Jill, Derick, Israel and the Shower Rack- Part 21

[JesSky03]

Hopefully any kid who still believes in Santa is too young for twitter but still what a dick move. My husband and I likely won't do Santa with our own future kids but I would never ruin it for anyone else. It's a personal choice- do whatever you feel is right for your family. You can still  have the magic of Christmas without Santa. You can still give and receive gifts without Santa. You can still watch Christmas movies about Santa and still not "do" Santa. On the flip side you can do all those things with Santa. Or with Santa AND Jesus. Or not do either at all. There is not right or wrong way so live and let live and not spoil any of the magic of Christmas for anyone else regardless of how or why they celebrate. 

[Screamapillar]

It must be exhausting to be so joyless and self-righteous! I will never understand why these people who have such a stick up their butt about Jesus have to try to ruin the fun for everyone else. Jesus and Santa can coexist, it's not a big deal. I guess it is for someone who spends their life dicking around in developing countries handing out tracts and candy seemingly for the sole purpose of inflating their own ego. Maybe if Derick got a real job again he wouldn't have time to be such a Grinch. 

[Mela99]

My mothers family - devout, immigrant, old world Italian Roman Catholics - fully shipped Santa and tried to keep it up as long as they could, believing that any way they could keep us involved with Christmas and church and holiday joy was worth it. My grandmother said something to the effect of Santa being an homage to the three wise men who wanted to honor baby Jesus and share love and generosity with everyone. Being Italian we also heard about Befana, the witch. The wise men came to her door asking for directions so they could celebrate Jesus and she sent them away. She felt guilty for the rest of her life and spent it leaving gifts for children in the hopes that one of them would reach baby Jesus. And uh ... Saint Nicholas WAS a legitimate, real human being who spent his life telling children about Christ. It doesn't have to be Santa OR Jesus. They don't cancel each other out.

[CoveredInBees]

Bah Humbug to you Mr Dillard.

I hope Santa brings you coal.

[manda b]

Derek stop being a douchebag.

[Pasta]

UPTV tweeted something about santa. I was so inclined to tag dill dick. 

 

[karen77]

4 hours ago, outtheblue said:

He's such an ass...Santa was a big no-no in my evangelical Christian house because in my church's view he was the world's replacement for Jesus. We still participated in all the other pagan-Christian rituals so Christmas was still fun, and we didn't ruin Santa for anyone else.

we have some new uber religious neighbors that moved in this summer, first thing the 6 year old did upon hanging with m y 7 year old for an hour was bring up that Santa wasn't real, wtf. She's a weird kid too...needs some SERIOUS socializing or maybe she's just a sociopath...she gives me the creeps (not for the santa comment, other weird stuff). Luckily DD picks her last to hang with in the neighborhood.

[SassyPants]

11 hours ago, allthegoodnamesrgone said:

What amazing place do you work that allows new mothers to bring their babies to work with them?

My daughter lives in a So American country and when she was set to return to her HS teaching job after her 4 months paid maternity leave, she was allowed to work half days for the first year, and bring her baby to work.

She was working at a British International school (both she and her hubs worked at the same school).

She has since moved to the American International school where from age 2, there is free nursery school, grade and HS (earning an American diploma) for all staff members' kids.

Since this school is 15,000/yr it's a nice benefit.

[ljohnson2006]

Derick is telling kids that Santa isn't real. 

[SassyPants]

1 hour ago, Screamapillar said:

It must be exhausting to be so joyless and self-righteous! I will never understand why these people who have such a stick up their butt about Jesus have to try to ruin the fun for everyone else. Jesus and Santa can coexist, it's not a big deal. I guess it is for someone who spends their life dicking around in developing countries handing out tracts and candy seemingly for the sole purpose of inflating their own ego. Maybe if Derick got a real job again he wouldn't have time to be such a Grinch. 

As my SIL would say (only it was about her now departed mother) a real JOY SUCK.

[kunoichi66]

1 hour ago, Pasta said:

UPTV tweeted something about santa. I was so inclined to tag dill dick. 

 

That is so lovely! 

[Four is Enough]

I remember when One, then ten years old, flat out asked me if Santa was real. I asked him if he really wanted to know, and he said yes, because his school mates were telling him differing stories. So I said that Mr. Four and I did buy the gifts, but the spirit of what Santa stood for was real, because it was the spirit of giving. One flat out told me how disappointed he was that Santa wasn't real. It's been 15 years since we had that conversation, and I think of it, and his disappointment, every year.

People who try to quash that hope and joy are just ugly. Even Jesus told stories. They were called parables. Santa is a parable. It means, "be generous, be kind."

[MargaretElliott]

Have any of you guys seen that post floating around facebook? It's pretty long so I put it under a spoiler, but it warmed the cockles of my heart (whatever that means...)

Spoiler

"In our family, we have a special way of transitioning the kids from receiving from Santa, to becoming a Santa. This way, the Santa construct is not a lie that gets discovered, but an unfolding series of good deeds and Christmas spirit.

When they are 6 or 7, whenever you see that dawning suspicion that Santa may not be a material being, that means the child is ready.

I take them out "for coffee" at the local wherever. We get a booth, order our drinks, and the following pronouncement is made:
“You sure have grown an awful lot this year. Not only are you taller, but I can see that your heart has grown, too. [ Point out 2-3 examples of empathetic behavior, consideration of people's feelings, good deeds etc, the kid has done in the past year]. In fact, your heart has grown so much that I think you are ready to become a Santa Claus.

You probably have noticed that most of the Santas you see are people dressed up like him. Some of your friends might have even told you that there is no Santa. A lot of children think that, because they aren't ready to BE a Santa yet, but YOU ARE.

Tell me the best things about Santa. What does Santa get for all of his trouble? [lead the kid from "cookies" to the good feeling of having done something for someone else]. Well, now YOU are ready to do your first job as a Santa!"

Make sure you maintain the proper conspiratorial tone.
We then have the child choose someone they know--a neighbor, usually. The child's mission is to secretly, deviously, find out something that the person needs, and then provide it, wrap it, deliver it--and never reveal to the target where it came from. Being a Santa isn't about getting credit, you see. It's unselfish giving.
My oldest chose the "witch lady" on the corner. She really was horrible--had a fence around the house and would never let the kids go in and get a stray ball or Frisbee. She'd yell at them to play quieter, etc--a real pill. He noticed when we drove to school that she came out every morning to get her paper in bare feet, so he decided she needed slippers. So then he had to go spy and decide how big her feet were. He hid in the bushes one Saturday, and decided she was a medium. We went to Kmart and bought warm slippers. He wrapped them up, and tagged it "merry Christmas from Santa." After dinner one evening, he slipped down to her house, and slid the package under her driveway gate. The next morning, we watched her waddle out to get the paper, pick up the present, and go inside. My son was all excited, and couldn't wait to see what would happen next. The next morning, as we drove off, there she was, out getting her paper--wearing the slippers. He was ecstatic. I had to remind him that NO ONE could ever know what he did, or he wouldn't be a Santa.

Over the years, he chose a good number of targets, always coming up with a unique present just for them. One year, he polished up his bike, put a new seat on it, and gave it to one of our friend's daughters. These people were and are very poor. We did ask the dad if it was ok. The look on her face, when she saw the bike on the patio with a big bow on it, was almost as good as the look on my son's face.

When it came time for Son #2 to join the ranks, my oldest came along, and helped with the induction speech. They are both excellent gifters, by the way, and never felt that they had been lied to--because they were let in on the Secret of Being a Santa."

Written by Leslie Rush

Also, my favorite Christmas book/miniseries EVER is the Hogfather by Terry Pratchett. Basically, the Grim Reaper saves Christmas, renamed Hogswatch, by becoming Santa Claus, renamed the Hogfather. My favorite quote is below. Perhaps Derick would benefit from reading it.

“All right," said Susan. "I'm not stupid. You're saying humans need... fantasies to make life bearable."

REALLY? AS IF IT WAS SOME KIND OF PINK PILL? NO. HUMANS NEED FANTASY TO BE HUMAN. TO BE THE PLACE WHERE THE FALLING ANGEL MEETS THE RISING APE.

"Tooth fairies? Hogfathers? Little—"

YES. AS PRACTICE. YOU HAVE TO START OUT LEARNING TO BELIEVE THE LITTLE LIES.

"So we can believe the big ones?"

YES. JUSTICE. MERCY. DUTY. THAT SORT OF THING.

"They're not the same at all!"

YOU THINK SO? THEN TAKE THE UNIVERSE AND GRIND IT DOWN TO THE FINEST POWDER AND SIEVE IT THROUGH THE FINEST SIEVE AND THEN SHOW ME ONE ATOM OF JUSTICE, ONE MOLECULE OF MERCY. AND YET—Death waved a hand. AND YET YOU ACT AS IF THERE IS SOME IDEAL ORDER IN THE WORLD, AS IF THERE IS SOME...SOME RIGHTNESS IN THE UNIVERSE BY WHICH IT MAY BE JUDGED.

"Yes, but people have got to believe that, or what's the point—"

MY POINT EXACTLY.” 

[Mela99]

8 minutes ago, MargaretElliott said:

Have any of you guys seen that post floating around facebook? It's pretty long so I put it under a spoiler, but it warmed the cockles of my heart (whatever that means...)

  Hide contents

 

That's one of the sweetest things I've ever seen. I might save that for when MelaBabies finally make an appearance.

[Flossie]

In my family we did Christmas up in a big way.  Huge tree, decorations all over the place, and gifts from Santa under the tree on Christmas morning.  As each of us older kids found out Santa wasn't real, Mom would tell us that under no circumstances were we to reveal the truth to our younger siblings.  When the youngest child found out, Christmas morning didn't change.  There were still presents from Santa under the tree.  One year one of us called out "Thanks Mom" while opening a Santa gift.  Mom said "That's from Santa.  If you can't thank him, he won't bring you any more presents.  But he'll still bring presents to your brothers and sisters."  Message received.

All of my siblings are grown now, we've had our children, and some of us are now grandparents.  But my Mom still sends gifts to the younger kids (gift cards for the rest of us), and when the package arrives with her gifts there is another box the parents are supposed to hide and open on Christmas Eve after the kids are in bed.  Seems Santa drops his gifts off early at Mom's house, and she, as a good elf, sends them on to the little children.

My father is married to another Christmas lover.  At his house on Christmas Eve they have a party with gifts and a big buffet.  Santa always makes it to the party in full Santa uniform.  (Dad 'invites' Santa months in advance.)  Santa arrives in a car (the reindeer are at the North Pole resting up for the big trip), finds a big red velvet bag in the garage with gifts, comes in, sits by the fireplace and gives out gifts (and takes pictures with the kids).  After about an hour, he leaves.  Dad gives him a gift (a tip and a bottle of whiskey).  Santa's a jolly sort, you know?

Derrick can suck it.

[DaniLouisiana]

@MargaretElliott You are the best!!! Hogfather is mine and Kiddo's Christmas tradition while we wrap presents! I love Death of Rats-my personal favorite Prachett character!

[Fundie Bunny]

17 hours ago, AshSC said:

Well, my elementary school-aged daughter glanced at my phone while we cuddled before bedtime and saw Derick's tweet... I now have to comfort a little girl who is crying so hard that you'd think Santa died. Any tips on how to approach the "Santa is/isn't real" talk? 

Tell her he is just a mean angry person that is bitter that he got coal. Show her the grinch movie and she will understand what an asshole Dick Dillard is

14 hours ago, grandmadugger said:

Santa didn't get milk and cookies at my house. It was a bud light longneck and a nice plate of cheese and crackers. 

We don't actually do santa here, the three wise men come instead on january 6th. But they would not get milk and cookies in my home, they got a shot of rum each and water for the camels. They are going around the world in january on magic camels, the poor things needed some heat 

[candygirl200413]

I actually learned Santa wasn't real while watching the Rugrats Christmas Special, but even as a 20-something I'm still playing the whole Santa game. It makes me happy and I love the spirit it gives to others. Heck my parents still write Santa on our gifts (makes me feel young again).

 

Some people mentioned on tumblr that he could have been hacked? But I'm just thinking it's Derrick trying to be funny. Also I remember until recently-ish that the Duggars now have a Christmas tree, so I'm wondering with Jill and Derick's awkwardly decorated Christmas Tree is Jill's doing since she's still a rookie in this aspect.

[sophie10130]

We've always done a big Christmas. We would get up so early my parents had to give us a time: no earlier than 6am. And goddammit if I didn't get up at 6am every Christmas until I was 21 and moved out. We also always had the rule between the siblings: Whoever is up earliest (after 6am) HAS to wake the others up. And then we would all get up and get our stockings and someone would have to wake up Mom and Dad and they would start coffee and then we would all open up presents together. Yes, even when I was 21 and my 27 year old sister had to drive from her house to my parents' house. You better believed I texted her that morning to get her ass there PRONTO.

 

Being across the country, I definitely miss that a lot. There just is nothing like waking up on Christmas morning to find a bunch of presents under the tree with a fat, stuffed stocking hanging over the fireplace.

[SuchABlessing]

Creationism isn't real either, Derick, if we're keeping score. 

[allybug47]

21 minutes ago, sophie10130 said:

We've always done a big Christmas. We would get up so early my parents had to give us a time: no earlier than 6am. And goddammit if I didn't get up at 6am every Christmas until I was 21 and moved out. We also always had the rule between the siblings: Whoever is up earliest (after 6am) HAS to wake the others up. And then we would all get up and get our stockings and someone would have to wake up Mom and Dad and they would start coffee and then we would all open up presents together. Yes, even when I was 21 and my 27 year old sister had to drive from her house to my parents' house. You better believed I texted her that morning to get her ass there PRONTO.

 

Being across the country, I definitely miss that a lot. There just is nothing like waking up on Christmas morning to find a bunch of presents under the tree with a fat, stuffed stocking hanging over the fireplace.

This reminds me of my Christmas growing up, which continued after going off to college as well. Except we weren't allowed to go out to the tree until we heard Christmas music start playing, since that meant coffee was brewing 

[Georgiana]

In my (German-American Catholic) family, the traditions around Santa and St. Nicholas Day are a major part of our cultural heritage.  We celebrate St. Nicholas Day even now when no one "believes" in Santa.  Maybe because we know the "magic" of the holidays comes from traditions, connecting with the ones who came before you, the ones you love now, and the ones who will be the next generation.  Even now, as a witch, I STILL celebrate these things because love, family, and connecting to the past via tradition are universal.

I'm sorry that for Derick, this season boils down to some "truth" pissing contest instead of celebrating the wonderful things about life that still bring us light and warmth even in the coldest, darkest of seasons.  Must be a miserable way to live.  

[sophie10130]

I've had some other thoughts on this. Because I don't ever remember being as delighted in Jesus or God as I was in Santa or Christmas. And that's not hard to understand why.

Santa gave gifts. Christmas is a time for selflessly giving gifts and spending time with family and repeating traditions that mean something to you and yours. You give gifts to people you love and feel wonderful because you see how much they appreciate the generosity. You get gifts and feel awed at how someone could know you well enough to get you something so perfect.

A lot of these Christians will say that keeping Santa in Christmas or letting Christmas be all about gift giving is taking the Christ out of Christmas, but what will Jesus do for me in my lifetime as a 6 year old kid? Nothing. Yeah, I know Jesus loves us, but I have never seen Jesus's love for me. I have never ever received anything from him and I can't give him anything either. Kids don't understand "dying on the cross for your sins" very well and they don't understand "doing good deeds make him happy" very well either. They need physical instances of love, affection, kindness, and generosity. It's all very lofty and extremely out of reach for little kids and even me as an adult since I'd rather be nice to people because it's the good and right thing to do rather than do it so I get to have some eternal reward when I die.

tldr: kids understand Santa better than Jesus and it's not some heathen failing that they do.

[Carm_88]

Though there is no one in my immediate family that truly believes in Santa anymore, we still talk of him because he's the spirit of Christmas. Do we go to mass on Christmas Eve and hear of the nativity? Sure but seeing that Jesus wasn't born on Christmas, that's equally as false as Santa.
Derick wasn't hacked, if he was he would have said "Oh guys, I was hacked." He for some reason, thought it would be be ok to piss on everyone's traditions because he's an asshat. A self righteous, conceited asshole!

[Georgiana]

9 minutes ago, Carm_88 said:

Though there is no one in my immediate family that truly believes in Santa anymore, we still talk of him because he's the spirit of Christmas. Do we go to mass on Christmas Eve and hear of the nativity? Sure but seeing that Jesus wasn't born on Christmas, that's equally as false as Santa.
Derick wasn't hacked, if he was he would have said "Oh guys, I was hacked." He for some reason, thought it would be be ok to piss on everyone's traditions because he's an asshat. A self righteous, conceited asshole!

Since this is my first pagan Yule, I appreciate the fudging of the Christmas dates.  It makes it so easy to celebrate Yule (a part of which is celebrating the birth of the God from the Goddess, symbolically beginning a new cycle) under the trappings of Christmas so as not to upset my Catholic mother.  

And, since that was the intent all along, perhaps Derick just enjoys the pagan roots of Yuletide?  That is, I think, what I will assume.