Harry & Meghan 8: Time's Most Insufferable

[EmCatlyn]

42 minutes ago, SoSoNosy said:

I never saw anything positive about her; to me, her body language in their engagement pictures was "look at me! I am going to be the biggest celebrity in the UK!!"  She pushed herself forward, and was very obviously not happy when she wasn't carefully placed at the front of every gathering (i e balcony gathering),  And the story bout QE sending Archie a waffle iron for Christmas, the electrical connections aren't the same, so that couldn't be the literal truth.  She has fed Harry all this nonsense about how mistreated he is, and how he (they) should have far more support from the family until he fully believes it; it probably didn't take much.  When my mother died, my sister-in-law demanded a copy of the will because 'there should have been A LOT more money!!  Money wasn't even mentioned in that will but my brother had led her to believe otherwise, then he developed Alzheimer's and left everything up to her imagination.  People who are looking for money/support can be oh so upset when it isn't there.

 

About the waffle iron — I don’t know if the Queen did or didn’t send one, but I don’t think it is impossible that she had a secretary figure out how to order one from an American shop so that the wiring wouldn’t have been a problem—unless a waffle iron that could only be used in the UK was sent as either a joke (the Windsors exchange joke gifts) or a hint that she expected the Sussexes back.  In other words, this is hardly the most unbelievable story from Meghan.

We do not know that it has been Meghan who has been telling Harry that his family has not treated them well.  I think it could very well be Harry’s own paranoia.  Remember that Diana was not the most stable person herself, and even if paranoia is no hereditary (who knows if it is), it can be “taught.”  When you grow up around someone who is paranoid, you may come to see the world from a paranoid perspective.

So, a lot of the, “we were not well-treated” stuff may come from Harry, who (like many younger siblings) always had some jealousy toward the older brother he probably also adored.  Meghan may have built up on it.   She certainly seems to have played on his fear of losing her again.  I just don’t see her as much worse than he is —except that she seems to have more of an agenda.

 

 

[SoSoNosy]

I didn't mean to imply that I thought the waffle iron was the most unbelievable story, or even among the top 25; it was just something that I remembered while I was typing.  I'm not sure I believe much of anything they say.

[just_ordinary]

Oh Harry……. Why can’t you just STFU? I mean sure having 45‘ a day for a recreational activity most definitely helps your mental health. But I have yet to hear, from a believable source, it’s the solution for burn out….. the problematic structures and patterns are not changed by that. Also, how many people with two young children manage to create such a daily slot consistently? Maybe the ones that can afford an expensive mental health coach? I really wonder how he thinks 95% of people live. You could argue though, that his message is for the other 5%. That’s just not really fitting into his charitable, saving the world image they try to sell.

I am also sure they give their stuff time to “focus on themselves”- but my bet it that’s not happening on their pay role. They probably just get paid less for less working hours. There great companies out there that do a lot for the mental & physical health of their employees. Stuff they invest money in (yoga and meditation courses at lunch break, extra days off, having a great policy around sick days, schemes like “education holiday” =extra up to two weeks off (not reflected in your salary) if you book a course that qualifies in that time (becoming a yoga instructor, language course, healthy cooking courses, hiking holiday, time management courses….). But not every company can do that. And many jobs are not the 7-5 corporate office type. And in the end they are not responsible for your mental health, as long as they are not part of the problem to begin with. Again time to focus on yourself is not changing the problems at work. It’s a good start, but not the solution- if you have a real work related burn out.
It seems he just strings things together that in general are good advice but waffles on till it’s painfully obvious he just spouts back stuff. It was just a promotional video that he gets paid for as CIO. It also doesn’t look like it’s his reality anyway. So if I had such problems H is definitely not the example that I would get inspired by. Because he looks unhappy and acts unstable more than anything else.

[MamaJunebug]

Ah ha ha, I just had a thought. 
 

Jill & David are determined to teach their kids to be good losers  — and the kids are learning what losers their parents are!!! 

[just_ordinary]

I will just leave this comment that someone else made regarding his newest public appearance (of course bringing out the „I am my mother’s son“ angle).

'The problem being, Diana was a tireless worker and campaigner. Harry is no worker and is a tireless complainer.'

[viii]

Tireless complainer is right. 

[EmCatlyn]

Harry and Meghan’s failure to congratulate the Queen on having reigned for 70 years has been noted by most people who watch the Royal Family.  Here is one interpretation.
 

Quote

 

In a video on his YouTube channel The Body Language Guy, expert Jesús Enrique Rosas shared some thoughts on why Harry and Meghan didn’t release a statement. 

“Harry and Meghan have been unusually quiet,” he explained. “Some silences just scream out loud, like not sending any public message to Her Majesty the Queen in her Platinum Jubilee.”

….

He wondered if the queen’s statement about Camilla upset Harry. “Just the fact that they decided to issue no congratulations at all, it’s a good signal that maybe they are not coming for the Jubilee celebrations,” Rosas shared.

He added, “Not sending a public message on her majesty’s Jubilee is literally a declaration of war.”

Showbiz Cheatsheet - Feb. 9, 2022   (Bolding, mine)

Personally, I think “declaration of war,” is too strong, but it is definitely a message that they are not happy.  My guess is that this has to do with the Queen not waving her magic wand so they can have royal protection.  The Camilla thing may have contributed, but I definitely think Harry is feeling let down by Granny and his silence is a form of sulk.

[just_ordinary]

It’s complicated. Her jubilee is a professional anniversary so to say. The RF has made a point in not mentioning anything about H&M professional antics -partly because their accounts are mostly professional and it’s obvious there is a wish to keep a clear line between the professional part, where H&M have no place anymore and the private relationship. It was extremely obvious when HMTQ talked about PC and PW achievements. H&M also don’t have any SM accounts of their own (that we know of) and the usage of Archwell just doesn’t make sense (as it didn’t when PP died. It was just a weird post). So I would like to think they have congratulated in private somehow. 
Her other grandchildren with accounts haven’t done anything as well. I think the Cambridges reposted something in their story. But as of now, no big heartfelt personal congrats on that front.
On the other hand, we have always heard very publicly whenever they did something privately, so it’s easy to assume they really are not talking to them/her and have chosen to ignore this milestone. 
It would be lovely if they finally start not giving a s**t what the tabloids say and just get on with it. Who cares if they say you didn’t congratulate. Ignore it. Because the people that really have to know do know. It’s not as if they will actually loose their job or friends over it.

My guess- the professional relationship is as dead as it can be. No way back into the fold. Especially with the talk of transforming into a smaller operation (meaning less working royals, like 4-7 max.).

The private one seems highly strained, but can hopefully be rekindled in the future. I just hope they can do this with HMTQ as soon as possible. And I am not talking about sending cards and maybe talking on FaceTime once a month. But as of now, I don’t see them coming to the UK. Not for the jubilee or anytime this year. Harry might (extremely questionable in my opinion), but neither Meghan or the kids. It’s sad, but apart from the Queen, it is reasonable to expect a few more years time before it gets such a pressing matter. I am sure in 10 years we will see a soppy PC, sons and grandchildren pic.

Edited February 12, 2022 by just_ordinary

[WiseGirl]

5 hours ago, EmCatlyn said:

his silence is a form of sulk.

Harry sulk? Never! /s

[rosamundi]

1 hour ago, just_ordinary said:

Her jubilee is a professional anniversary so to say.

The jubilee is, officially, in June. The commemorative stuff has been launched, but the big celebration is, as with her other regnal commemorations, in June, which is the date of her coronation.

She's always said that the February anniversary of her accession to the throne is tinged with sadness because it's also the anniversary of her father's death, and she's always marked it quietly.

[viii]

This is stupid. Nobody said anything besides Charles. The congratulations will come in June for her coronation anniversary. The queen doesn’t view her accession day as celebratory but rather mourning her dad. 

[HerNameIsBuffy]

10 hours ago, EmCatlyn said:

Harry and Meghan’s failure to congratulate the Queen on having reigned for 70 years has been noted by most people who watch the Royal Family.  Here is one interpretation.
 

Personally, I think “declaration of war,” is too strong, but it is definitely a message that they are not happy.  My guess is that this has to do with the Queen not waving her magic wand so they can have royal protection.  The Camilla thing may have contributed, but I definitely think Harry is feeling let down by Granny and his silence is a form of sulk.

I love body language vids but I won't watch that guy.  His vitriol for H & M is so extreme he makes River look unbiased.

[EmCatlyn]

31 minutes ago, HerNameIsBuffy said:

I love body language vids but I won't watch that guy.  His vitriol for H & M is so extreme he makes River look unbiased.

I thought it was funny that he is “analyzing” something that isn’t body language at all.

3 hours ago, viii said:

This is stupid. Nobody said anything besides Charles. The congratulations will come in June for her coronation anniversary. The queen doesn’t view her accession day as celebratory but rather mourning her dad. 

I believe William reposted (or linked) the official announcement.  The issue is less “celebrating” than acknowledging.  The whole thing seems over the top to me, but it does seem to have stirred up discussion in the public.

(It was amusing, by the way, that Thomas Markle sent his congratulations.🙄)

[just_ordinary]

16 hours ago, rosamundi said:

The jubilee is, officially, in June. The commemorative stuff has been launched, but the big celebration is, as with her other regnal commemorations, in June, which is the date of her coronation.

She's always said that the February anniversary of her accession to the throne is tinged with sadness because it's also the anniversary of her father's death, and she's always marked it quietly.

Sure the official celebration is mostly planned for June, but the jubilee happened 6th Feb. 6th Feb 1952 - 6th Feb 2022 is the 70 year span that gets celebrated. Very much like her birthday there is a difference between the moment actually happening and when it gets officially celebrated. I would argue that her family does acknowledge her actual birthday, so I am pretty sure they acknowledge her actual jubilee. Probably quiet and private regarding the sad background. 
So I agree that there is no need to criticise H&M for the exact same behaviour the rest of the family has shown for decades and this year. 
I just pointed out that I am sure they did contact her for the occasion - or at least I hope they did. I also pointed out that, whenever they got such criticism they were very quick to let everyone and their cat know they indeed had privately contacted the RF. Even when it was completely unnecessary because the whole story was bs anyway. 
So either they have maybe grown a thicker skin and don’t feel the need to „set every stupid story straight“ anymore or they like the public gossiping about it and what it might mean.

[louisa05]

On 2/12/2022 at 1:58 AM, EmCatlyn said:

Harry and Meghan’s failure to congratulate the Queen on having reigned for 70 years has been noted by most people who watch the Royal Family.  Here is one interpretation.
 

Personally, I think “declaration of war,” is too strong, but it is definitely a message that they are not happy.  My guess is that this has to do with the Queen not waving her magic wand so they can have royal protection.  The Camilla thing may have contributed, but I definitely think Harry is feeling let down by Granny and his silence is a form of sulk.

Even the American press knows that the Queen has no control over who gets government funded security. If he’s blaming her, he’s just showing his willful ignorance yet again. 

[MamaJunebug]

10 hours ago, just_ordinary said:

So either they have maybe grown a thicker skin and don’t feel the need to „set every stupid story straight“ anymore or they like the public gossiping about it and what it might mean.

Both seem unlikely. Acknowledge that there IS such a thing as “bad publicity?” Naah. 
 

(attempt at humor follows) I miss the Diana days. St least when there was a micro scandal then, it came with a new outfit or hairstyle on Diana. And seriously, for whatever emotional troubles she had behind the scenes, Diana came across as a truly caring individual.  She tried in several ways to make life better for the least of these. And her backstory was pretty regrettable. 
 

Meg’s & H’s, not as much.  Yes, he lost his momma suddenly and young. Yes, her folks split. Not the same degree as being pushed into an arranged marriage, at least IMO.

Anyhoo…I snark but I’m optimistic by nature. Maybe H&M are getting a clue. It’s no fun to be estranged from family. 

[HerNameIsBuffy]

2 minutes ago, MamaJunebug said:

Anyhoo…I snark but I’m optimistic by nature. Maybe H&M are getting a clue. It’s no fun to be estranged from family. 

Same.  I hope they can eventually work things out in a way that's beneficial for everyone involved.  

Beneficial doesn't mean perfect and annoyance free, but non-toxic levels where the positives of maintaining family ties out weigh the annoyance of dealing with relatives who can be pains in the ass at times.

[nokidsmom]

1 hour ago, HerNameIsBuffy said:

Same.  I hope they can eventually work things out in a way that's beneficial for everyone involved.  

Beneficial doesn't mean perfect and annoyance free, but non-toxic levels where the positives of maintaining family ties out weigh the annoyance of dealing with relatives who can be pains in the ass at times.

Can speak to this as someone who is trying to work out maintaining ties with a difficult and toxic family member after a period of estrangement.   Getting the "beneficial" part while minimizing the difficult and toxic parts can be a challenge but it is possible.   It also means learning new ways for yourself in how you interact.  Hopefully H&M can learn to do this.  

Up to now it seems they just want to carry on as they were, the RF is supposed to just cave in and it's not working out.   If better family ties are desired it's going to require some give/adjustments on their part.

[viii]

6 hours ago, MamaJunebug said:

Meg’s & H’s, not as much.  Yes, he lost his momma suddenly and young. Yes, her folks split. Not the same degree as being pushed into an arranged marriage, at least IMO. 

Yeah…. I’d say losing your mother in a traumatic accident at a young age is worse than being pushed into an arranged marriage. 

[EmCatlyn]

9 hours ago, louisa05 said:

Even the American press knows that the Queen has no control over who gets government funded security. If he’s blaming her, he’s just showing his willful ignorance yet again. 

The Queen has no “control” but she is presumed to have “influence.”  Harry may feel that she is not using her influence.  A big problem in that family is that Elizabeth seems to alternate between “Monarch” and “Grandparent” (or sister, or mother) in ways that her family cannot always predict. Who knows if Harry hoped that this was one case where she would be “grandmother” and make a special request for security for Harry and his family during the Jubilee celebrations? 

However, it is equally possible that Harry and Meghan communicated privately with the Queen about the Jubilee.  And all this talk about why they didn’t congratulate her publicly is just the media wanting “a story.”

I just don’t think Harry’s main issue is that Camilla is going to be Queen.  He may resent Camilla, but he also knows that she has made his father happy.  And he probably understands that “Queen Consort” is the default and “Princess Consort” would mean creating a new title and all that.  I doubt if Harry is angry (which we don’t know that he is) the main reason is Camilla.

[just_ordinary]

@EmCatlyn the thing is, they would most definitely get quite tight police protection around the jubilee. Just like H did for the funeral and as other members will have around official events, that normally don’t have protection. His issue is that he doesn’t get it outside the official royal sphere. So maybe even not around their whole stay if they did go to the jubilee. I really think it’s in bad taste he wants to go head to head with government about this. As if the UK hasn’t much more important matters, nationally and internationally, to focus on. The security issues of a millionaire that “cannot” visit his family otherwise is really really low on the list. And quite honestly, PC and PW could just as well go and visit them. If they can fly to Jordan for a family holiday, they can fly to the US as well. I might not agree with how H&M have gone about things but there are always two to tango. To rekindle they all need to find new ways of communication and spending time together. For HMTQ it’s sad. Most grandparents and great grandparents are just delighted to spend time with the next generation, even if it’s only on rare occasions. And Archie is at an age when they could actually interact and might form some memories (speaking as a mother of a three year old, and lucky enough to have both of the great grandmothers around and well. To see them playing with their great grandchild is really special and they as well as my child really really enjoy it.). But then, who knows. She is very probably not as involved with her children etc. as they want us to believe. HMTQ has never acted as if she really is into motherhoods or extremely warm families relationships. On the other hand she was also reluctant to make cold cuts and stay firm on the business side with them. It must be a minefield to manoeuvre through and quite frankly a nightmare from time to time. But I don’t have idea if she is just more of a closed up and distant character or felt she needed to do this and that or felt trapped and rather didn’t move at all or if she is actually quite warm and involved nowadays (not to underestimate that being a grandparent opens a completely new relationship level than being a parent to someone).

The tabloids also use every opportunity to make up any kind of dramatic story. I mean how many headlines around miscarriage/illness/accident/divorce are there, and only when you read the article you realise it’s actually the neighbour or close friend and not the celebrity they used front and centre. So my guess is 75% is mostly made up and 20% is exaggerated and slightly out of context. 

@viii I don’t think those situations are comparable at all. Both can be their very own special kind of hell. But you can get over the early death of a parent (or so they say- and in the end it really doesn’t matter why they died) and you can find a good relationship and sometimes even love in an arranged marriage. But you can also never really get over the loss of said parent or end up in a horrible marriage. It depends very much on the situation and your personal disposition.

[WiseGirl]

Didn't see this one coming. He gets along with one family member.

https://people.com/royals/prince-harry-first-super-bowl-cousin-princess-eugenie/

[just_ordinary]

It’s nice to see that he got some family visit after all. Eugenie has been his closest family member for a while now. Maybe he will have s look at how she and her sister manage and take some notes.

[viii]

4 hours ago, just_ordinary said:

@viii I don’t think those situations are comparable at all. Both can be their very own special kind of hell. But you can get over the early death of a parent (or so they say- and in the end it really doesn’t matter why they died) and you can find a good relationship and sometimes even love in an arranged marriage. But you can also never really get over the loss of said parent or end up in a horrible marriage. It depends very much on the situation and your personal disposition.

I’m not the user that originally compared the two. 

[tabitha2]

Beatrice and Eugenie were the closest in age to the brothers  with somewhat similar parental situations besides being very chill and good natured and Now they all have young families.Stands to reason If Harry was going to keep stay close to his family it would be them. I always had the feeling  back in the day Harry or William  might have been like the sons Andrew never had and Andrew was the cool dashing military pilot They would admire.