Joy & Austin 21: Still Talking About Baby Gideon

[Denim Jumper]

I was a very strict ovo-vegetarian for just shy of 30 years... until this past summer. We were at a cookout with some new friends and the guys were cooking up these burgers stuffed with bacon. The host handed me one (I never advertised being veg, and my husband was watching in amusement because he knows I’m too polite to refuse it, but there was no where to discretely dispose of it. So, I took a small bite, figuring I could spit it into a napkin when no one was looking. But it was so fucking delicious that I couldn’t spit it out.

[SapphireSlytherin]

So, @Denim Jumper— did you eat the whole thing? Because it sounds delicious.

[Denim Jumper]

50 minutes ago, SapphireSlytherin said:

So, @Denim Jumper— did you eat the whole thing? Because it sounds delicious.

Yes. And then washed it down with a hot dog, lol

[SapphireSlytherin]

Bacon is the gateway meat.

[Jellybean]

Yes, it really is (in the UK, at least). Friends of mine didn’t change their surnames when they married, but they gave their child a different surname; a combination of both parents’ names. 

My brother and his wife combined their surnames when they married - my brother changed his name by deed poll before the wedding and his wife then took ‘his’ name. There’s a charge for the deed poll, but it’s free to change one person’s name after a marriage. 

I understand the feeling of not wanting to be connected to one’s family of origin @mollysmom, and I’m sorry to hear that you feel that way. I hope that you can find peace, whatever name is attached to that.

[SassyPants]

4 hours ago, mollysmom said:

I'm recently divorced and still have my husbands name only because I absolutely do NOT want my maiden name back!! I don't want any reminder of those people. I was wondering if I can just change my last name to something else? Something random. Is that really allowed?

Yes, @ least in the US.

I worked with a person who changed her last name numerous times-

[QuiverFullofBooks]

1 hour ago, SassyPants said:

Yes, @ least in the US.

I worked with a person who changed her last name numerous times-

Remember when Phoebe on Friends got married and changed her name? She had all the paperwork and the clerk said don’t worry about it, in New York City you can change your name to anything anytime for any reason. She said “Ooh, I’ll have to think about that!” and spent the rest of the episode thinking up silly names.

[AnnEggBlandHer?]

1 hour ago, QuiverFullofBooks said:

Remember when Phoebe on Friends got married and changed her name? She had all the paperwork and the clerk said don’t worry about it, in New York City you can change your name to anything anytime for any reason. She said “Ooh, I’ll have to think about that!” and spent the rest of the episode thinking up silly names.

Princess Consuela Bananahammock, if I recall correctly? 

[Glasgowghirl]

4 hours ago, AnnEggBlandHer? said:

Princess Consuela Bananahammock, if I recall correctly? 

Yes, and Mike decided he would be Crap Bag.

[mollysmom]

4 hours ago, AnnEggBlandHer? said:

Princess Consuela Bananahammock, if I recall correctly? 

Haha yup!! And her husband was going to change his to "crap bag" lol

 

1 minute ago, Glasgowghirl said:

Yes, and Mike decided he would be Crap Bag.

Lol sorry....just saw that you posted that right before me!

[VBOY9977]

So TLC released a short 2 part episode on Gideon’s birth. It’s exclusively on TLC go. I think it’s what they did with Joe and Kendra’s wedding before they released longer episodes for TV. 

I haven’t watched but from tumblr recaps she labored at home for 20 hours before the midwife determined the baby was breach. She went to the hospital and had a c-section.

[Ivycoveredtower]

1 minute ago, VBOY9977 said:

So TLC released a short 2 part episode on Gideon’s birth. It’s exclusively on TLC go. I think it’s what they did with Joe and Kendra’s wedding before they released longer episodes for TV. 

I haven’t watched but from tumblr recaps she labored at home for 20 hours before the midwife determined the baby was breach. She went to the hospital and had a c-section.

So thtat's 3 duggar daughter c-sections and only Jessa having a vaginal birth. at lest from what you wrote she seemed to have a competent midwife which is good. 

[VineHeart137]

1 minute ago, VBOY9977 said:

So TLC released a short 2 part episode on Gideon’s birth. It’s exclusively on TLC go. I think it’s what they did with Joe and Kendra’s wedding before they released longer episodes for TV. 

I haven’t watched but from tumblr recaps she labored at home for 20 hours before the midwife determined the baby was breach. She went to the hospital and had a c-section.

Without watching it myself, it sounds like she had a relatively competent midwife and didn't necessarily endanger her child's life. Good for her. She seemed to have been released from the hospital fairly quickly considering it was a c-section so that's good too. Glad they both pulled through safely.

[VBOY9977]

4 minutes ago, Ivycoveredtower said:

So thtat's 3 duggar daughter c-sections and only Jessa having a vaginal birth. at lest from what you wrote she seemed to have a competent midwife which is good. 

Only 2 Duggar daughters though but yeah, apparently she did have a midwife but Jill was also there taking vitals

[justoneoftwo]

Who was the midwife?  

How hard is it to know if the baby is breach?  

[Rachel333]

It's interesting that every Duggar daughter so far has ended up needing to go to the hospital for her first birth. Of 5 attempted home births, only 1 has actually gone to plan without extra medical intervention required.

Just now, VBOY9977 said:

Only 2 Duggar daughters though but yeah, apparently she did have a midwife but Jill was also there taking vitals

2 daughters have had 3 C-sections between the two of them. The numbers threw me off at first too.

And even Jessa, who hasn't needed C-sections, could have died from her first birth if she hadn't gone to the hospital.

[Ivycoveredtower]

3 minutes ago, VBOY9977 said:

Only 2 Duggar daughters though but yeah, apparently she did have a midwife but Jill was also there taking vitals

yeah I was counting both of Jill's births in that count. hopefully Jinger has a birth more like Jessa's with Henry.

[singsingsing]

I wonder if they'll start to reconsider home births now. Or at least more competent prenatal care.* It's entirely possible/likely that Izzy, Sam, and Gideon would've had to have been born by C-section no matter what, but sometimes proper medical care can catch/address things and improve the chances of a vaginal delivery. Also, they've gotten lucky so far. They're rolling the dice every time they eschew proper prenatal care and attempt a home birth with a lay midwife. 

*I know we don't know for sure what kind of prenatal care they get, but all signs point to questionable lay midwifery with maybe an ultrasound or two from a boutique place just to find out the sex. With their history of huge babies and birth complications, this worries me.

[Crazy Enough to Join]

Wow, well Joy may not be getting her 20 babies. It is odd how horribly all the births are going. I don't think it's right to blame it on lack of prenatal care. Childbirth is complicated and scary. Midwives usually have better luck avoiding c-sections, not worse.

[justoneoftwo]

1 minute ago, Crazy Enough to Join said:

Wow, well Joy may not be getting her 20 babies. It is odd how horribly all the births are going. I don't think it's right to blame it on lack of prenatal care. Childbirth is complicated and scary. Midwives usually have better luck avoiding c-sections, not worse.

There is likely some common reason.  Also Midwives are better at avoiding c-sections because they turn down patients as they turn out to be likely to have them.  So if you have no high risk patients your results will be better.  

[Brickiebaby]

Wow, good thing the midwife sent her to the hospital! A breech baby of his size would not have good chances of a vaginal birth without severe complications and risk of getting stuck. 

[JermajestyDuggar]

I have no idea if this is a thing but maybe genetics are involved? My mom, sister, and I all had vaginal deliveries without any problems. And all babies were 8 and 9+ pounds at the hospital. We joke that we have birthing hips but that's a joke. We don't really think that's a thing. 

[justoneoftwo]

Just now, JermajestyDuggar said:

I have no idea if this is a thing but maybe genetics are involved? My mom, sister, and I all had vaginal deliveries without any problems. And all babies were 8 and 9+ pounds at the hospital. We joke that we have birthing hips but that's a joke. We don't really think that's a thing. 

My mom says similar things.  When I was worried about recovery she told me we come from "peasant stock" and would be up in no time.  I was, my sister was (with twins) and in the 80s my mom was back to work in 3 days.

[singsingsing]

9 minutes ago, Crazy Enough to Join said:

Wow, well Joy may not be getting her 20 babies. It is odd how horribly all the births are going. I don't think it's right to blame it on lack of prenatal care. Childbirth is complicated and scary. Midwives usually have better luck avoiding c-sections, not worse.

I would say that competent midwives might have a better track record of avoiding C-sections, and like @justoneoftwo mentioned, it's often because they're not taking higher risk patients as clients. If the Duggar daughters aren't getting competent prenatal care from competent medical practitioners (and again, we don't know this for sure), then they're putting themselves at higher risk for complications, including C-sections. 

[bananabread]

I couldn't care less about whether a child is born "naturally" or by c-section, but I do find myself worried about the home birthing trend. I know the whole "only the bad stories make the news" argument, but I have heard of way too many unsuccessful/dangerous home births for my taste. And even if it ends in a healthy mom and baby, I don't understand the appeal of laboring for days in excruciating pain while hoping something disastrous doesn't happen. I just watched Maddie's home birth on Sister Wives, and omg. The girl was in labor for like 4 days and was vomiting and delirious from pain in the bathtub. I have never been so confident in my decision to have a epidurals one day.

I know that plenty of women have nice home births, but a first time mother? With a clearly enormous baby?? And a family history of difficult births???? That would scare the hell out of me. Even Michelle needed serious interventions with her first few births...Josh's birth required forceps, and Jana/John David were a c-section. The Duggar girls just don't have good home birth potential. I hope Jinger breaks the trend.