Joseph Maxwell & Elissa Frost Got Married! - Part 2

[thoughtful]

The pictures of the horses smoking and drinking (without use of hands/hoofs) are great!

I think one of the illustrations should be two horses sitting on bar stools, one saying, "Who needsh thumbsh, man -- fuck opposhable thumbsh! . . . I gotta tell ya, you are my besht friend -- I love ya, man . . ."

[PearlKrabs]

Several of Christopher's pictures, including the dress one, look more at place in a horror film than a wedding.

ITA. I'm not being snarky when I say the horror movie theme has been clear as I've been looking at the pics.

- the Dutch Tilt. Shots that are taken at an angle can be used to hint to the viewer that something is wrong. Odd angles, like unusually high or low, can be used for this effect, too.

- the sepia tone. Can indicate to the viewer that something is sick or dirty.

- large, unexplained buildings in the background. They seem to hold significance, but we don't know what's inside. It gives an ominous feeling to the action and/or subjects.

- use of shadows/ darkness. Obviously, people are afraid of the dark... including me.

Best example:

When I saw this, my initial thought was The Texas Chainsaw Massacre :shock: I mean, yeah, you can see the steeple in the background, but why is that big farm building in the way...

All of these techniques can be used to make artsy/ beautiful/ cute photographs and that's surely what Copyright Christopher was going for. He just missed the mark in a literally horrifying way.

[thoughtful]

ITA. I'm not being snarky when I say the horror movie theme has been clear as I've been looking at the pics.

- the Dutch Tilt. Shots that are taken at an angle can be used to hint to the viewer that something is wrong. Odd angles, like unusually high or low, can be used for this effect, too.

- the sepia tone. Can indicate to the viewer that something is sick or dirty.

- large, unexplained buildings in the background. They seem to hold significance, but we don't know what's inside. It gives an ominous feeling to the action and/or subjects.

- use of shadows/ darkness. Obviously, people are afraid of the dark... including me.

A lot of them make me think of Hitchcock shots. Look at them again -- can't you just hear the Bernard Herrmann music in the background?

Chris, get creative!

Let's have the bride hang off of George Washington's nose!

How about a sickly green tint, as the bride, dressed to look like the woman you were falling in love with before she fell to her death from a convent bell tower, comes towards you verrrrrrrrry slowwwwwwwly. Yeah, that's romantic.

How about a lovely Victorian house:

[Arete]

I also don't understand why he always takes pictures of parked cars in the church parking lots for all his wedding photography. Who cares what the parking lot looked like? Then once he has a few shots of that, he puts parts of the wedding party in the parking lot. What is so "artsy" about that?

[Coco]

and it helps that Joseph kind of resembles Gomez.

[16strong]

Oh, do tell. What was it?

First off, no thoughtful, it was not that one, lol. :lol: That's actually pretty amazing, though.

And nelliebelle, it was this one:

http://www.amazon.com/Dark-Planet-Charl ... +w.+sasser

I first read it in high school, but it's still on my bookshelf ten years later as a monument to terrible literature everywhere. Unfortunately, it's not terrible in a funny way, or even a moderately good way. It's just plain BAD.

[ILoveJellybeans]

If Sarah and Chris are meant to be talented, I don't want to see examples of the kids who are not talented.

Im surprised the rest of their kids are literate enough to write their own names.

[nelliebelle1197]

If Sarah and Chris are meant to be talented, I don't want to see examples of the kids who are not talented.

Im surprised the rest of their kids are literate enough to write their own names.

I actually think Nathan may be pretty good at his computer business. He has worked as a consultant for years, and the OneTonRamp seems to be more of sideline/Daddy appeasement/business for Jr. Maxwells. Didn't a former coworker come here and dish about how annoying he was?

Someone somewhere somehow is making money in that family. They are far too middle class comfy across the board.

[Savoring Samsara]

Was it this one?

[bBvideo 560,340:11240gsi]

[/bBvideo]

Or this one?

yellandtellbooks.com/color-sara-sue/

Hahahahahaha I knew it was going to be the smoking horse book before I even scrolled down to the video.

[church_of_dog]

Here's mine. I originally heard of it because my ex and I bought a piece of land from the author -- presumably the land where the story takes place.

http://www.amazon.com/Sacred-Mountain-R ... d+river%22

The story is bizarre with jarring, "don't-fit" plot devices, but the worst aspect to me is the grammar and punctuation. A taste of that can be seen from the Amazon summary, where the protagonist's name is spelled two different ways in the first two sentences of the book :shock:

There was also some really odd dialogue style which I've thankfully forgotten the details of -- I think he was trying to find alternatives for the word "said", so he would have '"XXXXX", she opined', and '"VVVVVV", he reviewed', etc.

He also liked to use words whose meaning didn't fit the sentence -- you can see one of the examples in the amazon blurb, when he refers to an "intolerant and disappointing teaching career". Intolerant? What the H does that mean? The book was full of puzzlers like that, very very hard for my anal/literal/proofreader brain to deal with.

And apparently this author used to teach high school English! :doh:

[IReallyAmHopewell]

If Sarah and Chris are meant to be talented, I don't want to see examples of the kids who are not talented.

Im surprised the rest of their kids are literate enough to write their own names.

Not to ever defend the Maxwells but they do use a curriculum for homeschool and it does align with state norms [all of the major Christian publishers do--their materials are also used in private schools who do have student taking tests] They have said before that EVERY math problem, etc, must be done--no frivoulous skipping. So, they can definitely read at or above grade level. That's not the problem. The problem is they've likely read nothing but their textbooks [even those were probably carefully pre-read by mom and dad with post-its covering stuff they don't agree with and no child would DARE look under the post its] and the Bible. Maybe a very, very few books published by other Gothard familes (or stricter). I Imagine Elsie Dinsmore would be too racy though. It's really more a problem of being raised in almost total isolation [unless you count the nursing home residents and occasional "Fellowship" opportunities at like-minded families that are about as free and easy as prison visits].

[Odd1Out]

So I guess we might get the whole wedding and love story by their first anniversary. Are they making sure she sticks around before writing it all out?

[socalrules]

So I guess we might get the whole wedding and love story by their first anniversary. Are they making sure she sticks around before writing it all out?

My guess is that they are taking the time to formulate a love story in order to sell some future book on courtship. I just don't believe that the majority of fundy courtships are based on true love, since they have little time and privacy to get to know someone (not even talking about sex). I think they are based on the belief that you can learn to love anyone, and if you don't, at least you are doing the Lord's work by being fruitful and multiplying.

[Triplet3]

The problem is they've likely read nothing but their textbooks [even those were probably carefully pre-read by mom and dad with post-its covering stuff they don't agree with and no child would DARE look under the post its] and the Bible. Maybe a very, very few books published by other Gothard familes (or stricter). I Imagine Elsie Dinsmore would be too racy though.

Interestingly, I was looking at the Maxwells' site on the Wayback Machine the other day, and at one point they were definitely selling Christian children's fiction (by other authors) as well as their own books. I can't remember the details but I think it was in the late 1990s, possibly early 2000s. It was well before they started their blog.

[Toothfairy]

My guess is that they are taking the time to formulate a love story in order to sell some future book on courtship. I just don't believe that the majority of fundy courtships are based on true love, since they have little time and privacy to get to know someone (not even talking about sex). I think they are based on the belief that you can learn to love anyone, and if you don't, at least you are doing the Lord's work by being fruitful and multiplying.

What can they write about? Wait until Daddy Steve's approves and married you off with someone who is willing to join the Maxwell cult

[Hane]

The first thing I thought when I saw the sepia pic of that dress was "death shroud from hell." Way to take a lovely wedding dress and make it look like used Kleenex.

[Grimalkin]

He also liked to use words whose meaning didn't fit the sentence -- you can see one of the examples in the amazon blurb, when he refers to an "intolerant and disappointing teaching career". Intolerant? What the H does that mean? The book was full of puzzlers like that, very very hard for my anal/literal/proofreader brain to deal with.

And apparently this author used to teach high school English! :doh:

[PearlKrabs]

So I guess we might get the whole wedding and love story by their first anniversary. Are they making sure she sticks around before writing it all out?

I understood drawing out the wedding story into multiple blog posts, I really did. People will keep coming back to see the story and get more exposure to the product.

But this is taking way too long. I'm definitely losing interest in this particular Maxwell adventure. Strike while the iron is hot- they should have done about 3 posts within 2 weeks, IMHO.

It's incredible that they've taken one of their most exciting events to happen in a long time and made it boring.

[clese]

I agree. Now all I want to see is how Elissa copes with her new environment in the compound

[Trynn]

and it helps that Joseph kind of resembles Gomez.

[attachment=0]Addams-Family-Tv-Show-Opening-Credits-addams-family-5705084-500-375.jpg[/attachment]

Yeah, John Astin never could've been lurch. I don't know what the casting director was thinking.

[thoughtful]

But this is taking way too long. I'm definitely losing interest in this particular Maxwell adventure. Strike while the iron is hot- they should have done about 3 posts within 2 weeks, IMHO.

It's incredible that they've taken one of their most exciting events to happen in a long time and made it boring.

Classic Maxwell, isn't it?

I can just imagine the meetings, complete with three corn chips each:

"How can we take this joyous, exciting story, and make it fit our precious idol, Mediocrity?"

[Palimpsest]

I usually just read at Titus2 but God laid it on my heart this morning to take a glance at Christopher's site: ChristopherMaxwell.com.

Someone may have already posted this and I missed it, but Christopher has put a lot more Joseph and Elissa wedding pictures up. I have to say, Teri looks really very nice in her MOG outfit. In other news, it looks like Steve was omnipresent at the wedding even if he didn't actually marry them.

Holy crap though. The overall quality of all Christopher's wedding photography is awful and he did better than usual with Joseph and Elissa. He seems only to photograph 3 or 4 wedding a year. If he thinks the photos in the various portfolios on his site represent the best of his work, I'm really surprised he gets those gigs.

I clicked on a couple of the albums of recent victims of Christopher's "professional" wedding photography. I'm not a good photographer myself and not everyone is "conventionally good looking" or terribly photogenic, so I don't want to snark on the poor brides and grooms (although I'd love to know the back story on Cory and Joy).

Chris seems to have a knack for catching people in unflattering positions. His focus is weird. The lighting is awful, he has no sense of composition, the color and exposure is off and he doesn't seem to know how to correct it.

And there is the sense of impending doom and vertigo inducing Leaning Tower of Pisa buildings that others have already mentioned.

As his wedding photography career isn't booming, Chris also wants to photograph families because:

None of us knows how much longer we have here on earth. As you contemplate the treasure of your family relationships, the question of when you last had a family photo session comes to mind.

Right. Do you know where you will go when you die?

He is also branching out into products and architecture. Those photos are uninspiring too. I hope Steve is paying him properly for the work he does for 1ToNRamp and Concept Communications because Chris surely doesn't earn much from photography.

The funniest thing is that he has a whole section for encouraging amateur photographers because Christopher is a professional. Well, you could have fooled me. I thought Christopher was a very bad amateur!

[Black Aliss]

If Sarah and Chris are meant to be talented, I don't want to see examples of the kids who are not talented.

Im surprised the rest of their kids are literate enough to write their own names.

They are talented in the same way that they are great conversationalists. Which is to say, in the mind of Steve only.

[thoughtful]

As his wedding photography career isn't booming, Chris also wants to photograph families because:

Of course! :roll:

And that isn't even about what God wants, or avoiding Hell. It's more like "you'd better have some pictures taken for those left behind, because you could kick off any second now." Tsk, tsk -- so much concern about the things of this world, Christopher. :penguin-no:

The funniest thing is that he has a whole section for encouraging amateur photographers because Christopher is a professional. Well, you could have fooled me. I thought Christopher was a very bad amateur!

Much worse -- since a few people seem to be deluded enough to pay him for that crap, I guess that means he's a very bad professional.

[SPHASH]

In looking at the rehearsal dinner pics I noticed the church ladies did the meal like at Chris/NR-Annas. I guess after the dinner "fiasco" at Nate/Melanies they don't trust anyone.