Lori thinks it's okay to hit a 5 month old with a switch

[Koala]

Cold shower lady responded again:

Not with her, we tried hand, and although I was against it belt, wooden spoon, cane everything she would just keep going, I stopped after I thought I broke her arm... And tried other ways. The shower was the only thing that gave her pause...

So she hit her with her hand, a belt, a wooden spoon, and then a cane. When she thought she had broken her arm she decided a cold shower was a good punishment. This lady belongs in jail.

[latraviata]

Cold shower lady responded again:

So she hit her with her hand, a belt, a wooden spoon, and then a cane. When she thought she had broken her arm she decided a cold shower was a good punishment. This lady belongs in jail.

And yet children are blessings.......

[GeoBQn]

She flip-flops from "striking a kid with a twig doesn't really hurt them" to "spanking doesn't work unless it hurts."

When I or other FJers comment on fundie blogs en masse, I sometimes wonder what the goal is. With other blogs, I guess I hope that the blogger thinks harder about what she is saying, and possibly changes her behavior.

With Lori, I hope that she gets flooded with so many negative comments that she finally decides that it isn't worth it and takes it down. I want her presence gone from the Internet so that her advice will not kill someone or cause irreparable psychological damage. But at this point, what could she possibly write about that would make everyone turn on her? Even when she gets overwhelming criticism from readers for saying that it is ok to hurt babies and stay in an abusive relationship, she deletes the bad comments, some people still agree with her, and she keeps going on her merry way.

[thoughtful]

I wish I could be shocked or surprised, but I am not.

The cognitive dissonance of "c'mon, how much could a little switch hurt?" and "it has to hurt to work, and if it doesn't, whip harder" is totally predictable with people with this confrontational mindset. And so is escalating/varying the pain with things like cold showers.

She's a monster, and there are other monsters like her out there. :cry:

[ILoveJellybeans]

Holy shit, she nearly broke her kid's arm, and beats her with spoons, canes, belts and throws her in a cold shower??? What a horrible mother.

How old is the child? I have visions of her being a toddler

[Minerva]

And yet children are blessings.......

Something I've noticed about fundies (and not-quite fundies whose beliefs are just as scary) is that they think you can excuse any behaviour by invoking love. They'll assault a kid for no good reason, but it's ok because they do it out of love. They'll take away your right to marry/adopt/see your partner on their death bed, but it can't be wrong because they love you. It's a massively lazy justification, but apparently it works. It only applies to them, though. Love doesn't excuse doing things they disagree with, like getting your tubes tied when you have as many kids as you can handle.

[docmom]

Not with her, we tried hand, and although I was against it belt, wooden spoon, cane everything she would just keep going, I stopped after I thought I broke her arm... And tried other ways. The shower was the only thing that gave her pause...

This is making me literally sick. That poor, poor kid. I'm pretty sure this is something no god would condone. Jesus didn't say "suffer the little children to come unto me, but make them really suffer first"

Going home to hug my kids...

[dawbs]

*snip*

Something I've noticed about fundies (and not-quite fundies whose beliefs are just as scary) is that they think you can excuse any behaviour by invoking love. They'll assault a kid for no good reason, but it's ok because they do it out of love. They'll take away your right to marry/adopt/see your partner on their death bed, but it can't be wrong because they love you. It's a massively lazy justification, but apparently it works. It only applies to them, though. Love doesn't excuse doing things they disagree with, like getting your tubes tied when you have as many kids as you can handle.

There's a Christian (fundie? no idea) comedian who does a bit on learning that God 'liked' him when he was a kid. Before that, he had only heard God 'LOVED" him--and that's all well and good, but we all 'love' great aunt gertrude, but we'd rather smash our head into a wall than spend time with her [my paraphrasing, he was much gentler :lol: ]. (HA, remembered the name--mike lowry. I have the CD someplace :lol: )

Always resonated with me.

I love my kid. And that's important. In parenting, the trying to do the right thing with love is a good thing.

But know what is awesome?

I LIKE my kid.

That doesn't mean that I don't have my days (oh lordy do I have my days) when she drives me nuts and that I louse it up and that my response to her is "REALLY CHILD? For the love of protons, stop being so needy or I will be forced to sacrifice goats to Odin to release frost giants upon us" (Okay, probably not quite that but, close enough).

But, genuinely, I like her. She's a neat person--and I just enjoy the things she does on a day to day basis, and spending time with her (after I've had my coffee. I may have not enjoyed her at 4:40 this morning). It's...awesome. I like her and I'm lucky to have her in my life--and super lucky to get to parent her.

It's kinda like...I had the world's most amazing grandparents. I know, everyone says that, butI know I was damn lucky to be able to know them--because they truly were amazing, wonderful, awesome human beings who did amazing things in the world. And I was a step luckier, I was lucky enough to be their granddaughter. I loved them, as their granddaughter. But it goes beyond the social and familial obligations--I LIKE them as people.

And that's something that fundies seem to miss--that loving them is all well and good, but liking them and celebrating who they are is amazing.

[BoomerLynn]

And yet children are blessings.......

:cry: :cry: :cry:

[lilwriter85]

Does anyone remember the fundie lite blogger who spoke against spanking? It was a year or two ago and it was discussed here.

[2xx1xy1JD]

I post my comments not to change Lori's mind (aint going to happen), but to hopefully show her fans another way.

She's locked in this mindset of seeing everything as a power struggle. Marital problems? Someone needs to be in charge, and you need to submit. Anything at all involving children? They need to be punished until they can be obedient.

I don't think that she's deliberately creating strawman arguments. I think that SHE actually thinks that egalitarian marriages look like hers did before she decided to be submissive, and she thinks that parents who don't spank are going crazy running after kids who ignore them.

Look, I'm too lazy to constantly battle my kids...which is part of the reason that I don't do that. My relationship with my kids is my most powerful parenting tool. Lori's methods would have threatened that. Spanking a child that got out of bed may have given me a bit more time to myself when my oldest was younger. It would have also given me a child who learned to be afraid of me, and who didn't automatically look to me for comfort and who didn't automatically want to lie down and talk about her deepest thoughts with me. Kids grow up, and learn to sleep on their own, regardless of what method of discipline you use. They don't have close relationships with parents, though. I can't police my teen 24/7. I can have a good relationship with her, where she feels close to us and knows that she can tell me anything. Last night, I got to bed a bit late, because she was talking to me about her weekend away with her school and the deep programs that they had.

[Micah]

There's a Christian (fundie? no idea) comedian who does a bit on learning that God 'liked' him when he was a kid. Before that, he had only heard God 'LOVED" him--and that's all well and good, but we all 'love' great aunt gertrude, but we'd rather smash our head into a wall than spend time with her [my paraphrasing, he was much gentler :lol: ]. (HA, remembered the name--mike lowry. I have the CD someplace :lol: )

Always resonated with me.

I love my kid. And that's important. In parenting, the trying to do the right thing with love is a good thing.

But know what is awesome?

I LIKE my kid.

That doesn't mean that I don't have my days (oh lordy do I have my days) when she drives me nuts and that I louse it up and that my response to her is "REALLY CHILD? For the love of protons, stop being so needy or I will be forced to sacrifice goats to Odin to release frost giants upon us" (Okay, probably not quite that but, close enough).

But, genuinely, I like her. She's a neat person--and I just enjoy the things she does on a day to day basis, and spending time with her (after I've had my coffee. I may have not enjoyed her at 4:40 this morning). It's...awesome. I like her and I'm lucky to have her in my life--and super lucky to get to parent her.

It's kinda like...I had the world's most amazing grandparents. I know, everyone says that, butI know I was damn lucky to be able to know them--because they truly were amazing, wonderful, awesome human beings who did amazing things in the world. And I was a step luckier, I was lucky enough to be their granddaughter. I loved them, as their granddaughter. But it goes beyond the social and familial obligations--I LIKE them as people.

And that's something that fundies seem to miss--that loving them is all well and good, but liking them and celebrating who they are is amazing.

This! My son is an amazing human being. Yes he can be full on and has me wanting to rip my hair out some days, but he's a six year old boy. That's how he's SUPPOSED to be. He talks to me about his fears and worries. He knows he can negotiate with me about some things and boy can he negotiate! He was running around madly inside once, pretending to be The Doctor (he's a massive Doctor Who fan). I was tired and he was making a massive racket, so I asked him to go outside. The first time he pretended not to hear me, the second time I told him he was heading for a time out if he didn't do as he was asked. He marched over to me, hands on hips, full of attitude, "Mum! If I take the Tardis out there, she'll rip a hole in the fabric of time! Do you want that? Well, do you!?!" I nearly fell on the floor laughing.

Fundy and other pro hardline discipline parents must miss out on so much beauty and fun with their children. :cry:

[Loveday]

I think this reply from Lori to a commenter says it all, unfortunately:

"The rod made child raising a pleasure for us and works quickly to accomplish its goal."

:?

[dilannsmom]

This! My son is an amazing human being. Yes he can be full on and has me wanting to rip my hair out some days, but he's a six year old boy. That's how he's SUPPOSED to be. He talks to me about his fears and worries. He knows he can negotiate with me about some things and boy can he negotiate! He was running around madly inside once, pretending to be The Doctor (he's a massive Doctor Who fan). I was tired and he was making a massive racket, so I asked him to go outside. The first time he pretended not to hear me, the second time I told him he was heading for a time out if he didn't do as he was asked. He marched over to me, hands on hips, full of attitude, "Mum! If I take the Tardis out there, she'll rip a hole in the fabric of time! Do you want that? Well, do you!?!" I nearly fell on the floor laughing.

Fundy and other pro hardline discipline parents must miss out on so much beauty and fun with their children. :cry:

SOOOOOOO this. My dad was the hitter...but my mom would often tell me that she loved me, but didn't like me very much. That may have actually been worse than being hit.

Really, my parenting philosophy and my high school classroom management philosphies are pretty much the same--win the war, not the battle. So what if my 2 year old got up for a glass of water after I put her to bed? One more reason to kiss and hug on her when I tucked her back in. So what if I have 2 11th graders that sit on the floor during class--they are paying attention and can answer any question throw at them.

[latraviata]

I think this reply from Lori to a commenter says it all, unfortunately:

"The rod made child raising a pleasure for us and works quickly to accomplish its goal."

:?

This is bloody awful!!!!

[Loveday]

This is bloody awful!!!!

It gets worse. :? Someone named Stacie posted the following: "Lori--I'm trying to make sense of a few of your comments. Do I understand correctly that you hit your young children (5 and under) with a leather strap? Just want to make sure I understand correctly, as you said that most of the "spanking" was done with children 5 and younger and that you believed in using a leather strap and making sure that it hurt."

To which Lori replied: "I am not going to answer you since you changed the word "spank" to a derogatory word "hit" which makes it sound like abuse. Spanking a child for disobedience on the bottom is completely different from the way you define it when saying the word "hit." You don't agree with spanking a child as the Bible commands so you aren't really interested in what we did. "

I'm so appalled by this whole thing I can't even think straight right now. :angry-banghead:

[salex]

SHe's more or less my age, and by now I'm so sick of her that I dont' care how she was raised in regard to spanking, I don't care if Ken beats her for his pleasure, hers or both, I dont' care if she was such a cast iron bitch that Ken could barely tolerate her until she became passive aggressive and submissive. I don't care if she has hot sex fantasies about being beaten by the Pearls. I dont' care if it is her brain tumor makes her nutty.

I simply wish silence and oblivion from her. I am dumfounded that anyone goes to her evil blog. I won't ever click on it, the reviews here are enough to make me puke.

She is a whited sepulchre, in my opinion, and one of the nastiest bloggers we ever discuss. I think the person who said earlier she attracts miserable women and tells them to submit to assholes, and take out their rage on their kids. If she did as she preached, I fervently await the Mommy Dearest book from one of her kids, and I hope it comes out before the tumor gets her.

[dilannsmom]

It gets worse. :? Someone named Stacie posted the following: "Lori--I'm trying to make sense of a few of your comments. Do I understand correctly that you hit your young children (5 and under) with a leather strap? Just want to make sure I understand correctly, as you said that most of the "spanking" was done with children 5 and younger and that you believed in using a leather strap and making sure that it hurt."

To which Lori replied: "I am not going to answer you since you changed the word "spank" to a derogatory word "hit" which makes it sound like abuse. Spanking a child for disobedience on the bottom is completely different from the way you define it when saying the word "hit." You don't agree with spanking a child as the Bible commands so you aren't really interested in what we did. "

I'm so appalled by this whole thing I can't even think straight right now. :angry-banghead:

I'm impressed she even published my question--I really didn't think it would see the light of day! (And I really want an answer...because even my dad held off on the belt until I was in the double digits.)

[Loveday]

I'm impressed she even published my question--I really didn't think it would see the light of day! (And I really want an answer...because even my dad held off on the belt until I was in the double digits.)

That was you? Bravo for asking the question! I wish she'd answered you, too, I'd love to see her floundering around for justification for such despicable behavior.

I wonder if she'll get Ken to respond to you--brace yourself for some patriarchal chastisement. :roll:

[fundiefan]

I think it's okay to hit Lori with a very large switch many, many times.

[Loveday]

I think it's okay to hit Lori with a very large switch many, many times.

Post of the week this is, yep. :clap: :clap: :clap:

[dilannsmom]

That was you? Bravo for asking the question! I wish she'd answered you, too, I'd love to see her floundering around for justification for such despicable behavior.

I wonder if she'll get Ken to respond to you--brace yourself for some patriarchal chastisement. :roll:

And I say to Ken: "Bring it!" (But please leave your whips, chains, belts, twigs and other kinky shit at home!) My OSSO has yet to tame my wild Irish temper (although he loves to try). I'm not afraid of Lori's big creepy bear.

[thoughtful]

Ah, yes, another predictable bit of "rod" bullshit. For some reason, "hit" is a forbidden word.

I guess the dictionary is wrong:

1.

a. To come into contact with forcefully; strike: The car hit the guardrail.

b. To reach with or as if with a blow: The bullet hit the police officer in the shoulder.

2.

a. To cause to come into contact: She hit her hand against the wall.

b. To deal a blow to.

I want to know what these people picture when they hear the word "hit" - a punch with a fist? A flat-handed smack?

[NotALoserLikeYou]

I hate Lori. I'm sickened.

[Koala]

Why am I not surprised that this all came around to wife spanking??

Ken:

In most cases any spanking would probably lead to a lot of laughs, or great sex, or both, but if that helps a husband get his point across, he needs to be sure it is consensual or it is worthless apart from a true desire to please and submit.

In other words, make sure you don't wind up in jail, but otherwise wife spanking leads to lots of laughs and great sex.