Titus2's Steve Maxwell: Seriously Anti-Fun

[mango_fandango]

Someone referenced the "Birthday" Mom's corner upthread. Wow :shock:

Dear lord, they've found a way to ruin birthdays. :evil-eye:

articles.titus2.com/celebrating-birthdays/

Oh jeez. Even Erika Shupe does things better. Karen turned 17 recently and they had a family over. Sure, every kid was making Froot Loop necklaces, but at least they had people over. For the younger kids they don't invite others over, but that is because Stalag Shupe is tiny.

It seems unbelievable that the Maxwell chidults ever even HAD friends to invite over for parties. Of course, simple excitement over a birthday HAS to be "selfish". Fuck me. I'm surprised even three of the kids have spouses at all. Those kids didn't have a childhood, they had a permanent guilt-trip that isn't over yet and never will be.

[Koala]

That decision was made about twenty-five years ago, so our younger children have never experienced having a birthday party or attending one either. When we chose not to have birthday parties with other children invited to them, we also decided not to allow our children to attend other children’s birthday parties. Since we knew we wouldn’t be reciprocating with a birthday party, it didn’t seem right to us to accept invitations to others’ parties. One benefit of this decision is that it began protecting our children from unforeseen influences at birthday parties they had been attending. Sometimes when an invitation arrived, it caused us to wonder what activities would be occurring at the party. It is very awkward to call a parent questioning the special plans they have for their child’s party. Our new policy helped us avoid these situations.

Okay, here's my question- for the younger kids to have never even been to a birthday party, that tells you that the older batch was pretty young back when they were still going to the wild, worldly birthday parties of selfish, elementary aged friends. Terri says she often had to call up the birthday child's parents to find out just what kind of activities would be occurring. She further states that she was concerned about "unforeseen influences".

What on earth kind of parties did her kids go to? My goodness, the ones we have/go to are just simple ice-cream and cake type get togethers. Kids play, eat, and open presents. Occasionally there's swimming or soccer- nothing fancy. Usually they're hosted in a park or someone's backyard. What did Terri think would happen? Beer and dancers? :wtf: :wtf:

[mango_fandango]

Okay, here's my question- for the younger kids to have never even been to a birthday party, that tells you that the older batch was pretty young back when they were still going to the wild, worldly birthday parties of selfish, elementary aged friends. Terri says she often had to call up the birthday child's parents to find out just what kind of activities would be occurring. She further states that she was concerned about "unforeseen influences".

What on earth kind of parties did her kids go to? My goodness, the ones we have/go to are just simple ice-cream and cake type get togethers. Kids play, eat, and open presents. Occasionally there's swimming or soccer- nothing fancy. Usually they're hosted in a park or someone's backyard. What did Terri think would happen? Beer and dancers? :wtf: :wtf:

I don't think it's that awkward to ask what will be happening. If it's not made explicit on the invitation, asking what will happen seems OK to me.... right? Or am I wrong and WOULD it seem weird/awkward to ask what would be going on? Maybe they would be playing Musical Bumps/Statues or Pass the Parcel and the music wasn't Godly. Or maybe there was frequent interaction with the opposite sex IDK.

[blessalessi]

If the great birthday dramarama took place before the reversals came along, Teri was right in the middle of her depression, and already struggling as a new homeschooler. Those were the days when first day of school had everyone in tears. Birthday parties would have tipped her right over the edge. :?

[Handmaiden of Dog]

When we began homeschooling, I would give the children their birthday off school. However, we started to see the children becoming possessive and demanding of not having to do school on their birthdays. Sometimes, because of other circumstances, it was necessary for them to do some or all of their normal schoolwork on their birthday. This could create bad attitudes in the birthday child.

Are they seriously that dense? Do Teri and Steve have no memories of being children? They give Sarah (for example) the day off from school because it is her birthday but then Teri tells Anna, "No sorry, we are too far behind in the schedule. You don't get to goof off today." Anna complains and they see this as a sign that the kids are getting "too possessive" of their birthdays. JFC! Teri and Steve are morons who are sorry to be raising flesh and blood children. They should have adopted some nice robots.

[blessalessi]

It seems to be a strong fundie theme: "I'm the Mom, life isn't fair, complain and you'll spend your birthday in the prayer closet..."

I can't wait for John to write "Growing Up Maxwell". :twisted:

[Handmaiden of Dog]

As to what happens if John gets married, I can see Steve either taking Jesse's bedroom door off the hinges or Steve moving in with Jesse. Sarah could then move in with Teri. My grandparents actually did this when they moved into a two bedroom apartment: grandpa and Dad shared one room, grandma and my aunt shared the other.

[SPHASH]

I had fun today, I watched the Vikings beat the Lions!

[AmazonGrace]

There are times when we pull back some of the privileges that normally attend a child’s birthday because by his pre-birthday talk we can see a self-focus growing.

I think this sounds like Steve's worries are completely unnecessary. There is absolutely no danger that the children in this house would have any fun ever. I'm sure they all know by now that if they get excited about anything they will be punished.

[apandaaries]

I don't think it's that awkward to ask what will be happening. If it's not made explicit on the invitation, asking what will happen seems OK to me.... right? Or am I wrong and WOULD it seem weird/awkward to ask what would be going on? Maybe they would be playing Musical Bumps/Statues or Pass the Parcel and the music wasn't Godly. Or maybe there was frequent interaction with the opposite sex IDK.

Their concern over the birthday party activities is so odd to me. I've never been to a kid's birthday party where there was a bar, or strippers, or anything like that. The vast majority of parties have been around lunchtime, with lunch served (pizza has been a perennial favorite, but that's starting to change a wee bit now that the kids are aging) and featured kids playing, some games/crafts/actitivies, cake, and maybe present opening. We've also been to a lot of parties where they were either at a kids' center (like with go-karts, miniature golf, etc), or at beaches, both of which were fairly self-explanatory. Most parents would choose to stick around for the beach parties, because we don't usually have life guards on our beaches here -- but most parents have been welcome at most parties we've attended, anyway.

It's just another pathetic excuse to further isolate the family from the rest of humanity. They get to be more godly and denounce all those worldly heathens and their pathetic pastimes. I mean, do you think they even had Bible study time at these parties? Sinners bound for burning hellfire and damnation, those birthday party-havin' folks.

[SPHASH]

After reading the Maxwell's attitude regarding birthday parties, no wonder Elizabeth Munck ran screaming for the hills. She dodged a huge fucking bullet. I know they had a little party for Joshua's 2nd birthday last year and I think Bethany did too.

[anjulibai]

I don't think it's that awkward to ask what will be happening. If it's not made explicit on the invitation, asking what will happen seems OK to me.... right? Or am I wrong and WOULD it seem weird/awkward to ask what would be going on? Maybe they would be playing Musical Bumps/Statues or Pass the Parcel and the music wasn't Godly. Or maybe there was frequent interaction with the opposite sex IDK.

It's weird because none of the things you mentioned are a big deal to normal people. They are only a big deal to the Maxwells. So that conversation would get awkward really quickly.

Teri: We got your invitation for Sarah to come to little Lee's birthday. Before we accept I have a few questions.

Normal Parent: Um, okay. We're really just doing some normal birthday stuff, cake, ice cream and lots of games with prizes.

Teri: Games with prizes? Well, I don't know if that will do. We are trying to discourage competitive spirits in our children.

Normal Parent: Huh? It's just musical chairs and pin the tail on the donkey.

Teri: Yes, that would not do. Musical chairs in general is too much like dancing. What music are you using?

Normal Parent: Well.....I have a cassette of Raffi songs, like Row Row Row Your Boat and the Itsy Bitsy Spider.

Teri: Oh dear, yes, we will definitely have to decline this invitation. We are trying to protect our children from such worldly influences...

Normal Parent: Row Row Row Your Boat....?

Teri: ....and we do not want Sarah wasting brain space on such songs and games.

Normal Parent: Uh-huh.

Teri: I hope your daughter has a very nice birthday, but I want to encourage you to think about her soul's future. Where will she go when she dies?

Normal Parent:..........Lee's a boy.......

Teri: Oh....well, that's all the more reason for Sarah not to attend. We do not approve on girls and boys mixing, as that can lead to inappropriate feelings and desires that cannot be righteously filled.

Normal Parent:.....He's only turning 7.....

Teri: I will pray for you your family. Have a blessed day in Christ.

*click*

Normal Parent: The fuck was that?

[Lizardlemon]

I'm 20 minutes from St. Clairsville OH, where they were this weekend. I spent the weekend watching evil Harry Potter movies with my kids, going to Mass, and going to a Star Wars themed kids' birthday party where the adults had beer and boys and girls trained to be Jedis together. Stevehovah would not approve!

[Fascinated]

I wonder how many birthday party invitations the kids actually received? Imagine how heartbreaking it would be to extend an invite to those poor kids in an attempt to show them a measly couple of hours of normal childhood fun, only to have it declined for that very reason. They are sick fucks.

[apandaaries]

I'm 20 minutes from St. Clairsville OH, where they were this weekend. I spent the weekend watching evil Harry Potter movies with my kids, going to Mass, and going to a Star Wars themed kids' birthday party where the adults had beer and boys and girls trained to be Jedis together. Stevehovah would not approve!

Except for the Mass (not my thing), that sounds like an awesome weekend! How I wish the birthday parties I attend would have beer! Maybe I should try to start a new trend. :lol:

[YoshiCat]

I don't think it's that awkward to ask what will be happening. If it's not made explicit on the invitation, asking what will happen seems OK to me.... right? Or am I wrong and WOULD it seem weird/awkward to ask what would be going on? Maybe they would be playing Musical Bumps/Statues or Pass the Parcel and the music wasn't Godly. Or maybe there was frequent interaction with the opposite sex IDK.

Birthday parties are a minefield! What if the party has a superhero theme? The kids might think Superman is awesome because he has special powers and that's too much like witchcraft. Or there could be the horror of a magician. Can't expose the kids to the dark arts! Harry Potter theme? They'd be cindemed to hell the minute they set eyes on that.

What if there are snacks and sweets just sitting out and the kids can grab some whenever they want?!?!?!? They might enjoy eating or get the crazy idea that they have some say in what and when they eat.

What if they play musical chairs or have a moon bounce?? They'd be bumping up against members of the opposite sex. And who knows what sort of music might be played. Worst if all, the kids may enjoy themselves and then selfishly want to play games and have fun on days when there's no birthday party. And sometimes adults have some beer or wine. The Maxhells would never recover from the horror of witnessing that.

I can see some circumstances where a parent might want to know what's going to be at the party. Maybe your child has a allergy. Or maybe you're child has a physical limitation and you want to tell him ahead of time that there will be certain games he can't play. Maybe your kid is afraid of clowns. But those are all specific questions. I wonder what these other parents thought when they'd get a phone call drilling them on every little detail of the party.

[YoshiCat]

Oh jeez. Even Erika Shupe does things better. Karen turned 17 recently and they had a family over. Sure, every kid was making Froot Loop necklaces, but at least they had people over. For the younger kids they don't invite others over, but that is because Stalag Shupe is tiny.

It seems unbelievable that the Maxwell chidults ever even HAD friends to invite over for parties. Of course, simple excitement over a birthday HAS to be "selfish". Fuck me. I'm surprised even three of the kids have spouses at all. Those kids didn't have a childhood, they had a permanent guilt-trip that isn't over yet and never will be.

Then again, Erica doesn't let her kids play organized sports because they might enjoy it too much. And when it seemed as if the older girls were enjoying reading fiction, she limited the time they're allowed to read fiction. Most of their reading time had to be spent on nonfiction. I hope she doesn't start to think they live that too much and respond by not letting them read very often.

[Maggie Mae]

There's also the idea that the Maxwell's could interact with children who are much more worldly. Kids with single or divorced parents. Kids who have read books and seen age appropriate fantasy films. Then the Maxwell adults will have to explain things to their children. Maxwell parenting is lazy parenting.

[Jana814]

I wonder how many birthday party invitations the kids actually received? Imagine how heartbreaking it would be to extend an invite to those poor kids in an attempt to show them a measly couple of hours of normal childhood fun, only to have it declined for that very reason. They are sick fucks.

Agree!!

[Jana814]

Of all the Mom corners I've read this one about birthday's really breaks my heart. They denied their children out of soo much. The line that bothered me the most was the part about how the only thing the kid talked about leading up to the party was the party. They r young kids for crying out loud its what kids do.

[defraudingjezebel]

Of all the Mom corners I've read this one about birthday's really breaks my heart. They denied their children out of soo much. The line that bothered me the most was the part about how the only thing the kid talked about leading up to the party was the party. They r young kids for crying out loud its what kids do.

It breaks my heart too and also infuriates me. Teri and Steve don't want to indulge their kids in even the smallest event to make them feel special for the day. They dislike that the kids were focused on the excitement around the party and talking about "nothing but the party".

The Maxwell parents are so incredibly hypocritical!!! The whole family is allowed to go on special trips as long as it contains activities that Steve likes- i.e. the Colorado hiking trips. You can't tell me that Steve doesn't rant and rave about preparing for the trips weeks in advance. We all know that he is the one who wants to go and calls the shots. When Steve talks about an event that HE wants to do, it isn't selfishness... it's "preparation." I see right through your facade, Steve. You aren't fooling anyone except your brainwashed family.

[mango_fandango]

It breaks my heart too and also infuriates me. Teri and Steve don't want to indulge their kids in even the smallest event to make them feel special for the day. They dislike that the kids were focused on the excitement around the party and talking about "nothing but the party".

The Maxwell parents are so incredibly hypocritical!!! The whole family is allowed to go on special trips as long as it contains activities that Steve likes- i.e. the Colorado hiking trips. You can't tell me that Steve doesn't rant and rave about preparing for the trips weeks in advance. We all know that he is the one who wants to go and calls the shots. When Steve talks about an event that HE wants to do, it isn't selfishness... it's "preparation." I see right through your facade, Steve. You aren't fooling anyone except your brainwashed family.

It makes me sad too. The Seriously Dads posts are kind of just "I notice people are like xxx these days. Are YOU like xxx? Do you want your CHILDREN to end up like xxx? You need to think if being xxx is good for your lives and whether it's how God wants you to live your lives". Steve's posts are just plain stupidity. It's Teri's Mom's Corner posts that are the more depressing ones. Mom's Corner posts are also much longer than the Seriously Dad posts. I'm pointing out the bleeding obvious here, but this is very reflective of Steve's and Teri's personalities. Steve gets to the point quickly, makes a short passive-aggressive statement. Teri rambles on and spills out her feelings (in a fairly subtle manner, more so than Stevie boy) and there's always a slight tone of sadness in them.

[Anonymousguest]

There's also the idea that the Maxwell's could interact with children who are much more worldly. Kids with single or divorced parents. Kids who have read books and seen age appropriate fantasy films. Then the Maxwell adults will have to explain things to their children. Maxwell parenting is lazy parenting.

Chances are the invitations were from other Homeschool families, likely people from their own church, as they would be the only social contact they would have had. I do agree with you, they took the easy way out.

I think most parents want their kids to be exposed to different views while they are young, so the parents can explain why their family does or doesn't do things a certain way. It's part of teaching kids to think critically for themselves. With the Maxwells they just continued to make their world smaller and smaller as they got older, ensuring the kids never thought for themselves.

As far as the punishment for anything that even glints of selfishness, I wouldn't be surprised if one of the kids self harmed.

[SPHASH]

If a kid is being out of sorts about something, grounding them by taking away an activity they like is fine..no TV, video games etc. But don't cancel a birthday party, an event that happens only once a year. Food deprivation is another punishment Steve has used, Anna wrote about she and the reversal boys were having a silly argument about cats and dogs. Steve punished the boys by making them eat Wheat Thins in the car while the rest of the family ate at Taco Bell.

[Koala]

I don't really care what their reasons were, Terri and Steve stole these kids' chance at a normal life. They stole their ability to make choices, by poisoning their minds with a crippling fear of the most benign things in the world. I mean birthday parties- ffs, who the hell thinks of that? But when you think about it, it's the first rule of abuse: isolation. The isolated them, the convinced them that they were the only "good" ones, and then they made them afraid of everyone else. It's disgusting.

How on earth do they look across the breakfast table at their rapidly aging adult children day after day and not feel mind numbing guilt??? Do they care that their daughter who is approaching her mid-thirties has never known the joy of falling in love, holding a new baby (that actually belongs to her), or even simple things like decorating her own house?? She's never even gone to the grocery and wandered around pondering what to cook for dinner. No, she's got to have an accountability partner- in her 30s .

Steve and Terri got to make their choices. They got to raise their kids. Now they are forcing their daughters to stay and live the life of an elderly person. It's ridiculous.