Lori Alexander 42: Biblically A Bitch, Now Dressed Up In White Privilege

[mango_fandango]

Urgh.

Lori is a bitch.

Rachelle is awesome. 

[seasonsoflife]

7 hours ago, TeddyBonkers said:

That bedroom cannot be the master. Besides being too small, the bed is almost up against the window (the curtainless window! or maybe I'm just weird about having curtains). Why have one person up against the window? They would have to crawl over someone if they woke up before their bed partner.

Maybe it's just me, but I put the bed in the middle of the room if there is going to be more than one person in it.

If that is the master bedroom that is just impractical...and depressing. It looks like those furnished apartments people keep to rent to tourists with the bare minimum, except worse.  

That has to be a spare room, unless they basically have zero belongings? 

[AlwaysDiscerning]

A riddle-- why does a bed have to be made if no one slept in it and it's a guest room? Unless that is where her daughter recently stayed.

[SuperNova]

I just watched the video. Everything looks so sterile. If Tupperware made homes Lori's house could be the ad. No offense to Tupperware. I know it's BEC and a matter of personal preference but I really thought she would have better taste. I have a friend who doesn't like knick knacks and has a home as similarly sparse as Lori's. The difference is that her home is elegant and restrained with lots of warm colors. 

[MarblesMom]

12 hours ago, Hane said:

Our church has a rule that the secretary cannot be a member of the congregation, to help avoid her winding up enmeshed in any drama.

THIS! My only worry about joining.  Pastor assures me that any drama needs to be directed to him.... but what happens when he leaves in a few years?!  

[refugee]

51 minutes ago, SuperNova said:

I just watched the video. Everything looks so sterile. If Tupperware made homes Lori's house could be the ad. No offense to Tupperware. I know it's BEC and a matter of personal preference but I really thought she would have better taste. I have a friend who doesn't like knick knacks and has a home as similarly sparse as Lori's. The difference is that her home is elegant and restrained with lots of warm colors. 

That’s Lori’s problem. She’s the opposite of elegant, restrained, and warm. Big difference, indeed.

Maybe her life is as empty and fake as the home video, and she’s suffering that bane of the “christian” existence: bitterness.

Yup. The more I consider, the more bitter Lori appears. If she wanted a biblical name for herself, she could change her name to Mara.

[EowynW]

She has to delete her own comment.

[Frog99]

Her video doesn’t provide any sort of instruction. Her home looks so cold and bare with zero character or personality. I am not a fan of clutter or a lot of nick nacks but hers is empty. And she used to watch Erin’s kids every week- one small basket of toys?? My mom had a whole toy area for my kids and often added to it so they would have something to play with. That’s not the master bathroom- the toilet placement isn’t the same as her “instructional” video. And no shower stall where ken squeegees the walls, and no garden tub. 

I rarely make my bed and don’t make the kids do it either. I get why it’s important but whatever. I would rather sleep for a few more minutes. 

Per Alyssa’s instastories, she has had those kids a bit recently. Perhaps there is trouble in Lori’s world? 

[feministxtian]

I just watched the video of Lori's "cleaning". What a cold and sterile house. My shitty apartment has more character than her McMansion. Just about everything on the walls has a story behind it, By the front door is a mirror that I bought for my aunt for her birthday about 20 years ago. She loved it because I gave it to her. When she went into the nursing home, I took the mirror home with me. In my kitchen are some little cast-iron trivets that my mom had in her kitchen when I was a kid. In the living room is a painting that a friend of my mother's did for her that I kept. Every single thing in our curios has a story behind it, my grandmother's Hummels and coffee cups, and the glasses my parents toasted their wedding with (that we used too). My house is clean enough to live in and messy enough to look lived in. 

[Loveday]

Lori would recoil in horror at my house. It's pretty much frozen in the 1980s as far as kitchen and bathrooms are concerned, and not much later in the rest of the house. And I love having lots of stuff around. Not a hoarder, but a collector, and I like to display my finds. As well, I have books EVERYWHERE. But I keep my house clean and fairly organised, and no one has complained about it or peered in the windows and then written disparaging blog posts about it. Not that I know of, at any rate. 

[freealljs]

My routine is to clean my kitchen before heading to bed.  My kitchen still has more personality than hers.  My kitchen has a French provincial theme.  Her entire house is theme-less,  bland, dull, a lot like Lori.  No clutter does not mean that things are perfect and clean.  No pops of color there.  No art from her grandkids.  No idea that she has a husband from that video.  That may well be the master bedroom that she showed.   I can see why they have no happy sex life. (brain bleach please)

All I could think of when I saw that video was that her maid must have just come by and she wanted to show off.  

And about the weight shaming:  bitch needs to cut that out. 

Also want to add that bed is not perfectly made IMO.  

[delphinium65]

11 hours ago, quiversR4hunting said:

By her deleting her comment/thread on Matt Walsh f/b, won't her readers be confused over her blog post about the comments when they can't find her comment and the "persecution" comments?

 

I should have done a screenshot, but there was a comment telling her that she is not being persecuted for her faith, but for being...well, it was stated more politely than being a cold, hypocritical bitch, but that's pretty much what it was.  She was told to to compare her Amazon ratings to Debi Pearl, that as bad as Debi is her books still rate higher than Lori's piece of crap, that it's not (just) the message, it's her. 

[Loveday]

@delphinium65, I didn't screenshot* that, but I did copy it (for some reason I didn't get the name of the person who wrote it, though). And then I got interrupted by Real Life and forgot all about it til just now reading your comment. Here it is! 

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Lori, you aren't being persecuted for your faith. Look at Amazon reviews of books like Created to Be His Helpmeet, then look at your reviews. Debi is saying very nearly the same things you say, but she's not as hypocritical and uncaring as you are. She doesn't tell women to dress modestly, then wear deep necklines and very short shorts/skirts. She doesn't delete suicide hotline numbers, or tell women half the crap you do. As repellant as her message is sometimes, she appears to be living it, unlike you. So just get over yourself, and accept that it's not your message, it's you.

 

*screenshoot? I don't know which word is correct in that sentence! 

[delphinium65]

6 minutes ago, Loveday said:

@delphinium65, I didn't screenshot* that, but I did copy it (for some reason I didn't get the name of the person who wrote it, though). And then I got interrupted by Real Life and forgot all about it til just now reading your comment. Here it is! 

 

*screenshoot? I don't know which word is correct in that sentence! 

I'm glad someone got it, because I didn't have time when I saw it.  I dunno, is screenshoot a real word? My spellchecker is doing the wiggly red line thing under it...but if it isn't, it really should be!  

[Free Jana Duggar]

So this morning was on waiting for sex until marriage. I'm good with that. It is the way God intended.

We didn't actually make it until the wedding night, but we were engaged, and it was nice to know I wouldn't be compared to anyone else or have to worry about STD's.  

That being said, I don't like how the fundies make virginity out to be the end all be all of a woman's worth like she is damaged goods if she isn't a virgin on her wedding day. 

I wasn't some "ho". My husband is the only man I've ever been with.

 

ETA: Not calling anyone who has had more than one partner a ho. Sorry if that came across wrong.  

[AlwaysDiscerning]

I got that shot. It was the last one before it was all deleted. Looking at it now, I bet this is really what threw Lori over the edge. The thought that Debi Pearl is better than her. 

 

[Red Hair, Black Dress]

I'm going to out myself as a 'ho here:  Mr. Dress was not my first; I wasn't his. Not that we slept around but there were a few (very few) people for each other before we met.  College/ early 20s romances dontcha ya know, Plus we were out of college and had been working for some years when we met.

That said. I have never once since we got together compared him to anyone else.  As a matter of fact, those other sexual  experiences melted from my memory so I have no specifics to remember. Mr. Dress is it for me, the be all and end all.  To me he is incomparable. No one else would ever come close so why on earth would I compare him to anyone. 

And I'm just going to mention that no parent can ever be 100% absolutely guaranteed sure that all their children are virgins when they marry.

"Clean" video: Oh gee Lori, advice to keep your bathroom clean and clean the kitchen.  Wow I would never have known to do that if you didn't mention it.

Lori's house is so cold and sterile.  I've been in motels that have more warmth and personality than her bedroom.  That bed is not perfectly made,  whatever that means.  Also her entire color scheme is brown and beige -- boring and depressing.  I also noticed she does not have a living room rug.  What happen to that brown Wonder Rug(TM) she touted that never, ever needed to be vacuumed?

Her house looks as if no one lives there -- or rather no one who is happy. I didn't see anything personal there, no photos, art work, nothing. The house also seemed dark to me, (although that could be the video). Plus her fancy new kitchen is nothing to write home about.  From the way she raved about it I was expecting much more.  The house seems like a perfect example of late 1980s upper middle class tract housing in a nice subdivision. And I say this because the house design and Lori's "decor" seem stuck in that time period as well.  That triangular island with the stove cook top is a very bad kitchen design from the builder. I'd hit that point all the time if it was my kitchen.

[TeddyBonkers]

*I'm going to be wretchedly indiscreet, so avert thine eyes, if you feel so inclined*

I wasn't a virgin when I got married, and furthermore, I don't know if Mr. Bonkers was or not. But like @Red Hair, Black Dress, after we got together, that was it for us. There's no comparison to other men (and it's not because my memory is atrocious). It's because we actually take the time to enjoy each other in bed. No "10 minutes and lube", unless we only have time for a quickie.

My house is clean but lived in. I've got STUFF in my house. Beer steins from Germany, framed finger paintings the Bonker kids did years ago, a piece of wire from the DMZ in Korea, an American flag that was flown over a forward operating base in Afghanistan. Enjoy your cleanliness, Lori. So clean you swept all the love out of your house.

[Carol]

I was a happy ho in my youth.  It was no ones business who I slept with.  I broke a few hearts and had my heart broken, too.  It's my life, it's my body and I take responsibility for every decision I made.

[Botkinetti]

I had sexual partners before my husband and don’t regret them.

It drives me insane when virginity is considered the main component of worth for a woman. We are more than our sexual status. We are our brains, our senses of humour and compassion towards others and so many other things. We are whole human beings regardless of our virginity.

[Sarah92]

I personally believe in saving sex before marriage. Part of it beliefs, the other part is personality and how I connect with others. But I understand not everyone does believe in saving sex before marriage. I only hope that people practice safe sex as I don't believe an STD is worth a moment of pleasure. Hence why I support sex ed over abstinence classes .

However, I HATE when people compare women to broken flowers, scratched pearls, used cars, used gum if they've had sex before marriage. Women are not objects and their value doesn't decrease. Seen it way too much in purity culture and guys don't seem to get this same treatment. 

 

[Lgirlrocks]

I always planned on saving myself until marriage until I didn’t. It was something that happened. I don’t have regrets. I am not my boyfriends first and he is not mine. He’s the person I plan on spending my life with. We don’t compare ourselves to other people. 

[polecat]

6 hours ago, Loveday said:

Lori would recoil in horror at my house. It's pretty much frozen in the 1980s as far as kitchen and bathrooms are concerned, and not much later in the rest of the house. And I love having lots of stuff around. Not a hoarder, but a collector, and I like to display my finds. As well, I have books EVERYWHERE. But I keep my house clean and fairly organised, and no one has complained about it or peered in the windows and then written disparaging blog posts about it. Not that I know of, at any rate. 

She'd hate mine, too. I have a ridiculous collection of books (bookshelves in every single bedroom, several in the living room, and converted the wetbar into more bookshelves, lol). Plus, we're redecorating in a style that my husband calls Willy Wonka Went to the Circus. So. Much. Color. No. Cares. Given.

Lori'd have to blog herself silly over how God would HATE it. Because reasons.

[Koala]

I tend to think that the stunningly stark room in the video belongs to Lori.  She has mentioned a couple of times that she and Ken often sleep separately. 

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One reader asked me if I thought it was okay for married people to sleep in separate bedrooms. I told her I didn't see a problem with it as long as they had a healthy sex life and marriage.

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When all of our bedrooms were occupied with children, I would sleep on the sofa in the family room when I was real sick or in pain. I like to be alone in those cases.

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 I sleep in another bedroom on occasion. When my neck flares up and I have a very hard time sleeping, I need a room to myself. When Ken gets up early for a business trip and I don't want to be awakened at 4:00 a.m., I will sleep in another bedroom.

So when she's sick/her neck flairs up/or Ken travels.  Sounds like a pretty good bit, and I know she's mentioned it at least once before.

Honestly, whatever works for them.  My husband and I recently redecorated our bedroom.  In the process, we downsized from a king to a queen bed, in favor of having more space.  Honestly, we are snugglers, so we could have probably done with a twin and still had room.  We can't sleep unless we're beside each other.

That said, THAT ROOM!  Ughh.  Our house was built in the early fifties, so when I redecorated, I hit up a couple of antique stores for furniture and decor.  I HATE clutter and I'm kind of a clean freak, but a cheerful room makes me happy.  I am honestly so tempted to post pics to show Lori just how much you can do and still stay within a very reasonable budget.  She needs some color, and a set of end tables!  And lamps!  But definitely end tables.

The older I get, the more I require by my bed.  Hot flashes?  Glass of water.  Dry skin?  Lotion / Chapstick.  Eyes?  Contact solution and case/ eye drops.  Then there's my medication, cell phone, husband's cell, and on and on.  During the day I put it all in a drawer, but at night I like to have it where I can reach it.  Where does the woman put her glasses?? 

The whole thing is just...joyless.  The whole house really.  And that pitiful basket of toys?  Nope, nope, nope.  They must get so bored with the same things each visit.  When I have grandbabies, I am doing a whole room just for them.  I want a play kitchen, a dress up box, some legos, puzzles, books, an art station...the whole nine yards.  Then I am going to paint the works a cheerful shade of yellow.  No boring wicker basket, thank you very much.  Kids don't need tons of toys, but what Lori is offering up is downright pitiful.    

[polecat]

2 hours ago, Carol said:

I was a happy ho in my youth.  It was no ones business who I slept with.  I broke a few hearts and had my heart broken, too.  It's my life, it's my body and I take responsibility for every decision I made.

Happy ho here, too, and no regrets. Husband wasn't a virgin. Whatever. We certainly don't compare one another to past lovers. That's a damned odd thing for someone to do  ... I can't imagine anyone does that.