Lori thinks it's okay to hit a 5 month old with a switch

[meda]

I have a 5 month old. Not only can I not fathom hitting him with anything, (because I am not a demented hillbilly child beater and thus see that hitting something that small,helpless and fragile is a bad thing) but my son is also not trying to climb any stairs. Can any 5 month olds climb stairs? Mine has just mastered rolling over and giggling while drooling. Wanton stairclimbing disobedience is not yet in his repertoire. Maybe the Pearl children developed faster in an effort to escape their parents.

[thoughtful]

I have a 5 month old. Not only can I not fathom hitting him with anything, (because I am not a demented hillbilly child beater and thus see that hitting something that small,helpless and fragile is a bad thing) but my son is also not trying to climb any stairs. Can any 5 month olds climb stairs? Mine has just mastered rolling over and giggling while drooling. Wanton stairclimbing disobedience is not yet in his repertoire. Maybe the Pearl children developed faster in an effort to escape their parents.

According to the Pearls, it was four months!

One of our girls who developed mobility early had a fascination with crawling up the stairs. At four months she was too unknowing to be punished for disobedience. But for her own good, we attempted to train her not to climb the stairs by coordinating the voice command of "No" with little spats on the bare legs. The switch was a twelve-inch long, one-eighth-inch diameter sprig from a willow tree.

Such was her fascination with climbing that four or five sessions had not made her stop. The thought of further spankings was disconcerting, so I conceived an alternative. After one more spanking, I laid the switch on the bottom step. We later observed her crawl to the stairs and start the ascent, only to halt at the first step and stare at the switch. She backed off and never again attempted to climb the stairs, even after the switch was removed.

web.archive.org/web/20101104141241/http://www.achristianhome.com/to_train_up_a_child.htm

[debrand]

Does Lori not believe in vaccination?

Jill York · 1 day ago

I agree and love the connection you made between vaccinations and using a little switch! Parents that vaccinate choose to allow some pain because they feel they are protecting their children. Same thing with parents that choose to switch their children to keep them from harm. I'm going to use this one for sure. ;)

Lori Alexander · 1 day ago

I like your series on vaccinations, Jill. We never felt comfortable vaccinating our children after carefully studying both sides.

Report

[dairyfreelife]

Does Lori not believe in vaccination?

Wondered the same. I thought she was against vaccines cause Mercola says so.

[dilannsmom]

If you are a parent and do not spank your children or if you grew up in a non-spanking household, please answer the following questions:

1. Do your children (you) run into the street in front of cars?

2. Do your children (you) put their fingers in light sockets?

3. Are your children (you) generally polite/well-mannered in company?

4. Are your adult children (you) gainfully employed or seeking higher education?

5. Are your older children (you) currently drug addicts?

6. Are your school-age children (you) toilet trained?

1. No--cuz I held her hand in fucking parking lots! And we talked about why it is important to hold hands and watch for big heavy cars!

2. No--cuz I covered that shit up with a pack of $5 light socket covers. Those things are made for a reason!

3. She is AMAZINGly polite and well-mannered because she has been treated like a PERSON!

4. She is planning on Stanford--has been since she was 7.

5. The girl is afraid to take an asprin...

6. Um--yeah. She got a handle on that. Told me she wanted big girl panties and not a single accident.

But, perhaps the most important question to ask is:

7. How would your child (you) describe your relationship with your parents?

I know that my relationship with both of my parents is strained. While I care about them and their wellbeing, I'm not sure that I can say that I truly love them. I don't readily talk to them about life, life choices, hopes, dreams, etc. I would argue that they don't really know me or understand me. I think that being "spanked" has a lot to do with the state of our relationship--I was often worried that sharing my thoughts and such would lead to being spanked.

Although I'm pretty sure that my 13 year old daughter wouldn't say our relationship is "perfect," and I'm pretty sure that she would criticize some of the decisions that I have made...I would feel pretty comfortable saying that I know who she is, and this comes from the fact that we have an open and healthy relationship. Are there times that we disagree...there are times that we argue. BUT, she knows that she doesn't have to fear telling me things because I won't smak the shit out of her with a leather belt.

[Trynn]

:)

I was spanked as a child. Not obsessively like the pearls, and it stopped at around age ten or 11, but I still think spamking messed me up/ I think the verbal/emotional abuse was worse, personally. So here's how I turned out:

1. If there's no crosswalk and the bus came early and I need to catch it, yes. Otherwise, hell no.

2. Never had he desire todo that, no.

3. Depends in the company. As an adult, I'm having to parent myself in that respect.

4. I am employed, thous I'd like to work more than I am. I've been unable to finish school and am a dropout. Most of my adult life has been spent unemployed because I lack social skills and impulse control (in combination with the wretched economy).

5. Not at the moment, though I do a lot of experimenting and if I could I'd probably be perpetually stoned

6. Um, yes.

See, I was spanked as a child, look how I turned out!

[Melissa1977]

Let's do a completely non-scientific FJ poll to see if it is possible to raise normal, functional adults without spanking...

If you are a parent and do not spank your children or if you grew up in a non-spanking household, please answer the following questions:

1. Do your children (you) run into the street in front of cars?

2. Do your children (you) put their fingers in light sockets?

3. Are your children (you) generally polite/well-mannered in company?

4. Are your adult children (you) gainfully employed or seeking higher education?

5. Are your older children (you) currently drug addicts?

6. Are your school-age children (you) toilet trained?

I was smacked (not often, but I hated that). I promised myself never hit my children.

My answers are:

1. Do your children (you) run into the street in front of cars? NO. NEVER. But of course I don't leave them walking free on the streets. That's what parents do: take kids by the hand to control they doesn't run.

2. Do your children (you) put their fingers in light sockets? NO. NEVER. I proof the light sockets when there are babies/toddlers at home. When they grow up, they know that electricity is dangerous and don't touch it.

3. Are your children (you) generally polite/well-mannered in company? YES. Not because they're scared, but because we explain them that people is happier when we are polite. It's not easy, it takes a lot of patience. But it works.

I was forced to be polite, I was polite because I was scared of being hit and I was very shy and it took me a lot of years to have good social skills.

4. Are your adult children (you) gainfully employed or seeking higher education? My children are little. But they like study.

I went to university.

5. Are your older children (you) currently drug addicts? I was smacked and I had a strict education (but a gentle one comparing to fundies!) and I had eating disorders and other bad habits. Surprinsingly, my son who is 8, can control himself in no eating too much sweets.

6. Are your school-age children (you) toilet trained? Of course they are!!!!

I had a lot of potty training problems as a toddler. My mother was very hard with this issue and I still remember that.

I can see a lot of differences between my own childhood and my children childhood. The lack od fear makes you more self confident, more clever and happier.

[lilwriter85]

Did that crazy bitch seriously compare getting vaccinated to hitting a baby? :wtf: :angry-cussingblack: :angry-banghead: Her father is a fucking doctor! She should know better! :angry-screaming:

She has bashed vaccinations before and I have always been puzzled about her stance especially since her father was a pathologist.

[Koala]

I truly think it's so important that messages like these are out there to counter the "I was spanked, and I turned out just fine!" bullshit.

I too was "spanked" as a child- with belts, switches, paddles, shoes, and just about anything else my mom or grandparents could think of. I was even slapped in the face a couple of times and pinched on the legs by one of my mother's husbands. They loved me...they tried their best. In a lot of areas they did really good. But the hitting? That fucked me up in ways that can never be repaired. And these are not what people would think of as "bad parents/grandparents". Anyone would have told you I was well taken care of and loved. They just simply did not know a better way, and so they hit.

As a result of that and one other factor in my childhood, I went buck wild in my preteen years and was into more trouble than my mother ever knew about or could keep up with. When I was ready I straightened myself out, but not until I was damn well ready. The hitting ironically made me very stubborn and independent. I remember one day one of her husbands hit me and I told him if her ever laid another hand on me I would call CPS. That was the beginning of me setting some boundaries around myself. I will never forget him asking me if I would actually do that to him (call CPS) after he provided a home for me. The answer was hell yes. He never hit me after that (although my mom did), but he was gone a few months later.

I am able to maintain a very close friendship with my mom, but it is a friendship. I am not capable of thinking of her in a capacity in which she could have any sort of control over me. I have a difficult time forming attachments and close bonds. I do not like to be touched and I need a very large circle of space to feel comfortable. I don't like looking at belts...at all. I don't even like to say the word. My husband has exactly 2 (brown and black) and he is gracious enough not to ask why I always tuck them into a drawer at night- I think he must have figured out it was so I don't have to look at them.

When I got married I made goddamn sure ahead of time that my husband did not believe in hitting (spanking). We were both committed from the get go to never hit our kids and we never have. Never will. Honestly, I am so proud of my kids. They are such good people and I take great comfort that they have never known a moments fear of their parents.

So Lori, the next time you are telling the world how your kids are okay? Don't. Because to this day my mom doesn't know that her hitting is a large part of the reason I am as unreachable as I am. What's in the past is done and I can tell she regrets what she did- I won't hurt her by telling her that she has damaged me in ways I can't repair. When I post anti-spanking studies on fb she always "likes" them and she is very proud of the way my children have been raised. That's enough for me.

[Koala]

She has bashed vaccinations before and I have always been puzzled about her stance especially since her father was a pathologist.

She's against too much medical intervention until she's the one that needs it. Bring on Polio! Dr. Lori says it's totally safe. You can treat it with some Miracle Salve she bought online! :roll:

[2xx1xy1JD]

Let's do a completely non-scientific FJ poll to see if it is possible to raise normal, functional adults without spanking...

If you are a parent and do not spank your children or if you grew up in a non-spanking household, please answer the following questions:

1. Do your children (you) run into the street in front of cars?

2. Do your children (you) put their fingers in light sockets?

3. Are your children (you) generally polite/well-mannered in company?

4. Are your adult children (you) gainfully employed or seeking higher education?

5. Are your older children (you) currently drug addicts?

6. Are your school-age children (you) toilet trained?

1. No. We lived in a downtown apartment on an extremely busy street when baby #1 came along, so I made a firm rule that she had to be holding my hand whenever we walked out of the apartment. Neither dh nor I run into traffic.

2. No and no.

3. Yes, very much so. They are also well-behaved even when I'm not around to threaten a spanking. Dh and I behave in public too.

4. The oldest is only 14, but they are all doing well at school and aspire to it. If Ken really wants to go the bragging route because one of his kids is a dentist, I'll mention that I'm a lawyer and my inlaws' 4 kids became a rheumatologist, cardiologist, dentist and social worker.

5. No and no.

6. Yes and yes.

If you read Proverbs in context, it's not just urging beating for the sake of inflicting pain. It's about the goal of raising children who will do the right thing. If you are going to quote Proverbs 23:13-14, at least read Proverbs 23:1-2, and ask yourself if you believe that God is literally commanding someone who is hungry to stab themselves in the throat at a state dinner. If not, consider that this is a book which uses some exaggerated language to make a point. Also, what about the Golden Rule and the Love Thy Neighbor commandments? If spanking and not spanking can both be effective, how can spanking be justified? Discipline - even it is unpleasant - for the sake of raising a child that does the right thing can be justified. Inflicting pain when it is not necessary, just for the sake of convenience or habit? I can't see how that doesn't violate the other Biblical commands.

[Koala]

Of course Ken wasn't done talking about it:

lorialexander.blogspot.com/2014/01/a-sensible-approach-to-spanking.html

[docmom]

Of course Ken wasn't done talking about it:

lorialexander.blogspot.com/2014/01/a-sensible-approach-to-spanking.html

Here's Ken's alternative to hitting the 5 month old with a stick:

Sure there are other ways to accomplish training a small child and we are all for using them. Hold the baby’s nose if you like, or withhold nursing the baby when they bite,

Small infants are nose breathers, while they can breath through their mouths they prefer to breath through their noses and studies suggest it is very uncomfortable for them to have to mouth breath. Trust Ken to suggest suffocating an infant as a viable alternative to hitting them.

[Koala]

Here's Ken's alternative to hitting the 5 month old with a stick:

Small infants are nose breathers, while they can breath through their mouths they prefer to breath through their noses and studies suggest it is very uncomfortable for them to have to mouth breath. Trust Ken to suggest suffocating an infant as a viable alternative to hitting them.

I hope they both get dumped in shitty nursing homes and treated just as they have treated their children.

[docmom]

I hope they both get dumped in shitty nursing homes and treated just as they have treated their children.

Yes, I can see one of the kids standing on Ken's oxygen tubing...

[Koala]

Yes, I can see one of the kids standing on Ken's oxygen tubing...

I knew they had raised at least on person just as disturbed as they are when she posted the "Emma is not boss" post.

Ryan made Emma's breakfast this morning. He started feeding it to her. After one bite she said, "No!" Ryan made her eat at least 20 bites between her crying.

Erin told me that when they eat dinner, Emma begs for their food. Ryan didn't like that so he set a blanket down and made Emma sit on it with her toys and books while they ate. For a week, she would just sit there and scream. Then she would just cry. Now when he lays the blanket down, she crawls over to it and plays happily while they eat. She knows her daddy is boss and means what he says.

[latraviata]

I knew they had raised at least on person just as disturbed as they are when she posted the "Emma is not boss" post.

Dressage, plain and simple. Disgusting! At least a horse gets a sugar lump and an attaboy!!

[Koala]

Someone posted a very kind, well written comment last night pointing out that she had read articles by the Pearls AND TTUAC, and while she liked the fact that they laugh and smile often it concerns her that they seem to be at war with children. She went on to point out that the child that they hit was 4 months. Lori or Ken deleted it promptly. I wonder why they feel the need to lie and add an extra month. The text is easily available.

At four months she was too unknowing to be punished for disobedience. But for her own good, we attempted to train her not to climb the stairs by coordinating the voice command of “No†with little spats on the bare legs. The switch was a twelve-inch long, one-eighth-inch diameter sprig from a willow tree.

A 4 month old. Climbing the stairs. Yeah. It can be found on pg. 9 of their book. Don't lie Lori. It's a sin according to your holy book.

[lilwriter85]

The incident of Ryan force feeding his daughter still gives me chills. I think the only kid who may break out of Lori and Ken's beliefs is the other son Steven. Lori's married daughter seems to following the submissive fundie wife belief and the other daughter who recently got engaged seems to headed on the Lori path.

[ILoveJellybeans]

Erin told me that when they eat dinner, Emma begs for their food. Ryan didn't like that so he set a blanket down and made Emma sit on it with her toys and books while they ate. For a week, she would just sit there and scream. Then she would just cry. Now when he lays the blanket down, she crawls over to it and plays happily while they eat. She knows her daddy is boss and means what he says.

Why not make some extra for her, if she is old enough for solid food and is willing to try it?

Better than blanket training, and it will encourage her to try new foods.

[Hisey]

It can be messy and noisy to eat with a baby, but that is part of being a parent. It can also be fun if you interact with them and --gasp!-- actually let them try what you are eating, if it is soft enough. What is the big deal about letting a baby eat dinner with the parents?

[latraviata]

It can be messy and noisy to eat with a baby, but that is part of being a parent. It can also be fun if you interact with them and --gasp!-- actually let them try what you are eating, if it is soft enough. What is the big deal about letting a baby eat dinner with the parents?

We always had dinner with the babies. We loved it and it gives this relaxed, special, family feeling. The babies in a high chair with some plastic on the floor, they loved to imitate us. First we fed them with a spoon, then they wanted to eat with their hands, the next step using a spoon. I couldn't care less about the mess they made. We had fun and I am convinced it really helped to let them eat almost everything and an overture to nice sociable children/adults.

[frumper-rump]

Let's do a completely non-scientific FJ poll to see if it is possible to raise normal, functional adults without spanking...

If you are a parent and do not spank your children or if you grew up in a non-spanking household, please answer the following questions:

1. Do your children (you) run into the street in front of cars?

2. Do your children (you) put their fingers in light sockets?

3. Are your children (you) generally polite/well-mannered in company?

4. Are your adult children (you) gainfully employed or seeking higher education?

5. Are your older children (you) currently drug addicts?

6. Are your school-age children (you) toilet trained?

My answers (for my children- my parents were occasional spankers) are:

1. no

2. no

3. yes

4. N/A

5. no

6. yes

My teenager- not spanked as a child

1. Do your children (you) run into the street in front of cars? no

2. Do your children (you) put their fingers in light sockets? no

3. Are your children (you) generally polite/well-mannered in company? yes

4. Are your adult children (you) gainfully employed or seeking higher education? n/a

5. Are your older children (you) currently drug addicts? no

6. Are your school-age children (you) toilet trained? yes

Me- spanked as a child

1. Do your children (you) run into the street in front of cars? no

2. Do your children (you) put their fingers in light sockets? no

3. Are your children (you) generally polite/well-mannered in company? yes

4. Are your adult children (you) gainfully employed or seeking higher education? yes

5. Are your older children (you) currently drug addicts? no

6. Are your school-age children (you) toilet trained? yes

My brother- spanked as a child

1. Do your children (you) run into the street in front of cars? no

2. Do your children (you) put their fingers in light sockets? no

3. Are your children (you) generally polite/well-mannered in company? yes

4. Are your adult children (you) gainfully employed or seeking higher education? not until he was nearing 30 years old

5. Are your older children (you) currently drug addicts? yes

6. Are your school-age children (you) toilet trained? yes

[moodygirl86]

Let's do a completely non-scientific FJ poll to see if it is possible to raise normal, functional adults without spanking...

If you are a parent and do not spank your children or if you grew up in a non-spanking household, please answer the following questions:

1. Do your children (you) run into the street in front of cars?

2. Do your children (you) put their fingers in light sockets?

3. Are your children (you) generally polite/well-mannered in company?

4. Are your adult children (you) gainfully employed or seeking higher education?

5. Are your older children (you) currently drug addicts?

6. Are your school-age children (you) toilet trained?

My answers (for my children- my parents were occasional spankers) are:

1. no

2. no

3. yes

4. N/A

5. no

6. yes

1) I can't remember any of us running out in front of cars, as Mum explained to us why this was dangerous.

2) Ditto electric sockets

3) Over the holidays, me and my brother visited Mum, along with her good friend/neighbour of 30 years. This woman texted Mum afterwards to say "Thanks for including me in your Christmas celebrations. Your kids are really nice and polite!"

4) Eldest brother is gainfully employed as a care worker (homeless/drug addicted youths), middle bro is a security guard. Youngest is a mechanic. We'll probably lose points in that we all left school at 16 rather than doing further education, and I'm currently unemployed and claiming the evil dole, though I'm looking for work and have an interview tomorrow.

5) Not drug addicts in the ordinarily accepted sense of the word, though Lori would probably look down on E and M, as they have both taken antidepressants/anxiety meds. We all enjoy a drink, except J who hasn't had an alcoholic beverage since 2009, and I couldn't live without my caffeine fixes. I'll unashamedly pop a couple of Anadin Extra if I have a bad period pain.

6) No history of incontinence as adults.

[twinmama]

I knew they had raised at least on person just as disturbed as they are when she posted the "Emma is not boss" post.

How do you MAKE a child eat 20 bites of any thing? I have two 2 year olds and if they don't want it, no amount of cajoling will get food into their mouth, chewed and swallowed. I've tricked them into opening up for a carrot (when they automatically open assuming it's another bite of yogurt or something, not real intentional trickery on my part), but they won't continue to chew and swallow once they realize. He must be holding her mouth open and stuffing food in forcibly. Disgusting. And way to create crazy issues about food with your child.