Joy & Austin 34: Baby Three

[marmalade]

3 hours ago, Coconut Flan said:

      

Did she read her sisters' books?  She did recently visit Jinger.  Did she like what she saw and heard?  

I remember her saying she planned to read Jill's book. Maybe by now she has. She said she talks to Jinger the most out of all her siblings. 

[Kiki03910]

Maybe I'm wrong, but Joy has always seemed to quietly follow her own path. She's not rebellious by any means, but she seemed to manage to retain some of her tomboyishness in the face of the ridiculous Gothard standards. It'd be nice if she could follow her own path, such as it is.

[indianabones]

1 hour ago, Kiki03910 said:

Maybe I'm wrong, but Joy has always seemed to quietly follow her own path. She's not rebellious by any means, but she seemed to manage to retain some of her tomboyishness in the face of the ridiculous Gothard standards. It'd be nice if she could follow her own path, such as it is.

I remember feeling so sad for her when the Duggars announced her high school graduation and said that her post-schooling plans were learning how to be a future wife and homemaker.

[marmalade]

11 minutes ago, indianabones said:

I remember feeling so sad for her when the Duggars announced her high school graduation and said that her post-schooling plans were learning how to be a future wife and homemaker.

She was already seeing Austin then. They just kept it under wraps until she was 18.

[WatchingTheTireFireBurn]

I know people don't like Austin. But I think he does have a backbone that say Ben doesn't have. Austin has his own opinions and I think that was good for Joy. I also think that Joy benefitted from being sort of isolated from the older girls and playing with the boys so much when younger. She had to have some moments of why do I have to do X now as she grew up, but my brothers don't?

 

[marmalade]

She doesn't come off as a deep thinker. I think she went with the flow and accepted her fate without complaint.

[Kiki03910]

1 hour ago, marmalade said:

She doesn't come off as a deep thinker. I think she went with the flow and accepted her fate without complaint.

I agree with this. But I do think she kept a bit of her tomboyishness, and Austin seems to be fine with it. It's not much, but it's something.

[viii]

8 hours ago, marmalade said:

She doesn't come off as a deep thinker. I think she went with the flow and accepted her fate without complaint.

I don’t know. She thanked Joe for helping her while she was struggling to accept her parents faith as her own, so that certainly suggests she had a moment where she wasn’t going with the flow and was questioning things. 

[Cam]

I don’t see Joy as following her own path at all up to this point. She got the equivalent of an eighth grade education at the SOTDT like all her other siblings, no further education; got engaged at age 19, got kissed for the first time as well as a penis in her vagina on her wedding night and gave birth nine months later. She’s now 26 and has had four pregnancies, three resulting in live births. Like her other siblings, she had her courtship, wedding and at least one birth covered by a Duggar reality episode. And she was barking “Instantly obey!” to her younger sisters on one of those shows. 

Like some of her siblings, she now does YouTube vlogs for income, chronicling her life, filming her pregnancy news and gender reveals, and hawking things like diet stuff and vitamins. Oh, and getting hair cuts. For awhile, she seemed to embrace being one of the “Medicorp Wives” and they loved posting photos of their get-togethers all dolled up for some girls’ night on the town or a swim party baby shower. None of this has veered off the already beaten path her older sisters made before for her. Imo, I don’t consider wearing a ball cap and cutting her hair a few inches much of a break-away from the cult like behavior that was modeled to her growing up. I mean, her other sisters wear ball caps sometimes, too. 

At one point, Joy supposedly went on an annual hunting trip with her hubs and brothers, but there’s been no reporting of that for several years. Does Joy still go but not mention it due to some people being turned off by it which might affect her social media following and sponsorships? Or is Joy too busy these days being a stay at home mom and had to give it up? Did she/does she consider hunting a hobby of hers? Maybe she’s lost interest and wants to do something new?

Edited January 31 by Cam

[Mama Mia]

7 hours ago, Cam said:

 

At one point, Joy supposedly went on an annual hunting trip with her hubs and brothers, but there’s been no reporting of that for several years. Does Joy still go but not mention it due to some people being turned off by it which might affect her social media following and sponsorships? Or is Joy too busy these days being a stay at home mom and had to give it up? Did she/does she consider hunting a hobby of hers? Maybe she’s lost interest and wants to do something new?

She and her husband went on a hunting and fishing trip to Alaska towards the end of ‘22. IIRC it’s where she discovered she was pregnant with her youngest.  A quick Google shows that she’s gotten a lot of push back  and on-line hate anytime she posts about hunting trips, so that may be why she doesn’t feature it.  What surprised me back when 19 kids and Counting was on, is that Jinger was the daughter who went hunting with her dad and brothers. I think Joy was too young to tag along at the time. But big city loving, artsy, quiet, Jinger presents as the least likely of all the older girls, to me, to want to hunt. Jill seems like she might like the trying new things aspect, Jessa I could see pragmatically shooting and butchering and counting out meals. Jana would be fashioning tables from the antlers.but Jinger was a surprise 

[Cam]

8 hours ago, Mama Mia said:

She and her husband went on a hunting and fishing trip to Alaska towards the end of ‘22. IIRC it’s where she discovered she was pregnant with her youngest.  A quick Google shows that she’s gotten a lot of push back  and on-line hate anytime she posts about hunting trips, so that may be why she doesn’t feature it.  What surprised me back when 19 kids and Counting was on, is that Jinger was the daughter who went hunting with her dad and brothers. I think Joy was too young to tag along at the time. But big city loving, artsy, quiet, Jinger presents as the least likely of all the older girls, to me, to want to hunt. Jill seems like she might like the trying new things aspect, Jessa I could see pragmatically shooting and butchering and counting out meals. Jana would be fashioning tables from the antlers.but Jinger was a surprise 

So if Joy going hunting is a reason she’s being called a tomboy, then what about Jinger? Jinger’s broken away from the pack more than Joy, yet people like to claim it’s Joy who goes about doing her own thing. To me, it doesn’t look that way. She still looks like a follower. And as mentioned, are the trappings of now being the mother of three reducing Joy’s hunting time, or is there a conflict between her hobby and her social media influencing? 

[justmy2cents]

9 hours ago, Mama Mia said:

What surprised me back when 19 kids and Counting was on, is that Jinger was the daughter who went hunting with her dad and brothers. I think Joy was too young to tag along at the time. But big city loving, artsy, quiet, Jinger presents as the least likely of all the older girls, to me, to want to hunt. Jill seems like she might like the trying new things aspect, Jessa I could see pragmatically shooting and butchering and counting out meals. Jana would be fashioning tables from the antlers.but Jinger was a surprise 

Not to mention the episode where Jinger went to a car auction with her brothers, which was presented as something she was interested in pursuing. Complete bs. 

[Mama Mia]

2 hours ago, Cam said:

So if Joy going hunting is a reason she’s being called a tomboy, then what about Jinger? Jinger’s broken away from the pack more than Joy, yet people like to claim it’s Joy who goes about doing her own thing. To me, it doesn’t look that way. She still looks like a follower. And as mentioned, are the trappings of now being the mother of three reducing Joy’s hunting time, or is there a conflict between her hobby and her social media influencing? 

I don’t think it was just hunting specifically that made her a tomboy. She does a lot of outdoorsy stuff. ATV’s and camping and working construction with her husband. I think she comes across a little less trad wife than is the current fashion. But if you were to go by social media, none of them really hit that mark.  They all -to me- look like they are living lives pretty similar to other women in their age group who have small children and the option to work from home. Different hobbies / interests/ personalities - presumably partly due to their husbands interests and personalities.  I have no idea if she hunts less or just doesn’t post about it. Probably a combo. If my job was getting positive engagement and I had people screaming at me every time I posted about a particular activity, I probably wouldn’t post about it. I also  wouldn’t have as much time for outside stuff when I had a bunch of little kids as I did before kids. 
TLDR - She’s outdoorsy and a mom who makes some $$ from social media, she’s going to pick and choose what to highlight about her life. I think she gets positive feedback for it because as a teen her family very blatantly tried to push her into being very “girly”. 

[Cam]

On 1/30/2024 at 10:58 PM, indianabones said:

I remember feeling so sad for her when the Duggars announced her high school graduation and said that her post-schooling plans were learning how to be a future wife and homemaker.

Eegads! It’s like it was written for a female high school graduate in the 1950’s! Interesting they left out what they consider the apex of the only true feminine worth: learning to be a mother. I guess they figure that only starts after you get pregnant? Does anyone else think it can been seen as sadistic to severely limit physical touch between a courtshipped couple until marriage but then the expectation is full on intercourse the day they wed? Or is all the discomfort, awkwardness, embarrassment, ineptitude and whatever else that may come from that kind of scenario just a big joke to the patriarchs? 

Edited February 1 by Cam

[Meggo]

4 hours ago, Cam said:

Does anyone else think it can been seen as sadistic to severely limit physical touch between a courtshipped couple until marriage but then the expectation is full on intercourse the day they wed? Or is all the discomfort, awkwardness, embarrassment, ineptitude and whatever else that may come from that kind of scenario just a big joke to the patriarchs? 

YES - this! And it's not even "okay - you're married - touch if you will" but it's "you're married - time to start popping out babies." 
But you've never been alone with this guy (or any guy). You've never touched him beyond whatever hand holding Josh & Anna did (ugh). You've never kissed anyone until that time in a HUGE group of people and there ya go - good luck. Chuckle chuckle. Like -COME ON. 
If you want to save yourself for marriage - go for it. But most people who do that these days at least KNOW what's going to happen, have probably talked about it (and not with their parents ever present) and have probably at least kissed the guy before they're married. It just seems like such a ridiculously unhealthy obsession with virginity. 

[BullyJBG]

Gasp! They're dancing! Yes they are! And it's on YouTube for everyone to see! 

[dawn9476]

They have been seen dancing before. I want to say they were slow dancing with a lot of other couples at a wedding. I want to say it was Nathan and Esther Bates.  And I guess these lessons came about because Austin got Joy a couple of lessons for Joy's birthday. I guess they liked it because it seems them signed up for more.

[JermajestyDuggar]

I say good. More Gothard fundies need to break this rule. It was one of the stupidest rules Gothard had. And he had a lot of stupid rules. 

[xenobia]

And we also have John&Abbie in the video. Good for them. 

[Father Son Holy Goat]

I think Joy is forging her own path on the little things. And that’s okay, because as we’ve seen with Jill the little things can eventually become the big things. 

[SassyPants]

I think some of the adult, married couples have reflected on how JB responded to Josh abusing his sisters and other(s) and how he reacted to Jill and Dereck standing up to him. The history of JB’s behaviors when compared to his words (transfer of authority, leave and cleave) likely have lead to some of these couples questioning JB’s beliefs and motives, and making different decisions for their own families.

[GuineaPigCourtship]

At this point where a lot of the "small stuff" like wearing pants and cutting hair have been done by several others first, they're no big deal.  Joy can probably adjust a lot of small things in her life to her liking without making it into a confrontation with JB.  No need to even tell him about a lot of it..  Who cares if she helps Austin at his work site?  Austin is her headship.  And if they decide to use birth control of some sort, they can avoid any drama by just not bringing it up.  So she may be doing her own thing on a small scale, or not.

[fluffernutter]

Joy posted a pic of her and Austin lying down on a bed or sofa kissing for Valentine's Day. There's a kid's head in the pic too, but seriously. I would never in a million years post a pic of me and Mr. Fluff horizontal. It's so weird how.... overt? public? fundies are with their affection.  Reminds me of Carlin sitting on the counter wrapped around her guy a few months back. 🤢

[JDuggs]

Joy mentioned in her IG stories that she’s going to her sister’s tonight and one of her brothers will be there. The nosy me wants to know what sister and what brother. I still don’t think the Forsyths and the Dillards “get along,” so my guesses are Jessa and Josiah (if we ever find out). I would actually like to be proven wrong and see that Jill and Joy have more of a relationship than they’ve shown.

[indianabones]

On 2/16/2024 at 2:54 PM, JDuggs said:

I would actually like to be proven wrong and see that Jill and Joy have more of a relationship than they’ve shown.

I bet Jill thinks that Joy will be filming everything if they hang out for her family vlog. Including Jill's kids.