Dillards 87: Experts on Everything!

[AussieKrissy]

Omg this whole cameo thing is hella awkward and second hand embarrassing for me. I just could not imagine asking anyone to (personally) pay to speak to me. I would not know what to say to some fucking random creeper that wanted to talk to me. Let alone be “obligated” too because they have paid too. For me shout outs are more for celebs to do for good reasons. Sick kids, charity work etc where they don’t get paid. Oddly I don’t disagree for them to get paid an appearance fee if they were doing an appearance or a book signing etc because I see that more as kind of work. Cameo just seems like cashing in on people’s desperation..

and Alyssa rating them is stupid, anyone who knows them would have to know that’s bullshit because why the hell would “friends” pay to speak to each other.

[allthegoodnamesrgone]

2 hours ago, AussieKrissy said:

Omg this whole cameo thing is hella awkward and second hand embarrassing for me. I just could not imagine asking anyone to (personally) pay to speak to me. I would not know what to say to some fucking random creeper that wanted to talk to me. Let alone be “obligated” too because they have paid too. For me shout outs are more for celebs to do for good reasons. Sick kids, charity work etc where they don’t get paid. Oddly I don’t disagree for them to get paid an appearance fee if they were doing an appearance or a book signing etc because I see that more as kind of work. Cameo just seems like cashing in on people’s desperation..

and Alyssa rating them is stupid, anyone who knows them would have to know that’s bullshit because why the hell would “friends” pay to speak to each other.

Exactly, the most recent celeb thing I can think of is Robert Pattinson who sent a note and gift to an Autistic Batman fan after an online campaign to get his attention.  That whole Cameo thing is just a way for D list "celebs" and has beens to bank on their 15 minutes of fame. 

[Vivi_music]

I truly have no idea how Cameo works. I understand what it is, but never tried it.

Is the price of the call decided by the website (and algorithms I suppose) or the person creating her/his account?

[Grace]

On 11/7/2020 at 6:50 AM, allthegoodnamesrgone said:

Exactly, the most recent celeb thing I can think of is Robert Pattinson who sent a note and gift to an Autistic Batman fan after an online campaign to get his attention.  That whole Cameo thing is just a way for D list "celebs" and has beens to bank on their 15 minutes of fame. 

I think some have used it for fundraisers. I feel like I saw Rosie O'donnell do one for a Democratic candidate. But hers were like $250 a message ?

[Iamtheway]

On 11/3/2020 at 1:23 AM, QuiverFullofBooks said:

You’re kidding about the Mosquito Control Commissioners, right?

On 11/3/2020 at 9:20 AM, jakesykora said:

I have a feeling it was serious based on all these results!
https://www.google.com/search?client=firefox-b-1-d&q=Mosquito+Control+Commissioners

On 11/3/2020 at 2:08 PM, OHFL2009 said:

100% serious. I guess it's kind of an important post when you essentially live in a swamp? We even have competing yard signs in our neighborhood.

  Hide contents

  Hide contents

(Not my photo, but we have the same thing in my neighborhood)

 

 

I always learn something here. Today about mosquitos. ? ??‍♀️ 
Who did you chose and why?

In Sweden voting is super easy and in the last election almost 90% voted. You get your voting card in the mail without having to do anything yourself. You bring that and an id in when you vote. There are plenty of locations to go vote before election day and you can mail it as well but I have always gone on electionday to my appointed location. Last time I stood in line for maybe ten minutes before it was my turn. You usually vote for three things; national goverment, regional goverment and your local county. 
You vote for one party in each of the three elections by choosing a preprinted piece of paper for your party and putting it in an envelope that you give to the person ticking you of the list. No names anywhere on envelopes so no one can know what you voted for. If there’s no preprinted paper for the party you want to vote for there are blank ones where you can write your choice down. 
Each party has a list of names and if you do nothing your vote counts as a vote for the top name on the list. If you want to you can circle a person further down on the list (or write the name if they are not on the list) and vote especially for them and a lot of personal votes means they can pass people on the list. I’ve only done this once when someone I know was on the list for the local county. 

[OHFL2009]

15 hours ago, Iamtheway said:

I always learn something here. Today about mosquitos. ? ??‍♀️ 
Who did you chose and why?

I voted for the challenger, because he has worked in pest control for many years, while the incumbent owns a plumbing business, which as far as I know has very little to do with mosquitos. But apparently people are happy with the incumbent because he won pretty easily. 

[kmachete14]

A good friend of mine was organizing a combined bachelor / bachelorette party during COVID. He paid for a Cameo from Chris Harrison (of the Bachelor franchise) to make a funny quip/joke and congratulate the couple. The couple was so surprised and loved it. 

The thing I think is odd is that there would be such die-hard fans of these fundies that they would actually pay for this!! 

[HideousGreenShirt]

Has this book that Jill posted about been discussed?

It's a weird thing for her to be posting about and no surprise according to a review it paints all nudity in negative light (copied and pasted this review under spoiler). 

It is interesting that it encourages "Turn, Tell, Run" when Jill was punished for being a tattler by her own parents. 

Spoiler

"The idea of this book is good but the execution is highly questionable. According to the book:

 

- All images or drawings of nude bodies are pornography that are "poison for your brain" - this explanation is incorrect & psychologically extremely unhealthy representation of nudity & human body. This has been proven to result in children developing shame around their bodies & about being naturally curious about human body (which is absolutely normal for young children). What about art? What about anatomical representations of human body they will encounter in a biology class? What about the fact that each kid at some point in their life saw at least one parent as least partially naked & that their parents saw them naked many times? Well, according to the book in all these situations, children need to immediately cover their eyes & run away, to prevent poisoning their bran?! This is also a very problematic way of teaching kids how to cope with unpleasant or bad situations in life in general.

 

- Term pornography is discussed in book written for 3-6 year olds. Introducing this word & concept & with it, all follow up questions a child will have, is not appropriate for this age group. Children 3-6 years old are not developmentally ready to receive & comprehend explanation on what pornography really is (and no, it's not just any nude image of human body).

 

- Book also teaches children to whisper to their trusted adult about bad images they saw. Whisper? Why? Why not just have a normal, healthy, open conversation with your parent, out loud? Again, the book suggests that children should be ashamed of their "secret" of seeing a bad picture & should be secretive about it. Just plain wrong & damaging for child's development.

 

Such a missed opportunity with this book to help parents properly tackle such an important topic."

 

[Perrierwithlemon]

I've never even seen the book, but I agree with absolutely everything the review under the spoiler said. 

[fundiefan]

I was squigged out when I first saw this on a gossip site. 

Admittedly, I don't know anything about the book or the author. 

But, given Jill's history, I don't necessarily think it's a bad thing she's approaching the subject with her young children. She didn't get a chance to learn what was bad as her parents just sheltered her from all things life. She didn't get to stand up for herself as she had to forgive and watch her brother get on with his life as though nothing happened. 

She may be approaching in "wrong" - but she IS approaching it. She is teaching her children about things she had to learn about the hard way. 

I still think her husband is scraping the bottom of the cesspool and an ass and all that. But Jill is cracking the shell that kept her locked up tight & trying to give her own kids better. 

Anna Maxwell, the ofChristopher one, tells her young children about abortion & says women "kill babies". I think fundies have moveable boundary lines that suit them. In Jill's case though I don't know if there ever were boundaries for HER; she had to take what she was given. This is her boundary. 

[livinginthelight]

I give props to Jill for trying but the book sounds off. The subtitle: "Teaching your kids to internalize 'Nike!'"

[Giraffe]

23 minutes ago, livinginthelight said:

I give props to Jill for trying but the book sounds off. The subtitle: "Teaching your kids to internalize 'Nike!'"

This. It really sounds like it’s just purity culture reimagined repackaged. Still unhealthy and damaging. 

Edited November 13, 2020 by Giraffe

[Grace]

This is totally out there but now I'm thinking that the Duggar kids probably never got to flip thru the JC Penney Christmas catalog because of the underwear section and now I feel sorry for their Wishbook-deprived childhoods.

[Glasgowghirl]

I am also a bit torn by this book, I do think it is great Jill is discussing what is abuse and what isn't with her children, especially given what happened but other aspects of the book concern me but the fact Jill felt comfortable posting about discussing this with her children is good.

[baldricks_turnip]

1 hour ago, Glasgowghirl said:

I am also a bit torn by this book, I do think it is great Jill is discussing what is abuse and what isn't with her children, especially given what happened but other aspects of the book concern me but the fact Jill felt comfortable posting about discussing this with her children is good.

This is where I'm at too. If there's a spectrum from 'don't you even acknowledge genitals exist!' to healthy, age-appropriate, non-shaming discussion of healthy and unhealthy aspects of human sexuality, I'm glad Jill has at least come this far.
I'm an Australian teacher and in recent years we had a royal commission into institutional sexual abuse which lead to all school students (4+) being taught about personal safety, body autonomy, etc. One of the first very lessons we teach is about naming all the body parts because its very hard for students to disclose abuse if they don't have it in their vocabulary. Even if there is a very 'Nike!' spin on this book, I still think that's more healthy for her boys than nothing at all.

Edited November 14, 2020 by baldricks_turnip
+ a word

[Bad Wolf]

Didn't the Duggars little ones describe their genitals as a pee pee hole?

[Expectopatronus]

On 11/13/2020 at 9:02 PM, baldricks_turnip said:

This is where I'm at too. If there's a spectrum from 'don't you even acknowledge genitals exist!' to healthy, age-appropriate, non-shaming discussion of healthy and unhealthy aspects of human sexuality, I'm glad Jill has at least come this far.
I'm an Australian teacher and in recent years we had a royal commission into institutional sexual abuse which lead to all school students (4+) being taught about personal safety, body autonomy, etc. One of the first very lessons we teach is about naming all the body parts because its very hard for students to disclose abuse if they don't have it in their vocabulary. Even if there is a very 'Nike!' spin on this book, I still think that's more healthy for her boys than nothing at all.

I agree. We begin teaching the program Kids in the Know starting in kindergarten which starts by teaching names of body parts and the fact that no one can look at or touch another person’s private parts without their consent, their parents’ consent AND a good reason. A bit oversimplified sure but kids get it and can correctly answer that if they have an infection, it’s okay for the doctor (with their parents in the room) to examine their genitalia but that a babysitter, member of clergy, teacher, coach or another kid never has a good reason to see/touch these parts. 
Consent in romantic relationships isn’t relevant at five or six. These conversations begin in grade six (11 years). 

[Bad Wolf]

19 hours ago, Bad Wolf said:

Didn't the Duggars little ones describe their genitals as a pee pee hole?

Sorry to quote myself, they referred to their genitals as a pee pee holder, not hole.

[Bobology]

21 hours ago, Bad Wolf said:

Sorry to quote myself, they referred to their genitals as a pee pee holder, not hole.

Just so sick that they aren't taught and can't use actual names for genitals/organs. "This is my arm bender" for elbow makes more sense than "pee pee holder." Sheesh

[fluffernutter]

36 minutes ago, Bobology said:

Just so sick that they aren't taught and can't use actual names for genitals/organs. "This is my arm bender" for elbow makes more sense than "pee pee holder." Sheesh

Ugh yes. My mom only called anything between your stomach and your thighs "down there." 

[allthegoodnamesrgone]

It is all well and good teaching your children proper terms for your parts until they start screaming, You're a PENIS, you're a  VAGINA, at each other in the middle of the grocery store when they are 2 & 4. ?    It's pretty damn funny now, but I'm pretty sure they caused at least 1 old lady to   

Edited November 16, 2020 by allthegoodnamesrgone
your/you're I do know the different.

[baldricks_turnip]

3 hours ago, allthegoodnamesrgone said:

It is all well and good teaching your children proper terms for your parts until they start screaming, You're a PENIS, you're a  VAGINA, at each other in the middle of the grocery store when they are 2 & 4. ?    It's pretty damn funny now, but I'm pretty sure they caused at least 1 old lady to   

My daughter is 2 and she doesn't know she has a vagina because no one has ever had to touch that. If you ask her, she has a vulva.

[treehugger]

@baldricks_turnip ? yes!  Saying “vagina” when you mean “vulva” is almost as bad as using other cutesy names.  It’s not helpful.  And I hate that it is used interchangeably.  They are not the same thing!  

[front hugs > duggs]

2 hours ago, treehugger said:

@baldricks_turnip ? yes!  Saying “vagina” when you mean “vulva” is almost as bad as using other cutesy names.  It’s not helpful.  And I hate that it is used interchangeably.  They are not the same thing!  

I feel really stupid but I did not know this 

[baldricks_turnip]

1 hour ago, front hugs > duggs said:

I feel really stupid but I did not know this 

Don't feel stupid, you're far from alone in not knowing. I've met grown women who think they urinate out their vagina.