Michelle Duggar on Managing Expectations

[alysee]

http://parentables.howstuffworks.com/fa ... tions.html

 

"But giving up expectations gives us a grateful spirit -- we're not discontent with where we are in life. And we're not always grumbling and complaining about the way things should be -- it really does create a spirit of gratefulness in our heart."

 

I hope Michelle is grateful for having 4 daughters who run her house because she couldn't, but it's doubtful.

[browngrl]

Oh please. Michelle is ALL about expectations. For example:

(1)She expects her daughters to wives and mothers and NO other profession

(2) She expects her daughters to wear skirts/dresses only

(3)She expects her daughters to go through courtship and never date and arrive on their marriage beds with hymen intact

(4) She expects all of her children to stick with the brand of christianity she has chosen

(5) She expects her daughters to do most of the child care

(6)She expects that none of her children will be gay

The list of her expectations goes on and on. I bet there would be hell to pay if she had to give up on any one of those expectations.

[Mountain Girl]

Oh, how much easier my life would be if I didn't expect my children to act like human beings or contribute as much to the world as they are capable of! If only I hadn't expected my significant other to be my equal and friend! Oh wait, that actually worked out pretty well.

Am I missing Michelle's point or is this just another "stay sweet and don't question your headship" thing?

[apple1]

http://parentables.howstuffworks.com/family-matters/michelle-duggar-no-expectations.html

"But giving up expectations gives us a grateful spirit -- we're not discontent with where we are in life. And we're not always grumbling and complaining about the way things should be -- it really does create a spirit of gratefulness in our heart."

That quote doesn't come from Michelle's (nonexistent) ability to think deeply. It is flat-out Gothard teaching from Gothard's list of character qualities- "Meekness vs. anger: Yielding yielding my personal rights and expectations"

[Mela99]

I wonder how many of her daughters would challenge the discontent part...

Also, what about Joy? Aren't they expecting her to stop being herself and conform to the rest of the family? Instead of being happy with her as an individual?

[mystweaver]

I tried giving up expectations ala my gothardesque upbringing. Result: Apathy, depression, and learned helplessness.

Adult move: learn that expectations are normal, disappointment is normal, and dealing with both of them is a mark of mental stability.

[Childless]

Give up expectations? Michelle may be on to something. I wonder if my boss would agree if I told him the great Michelle Duggar told me I didn't have to meet expectations at work. Somehow, I think not.

We're expected to do well in school. We're expected to do our jobs and do them well by our employer. We're expected to follow laws. We're expected to be productive members of society. We're expected to raise well-adjusted children should we choose to be parents. Life is full of expectations. Michelle needs to put on her big girl pants and grow up.

[OnceModestTwiceShy]

That circular talking thing she does is so grating. Is she trying to hypnotize us into agreeing with her? "This gives us a grateful spirit, because it creates a spirit of gratefuless, and so, we feel grateful, you know, in our spirits."

[Trynn]

Give up expectations? Michelle may be on to something. I wonder if my boss would agree if I told him the great Michelle Duggar told me I didn't have to meet expectations at work. Somehow, I think not.

We're expected to do well in school. We're expected to do our jobs and do them well by our employer. We're expected to follow laws. We're expected to be productive members of society. We're expected to raise well-adjusted children should we choose to be parents. Life is full of expectations. Michelle needs to put on her big girl pants and grow up.

Michelle? Put on pants?