Caroling/Maxhell Christmas - MERGE

[MamaJunebug]

Random thoughts:

Not sure why the Maxhellions no longer make me want to gnaw my own head off, but they don't, and that's great because there's *so* much to say.

Is Anna's plaid shirt flannel? There's nothing wrong with that, but it would be funny.

Run, Tina! And take your sisters with you. Srsly, Tina, your "adorable personality" is going to be scrubbed when your grandfather realizes you're more energetic and possibly brighter than your same-aged boy cousin.

I give Poor Sarah a huge pass on the flowerdy headband. Her young years came and went with a steady diet of strict scheduling, fewer and fewer dishes containing animal proteins, dragging around with the family circus, and - for all we know - no interaction with young men her age. In other words, she's pretty much lived the life of a Roman Catholic nun in the 1940s and '50s. Let her have her headband.

I *bet* John's biscuits are dreamy!!!!

Is it only me, or does young Mrs. Joseph Maxwell look like a force to be reckoned with? Maybe it's just the way her dark hair and eyes and classic profile stand out among the beige born-Maxwell women + Teri + Grandma, but she looks like she could shake things up.

Moses and all the prophets, Elissa and Joseph, you're together! We get it!

Also, Elissa's hand on hubby's tummy. Shades of Cathy Arndt. At least it's her husband's tummy, and not her sons'...

Interesting that there are no close-ups of the lovely NRAnna. I wonder if she politely requested to stay in the background. What you can see of her, she looks happy as usual. Just interesting that she's background material.

Also, here's your conspiracy du jour: Why isn't Nathan in the God's Gym (Basement/Garage Venue) photo? Hmmm?? Christopher is, *and* one of his children.

Steve, better do something about that paunch before it gives you Dunlop's Disease! (That's where your stomach dun lop over your belt buckle.)

[twin2]

It seems like an FU internets to people who may have commented on their love of expensive gadgets like iPhones and high-end cameras and big honkin' trucks and $700 mixers and whatnot. CONSUMERISM IS THE DEVIL! Used is godly.

The Iphones kill me. What the hell do the Maxwells do on a smart phone. All they probably do is call and text each other from their own house and the houses of the married bros. They can't be trusted on the internet so no data needed. No aps as fun is of the devil. You'd think a basic phone would do what they needed.

[anjulibai]

MamaJuneBug, I noticed the lack of NRAnna, too, along with Ruthanne. Seemed odd to me.

[terranova]

I probably look as exhausted as Melanie and I only have two kids. Plus I don't have to keep up to a Father-in-Law's exacting standards. Poor duck.

[ViolaSebastian]

That banner seems really strange to me. Who on earth (well, the Maxwells, I guess) would want a plastic banner up in their entryway to welcome people? It seems more suited to a school or a church than to a family home.

[singsingsing]

I don't understand what she means about the banner. She's saying it was a Christmas gift, but then she's saying that Joseph got it for Steve when they moved into the house? Huh? I mean, which is it?

[Peas n carrots]

Gigi looks adorable. I wish I could take her into my home...she could live out her final years on her own terms, not Steve's.

[clese]

Johns biscuits!!! Lol

[moodygirl86]

Could someone please explain to me the logic as to why the women have to work out in long skirts in their own damn garage where one one can see them. It is absolutely ridiculous.

Well, no one except God, who she thinks will smite her for putting on a pair of trackies...

[anjulibai]

Well, no one except God, who she thinks will smite her for putting on a pair of trackies...

Their brothers and father might see them, too. Can't have that!

[salsa]

Most people give and receive gifts. The Maxwells, on the other hand, are gifted with them.

[AllisonWndrland]

The Iphones kill me. What the hell do the Maxwells do on a smart phone. All they probably do is call and text each other from their own house and the houses of the married bros. They can't be trusted on the internet so no data needed. No aps as fun is of the devil. You'd think a basic phone would do what they needed.

The iPhone thing is really odd. My husband nudged me in the middle of a presentation at the Wichita conference. He was looking for an open wi-fi connection and found one labeled something like "Anna Maxwell's wi-fi". Even if she uses her phone as a hotspot for the entire family, I still don't understand why. They say they have strict filters on their phones. Why do they need a hotspot at a conference? The only thing. I can think of requiring a hotspot is their sales table for receipts or a Square reader or similar.

Also, absolutely zero imagination for the wi-fi name. None. That made me sad.

[kpmom]

The iPhone thing is really odd. My husband nudged me in the middle of a presentation at the Wichita conference. He was looking for an open wi-fi connection and found one labeled something like "Anna Maxwell's wi-fi". Even if she uses her phone as a hotspot for the entire family, I still don't understand why. They say they have strict filters on their phones. Why do they need a hotspot at a conference? The only thing. I can think of requiring a hotspot is their sales table for receipts or a Square reader or similar.

Also, absolutely zero imagination for the wi-fi name. None. That made me sad.

They do use their phones for sales receipts and I think charge/debit sales. They mentioned this on one of their "reports" a while back.

Anna's wifi wasn't password protected? Your husband could have looked at porn using Anna's wifi???

[salex]

That banner seems really strange to me. Who on earth (well, the Maxwells, I guess) would want a plastic banner up in their entryway to welcome people? It seems more suited to a school or a church than to a family home.

They can take it with them to use when they display their wares.

AND

Their home is their office.

And

The cult members need constant reminders.

[AllisonWndrland]

They do use their phones for sales receipts and I think charge/debit sales. They mentioned this on one of their "reports" a while back.

Anna's wifi wasn't password protected? Your husband could have looked at porn using Anna's wifi???

Anna's was on the list of available wi-fi, but Mr. Allison believes it was password protected. Otherwise, we would have had a field day.

[Hane]

Steve, better do something about that paunch before it gives you Dunlop's Disease! (That's where your stomach dun lop over your belt buckle.)

Now, I am a certified Plus-Sized[tm][/tm] Person. I am not one to pick on people's personal appearances or dietary habits. But I'll make an exception for Stevehovah. (My only fear is that he'll read here, decide he needs to go on yet-another starvation diet, and force the rest of the Maxhellions to go along for the ride.)

[FloraKitty35]

"Buying used is a blessing." I know that this is a little off topic, but I was watching this talk show called "Hey Qween" on You Tube and the host has a needlepoint on his desk that says: "Every Boner Is A Blessing". My inner twelve year old had to have a little giggle over that. :wink-penguin:

[gardenvarietycitizen]

The Iphones kill me. What the hell do the Maxwells do on a smart phone. All they probably do is call and text each other from their own house and the houses of the married bros. They can't be trusted on the internet so no data needed. No aps as fun is of the devil. You'd think a basic phone would do what they needed.

They probably do have reference apps on their phones - possibly one of their main reasons for buying, I don't know. But there are various Bible apps, concordances, and that sort of thing. Bible calendars. Plus all those fitness apps for checking your pushups and calorie intake and whatever else, schedulers...

I suspect they don't have Angry Birds or the like, though!

Actually now I'm wondering if the Maxwells have ever considered making a MOTH scheduler app. You'd think it'd be right up their alley, considering it's the marriage of IT and MOTH.

[gardenvarietycitizen]

That banner seems really strange to me. Who on earth (well, the Maxwells, I guess) would want a plastic banner up in their entryway to welcome people? It seems more suited to a school or a church than to a family home.

People who have giant gold letters spelling out "J E S U S" in their living rooms, that's who! :D

FWIW they used to have a business of sorts (just another little mini-business hanging off of the Communication Concepts hive) selling banners like this. I have no idea how much business they did, but this was a VERY Maxwell gift.

[Sister_Wife]

I only just woke up, so I'm going to forgive myself.

From just reading this thread, I thought the gifted banner read "Buying Used Is A Blessing".

WTF? But I get it now.

[Cartmann99]

And could someone please explain to me the logic as to why the women have to work out in long skirts in their own damn garage where one one can see them. It is absolutely ridiculous.

Does anyone know if their garage is heated? Also, if exercise is so important to their family, why not add on an exercise room to their house? If they kept it simple, it wouldn't be that expensive to do. :think:

[sparkles]

People who have giant gold letters spelling out "J E S U S" in their living rooms, that's who! :D

FWIW they used to have a business of sorts (just another little mini-business hanging off of the Communication Concepts hive) selling banners like this. I have no idea how much business they did, but this was a VERY Maxwell gift.

Scripture Prints. Totally generic stuff that you can find anywhere. It didn't last long, as I recall, and they ended up trying to sell off the inventory at a discount. They probably give away the remains as gifts.

[gardenvarietycitizen]

They probably give away the remains as gifts.

After all, giving used is a blessing! :D

[Paperplate]

I don't understand what she means about the banner. She's saying it was a Christmas gift, but then she's saying that Joseph got it for Steve when they moved into the house? Huh? I mean, which is it?

Sarah's just bad at expressing herself.

In their current house they have space to hang a banner. When they first moved in, Steve got one from Joseph. Since then he has gotten a new banner every now and then (every Christmas, maybe? idk) to replace the old one.

[MamaJunebug]

Now, I am a certified Plus-Sized[tm][/tm] Person. I am not one to pick on people's personal appearances or dietary habits. But I'll make an exception for Stevehovah. (My only fear is that he'll read here, decide he needs to go on yet-another starvation diet, and force the rest of the Maxhellions to go along for the ride.)

Size 2X here, precisely why I mention Mr. Perfection's pot. Also because he has "protected" his children from his now-conquered habit of emotional eating by ... controlling their lives and food to a troubling degree, just troubling.