyond what might even be happening.  Which is probably bad enough to begin with.  

[JillsFlowerHeadband]

14 minutes ago, notfundy said:

@JillsFlowerHeadband  (love your name btw)... I agree with you.  One or two pictures do not tell the whole story, and this is especially true of the "black eye" or irritated eye - or whatever is going on with Izzy.  It happens with kids this age.  If you're going to post a picture maybe give a little context (see below).  

Likewise, I have never been much disturbed by pics of Izzy on a blanket ... putting down a quilt or blanket is a fairly normal thing to do on a cold floor or even on a carpet - to try to "contain" the spit-up or whatever.  My daughter does that for her now-crawling around everywhere and standing and cruising nine-month old.  No Big Deal.

But here's the thing:  are the Duggar-Dillards COMPLETELY oblivious to what people might think and say?  Do they not kno that blanket training might have a bad rep?  They HAVE to read the comments on their own social media (right????!!!)   Or do they think EVERYONE who is commenting is just out to get them because they are Christians?  Because the evil worldly people are ALL about persecuting them?  Can they be this clueless?  

So if they know or anticipate that some comments will be negative, might they not head those comments off with a little context?An example was given by someone here (I think) re: the black eye -- maybe a caption such as: "Oops - Izzy has been exploring everywhere and had an encounter with an end table".  

Re: the swaddling (or whateverthefuck that is) maybe a caption ... "calming Izzy" or "settling Izzy down" (not that I agree with this technique once is it clear he is still distressed.).. but give us SOMETHNG to work with here, or everyone is off speculating wildly beyond what might even be happening.  Which is probably bad enough to begin with.  

These are all excellent points and I do agree... truthfully though? I do think they are that clueless, clueless and at the same time convinced that if people are critical of them its because they are EBIL HEATHENS WHO DON'T UNDERSTAND HOW GODLY PARENTING™ WORKS!!!!!1 I do think that they would be better off to explain what's going on in the pictures, but what do I know? I'm an ebil, not-church-attending, divorced and remarried, working mother of only one child so everything I think I know about parenting must be wrong, amirite?

[Bad Wolf]

Don't know if they are using Pearls' methods, but I wonder if Derick and his mother really understand the Duggar way of training. It's pretty hard for a MIL to even offer suggestions.Derick may simply be clueless about babies, but being educated, he should be able to do a little research.

[2manyKidzzz]

Guess I was a bad mother. When my kids were crying I would offer them a cookie or a cartoon show. Used a playpen for safety when necessary. Removed sharp edges from our small house. Watched them carefully as they were wild boys. (for the youngest, had to removed furniture and take pictures off the wall.....glass.....the youngest broke down a baby gate and tumbled down the stairs when less than one year old). Laughing all the way they were. I was exhausted. They never stopped moving. Ha ha

[Ali]

13 minutes ago, 2manyKidzzz said:

Guess I was a bad mother. When my kids were crying I would offer them a cookie or a cartoon show. Used a playpen for safety when necessary. Removed sharp edges from our small house. Watched them carefully as they were wild boys. (for the youngest, had to removed furniture and take pictures off the wall.....glass.....the youngest broke down a baby gate and tumbled down the stairs when less than one year old). Laughing all the way they were. I was exhausted. They never stopped moving. Ha ha

I must be a horrible mother too. I would leave a crying baby in a playpen to clean up broken glass or use the bathroom if the child was not calming down anytime soon. I could not not imagine swaddling an older baby, putting it in a playpen, and taking a picture of it crying. Poor baby.

[Bad Wolf]

If there had been an explanation it would be easier to understand. Something like trying swaddling to calm Izzy and figuring out that it didn't work for him, so scratch that idea. The bruise didn't bother me so much. I could have put my son in a padded room, and he would come out with bruises.

If you're semi famous, and post onto social media, it would be prudent to add some captions. I guess negative publicity is still good.

[IrishCarrie]

I think they've discovered the delete button on Facebook - there are loads of leghumper comments giving out to previous posters for their negativity, but the "negative" posts are gone.

Totally ruining my enjoyment of their page; doubt if I'll bother going there any more now

[PennySycamore]

8 hours ago, AmazonGrace said:

Whaddayall mean that the Dillards aren't productive?

http://www.hollywoodtake.com/jill-duggar-returning-soon-19-kids-money-problems-continue-derick-dillards-wife-stays-away-118831

They've been able to pass tracts...

Aren't tracts only useful as toilet paper?

[silverspoons]

I don't understand why they can't hire a cheap nanny if Izzy being mobile is such a stress. There must be some nice recently converted believer that would find it an honor to help Jill with Izzy and do some housework or cook Derik some fattening meals. They wouldn't even have to say it was a nanny, just a friend. How expensive could it be?

I would have never thought I would have used a nanny. My son was walking at 9 months and 34 lbs at a year.. I had surgery and my husband was doing his residency and we were living very rural far from family. I was worried about who we would find for what we could afford but I could not lift or keep up with my son while recovering. Since we were rural, work was hard to find so when I put out an ad for help I got tons of responses for barely over minimum wage. I found a nice retired health care worker in her 50's who just wanted a little extra money and wanted to be out of the house. After I recovered from my surgery , I still kept the her on  3 days a week in the mornings. She not only was a help with my son but I had spent most of my 20's college and grad school so it was nice to have someone who helped me learn to cook better and not ruin laundry.

[PennySycamore]

5 hours ago, Drala said:

He certainly is a cute little guy.  I'm also a twin momma, but my boys are old enough to have children of their own.

I know that FJites have been all over themselves about how cute the various Bates grandchildren are, but @twinmama, your baby tops them all!