M is for Mama 3: B is for Baby Boy Born

[dairyfreelife]

19 minutes ago, SuperNova said:

The #gentlenesschallenge now allows Abbie to be twice the asshole. 

"It's the talkers that test my patience. ? So I thought I'd encourage us to use especially kind words for our big kids today. Whatever that looks like for you. Maybe your big kid is a two-year-old. Maybe he's an 18 year old. Whoever they are, let's show them some love today!"

Then get a cat, Abbie, you bitch. 

I admit that I'm not very social media savvy so maybe it's my ignorance talking but if you have a challenge like the #gentlenesschallenge, shouldn't you offer some actual helpful advice? "Show them some love" isn't really constructive. 

I don't know, my cat can be really vocal sometimes. 

[Rowan]

2 hours ago, dairyfreelife said:

I don't know, my cat can be really vocal sometimes. 

For sure - mine has a whiny old lady who smokes two packs a day voice for sure, especially at 6am when she wants the faucet turned on in our master bath so she can drink the superior sink water compared to the circulating filtered pet fountain water that is available 24/7.

No, she (and her sister) aren't spoiled at all. ?

[feministxtian]

there were (and are) times I'd pay big bucks for silence at home. BUT...I'd rather encourage the kids (talk to me about the guitar player upstairs) than try to squash them. In reality, once they moved away it was TOO DAMN QUIET for me. I missed and still miss the chaos that comes with kids. Even the days I'd pray "God give me patience because if you give me strength I'm gonna need bail money" I still enjoyed the hell out of the loudmouths. 

Now it's the texting and FB messaging...ALL THE DAMN TIME! I mean #1 son was messaging me from fucking Ethiopia! He's on another business trip and just HAD to talk to mama! 

[ophelia]

So totally random, but when she mentions the 5AM body combat class, does she mean she gets up at 5AM to be able to make it on time or that the actual class starts at 5AM? My gym doesn't even open until 8PM. Probably because it is cheap af.

[JermajestyDuggar]

I’ve always guessed that Braggie’s older kids mostly stay away from her. They have a huge house so they can easily get away from her for hours if needed. If they aren’t homeschooling or cleaning, they are probably away from Braggie. The little kids (Theo and Honor) probably still follow her around because of their age. They will eventually learn its best to stay away from mama unless she wants a picture for Instagram. 

[Off the Rails]

I don't know if I can even look at her Instagram anymore. Her stories made me want to cry. I totally get wanting to lie down with the baby and hide from the kids (I do that sometimes). But your toddler found you? Toddlers are still babies, he can come snuggle! 

And WHAT THE HECK?  The other kids think it's time for Honor to be potty trained, so they're putting him on the potty??????? I'm guessing because they're sick of changing his diapers. 

 

I try to give her the benefit of the doubt with a lot of things, assuming she's just a really bad writer and communicates things wrong. But she is just harsh and unkind and checked out. It's laughable that she is a contributor to that homeschool Instagram, considering she hires out all the actual work of homeschooling. And that she went to a Charlotte Mason type homeschool conference, since she is the polar opposite of that style of learning (only a 5 minute break from school for a small child is a prime example).

 

And her gentleness challenge is so confusing to me. She did this big post about the whole reason to set this goal to speak gently is because the Bible says to. How about because yelling and criticizing and harshness hurts your kids' feelings? How about because it's disrespectful to them as people? Even the gentleness challenge is all about her, not her children. Even though her kids should be the whole point of it. 

Edited March 26, 2019 by Off the Rails
Edit because I named the wrong neglected-by-Abbie small child

[luv2laugh]

When I think of tone deaf, I think of someone like JRod. JRod honestly has no idea why she isn’t as popular and liked as Michelle Duggar. JRod continues to act and say outrageous things that only bring her more criticism and she cannot understand why she does not win favor among her followers. 

Braggie Abbie knows exactly how she comes across. She has the self-awareness of how rotten she is and has expressed some of this realization before.

Edited March 26, 2019 by luv2laugh

[JermajestyDuggar]

I agree that Ezra is tired of changing a toddler’s diapers AND the newborn’s so he is potty training Honor. It must be nice to be Braggie. She doesn’t have to parent. Because her 12 year old does it all. 

[bea]

I don't know if I can even look at her Instagram anymore. Her stories made me want to cry. I totally get wanting to lie down with the baby and hide from the kids (I do that sometimes). But your toddler found you? Toddlers are still babies, he can come snuggle! 
And WHAT THE HECK?  The other kids think it's time for Honor to be potty trained, so they're putting him on the potty??????? I'm guessing because they're sick of changing his diapers. 

That story boggles my mind. I was sure no one would believe that the other kids are potty training their brother, so I took a screenshot.

Just.... what the hell.

At least social media allows onlookers to see what the Quiverfull mindset does to the kids, who end up raising their siblings while mom is cuddling the newborn that doesn’t talk.
I think that’s one of the reasons Abbie is interesting. She’s using Instagram to present what seems to HER to be the perfectly curated life of a devoted SAH homeschooling mom of many. One who lives in a fabulous house decorated in just exactly the right whimsical trendy Anthropologie way - but they’re so thrifty and smart that they built the house themselves, and she can tell you the thrifted provenance of each item of furniture and roll of wallpaper and can of paint and throw pillow.

The thing is, bits of reality - the fact that her mom provides a LOT of childcare and homeschool instruction, the fact that Abbie has a job, that she seems to get enraged by stuff like a bunch of kids under 10 not cleaning the house to her standards, that her perfect house isn’t actually done and that she doesn’t seem to even like kids all that much - slip through. Yet she’s still under the impression that all anyone can see is the constructed image.
The people following Abbie to emulate her have to be seeing this stuff too. They can ignore it, I guess? But her curated and for-social-media-display life has a whole lot of very obvious cracks.

[ViolaSebastian]

And now a toddler in an apron is "cross-dressing." Never change, Abbie. Never change.

[JermajestyDuggar]

9 minutes ago, ViolaSebastian said:

And now a toddler in an apron is "cross-dressing." Never change, Abbie. Never change.

She thinks she’s so funny. Her jokes make me cringe. 

[Glasgowghirl]

On 3/26/2019 at 5:08 PM, JermajestyDuggar said:

She thinks she’s so funny. Her jokes make me cringe. 

She really is, I have only been following these threads for a while and already hate her almost as much as I hate Jill Rod, the only thing she has going for her over Jill Rod is that her children are not looking neglected, that is more down to her oldest child and her mother though.

[DundeeUnFundie]

She edited the status saying Shiloh has been circumcised... Now apparently he's just been sick

[JermajestyDuggar]

26 minutes ago, DundeeUnFundie said:

She edited the status saying Shiloh has been circumcised... Now apparently he's just been sick

And she deleted any comments about circumcision. Braggie really can’t handle any sort of criticism. She reminds me of Trumpie boy.

[SuperNova]

From the #gentlenesschallenge:

"I love the simplicity of "calm and kind" that a member of this group suggested. 
I've chanted it to myself several times already today--when the toddler lost it after pouring cereal on himself, when a person to whom I struggle to give grace "pulled a stunt" (in my mind), when 2+2 simply would not equal 4."

Ok, now I'm curious as to which kid is the whipping boy (or girl). She genuinely has no clue as to how truly awful she sounds. 

Let's have another:

"If you follow me over at @m.is.for.mama, then you probably have heard me talk about my struggles with helping small children practice piano. 
It's excruciating for me. 
I've been working on making it less excruciating for THEM for a while, but it seems like there's still always at least one moment where I am stabbing my finger at a key over and over saying, "THIS one. Play THIS one, for the love of Pete!" 

Today, that did not happen. And that is a true miracle of God. 
The frustration started to simmer, but I was able to say, "NOT TODAY, Satan!!" and I helped both twins practice with almost no puffs of exasperation escaping my lips and ZERO impatient words."

Excruciating. Helping her children is excruciating for her. Abbie's discriptives are harsh. And her "puffs of exasperation", yikes. Imagine how awful those piano sessions must be for her 8 year old, anxiety ridden and desparately trying not to make mistakes and get mama's wrath. 

 

Edited March 28, 2019 by SuperNova

[luv2laugh]

Can I call Braggie a bitch?

I have tried very, very hard for the past few years or so to not refer to another woman as a "bitch" but I can't help it at this moment. Braggie is a real BITCH.

Look at how she treats her fan girls. Observe how she treats her children.  Who comes first in Braggie's life? ALWAYS HERSELF, her shopping, her thrifted "Anthro-esque" clothes, her DIY projects, her gym time, etc. 

Braggie does not have 3 or 4 kids. She has EIGHT.

As we know, Braggie reads here all the time. I have a few choice words for her:
Grow up, Braggie Abbie. Take responsibility over what you've brought upon yourself and stop being a lazy jerk. You and Shaun Halberstadt are the parents, not your children. Also, your children are not your maids and chefs. Start acting like a parent instead of a 20-something year old social media addict without any responsibilities. 

Braggie is pretty much a mix of Lori Alexander and JRod. Although, unlike Lori, Braggie is younger and unlike JRod, her children have healthy BMIs. Braggie appears as narcissistic (and mean) as Lori and as histrionic as JRod.

EDIT:

She really can't control herself, can she? How amusing of her to BRAG about having 3 in diaper for "ahem, 14 months". Braggie, we all know Ezra and the other older son changed all the diapers. What about acknowledging them?

Also, on her Gentleness Challenge Instagram account, she has once again discussed how teaching her children piano infuriates her.
https://www.instagram.com/p/BviONecBQZL/

 

 

Edited March 28, 2019 by luv2laugh

[Snarkasarus Rex]

Here's a tip, Braggie.  If piano lessons are *excruciating* for you and especially your children, then STOP!  Get them a real piano teacher, and I'm sure they will enjoy it more.  And you can spend that time shopping, on Instagram or your blog!  Win win!

Or you can pay your mother to teach them piano, since you already pay her to school them.  Just sayin'...

[SuperNova]

15 minutes ago, Snarkasarus Rex said:

 If piano lessons are *excruciating* for you and especially your children, then STOP!  Get them a real piano teacher, and I'm sure they will enjoy it more.  And you can spend that time shopping, on Instagram or your blog!  Win win!

My thoughts exactly. I'm sure the cost of private lessons wouldn't be prohibitive for her.

[TuringMachine]

1 hour ago, luv2laugh said:

Can I call Braggie a bitch?

I'm surprised you haven't already, I have.

Those poor girls. I can only imagine how stressful piano practice must be fore them. 

 

[EowynW]

2 hours ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

And she deleted any comments about circumcision. Braggie really can’t handle any sort of criticism. She reminds me of Trumpie boy.

Which to me is hilarious because IME fundies are all about circumcision. The parents of one of my fundie friends hit the fucking roof when they found out the man she was marrying wasn't circumcised. They said he needed to go get it done after marriage. 

I know a lot of musicians (and good parents) who pay to have others teach their kids because teaching them themselves can be too personal and frustrating. I'll be doing the same if I have a kid. My dad taught us and it wasn't pretty, lol. 

[JermajestyDuggar]

12 minutes ago, EowynW said:

Which to me is hilarious because IME fundies are all about circumcision. The parents of one of my fundie friends hit the fucking roof when they found out the man she was marrying wasn't circumcised. They said he needed to go get it done after marriage. 

I know a lot of musicians (and good parents) who pay to have others teach their kids because teaching them themselves can be too personal and frustrating. I'll be doing the same if I have a kid. My dad taught us and it wasn't pretty, lol. 

When the “crunchy homebirthing anti vaccine”  people are fundies, I bet they are less likely to circumcise. I know a few of the fundies we talk about on FJ have said they don’t. I know both the Nogs and TAMs family don’t circumcise. My guess is that there are a few more but they don’t broadcast it for the world. 

[Hashtag Blessed]

3 hours ago, SuperNova said:

"If you follow me over at @m.is.for.mama, then you probably have heard me talk about my struggles with helping small children practice piano. 
It's excruciating for me. 
I've been working on making it less excruciating for THEM for a while, but it seems like there's still always at least one moment where I am stabbing my finger at a key over and over saying, "THIS one. Play THIS one, for the love of Pete!" 

God, she sounds like an absolute nightmare. Is there any minor annoyance that she doesn't berate her children for? Poorly arranged throw pillows and mistakes in piano practice are not worth a reaction like that. Seriously, if it's so excruciating then stop! Do they even want to play the piano? 

[JermajestyDuggar]

4 minutes ago, Hashtag Blessed said:

God, she sounds like an absolute nightmare. Is there any minor annoyance that she doesn't berate her children for? Poorly arranged throw pillows and mistakes in piano practice are not worth a reaction like that. Seriously, if it's so excruciating then stop! Do they even want to play the piano? 

This isn’t the first time she’s talked about hating piano lessons. She could easily hire someone to provide the lessons. But then she couldn’t play the martyr. She’s a very obvious mommy martyr. 

[DancingPhalanges]

2 minutes ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

This isn’t the first time she’s talked about hating piano lessons. She could easily hire someone to provide the lessons. But then she couldn’t play the martyr. She’s a very obvious mommy martyr. 

Right? It’s just logical to take them to lessons if she hates it so much. It’s always about her. Does she EVER talk about what piece of music they are learning and how well they’ve done?

I can’t find a post or video specifically about what they’ve learned or a sample video of a child playing. Maybe I missed it. 

If a child is helped in any of this ego feeding #gentlenessproject bs then great. Otherwise, we know what she’s up to. Admiration and ego inflation. 

[tankgirl]

10 hours ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

When the “crunchy homebirthing anti vaccine”  people are fundies, I bet they are less likely to circumcise. I know a few of the fundies we talk about on FJ have said they don’t. I know both the Nogs and TAMs family don’t circumcise. My guess is that there are a few more but they don’t broadcast it for the world. 

A bigger part is probably expense. In a lot of areas,  circumcision stopped being paid for by some insurance and most state medical plans. 

Circumcision numbers of kids in areas that had state funds stop paying for the operation, saw huge drops in the number of boys having the surgery. It can cost $500-$900 (numbers based on what one person I know paid 10 years ago mind you) out of pocket often changes quickly what you believe  when you just dont have the money and already paid for a home birth. In some states and not always the ones you think of, less then 30% of boys are under going circumcision, and dropping. Not getting into any debates on the topic, but truely wonder if costs might be a big decision maker on these huge families, not what the bible actually says ironically. 

Edited March 29, 2019 by tankgirl