Josiah and Lauren Part 8: One Week to the Wedding (Now Married)

[Kangaroo]

1 hour ago, Quiver Full of Kittens said:

I was in a black wedding just about three years ago. As maid of honor, I wore a black knee length dress, white sash, and red shoes. The other bridesmaids wore black knee length dresses (all different) red sashes, and black shoes. Our bouquets were red, white, and black silk roses. 

Spoiler

Did it look strikingly like Zach and Whitney Bates' Christmas themed wedding?

[nastyhobbitses]

2 hours ago, Alice in Fundieland said:

No tv and no pets for the first year of marriage is the advice JimBob and Michelle were given. 

I mean, if neither of you are coming into the relationship with pets, I think it's sensible to wait a little while to commit to a pet you jointly own and take care of to figure out your dynamic when it comes to dividing household labor and taking care of finances, and to figure out what the situation with kids will be if you plan to have them, since certain animals will need to be socialized to young children, and certain breeds/species are better for kids than others. 

3 hours ago, Jenn The Heathen said:

My aunt did this.  I was in 6th grade and a junior bridesmaid and yeah, all black on a 12 year is interesting.

As someone who was once a 12-year-old who doodled Evanescence lyrics on her binder and refused to wear any color lighter than purple because my soul was a pit of darkness, I would have been so fucking down for formal events where I was mandated to wear black. 

[SapphireSlytherin]

I finally got the video to play.

She's not hanging onto his arm, she's smashing her boob into the back of his arm with all her might because NOW she can (when she couldn't just five minutes prior to when this video was recorded). lol

I agree that Josiah looks dead inside, and he sounds like he's just parroting what he's heard his father and brothers say, all his life. IMO, he doesn't know himself, he doesn't know what he wants, but he knows this marriage was expected of him - especially after the failed courtship with Marjorie. He's toeing the line and doing what he thinks he has to do. I wish he had been allowed to think for himself.

[anjulibai]

No TV or pets for the first year, but sure, add pregnancy and a baby into the mix. Because that's not going to take time away from "getting to know" your spouse. 

Fundie logic. 

[Million Children For Jesus]

My initial reaction was that Si looked like Peeta Mellark when he got called as tribute. Resigned, but unsure, and not really being presented with any other options, he might as well make the best effort.

She seemed genuinely thrilled to be a wife, and she was taught to be thrilled, so that is to be expected. His body language wasn’t the most affectionate, and he missed some of her social cues, but he has been trained not to respond to women, so that may take a little time to undo. 

I believe he was sincere when he said he thought she was “the one,” and that his lack of enthusiasm may be, hopefully, due to stress about the demands and expectations of their lifestyle more so than his feelings about her as a person. He has watched five out of six of his siblings have instant families after getting married, so he has seen first hand the lack of time they had for each other, and that could be causing him to be pensive. 

Or... he was tired.

[Quiver Full of Kittens]

28 minutes ago, Kangaroo said:

  Hide contents

Did it look strikingly like Zach and Whitney Bates' Christmas themed wedding?

Less fundie modest, but yes. Biggest difference is the bride had a strapless gown with a red sash. 

[Gobsmacked]

Please can some one post the video because I cannot get it to play. 

Thanks

 

[Jug Band Baby]

I just spent an hour looking for Lauren's instagram.  Can someone please share it?

[HideousGreenShirt]

@louisa05  please, please I beg of you, share photos of these horrid sounding dresses?

 I've only been a child bridesmaid for cousins in big Greek weddings in the 80's. The first one was gross peachy brown silk dupion with cream roses stitched all over. Her sister's wedding was shiny baby pink and had white roses. Both were big, poufy princess style things, neither marriage lasted and we were supposed to destroy all evidence of both... But still have photos! 

[AnnEggBlandHer?]

3 hours ago, Alice in Fundieland said:

No tv and no pets for the first year of marriage is the advice JimBob and Michelle were given. 

But a pregnancy and child within 9 months of the honeymoon isn’t a distraction? Ugh these people. 

[feministxtian]

My one stepdaughter had a "black and white" wedding. The bridesmaids all wore black dresses (of their own choosing) and black shoes. The groomsmen wore black suits, white shirts and red ties. The groom wore a black suit, black shirt and red tie. My husband (father of the bride) wore black suit, white shirt, black tie. Her dress was a strapless sorta A-line affair. 

I still liked my wedding best. My poor hubby was sweating bullets when we got married. I guess he was afraid I'd back out. I still tease him about it. I wore a skirt and blouse, he wore nice pants and a dress shirt. Trying to work on a 20th anniversary staycation. we'll see what kind of concerts/shows/hockey games are that weekend. 

[SapphireSlytherin]

Our wedding was supposed to be at the courthouse, but my mom got wind of it (this is several years AFTER the full-on bow-on-the-ass, puffed-sleeve, cathedral train dress wedding to GryffindorDisappointment's father). I ended up wearing a beige linen sheath dress and DH wore black pants and a black wool blazer that he brought with him from England. My mom arranged for music, flowers, preacher, church(!!!), a new dress and shoes for GryffDis, and four family members to show up - with 24 hours' notice.

Our 20th is next year - in May.  

[FaithAndReason]

So will the next Duggar baby due date be March 23, 2019? HAHAHAHAHA   

Not funny. 

[Daisy0322]

2 minutes ago, SapphireSlytherin said:

- with 24 hours' notice.
 

Hot damn that's impressive! Your mother needs her own TLC show about last minute weddings. Waste no time weddings 

[VelociRapture]

Josiah may have been one of the more vocal Duggars and he may have years of experience being filmed, but that doesn’t mean he’s comfortable being one half of the center of THAT much attention. I mean, the Duggars have huge weddings as it is - anywhere between 800 and 1100 guests if I remember right. That’s a lot of pressure already even for people who are pretty used to that sort of thing. For example, I’m pretty sure Prince Harry was fairly nervous when he got married in May and he literally grew up being watched by millions (if not billions) of people. 

On top of all those invited guests, you have the knowledge that millions more may eventually watch how your wedding turned out on the show. You have to smile until your face is killing you for the TLC cameras and for the professional phptographs that will be plastered all over a major national entertainment magazine. You can’t drop your smile or make a weird face for a second (ala Jinger leaving the Church after her wedding) or dare to show a bit of fatigue because you run the risk of people turning that one meaningless moment into the defining moment of your day. For instance, Jinger’s smile was slightly strained in some of her wedding photos and people immediately began assuming something was really wrong because of that, but when the episode aired it became pretty clear that nothing was wrong and she was probably just tired at that point. 

All that to say, maybe people should hold off on the judgements until the actual episode airs. He could just be the type of person who doesn’t come across as 100% comfortable in posed photos and he may not be comfortable doing those little thank you videos they do either. 

[SapphireSlytherin]

21 minutes ago, Daisy0322 said:

Hot damn that's impressive! Your mother needs her own TLC show about last minute weddings. Waste no time weddings 

She was amazing (she died four years ago very unexpectedly) at organizing things.

 

[singsingsing]

My speculation about Josiah is based on a lot more than what he looked like in his wedding photos/video. But it's still just speculation. Sometimes people really surprise you, and the ones you think are the happiest are actually the most miserable, whereas the ones you expected to be miserable actually end up doing really well. Nothing but time will tell. 

One thing I think most of us can agree on, though, is that fundamentalism is a really crappy system, which most people suffer under and are ill-suited to, and the ones who just happen to thrive in it are the lucky few.

[Kangaroo]

So now there married and we're still waiting on more photos, anyone want to guess a honeymoon destination?

I could see them going to Canada, the UK or France. They don't strike me as the sort of people who want to go somewhere too foreign (too much language barrier and strange foods kind of places), so these seem like fairly safe, but nice destinations at this time of year. Plenty to film for the show, but also plenty of nice things for them to enjoy.

[Mama Mia]

48 minutes ago, HideousGreenShirt said:

@louisa05  please, please I beg of you, share photos of these horrid sounding dresses?

 I've only been a child bridesmaid for cousins in big Greek weddings in the 80's. The first one was gross peachy brown silk dupion with cream roses stitched all over. Her sister's wedding was shiny baby pink and had white roses. Both were big, poufy princess style things, neither marriage lasted and we were supposed to destroy all evidence of both... But still have photos! 

This brings up a very good question - what do you do with all the photos when the marriage ends ???? My family has thrown some very pretty weddings (although not a one would hold up to FJ etiquette standards   ), with gorgeous brides — and lovely bridesmaids, and handsome grooms and groomsmen . They are often the only formalist photos any of the adults have.

But overall we are absolutely abysmal at staying married. Like, really, really bad at it. What are we supposed to do with the pictures ??????

[SapphireSlytherin]

3 minutes ago, Mama Mia said:

what do you do with all the photos when the marriage ends ????

I pulled the "non-couple" photos from the album and kept them. The rest I gave to my daughter. I have no idea what she did with them.

[CorruptionInc.]

3 hours ago, louisa05 said:

I have five bridesmaids dresses from the 90s. Blue, blue, blue, blue and beige floral. 

Wow that's a 90's flashback if there ever was one! Right on trend I imagine too.

I've had Bridesmaids dresses from the 90's, 00's and the 10's. I can't say I really like any of them apart from the one I most recently wore. It was a nice navy blue. It's probably the only one I can still fit in to haha!! I'm also not sure why I kept them... I prefer more space for books! I know the one I wore in 2003 I love love loved at the time, but looking at it now...

The thing that strikes me about Lauren is that her and I have the exact same face shape. The angles and everything. I wouldn't say the rest of the face like me, but I have honestly never seen anyone with the same face shape as me, which is angular and round at the same time; ends up looking square-ish... 

I thought straight away Anna had something to do with the sewing when I saw the picture. I need to get back to my sewing, so much fabric with garments planned...

 

[luv2laugh]

As a disclaimer, I am only making assumptions from what I’ve observed here.

Josiah is very outgoing and seemed ecstatic to be courting the super spunky, outgoing, ambitious, and independent Marjorie. Marjorie and her family clearly broke his heart after breaking up (likely with all the scandals).

Josiah seemed attracted to that sass and spunk that Marjorie had. Lauren is the complete OPPOSITE. Lauren, who comes from IBLP royalty, has been trained to be a very submissive Proverbs 31 wife and is clearly going all out doing her best to act the part. She probably feels super pressured as well, to behave this way as this is all still new to her and all eyes are on her.

Over time, it is possible that Josiah might encourage Lauren to relax and not be so submissive. He may even tell her he sees her as an equal partner and encourage her to act as an equal, not his servant. As a trained submissive wife, she’ll have to go along with Josiah’s wishes. If Josiah tells her to relax, put her feet up, and let him cook dinner for the night, she will have to relax. I think there is hope for her. 

[Sky with diamonds]

On 6/30/2018 at 4:02 PM, breakfree said:

They both look dead inside. 

Catching up. I hoped Si of all people would look happier on his wedding day. This pic is like he isn't even trying to smile. Maybe a long emotional day for him?

[Don'tlikekoolaid]

Josiah had the wherewithal to be fabulous but now we will never know what he could have become.  Jim Boob and Mechele are ghastly.  I had great hope for Si and hope he can find fulfillment in his life.

[louisa05]

2 hours ago, HideousGreenShirt said:

@louisa05  please, please I beg of you, share photos of these horrid sounding dresses?

 I've only been a child bridesmaid for cousins in big Greek weddings in the 80's. The first one was gross peachy brown silk dupion with cream roses stitched all over. Her sister's wedding was shiny baby pink and had white roses. Both were big, poufy princess style things, neither marriage lasted and we were supposed to destroy all evidence of both... But still have photos! 

They were all at my mother's house. Not sure if they are still there. And I don't know where the photos from the actual weddings are. The one where we looked like deranged garden fairies...I could be blackmailed with those photos. Pastel blue satin dress completely lined in taffeta; they were custom made. It was an A-line dress that the pattern suggested be made in cotton or another light fabric that would flow. But the bride's exact words when explaining the fabric choice: "It's not a wedding without bridesmaids in satin and taffeta". The night before the wedding, we successfully stood one up by itself at one of the other bridesmaid's houses just because we had a hunch they could stand on their own on account of the taffeta lining. We had the following nightmare accessories handmade by the bride: flower wreathes for our heads with ribbons that hung down to our butts (hair was required to be in an up-do so no one missed the ribbons which also had beads on them and the flowers were a strange aqua color not found in nature), chokers which were a satin ribbon with a large pink fabric rose smack in the middle and earrings made out of those tiny pink fabric roses with the green leaves around them that are frequently seen on baby booties. 

ETA: The top of the dress was adorned with a big lace bow which the bride decided to add at the last minute by pinning tiny loops of fabric to the necklines with safety pins. The lace shoved through it and tied in a giant bow was about 12 inches wide so the effect of the tiny loops was really awful.