Dillards 52: Making Life Look Complicated

[SPHASH]

The Tuttle Twin books sound just as awful as Sarah Maxwell's Moody books.

[TatiFish9]

6 minutes ago, Ivycoveredtower said:

I think if Jana has any one "Baby" it would be Jackson she has always seemed to have a super strong attachment to him and him to her. I think if/when Jana leaves he will be the one most effected 

Yes, I think maybe strong attachment to Jackson and strong responsibility for Josie. 

Although, after Michelle accepted she would no longer get pregnant it seems like she started zoning in on the youngest girls like she had the oldest. That probably gave her more time with Josie than Jana with Josie.

Now that Joy is gone is her teamed transferred to one of the twin boys? Or all the young girls Michelle's buddies?

Are the middle few left to fend for themselves. It's confusing.

 

 

 

 

[Queen]

21 hours ago, Ivycoveredtower said:

I talked about this in another thread can't remember which but in 16 kids and moving in at about the 4:30 mark Jim Bob says that he's always left if they have more kids up to Michelle I found that a bit shocking when I re watched it recently as it wasn't their parroted up to God answer. 

And if he'd really cared for her, he would have stopped the baby train sooner, seeing how it affected her health. It takes two to tango... (or mini golf humping )

[Ivycoveredtower]

1 minute ago, TatiFish9 said:

Yes, I think maybe strong attachment to Jackson and strong responsibility for Josie. 

Although, after Michelle accepted she would no longer get pregnant it seems like she started zoning in on the youngest girls like she had the oldest. That probably gave her more time with Josie than Jana with Josie.

Now that Joy is gone is her teamed transferred to one of the twin boys? Or all the young girls Michelle's buddies?

Are the middle few left to fend for themselves. It's confusing.

 

 

 

 

 I think the rest are just left to themselves  with the exception of Josie sometimes look at how they dress from Hannie down it always seems a rag tag of an outfit. I just don't think anyone cares anymore Jana probably does what she can and I think Jordyn probably cheers every time mommy Jessa shows up.  

[Cleopatra7]

1 hour ago, TatiFish9 said:

The only name I know on the list you provided is Stanley. I can assure you there are very little to no message boards, tumblrs, FB pages, articles and tv specials collected and consumed en masse by religious (and secular) alike for the names you listed. 

There’s a difference between being a name on the Internet and having actual real world influence. Oftentimes, the most influential people are not the most famous and recognizable ones but the ones who stay out of the limelight. For example, if asked, most people would list the Kennedy family or the Bushes as “American royalty” because of how famous they are. But the Lodge and Cabot families are much more powerful and you never hear about them by design. Like I said, the Duggars were always a freak show, and everyone seems to understand that but them. They had a chance to actually have some real sort with Josh at the FRC and he blew it, although it’s questionable how much room there would have been for him to climb the corporate ladder given how unqualified he was for his job. Billy Graham was never a major topic on social media (except maybe for his death) but no one would deny the level of his influence.

[Ivycoveredtower]

4 minutes ago, Queen said:

And if he'd really cared for her, he would have stopped the baby train sooner, seeing how it affected her health. It takes two to tango... (or mini golf humping )

Jim bob liked sex to much and Michelle wasn't going to use BC so 19 kids it was.

[mizandry]

I said I'd stop because I was getting carried away, but I'm worldly so I lied:

Spoiler

Carry on... 

[TatiFish9]

@Ivycoveredtower 

I haven't seen the new season but last one Johanna seemed so programmed. Sadly they have gotten to her. Poor Jenni is next. Sigh... And it just keeps going. It will be interesting to see the dynamic once Josiah goes. 

Also, has it ever been made clear if John David actually lives at the house? I had always envisioned him with a hush apartment while Jana continued to live at home.

5 minutes ago, Cleopatra7 said:

There’s a difference between being a name on the Internet and having actual real world influence. Oftentimes, the most influential people are not the most famous and recognizable ones but the ones who stay out of the limelight. For example, if asked, most people would list the Kennedy family or the Bushes as “American royalty” because of how famous they are. But the Lodge and Cabot families are much more powerful and you never hear about them by design. Like I said, the Duggars were always a freak show, and everyone seems to understand that but them. They had a chance to actually have some real sort with Josh at the FRC and he blew it, although it’s questionable how much room there would have been for him to climb the corporate ladder given how unqualified he was for his job. Billy Graham was never a major topic on social media (except maybe for his death) but no one would deny the level of his influence.

Okay, but this is not even remotely close to the point I was making. At all. In anyway.  So, I don't have an argument against what you're saying here.

[Ivycoveredtower]

2 minutes ago, TatiFish9 said:

@Ivycoveredtower 

I haven't seen the new season but last one Johanna seemed so programmed. Sadly they have gotten to her. Poor Jenni is next. Sigh... And it just keeps going. It will be interesting to see the dynamic once Josiah goes. 

Also, has it ever been made clear if John David actually lives at the house? I had always envisioned him with a hush apartment while Jana continued to live at home.

that has never been made clear we don't really see him around much only in a few interviews and he didn't go on their last trip with them spending his birthday at Joy and Austin's house instead. 

[KelseyAnn]

57 minutes ago, TatiFish9 said:

Do you all think Jill sees Joy and other buddies as her actual children? We often talk about the impact sibling raising has on the younger child, rarely the older ones. I find it interesting that Jill continues to call Joy her buddy and said Gideon was the newest member of the buddy team.

 

 

My older sister raised me and my younger sister since we were really little, and even now it's hard for her to accept that we're grown adults making our own decision. She was so used to mothering us, it's hard for her to get into the 'sister' role and want to do sisterly activities. 

[TatiFish9]

@Queen I think they both wanted the kids especially once their fertility landed them fame. However, I think Jim Bob's point was if Michelle wanted to stop he would have been okay with her decision.

@Ivycoveredtower I can't not imagine him living in that room with the younger boys, still. lol A Bachelor 'Til the Rapture needs his own pad. 

[mollysmom]

1 hour ago, Ivycoveredtower said:

pretty sure a peice of cheese is just what a fed up Jana just ended up giving her after she had to follow Jordyn all over the Kitchen and through the pantry. 

That's right! Yes!

[Pretzel]

@luv2laugh That doesn't look like James in the picture. It looks like Jason, or Justin. Jill's buddy team was Joy, James, and Jenni. I am not even sure the baby on Jill's arms is Jenni. 

I am sure though that Joy is more attached to Jill than she ever was to Michelle. Jill herself said Joy was her 'real life baby doll' (sic) in her wedding dress episode and I seem to remember it made Joy cry so much she couldn't get the words out. 

One can say about Jill whatever they want, but she's been mothering Joy (and James and Jenni) all these years and I'd not be surprised if Giddy started to call her Grandma Jill. 

[TheMustardCardigan]

Checking out the web site for those books now. Man, who would've ever thought that just reading your kid Cat in the Hat and Sesame Street books was secretly spoonfeeding them "the librull agenda!"

[Glasgowghirl]

Those story books sound horrible on many levels, I'm all for teaching kids morals and values, most stories do that in one way or another but these ones are extreme. 

[anjulibai]

3 hours ago, cptbailey said:

 

 

Do these assholes ever ask themselves just why social welfare programs exist? Or do they think they were created in a vacuum just to mess with people and push them down? 

[SassyPants]

2 hours ago, luv2laugh said:

Sometimes I wonder if Jill really struggled emotionally being in CA because she was separated from her buddy team. 

I was looking at old videos and Michelle did NOT raise those kids. She ONLY raised the first 6 with Grandma Duggar’s help... Jana and Jill did MOST of the parenting, Jessa did the homeschooling & chores, and Jinger was solely a laundry & kitchen worker.  

I think the kids view Michelle as a grandmother figure and Jana as Mom. Michelle flies all over vacationing with JB and giving talks. The kids do not miss her. 

Jana has probably suffered watching buddy teams cope with Jill and others leaving and feels she can’t. 

I wonder how Jana REALLY feels about Michelle!

Included is Jill’s Buddy Team photo for emphasis. It clearly demonstrates the dynamic she had with Joy, visually....

The Beige Bottomed Buddy Team!

1 hour ago, Pretzel said:

@luv2laugh That doesn't look like James in the picture. It looks like Jason, or Justin. Jill's buddy team was Joy, James, and Jenni. I am not even sure the baby on Jill's arms is Jenni. 

I am sure though that Joy is more attached to Jill than she ever was to Michelle. Jill herself said Joy was her 'real life baby doll' (sic) in her wedding dress episode and I seem to remember it made Joy cry so much she couldn't get the words out. 

One can say about Jill whatever they want, but she's been mothering Joy (and James and Jenni) all these years and I'd not be surprised if Giddy started to call her Grandma Jill. 

Which makes her initial responses to mothering Izzy and Sammy so surprising- it's like she had never been with any babies at all. Maybe Michelle was hands-on for the infants?

[KelseyAnn]

6 minutes ago, SassyPants said:

The Beige Bottomed Buddy Team!

Which makes her initial responses to mothering Izzy and Sammy so surprising- it's like she had never been with any babies at all. Maybe Michelle was hands-on for the infants?

Maybe she's 'mothered' out. 

[Daisy0322]

4 hours ago, EmCatlyn said:

Two year olds just like to be read to.  If there are pictures and the reader makes his/her voice interesting, that is all that you need.  I have read to multi-age groups, and the little ones will “listen” to stuff they don’t understand if you just get them engaged with the pictures.  

I second this, I read all kinds of books to my 6 month old. Dr Seuss, rainbow fish, etc. he loves it as long as I use fun voices and let him try to turn the pages.

[Pretzel]

@SassyPants What @KelseyAnn said. I think she's mothered out and exhausted. It's like having a child in your 20s and having one in your 40s. You gotta start over again.

[anjulibai]

 

9 minutes ago, SassyPants said:

The Beige Bottomed Buddy Team!

Which makes her initial responses to mothering Izzy and Sammy so surprising- it's like she had never been with any babies at all. Maybe Michelle was hands-on for the infants?

My mother, third of 9 kids, changed her first diaper at 5. She definitely did the sister-mom thing to her siblings - not so bad as the Duggars and with mainly the last two who were born in her teens, but definitely more than should have been.

When she had me she expected that everything would be easy and she'd know exactly how to react to everything, because she'd done it all before with her siblings and a couple of nieces. 

Nope, it was totally different for her with her own child. She was terrified of doing something wrong or of dropping me or of hurting me somehow. Didn't help of course that my birth was difficult (36 hour labor, prepped for C-section twice, meds wore off really quickly) and that her milk came in bad so I was starving and thus colicky. 

I think Jill experienced something similar. Only, my mom had her mother around that could actually help with me and give my mom a break, and my dad wasn't useless, despite never having taken care of a baby, and actually helped out quite a bit. And there wasn't a ton of pressure on my mom to be perfect and godly and a paragon of motherhood. Jill had that pressure and when it didn't go perfect, it made being a mother that much harder on her. 

[Daisy0322]

1 minute ago, KelseyAnn said:

Maybe she's 'mothered' out. 

Do we know if the j slaves had to get up at night with littlest or be mainly responsible for them when they're sick, hurt, or other high needs situations. I mean even if they were "little moms" then they might still get breaks. Being the "head mom" is 24/7 especially if you don't have any buddy team system. You think about your babies all the time even when your not with them. I think it's more mentally and emotionally  taxing than people expect. Being a little sister mom is just mostly physically demanding since they're mainly following orders.

[Toomuchtimeonmyhands]

6 minutes ago, anjulibai said:

 

Nope, it was totally different for her with her own child.

I agree!  I babysat so much, I though motherhood would be a breeze! I was shocked how different it was to be the "final say" for my own babies.

 

[KelseyAnn]

36 minutes ago, Daisy0322 said:

Do we know if the j slaves had to get up at night with littlest or be mainly responsible for them when they're sick, hurt, or other high needs situations. I mean even if they were "little moms" then they might still get breaks. Being the "head mom" is 24/7 especially if you don't have any buddy team system. You think about your babies all the time even when your not with them. I think it's more mentally and emotionally  taxing than people expect. Being a little sister mom is just mostly physically demanding since they're mainly following orders.

Don't Boob and Mechelle lock their door at night? How would the littles get to them if they needed help? I have no doubt at all that sister-moming was a full-time job for the oldest four girls. If Michelle can't even be bothered to take her kids to their appointments, what makes you think she was up with them during a nightmare or while sick? 

[VelociRapture]

38 minutes ago, Daisy0322 said:

Do we know if the j slaves had to get up at night with littlest or be mainly responsible for them when they're sick, hurt, or other high needs situations. I mean even if they were "little moms" then they might still get breaks. Being the "head mom" is 24/7 especially if you don't have any buddy team system. You think about your babies all the time even when your not with them. I think it's more mentally and emotionally  taxing than people expect. Being a little sister mom is just mostly physically demanding since they're mainly following orders.

As far as I remember, the babies were transferred to their buddy teams at around six months old. I believe that meant they were sleeping in the girls’ dorm - which, of course, means the buddy leaders were most likely the ones getting up at night with them. 

I was 28 when my daughter was born and I spent the first few months pretty exhausted, even though she was a really good sleeper. I can’t even imagine how tired those poor girls must have been taking care of those babies. Jill was just six when she got her first buddy - if she was actually fully responsible for Joy at that age then that’s just ridiculous. Children need their rest and they need to be allowed time to just be children. 

(Again, I believe six months was when they were moved. I’m not positive though, so someone please correct me if I’m wrong.)

2 hours ago, Pretzel said:

@luv2laugh That doesn't look like James in the picture. It looks like Jason, or Justin. Jill's buddy team was Joy, James, and Jenni. I am not even sure the baby on Jill's arms is Jenni. 

I am sure though that Joy is more attached to Jill than she ever was to Michelle. Jill herself said Joy was her 'real life baby doll' (sic) in her wedding dress episode and I seem to remember it made Joy cry so much she couldn't get the words out. 

One can say about Jill whatever they want, but she's been mothering Joy (and James and Jenni) all these years and I'd not be surprised if Giddy started to call her Grandma Jill. 

If this website is correct then James wasn’t originally on Jill’s team. Her team was Joy, Justin, and Jenni:

http://www.duggarfamilyblog.com/2016/07/celebrating-with-jason.html?m=1

So if that’s correct, Justin was switched to Jessa’s team and James was added to Jill’s sometime after the buddy group photos were taken in 2010.