Another one bites the dust- Daniel Lockwood MERGE

[salex]

I took her latest post to mean that she was going to tell her story but it is so horrible that she can't think of anyway to spin it to even make it sound slightly good, so she is just going to wait and hope God does something so she can say "We went through all this, but look how God used it for His glory." But currently life just sucks for everyone.

I read her entry today and Freddy Fender's song "Wasted days and wasted nights" came to mind.

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[Howl]

Idle speculation: Daniel is still infatuated with his lover, and is trying to decide if he will stay with Jaynee or return to his paramour.

She will never leave him; her religious beliefs and bazillion kids leave her stuck right there. When she is asking people for prayers for the healing of her marriage and cannot yet tell what the ending will be, indicates to me that things are very very unsettled at this time with no indication whether the marriage will ultimately succeed.

[WonderingInWA]

Idle speculation: Daniel is still infatuated with his lover, and is trying to decide if he will stay with Jaynee or return to his paramour.

She will never leave him; her religious beliefs and bazillion kids leave her stuck right there. When she is asking people for prayers for the healing of her marriage and cannot yet tell what the ending will be, indicates to me that things are very very unsettled at this time with no indication whether the marriage ultimately succeed.

I still think there is a pregnancy involved. Whether the baby has already been born or not, I think there is one and that he is caught either supporting it or adopting it or some other solution. Love can be fallen out of, but the existence of a baby is impossible to deny.

[feministxtian]

I'm betting on a combination of gay lover and domestic violence. He does have a history of beating on Jaynee. Personally, I'd have kicked his ass into next month but that's just me, I'm not an IFB wife.

[WonderingInWA]

I'm betting on a combination of gay lover and domestic violence. He does have a history of beating on Jaynee. Personally, I'd have kicked his ass into next month but that's just me, I'm not an IFB wife.

I thought his abuse of Jaynee was verbal abuse -- I must have missed that it was physical. I do know she's said he hits the kids. Oh, sorry, I believe she said "spank" or perhaps it was "whip", but she has blogged about something one of the kids said once that clearly indicated he physically reprimands the kids by spanking them.

[Savoring Samsara]

That kid that was born in Mexico (age 5) doesn't even speak Spanish! None of the " younger" ones do. I watched a YouTube video where Jaynee was giving an interview with a friend. She said that she and the headship speak Spanish , but then she told the friend how to say " where is the bathroom" in Spanish and she didn't even say it right! Wow, I mean wow. She said that her older children speak Spanish but the younger ones don't . I simply can not imagine that being possible. There are NO other English speaking people in their village and kids learn languages so fast just by playing with kids who speak that language. I guess extreme isolation is the key but what is the goal? Ignorance? Jaynee says that 99% of the time she is at home. I guess keeping everyone at home and isolated would be important to a headship who wants to boink around but still, my mind is blown .

I can't believe the younger kids don't speak Spanish. I'm investing a huge amount of money and time in raising my child to be as close to bilingual as I can manage, and I always envy people who can do that more easily than me. What a terrible waste of an amazing opportunity. Her children have missed out on something that by all rights should have been theirs forever.

[Howl]

I still think there is a pregnancy involved. Whether the baby has already been born or not, I think there is one and that he is caught either supporting it or adopting it or some other solution. Love can be fallen out of, but the existence of a baby is impossible to deny.

I had another thought that perhaps he actually started a second family and was a kid of two into it when he was found out. With a wife tucked safely away at home 99% of the time, it wouldn't be hard to keep it an open secret.

There is something called big house/little house (casa/casita). The big house is where the official wife and kids live. The little house in the poorer part of town is where the mistress lives. I learned this from someone who lived on the US side of the Texas/Mexico border and this was a common pattern for wealthier men, even on the US side, although probably not as common in contemporary culture. I'm sure in a poverty stricken area where they lived that a hunky gringo male who appeared prosperous by their standards would be highly sought after by some women.

[WonderingInWA]

I had another thought that perhaps he actually started a second family and was a kid of two into it when he was found out. With a wife tucked safely away at home 99% of the time, it wouldn't be hard to keep it an open secret.

There is something called big house/little house (casa/casita). The big house is where the official wife and kids live. The little house in the poorer part of town is where the mistress lives. I learned this from someone who lived on the US side of the Texas/Mexico border and this was a common pattern for wealthier men, even on the US side, although probably not as common in contemporary culture. I'm sure in a poverty stricken area where they lived that a hunky gringo male who appeared prosperous by their standards would be highly sought after by some women.

Interesting theory, which reminded me of a gal I worked with at a bank in the early 90s in Las Vegas. She was from Iowa and had met her hispanic boyfriend when she worked for him at a restaurant there (he was the manager). He was married with 5 kids. He decided to move to LV for better pay (or something) so he left his kids and wife behind, but moved HER to LV with him. They lived together for awhile and then his wife decided she wanted to bring the kids out to LV, so he set this gal up in an apartment and paid her rent, then would visit her several times a week, of course. I could never understand how she could put up with it and never knew for sure if his wife knew, but she must have, right? During the 3 years I knew this gal, she got pregnant twice by him and terminated both times. She was 23, he was 40. Interesting -- I haven't thought about that for years.

[Jezebel]

Since this blew up, my hunch has always been that Daniel had a mistress he was supporting with funds meant to support his family and his mission.

I wondered how he might manage that, given that they lived in a small community with few other gringos around; people will notice, and they will talk. But Jaynee's admission that the youngest kids don't speak Spanish both appalled me, and gave me a clue to how that might happen.

If the littles were so isolated from the wider community that they didn't pick up Spanish (and little kids are like sponges when it comes to language--they would have, with everyday exposure), that indicates how isolated and separate Jaynee was from it, as well.

I don't believe there are any children involved (though I wouldn't put it past him to have paid for an abortion, rather than be revealed). Having a mistress and spending mission funds on her are both serious transgressions, and combined would be enough to get him pulled from the mission field. If he'd fathered children outside of his marriage, however, that's bad enough that I would expect him to have to make a full, public confession in exchange for the extra time and support he got so he could bring Jaynee and their kids back to the US.

And Jaynee would have good reason to be depressed, asking for prayers to heal her marriage, and yet unwilling to discuss the sordid details just yet. I'm not sure she could be as dutiful and circumspect as she's been had he fathered another kid with a mistress.

So I think the casa/casita discussion is a very apt one, in this case.

[WonderingInWA]

Since this blew up, my hunch has always been that Daniel had a mistress he was supporting with funds meant to support his family and his mission.

I wondered how he might manage that, given that they lived in a small community with few other gringos around; people will notice, and they will talk. But Jaynee's admission that the youngest kids don't speak Spanish both appalled me, and gave me a clue to how that might happen.

If the littles were so isolated from the wider community that they didn't pick up Spanish (and little kids are like sponges when it comes to language--they would have, with everyday exposure), that indicates how isolated and separate Jaynee was from it, as well.

I don't believe there are any children involved (though I wouldn't put it past him to have paid for an abortion, rather than be revealed). Having a mistress and spending mission funds on her are both serious transgressions, and combined would be enough to get him pulled from the mission field. If he'd fathered children outside of his marriage, however, that's bad enough that I would expect him to have to make a full, public confession in exchange for the extra time and support he got so he could bring Jaynee and their kids back to the US.

And Jaynee would have good reason to be depressed, asking for prayers to heal her marriage, and yet unwilling to discuss the sordid details just yet. I'm not sure she could be as dutiful and circumspect as she's been had he fathered another kid with a mistress.

So I think the casa/casita discussion is a very apt one, in this case.

Also an interesting theory. There really has to be a misappropriation of the church/mission funds to have caused such an uproar, but the fact they supported the family for 3 months and probably paid for their move, that's the baffling part.

The "mountain home" they found doesn't look terribly nice -- not as nice (in my opinion) as their cinderblock home in Mexico, so I hope they aren't paying much for it. It looks clean and she's got everything in its place, but it just looks run down (like the ripple in the carpet in the bedroom with the bunkbeds). I just hope for her sake they have some money to keep everyone fed and that Daniel gets a job and gets the family on their feet. Honestly, there's no reason the oldest boy or two couldn't get jobs unless they are in a really remote area.

[Joan of Snarc]

Wow, that was painful to watch.

And I am agog with prurient interests.

What a fantastic turn of phrase! It should be a post count title!

8-)

[salex]

I had another thought that perhaps he actually started a second family and was a kid of two into it when he was found out. With a wife tucked safely away at home 99% of the time, it wouldn't be hard to keep it an open secret.

There is something called big house/little house (casa/casita). The big house is where the official wife and kids live. The little house in the poorer part of town is where the mistress lives. I learned this from someone who lived on the US side of the Texas/Mexico border and this was a common pattern for wealthier men, even on the US side, although probably not as common in contemporary culture. I'm sure in a poverty stricken area where they lived that a hunky gringo male who appeared prosperous by their standards would be highly sought after by some women.

Not totally uncommon, even today, per my "step mother in law" who is from mexico and has a brother or two who do this (and truth be told, was a version of this with my father in law while he was still married)

If there was a mistress and child or children, I suspect Daniel justified it because his wife could no longer have children, which goes against God's plan of him having many arrows in his quiver. I had a professor (at a secular university) who married a grad student who had 5 kids in 7 years when I knew them.... he considered himself a strict roman catholic, who divorced his wife of 25 years because she hit menopause and couldn't have more kids and he felt he needed/the world deserved more of his own offspring. Completely alienated his kids from his first marriage, but-- in his mind he was doing what his church would want.

I see Daniel Lockwood, if he was having an affair, figuring it wasn't really an affair since his wife was no longer able to have kids. People can justify anything>

[ILoveJellybeans]

I cant believe these people lived in Mexico and the kids cant even speak Spanish! They must have kept them in the house all day or something, kids are good at picking up languages.

I think that it has to be cheating of some sort. He might even have gotten someone pregnant.

[Peas n carrots]

The casa/casita theory is interesting. It might explain why the "sin" hasn't come out yet...for the Lockwood's sponsors, this would be highly embarrassing.

[Prevention]

it's the reluctant Lockwood informant back again.

They are living in a town called Burney, CA. It is about 1 hour from where her family lives in Redding, CA. They had a lot of difficulty finding someone who would rent to them. The house is super tiny---maybe 1/3 of their home in Mexico. It has 3 bedrooms I think, 2 baths. Not sure if they are getting some sort of marital counseling, but I'm sure they are. I will write more when I have more time later.

[Howl]

Thanks for the update, Prevention. Burney does not look like the optimal community for aggressive job hunting for Daniel, but it sounds like a lovely area -- nice environment for the kids.

it's the reluctant Lockwood informant back again.

They are living in a town called Burney, CA. It is about 1 hour from where her family lives in Redding, CA. They had a lot of difficulty finding someone who would rent to them. The house is super tiny---maybe 1/3 of their home in Mexico. It has 3 bedrooms I think, 2 baths. Not sure if they are getting some sort of marital counseling, but I'm sure they are. I will write more when I have more time later.

[Prevention]

Thanks for the update, Prevention. Burney does not look like the optimal community for aggressive job hunting for Daniel, but it sounds like a lovely area -- nice environment for the kids.

It is a nice little town. It has a grocery store and a lumber mill. He will probably not find a job because he will not work Sundays. He's okay with beating on his wife and kids and being immoral, but he would never work on Sundays. That would just be downright unChristian. :roll:

[formergothardite]

He rivals John Shrader, except at least Daniel figured out how to get visas and housing.

[WonderingInWA]

It is a nice little town. It has a grocery store and a lumber mill. He will probably not find a job because he will not work Sundays. He's okay with beating on his wife and kids and being immoral, but he would never work on Sundays. That would just be downright unChristian. :roll:

Well, when he's got 12 little missionaries mouths to feed he just might not end up with a choice. I'm sure God will forgive him for working on Sundays so the kids don't starve.

[Mitz_]

Burney Ca. Looks like a beautiful place, maybe that will cheer Jaynee up a bit. Living in a small community will probably mean that they will get donations of food and clothing like the Duggars used to get before the TLC gravy train arrived, they won't starve but they'll probably be dependent on the kindness of others for a long time to come...but they are used to that. They are fortunate that most people limit their number of blessings so they have a little extra to share with those less fortunate.

Quiverfull is just one huge mindfuck, isn't it?

[gustava]

As nosy as I am, I'm not comfortable with someone posting private information about the Lockwoods, especially as it appears that the poster joined to divulge information.

Snarking is one thing, but the Lockwoods are not public figures, and Jaynee and her children deserve some privacy.

[Prevention]

As nosy as I am, I'm not comfortable with someone posting private information about the Lockwoods, especially as it appears that the poster joined to divulge information.

Snarking is one thing, but the Lockwoods are not public figures, and Jaynee and her children deserve some privacy.

With all due respect, nothing has been posted that isn't readily available on Facebook. I know WAY MORE than I have ever posted and if you don't want to read it then stop following this thread. My intentions are solely to inform those who care about Jaynee and the kids who have followed their blog for years and to blow off some steam about the situation just like everyone else.

[church_of_dog]

Burney is a cute town -- I live within a couple hours of there.

In another life I might have really enjoyed living there, but in my transition from urban living to rural living, I quickly got to a point where that was "too close to civilization" for me. I mean, heck, they have a McDonalds! And two stop lights!

However I do pass through Burney a few times a year when I venture out into the world -- will have to keep an eye out for them.

[WonderingInWA]

With all due respect, nothing has been posted that isn't readily available on Facebook. I know WAY MORE than I have ever posted and if you don't want to read it then stop following this thread. My intentions are solely to inform those who care about Jaynee and the kids who have followed their blog for years and to blow off some steam about the situation just like everyone else.

Waaaaait a minute, stop the presses -- the Lockwoods are on Facebook? How did I miss this? Oh, do tell...

[gustava]

With all due respect, nothing has been posted that isn't readily available on Facebook. I know WAY MORE than I have ever posted and if you don't want to read it then stop following this thread. My intentions are solely to inform those who care about Jaynee and the kids who have followed their blog for years and to blow off some steam about the situation just like everyone else.

I was expressing my position, not hitting you over the head with a baseball bat. Is it a public FB page? If so, I'd like to follow it.