Jill and Derwood 62: Law School Rumors and Boring Sam

[MoonFace]

On 7/20/2018 at 1:14 PM, Carm_88 said:

I am sorry, I cannot see Derick answering to anyone. He could try for law school and use all his vague ways but really, you're not going to fool professors. And where is he getting money for law school? He grifted the money for his fake missioncation program. As if he could afford law school! 

I still want to know how his mind (heart, or whatever body part) was changed from being a missionary to being a lawyer?   

It's as if the idiot is setting himself up for (more) failure. 

[Born Skeptic]

19 hours ago, mango_fandango said:

There are different levels of neonatal care over here (from what I understand), plus it depends on the hospital. In general there are three levels. NICU over here tends to refer to the sickest/smallest babies. The next level up is the High Dependency Unit (HDU) and then the “top” level is SCBU (special care baby unit). My brother was born at term, but was “spotty” at birth; don’t know the exact reason. It was enough for him to require a short NICU stay and antibiotics, but I don’t think he stayed there long. 

Neonatal care in the US is classified as different levels as well.  

Level I is the newborn well baby unit.  They also care for late term premies (35 weeks +) and low birthweight babies that are healthy and don't need specialized care.  

Level II a/k/a Special Care nursery provides care to stable to moderately ill infants, premies greater than 32 weeks gestation and/or greater than 3.3 pounds/1500 grams.  Babies in this unit have problems that are expected to be short term and of minor complexity without an urgent need for sub-specialty care or extended ventilation assistance.

Level III:  Specialty and Sub-speciality level care for infants with significant medical or surgical needs and infants born at 27 to 32 weeks gestation or under 3.3 pounds/1500 grams.  Level III units can provide complex life support for as long as necessary.  A broad range of pediatric medical sub specialists and surgical specialists are easily accessible.

Level IV:  Critical Care - Highest level of care - Level IV Includes the capabilities of level III with additional capabilities and experience in the care of the most complex and critically ill infants and micro premies 22 to 26 weeks gestation under 1.8 lbs/822 grams.  Pediatric medical and pediatric surgical specialty consultants continuously available 24 hours a day - capacity for advanced surgical repair of complex conditions - intensive care for complex medical issues.  Level IV NICU’s generally operate on a regional basis and are often associated with medical schools and advanced research facilities.  LAST TIME I CHECKED THERE WERE LESS THAN 100 LEVEL IV NICU'S in the US - some states had none while more populous states (like California with 7) had multiple.  Areas without a NICU in state had a covering NICU within life flight distance.

 

When my daughter was in a Level IV NICU we mat a number of families who traveled from another region of the state, or another state entirely, to meet their babies who had been life-flighted to our hospital.  We were extremely fortunate that we lived less than a mile away.  We have several "forever friends" that we met during that time who took us up on our offer of a quiet bedroom for a nap, a chance to shower in a non institutional shower, or a good relaxing home cooked meal.  We have also kept in touch with the Neonatologist (who we discovered was a down the street neighbor) over the years and he said that the lower level units had been renovated to be more "homey" and private but the Level IV unit by necessity remained a big open room with curtain partitioned spaces for each isolate.  With babies that sick, there is no time to deal with walls, doors, and privacy. When we were there, they just asked all of the visiting parents to step into the lounge while they admitted a critical new born or dealt with an emergency situation.  I assume that they still do this.

1 hour ago, AtlanticTug said:

I realized the other day that I only have 1 photo of my daughter in the incubator and a couple of photos of her being held by me in the NICU being fed some supplementary pumped milk and formula. That's it. ...

Atlantic Tug,

I refused to take any pictures of our daughter while she was in the NICU.  Several nurses tried to tell me that I would want them someday but I wasn't buying it.  When she finally got home, I unpacked the bags and bags of stuff (baby blankest, diapers, wipes, cases - multiple - of formula, etc and found an envelope of pictures of our baby that the staff had taken throughout her stay.  Many had funny captions on them - others were just dated.  I laughed.  I cried.  I loved them all.  I have not looked at them in years, but I should drag them out and torture her with them soon and show her where my prematurely grey hair came from.

[AprilQuilt]

20 hours ago, mango_fandango said:

The only experience I have with this kind of thing is through watching One Born Every Minute. I remember there was this episode where a woman had triplets; two got to go home relatively quickly but one was in hospital for months, he did eventually go home. 

Oh god, I remember that one. It was terrifying just to watch. Properly heartbreaking. 

[Nikedagain?]

21 hours ago, mango_fandango said:

Hugs to anyone who’s had to go through having a baby in the NICU. I can’t imagine how stressful it must be.

There are different levels of neonatal care over here (from what I understand), plus it depends on the hospital. In general there are three levels. NICU over here tends to refer to the sickest/smallest babies. The next level up is the High Dependency Unit (HDU) and then the “top” level is SCBU (special care baby unit). My brother was born at term, but was “spotty” at birth; don’t know the exact reason. It was enough for him to require a short NICU stay and antibiotics, but I don’t think he stayed there long. 

The only experience I have with this kind of thing is through watching One Born Every Minute. I remember there was this episode where a woman had triplets; two got to go home relatively quickly but one was in hospital for months, he did eventually go home. 

My son was born at 34-35 weeks and was 7.5 pounds. (first baby was over 10 pounds right on time). I had an emergency C section because his heart rate dropped quickly. We were in a really big city at a huge hospital and he was in the NICU for a couple of weeks. He had some trouble regulating his o2 and a bit of pneumonia. It was such a huge surprise, the whole thing happened so fast. Very surreal and shocking. (He also had 3 very significant hernias that had to be repaired at 3 months and went back to the NICU.)  Both times he looked so HUGE in there. I mean, like this giant baby!  I felt so much compassion for the parents with the true preemies. It was just so hard to watch and I felt so bad about my ginormous baby! But even at 34-35 they never adjusted his age for any milestones and he was perfectly fine. I asked our specialist and he said they would only adjust the age for a baby born earlier and that he really didn't qualify as a preemie, even though early. He just needed a bit of extra help at the beginning! He nursed like a champ and gained weight well and hit all of his milestones on time!

[mango_fandango]

Brother was actually in special care rather than NICU, but still worrying, particularly as Mum’s previous birth had been a stillbirth (which she knew about before the labour). They never really figured out what was wrong, but he’s not had any issues since. 

My cousin was born early (about a month or so) as my aunt had HELLP (type of pre-eclampsia). He was an emergency section, and for some medical reason my aunt had to be under general anaesthetic. 

Apparently my university friend was born 7 weeks early and the family were told to say their goodbyes as she was so ill (found this out through a birthday post the mum made on Facebook)... obviously no major issues since, as friend got into a grammar school (selective, but not fee-paying) and into a top university. That must be a horrible situation (obviously even worse if the baby does die). It’s amazing what modern science can do. It really angers me when fundies say that all they need is God. It’s so, so irresponsible.

[Born Skeptic]

too late for me to edit my post above but I apologize for the typos and random CAPS.  I was thinking faster than my fingers can type.

[SassyPants]

In 2014 when my own postpartum daughter was very sick, hospitalized, and needing me to step in and help care for her newborn, I retired after 35 years of NICU nursing. All these stories remind me of my very busy career. I am sorry to all FJers who have had a NICU experience...it can be a very painful place to be.

[HarleyQuinn]

4 hours ago, MoonFace said:

I still want to know how his mind (heart, or whatever body part) was changed from being a missionary to being a lawyer?   

It's as if the idiot is setting himself up for (more) failure. 

I think it was his victim complex. He's so persecuted that now he needs to fight for it. 

[Ais]

9 hours ago, AprilQuilt said:

Oh god, I remember that one. It was terrifying just to watch. Properly heartbreaking. 

I cried the whole way through that one, it was baby William I think. His poor mums didn't even want to buy a pram. Did they buy a triple and explain where the missing baby was or buy a double which to them felt like saying he didn't matter/exist.

 

[Chewing Gum]

27 minutes ago, Ais said:

I cried the whole way through that one, it was baby William I think. His poor mums didn't even want to buy a pram. Did they buy a triple and explain where the missing baby was or buy a double which to them felt like saying he didn't matter/exist.

 

I just looked this one up, and apparently they lost him in the end to the rotavirius at 20months. So unfair after their long battle.

[AprilQuilt]

5 minutes ago, Chewing Gum said:

I just looked this one up, and apparently they lost him in the end to the rotavirius at 20months. So unfair after their long battle.

oh no, how incredibly sad. Those poor parents. They were so incredibly dignified and loving, what awful stuff to go through. It's my prego hormones probably, but I'm shedding a bit of a tear.

[Kittikatz]

My NICU experience was over thirty years ago. I was six when by brother was delivered by emergency cesarean section due to sudden onset pre-eclampsia (? spelling). My mother almost died - in fact my father took me to see her the day after the birth and told me she was going to die, took me into her room and left me there. I will never recover from the smell of that hospital and the sight of my mother hooked up to all sorts of tubes and monitors. She was barley conscious, and I tried to spoon feed her red jello while I begged her to wake up. Several days later, my father walked in while I was trying to get her to eat. Needless to say, I caught hell from my father for feeding her off the hospital tray because it wasn't kosher - I remember looking up at him telling him bluntly that I didn't care, she couldn't get better if she didn't have anything to eat. Funnily enough, my mother's first memories of waking up after the surgery were of me feeding her jello and talking to her - she said it reminded her that she had to get better, so it was worth getting slapped for. 

Shortly there after I was taken upstairs to the NICU and instructed on how to scrub and gown up. It was a category 3, but in an old hospital (the new hospital was being finished off at the time) so the incubators and baby trays (no idea what they were/are called) from two hospitals were all packed into a very tight space. My brother was in a clear tray, under bright lights, wearing a blind fold and connected to all manner of tubes and covered with what looked like bubble wrap. To my eyes he didn't even look human. I was then told to name him, and totally blanked out on my mother's chosen name, so I wound up naming him what my father wanted. 

In the twenty three months that followed, the baby endured 16 surgeries, and was only out of the NICU for a few weeks at a time. I spent most of those months doing school work on the floor (home school flexibility!) of the nursing stations and spending all hours roaming various hospitals by myself - mostly because my parents spent every minute they could at my brother's bedside while I didn't even want to look at him, much less all the other very sick babies. On the upside, I got to know the floor plans and all the access tunnels (and the wonders of pneumatic tubes) really well, spoke to a lot of different hospital staff, and have strong opinions on the stupidity of 80's modern architecture. In the end, my brother's body couldn't digest any nutrients, so he was sent home to die. Thankfully my parents got a small clue and sent me away so I didn't have to see that part of the odyssey. Not surprisingly, their marriage went from bad to awful in the aftermath of all this. 

To this day jello, NICUs, doctors and babies all terrify me. I understand that now they have better guidelines about treatment and assistance for families with older children, but that experience can impact the entire family. I do wonder what some of the  Duggar children made out of Josie's NICU stay, and if any of them found it traumatizing. From the TV show it looked like they weren't immersed in it to the extent I was, but it will be interesting to see if it is ever addressed from their POV or if they maintain the singular Miracle Josie narrative their parents spun while on camera. 

My sympathies to anyone who has had a NICU experience. They are incredibly stressful - even when there is a positive outcome and a healthy baby gets to go home from the hospital. My thanks also to the NICU staff. That has to be one of the most difficult jobs out there.  

[HarleyQuinn]

Jill's riveting new youtube video of Sam's 1st birthday is hilariously pathetic. I don't know why she thinks people want to see this. 

[apandaaries]

So on the birthday post, she also had this note: "The same candle Derick and Israel had on their first cakes!"

Derick?! Cathy saved his first candle? Is that a thing?

ETA: I really love how sweet and kind Izzy is towards his brother. 

[justoneoftwo]

1 minute ago, apandaaries said:

So on the birthday post, she also had this note: "The same candle Derick and Israel had on their first cakes!"

Derick?! Cathy saved his first candle? Is that a thing?

I can see that, parents save all kinds of things. 

[singsingsing]

Jill's an odd duck, for sure. Like the vibe I get from Derick is petty/mean/nasty, but the vibe I get from Jill is just... clueless.

[TheOneAndOnly]

Did they reuse Derick's first candle on Izzy's cake, or were there two candles? I get being sentimental and saving things but if they reused it I'd be wondering just how poor ARE these people?

[justoneoftwo]

4 minutes ago, TheOneAndOnly said:

Did they reuse Derick's first candle on Izzy's cake, or were there two candles? I get being sentimental and saving things but if they reused it I'd be wondering just how poor ARE these people?

Why wouldn't you reuse it, its been lit at most 3 times for how long each time, 45 seconds?  Not reusing it from Izzy would seem odd to me, and really wasteful.  I could see not keeping it for 30 years or whatever from Derick, but knowing your going to have more kids, save that thing.

[TheOneAndOnly]

I just watched the birthday videos. That was...interesting. The adult guests looked bored to tears, Jill was trying WAY too hard and when it came to letting Sam have his cake it got weird. Isn't part of the fun of giving a baby a cake seeing what they do with it? They didn't give him any utensils, he didn't seem to want to get his hands sticky and then the adults couldn't respect what he was doing and had to keep putting his hands in the cake even though he wasn't liking that. And a Oklahoma State University theme for a 1-year-old's party? Really Derick, either go back and take classes there or get a job as a janitor or something since you seem to miss it so much.

#Ifeelbitchy #yaaaaay #Iwantcakenow

16 minutes ago, justoneoftwo said:

Why wouldn't you reuse it, its been lit at most 3 times for how long each time, 45 seconds?  Not reusing it from Izzy would seem odd to me, and really wasteful.  I could see not keeping it for 30 years or whatever from Derick, but knowing your going to have more kids, save that thing.

Yeah I have a drawer with a pile of number candles from various family member's birthdays that we reuse. I just felt like mocking the Dillards. lol

[KelseyAnn]

2 hours ago, justoneoftwo said:

I can see that, parents save all kinds of things. 

My mom was the world's worst mother and even she kept my first communion dress and cake topper. 

[Nikedagain?]

Are those.... CAMPING CHAIRS I see??

[nst]

4 hours ago, justoneoftwo said:

I can see that, parents save all kinds of things. 

haven't you seen their warehouses ?

 

[zee_four]

On ‎7‎/‎26‎/‎2018 at 4:17 PM, Born Skeptic said:

Neonatal care in the US is classified as different levels as well.  

Level I is the newborn well baby unit.  They also care for late term premies (35 weeks +) and low birthweight babies that are healthy and don't need specialized care.  

Level II a/k/a Special Care nursery provides care to stable to moderately ill infants, premies greater than 32 weeks gestation and/or greater than 3.3 pounds/1500 grams.  Babies in this unit have problems that are expected to be short term and of minor complexity without an urgent need for sub-specialty care or extended ventilation assistance.

Level III:  Specialty and Sub-speciality level care for infants with significant medical or surgical needs and infants born at 27 to 32 weeks gestation or under 3.3 pounds/1500 grams.  Level III units can provide complex life support for as long as necessary.  A broad range of pediatric medical sub specialists and surgical specialists are easily accessible.

Level IV:  Critical Care - Highest level of care - Level IV Includes the capabilities of level III with additional capabilities and experience in the care of the most complex and critically ill infants and micro premies 22 to 26 weeks gestation under 1.8 lbs/822 grams.  Pediatric medical and pediatric surgical specialty consultants continuously available 24 hours a day - capacity for advanced surgical repair of complex conditions - intensive care for complex medical issues.  Level IV NICU’s generally operate on a regional basis and are often associated with medical schools and advanced research facilities.  LAST TIME I CHECKED THERE WERE LESS THAN 100 LEVEL IV NICU'S in the US - some states had none while more populous states (

Our level IV NICU at Children's Hospital Colorado (and I guess now on the other side of Denver at Rocky Mountain CHildren's/St. Luke's) takes a 10 state area (CO, WY, UT, NM, KS, MT, NE for sure parts of AZ, parts of ID, parts of OK and possibly even the Dakotas)

It's kind of crazy the massive area the specialized hospitals in Denver serve. I was fortunate enough that my son didn't need the NICU but I have friends who have and have met people from literally all over the country)

:hugs that your daughter is doing well!:

[Satan'sFortress]

6 hours ago, Kittikatz said:

My NICU experience was over thirty years ago. I was six when by brother was delivered by emergency cesarean section due to sudden onset pre-eclampsia (? spelling). My mother almost died - in fact my father took me to see her the day after the birth and told me she was going to die, took me into her room and left me there. I will never recover from the smell of that hospital and the sight of my mother hooked up to all sorts of tubes and monitors. She was barley conscious, and I tried to spoon feed her red jello while I begged her to wake up. Several days later, my father walked in while I was trying to get her to eat. Needless to say, I caught hell from my father for feeding her off the hospital tray because it wasn't kosher - I remember looking up at him telling him bluntly that I didn't care, she couldn't get better if she didn't have anything to eat. Funnily enough, my mother's first memories of waking up after the surgery were of me feeding her jello and talking to her - she said it reminded her that she had to get better, so it was worth getting slapped for. 

Shortly there after I was taken upstairs to the NICU and instructed on how to scrub and gown up. It was a category 3, but in an old hospital (the new hospital was being finished off at the time) so the incubators and baby trays (no idea what they were/are called) from two hospitals were all packed into a very tight space. My brother was in a clear tray, under bright lights, wearing a blind fold and connected to all manner of tubes and covered with what looked like bubble wrap. To my eyes he didn't even look human. I was then told to name him, and totally blanked out on my mother's chosen name, so I wound up naming him what my father wanted. 

In the twenty three months that followed, the baby endured 16 surgeries, and was only out of the NICU for a few weeks at a time. I spent most of those months doing school work on the floor (home school flexibility!) of the nursing stations and spending all hours roaming various hospitals by myself - mostly because my parents spent every minute they could at my brother's bedside while I didn't even want to look at him, much less all the other very sick babies. On the upside, I got to know the floor plans and all the access tunnels (and the wonders of pneumatic tubes) really well, spoke to a lot of different hospital staff, and have strong opinions on the stupidity of 80's modern architecture. In the end, my brother's body couldn't digest any nutrients, so he was sent home to die. Thankfully my parents got a small clue and sent me away so I didn't have to see that part of the odyssey. Not surprisingly, their marriage went from bad to awful in the aftermath of all this. 

To this day jello, NICUs, doctors and babies all terrify me. I understand that now they have better guidelines about treatment and assistance for families with older children, but that experience can impact the entire family. I do wonder what some of the  Duggar children made out of Josie's NICU stay, and if any of them found it traumatizing. From the TV show it looked like they weren't immersed in it to the extent I was, but it will be interesting to see if it is ever addressed from their POV or if they maintain the singular Miracle Josie narrative their parents spun while on camera. 

My sympathies to anyone who has had a NICU experience. They are incredibly stressful - even when there is a positive outcome and a healthy baby gets to go home from the hospital. My thanks also to the NICU staff. That has to be one of the most difficult jobs out there.  

@Kittikatz Thank you for sharing your story.  It was beautifully written and really affected me. 

[Gillyweed]

I was a NICU baby. I was born at 34 weeks, after my mom spent 9 weeks in the hospital following a severe car crash. I was extremely fortunate and didn't have any of the problems they thought I would. Still, I spent about a week in the NICU, and was one of the biggest babies there at 4 lbs. (Although I did apparently have a machine monitor my breathing at night when I went home)  

I obviously don't have any first hand memories of this experience, but my grandma recently gave me a polaroid of her and my grandfather looking into my incubator, where I was hooked up to a bunch of machines. It's one of my favorite pictures of them. 

On another note, I am a member of a student-run philanthropy that raises money for our local children's hospital. $1 can buy about 8 preemie diapers for babies in the NICU. If you ever wanted to help out a stranger, donating even $5 to your local children's hopsital can go such a long way.