Bontragers/Bowers 6: Allison Is Married! Who Will Date Her Brothers Now?

[nelliebelle1197]

Marlin Bontrager is literally the worst person in the world this week;  if you don’t believe me, read the last thread.

[BirdgirlH]

Who will her brothers date now? - Well, I think that may have been Praise Helferich that was escorted by Denver, so she could be his gf from Minnesota. Just think - Praise Bontrager! I'm sure the Bons want to add her to the fold for that name alone!

[DrPusey]

The Marion Avenue Baptist Church Facebook page seems to have removed the negative comment about Marlin posted during the wedding.

And the commenter who said "such a beautiful wedding" is obviously living in a parallel univese.

[Italiangirl]

15 minutes ago, DrPusey said:

 

And the commenter who said "such a beautiful wedding" is obviously living in a parallel univese.

Or maybe the commenterà was one of us who had drink a little bit too much? Just to be able to go through the wedding...or maybe the wine alone wasn't enough ?

[IsmeWeatherwax]

I was surprised to see it was at the church, I thought it would be held at the Bons like the double was

[JermajestyDuggar]

30 minutes ago, IsmeWeatherwax said:

I was surprised to see it was at the church, I thought it would be held at the Bons like the double was

Me too. The wedding was more like Bryn and Mitch’s wedding. They had it at the church with a reception outside on a grassy type of area. It would have been safer for them to have it outdoors at the farm. But then again, they don’t believe in the pandemic so they don’t have to worry about it.

Edited August 16, 2020 by JermajestyDuggar

[Cults-r-us]

2 hours ago, nelliebelle1197 said:

Marlin Bontrager is literally the worst person in the world this week;  if you don’t believe me, read the last thread.

Where else is this fellow going to get a captive audience for him to bloviate, lecture and rant at? I'm sure his family is good and exhausted listening to it. Wasn't he the one at Chelsey's wedding sharing Steve's vasectomy reversal in his speech? His filter is severely absent.

[HereticHick]

That wedding ceremony was so lacking in JOY.  Do the Dads get to do more rambling speeches at the reception as well?  I am so used to reception remarks about how happy each family is to be gaining a daughter/son; how wonderful it is that the couple found each other; how they compliment each other; how the bride(s) looks beautiful, etc.  Dad Helferich talked as if he barely knew his son, much less his new daughter-in-law.

 

If Denver & Praise get hitched we can call them Prenver. Or Daze.

Edited August 16, 2020 by HereticHick

[justmy2cents]

8 minutes ago, HereticHick said:

If Denver & Praise get hitched we can call them Prenver. Or Daze.

I didn’t see this wedding, but based on all these comments If they really are a couple I hope they elope.

[BirdgirlH]

10 minutes ago, HereticHick said:

Dad Helferich talked as if he barely knew his son, much less his new daughter-in-law.

Yes - he said he was going to talk about things that would let the audience get to know them, then proceeded to tell the weird-ass anecdote where a young Jeremiah dragged an unwilling woman to church, and of Allison he just said she was his shoe-less daughter. Done!

[front hugs > duggs]

I met my parent-in-laws in person for only the third time at our wedding. They live in England and we are in the US, so that many cross-atlantic trips just weren't feasible (we had skyped plenty, and each visit lasted about two weeks, so it's not like it was just two lunches or anything, but still). I bet my father in law, after only meeting me a handful of times, could have easily spoken more personally about me than it seems Dad Helferich was able to do about his own son/DIL.

[MomJeans]

If Denver is courting a Helferich daughter - I'm beyond curious as to how much these courtships are arranged by the parents.  I was raised in a tight-knit christian community with limited dating options, and siblings marrying into the same family was still a very rare event, and didn't happen close in time. 

Just watching Marlon & Pa Helferich yesterday and the groom speak his vows, my intuition/wild speculation is that  the 'courtship' was first arranged exclusively by the dads.  

I guess in the long run, an arranged marriage versus a courtship doesn't really change anything- the couple isn't allowed to be emotionally or physically intimate regardless. 

[fundiefan]

Brother of the groom, Isaish, is a real peach. His public Facebook is all tRump, conspiracy theories and, well, willful ignorance. And anger. Lots of anger. His friends list is a real tRump fest as well. The non Bontrager dude who sang seems to be a Helferich brother in law and he is, of course, following the party line. 

It's pretty clear why the wedding was basically a political whine fest / tRump rally / hate show. That's exactly who the Helferich's appear to be. 

I feel dirty having even watched these people. 

[JermajestyDuggar]

Most fundie fathers have the sense to know that even if they believe all this garbage, they don’t talk about it during the wedding ceremonies of their kids. 

6 minutes ago, MomJeans said:

If Denver is courting a Helferich daughter - I'm beyond curious as to how much these courtships are arranged by the parents.  I was raised in a tight-knit christian community with limited dating options, and siblings marrying into the same family was still a very rare event, and didn't happen close in time. 

Just watching Marlon & Pa Helferich yesterday and the groom speak his vows, my intuition/wild speculation is that  the 'courtship' was first arranged exclusively by the dads.  

I guess in the long run, an arranged marriage versus a courtship doesn't really change anything- the couple isn't allowed to be emotionally or physically intimate regardless. 

The Bowers Bontrager double marriage was definitely arranged. But Bryn and Mitch and Chelsy and John did not seem as arranged. 

[Howl]

At least Chelsy + John definitely had/have chemistry. 

 

[nvmbr02]

1 hour ago, front hugs > duggs said:

I met my parent-in-laws in person for only the third time at our wedding. They live in England and we are in the US, so that many cross-atlantic trips just weren't feasible (we had skyped plenty, and each visit lasted about two weeks, so it's not like it was just two lunches or anything, but still). I bet my father in law, after only meeting me a handful of times, could have easily spoken more personally about me than it seems Dad Helferich was able to do about his own son/DIL.

I had met my MIL twice before we got married, both trips were for about a week. I hadn’t met my FIL. My husband had met my dad for one weekend when we had been dating for about a month and my grandma once around the same time. He met my Mom for the first time 2 days before we got married. 
It was probably a good things since my FIL might give Marlin a run for his money and while my mom is no longer alive she was difficult to deal with as well.  At least my husband and I were very open and honest about the crazy in our families so it wasn’t a shock. 

I haven’t seen much of the wedding, I had trouble viewing it yesterday. But whole the wedding style was a bit bland I didn’t hate it. I liked Allison’s dress well enough, it was better than Chesly’s IMO, and the bridesmaids dresses were pretty enough. The flowers we gorgeous and it looks like the pictures will be nice. 

What the wedding lacked in style it more than made up with in hate. ??
 

 

[fundiefan]

2 hours ago, Howl said:

At least Chelsy + John definitely had/have chemistry. 

 

I agree. I know people are different and all that, bu Jeremiah gave off zero vibes for being interested in anything. He stood stone still. He spoke in a slow, monotone voice. He looked the the microphone/pastor while saying his vows instead of looking at Allison, the woman he was vowing to. Allison seemed to be straining herself to get him to engage while at the same time restraining herself from being anything less than an adoring, submissive wife. 

John & Chelsy, on the other hand, were both bouncing with anticipation & excitement. They definitely had chemistry and it was palpable (which in and of itself is a little different for a fundie wedding, but good for them. They actually knew each other and felt something for each other and radiated with happiness).

I didn't see the triple wedding so I don't know how anyone was on the alter for those. But, Jeremiah just seemed entirely uninterested in even existing yesterday. Even if he is shy, you'd think he'd try, or at least show Allison some enthusiasm. He barely even looked at her. 

They may be a perfect match, who knows. But they definitely did not exude joy; they exhibited no chemistry. 

For Allison and all things being about appearances, her wedding did not appear to be...much of anything other than a venue for little men to express their anger.

[usedbicycle]

I hate when fundies vow to never speak negatively about their spouse. It makes me thing all their gushing compliments are phony and they secretly can't stand the guy. 

[Smash!]

Sometimes I wonder if it does even matter in their culture to genuinely like the person they‘re married to? It‘s all about having a spouse in order to live in their own household, being seen as a grown up and not a child no matter the age and most importantly, to produce arrows for his kingdom.

[ElizaB]

17 minutes ago, fundiefan said:

I agree. I know people are different and all that, bu Jeremiah gave off zero vibes for being interested in anything. He stood stone still. He spoke in a slow, monotone voice. He looked the the microphone/pastor while saying his vows instead of looking at Allison, the woman he was vowing to. Allison seemed to be straining herself to get him to engage while at the same time restraining herself from being anything less than an adoring, submissive wife. 

John & Chelsy, on the other hand, were both bouncing with anticipation & excitement. They definitely had chemistry and it was palpable (which in and of itself is a little different for a fundie wedding, but good for them. They actually knew each other and felt something for each other and radiated with happiness).

I didn't see the triple wedding so I don't know how anyone was on the alter for those. But, Jeremiah just seemed entirely uninterested in even existing yesterday. Even if he is shy, you'd think he'd try, or at least show Allison some enthusiasm. He barely even looked at her. 

They may be a perfect match, who knows. But they definitely did not exude joy; they exhibited no chemistry. 

For Allison and all things being about appearances, her wedding did not appear to be...much of anything other than a venue for little men to express their anger.

Could Jeremiah just be really shy? He could have felt awkward

[fundiefan]

1 minute ago, ElizaB said:

Could Jeremiah just be really shy? He could have felt awkward

Of course he could be and I said as much. But he still could have tried. 

[deborahlynn1979]

I wonder what Allison herself will write about the wedding? She probably won’t even mention the NINETY MINUTES of hate speech. No wonder she tore out of there like a bat out of hell: she probably had to pee! 

 

At least she got a real photographer, instead of a hideous Maxwell.

[JermajestyDuggar]

I’m also afraid this might be a mismatch. Allison is high energy, talkative, social, friendly, and engaging. Jeremiah seems to be the opposite. I suppose they could make it work if they have lots of other things in common. But if she’s expecting a romantic sort who tells her all his inner most feelings, then she is likely in for a lot of disappointment. 

[petrushka]

6 minutes ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

I’m also afraid this might be a mismatch. Allison is high energy, talkative, social, friendly, and engaging. Jeremiah seems to be the opposite. I suppose they could make it work if they have lots of other things in common. But if she’s expecting a romantic sort who tells her all his inner most feelings, then she is likely in for a lot of disappointment. 

Listening to his voice yesterday, I began to wonder if something was amiss in this pairing.  I hope it's simply Allison wanting to be married to someone not a wild eyed, intense, "visionary".

I still can't get over Marlin using the word "visionary" in reference to himself.  I hope Ma Bontrager had a few choice words with him after that rant.  I also hope the Bontrager traveling road show comes to a screeching halt. 

[JermajestyDuggar]

7 minutes ago, petrushka said:

Listening to his voice yesterday, I began to wonder if something was amiss in this pairing.  I hope it's simply Allison wanting to be married to someone not a wild eyed, intense, "visionary".

I still can't get over Marlin using the word "visionary" in reference to himself.  I hope Ma Bontrager had a few choice words with him after that rant.  I also hope the Bontrager traveling road show comes to a screeching halt. 

Don’t get your hopes up. They added Joe just so they can keep traveling after Cass and Josh couldn’t travel with them anymore. Liz is already the new Allison. She’s been writing some of the family blogs. The Bontragers know how to make their children work. Therefore Hudson and Rebs will pick up some of the slack even though they are so young. 

Family band: Denver, Lincoln, Liz, Hudson, Rebs, Joe, and sometimes Becky sings. That’s plenty for them to keep it going. 

Edited August 16, 2020 by JermajestyDuggar