Josiah Duggar is courting

[DuggarsTheEndIsNear]

I agree, but I do think that Tori, the Bates you are referring to, might have a crush on Joe. That obviously means nothing, because it doesn't mean he returns the feelings. But yeah. Just my gut feeling.

Though I suppose it is entirely possible he does and decided to go to Clown College in an attempt to be closer to her/get to know her better. But, based purely on what I've seen of both of them over the years, I am not sure it would be a good match. I think Tori would be too much for Joe.

I honestly always saw her and Josiah as being a thing. My first thought when Josiah's courtship was announced was wondering how Tori was taking it.

I know there was a reference made to her crushing on a Duggar and I just can't see that Duggar being Joe. He's just not the kind of guy I picture her being interested in. I think she needs a quirky, kind of dorky guy. Joe strikes me as a quiet, get things done kind of guy. Except his pranks (many of which I don't think are that funny, but I can't say I blame him with a role model like JB setting the line way past where it should be), I just don't feel like he has much of a fun personality. There's nothing wrong with that, but you definitely can't have his personality and be a good match for Tori.

[freejoyannatoo]

Okay so. It took me a day to sort of get all my feelings about this together.

My first instinct was "no, not Josiah. Please not Josiah." Annnnnd it was. I sort of knew he was going to be the first one to court, especially since he was away at ALERT for so long. But I didn't expect this soon. I was upset because he's my age! I think, like most of us, we wanted him to truly "escape" and run off and enroll in some super liberal New England college and write a tell-all book.

But adulthood only happens when you get married. I feel like Josiah felt trapped. His options were stay at ALERT (do they kick you out after you turn the 'legal age'?), stay at home and find some ridiculous job under the thumb of JB and share a bedroom with a bunch of tween boys, or get married. Marriage seems like the best option for him when it is laid out like that.

But announcing a courtship THIS soon? There is something really fishy about it. I'm sure we will hear from Michelle and (maybe) Josiah about how he simply "just couldn't keep it in much longer!!!!!" Not to mention announcing it when Marjorie is still a legal child? Even for the Duggars that's really sketchy.

Josiah saying that her "love of the Lord" is what attracted him to her? That's like someone saying "I love her because we both like the Red Sox". It's incredibly superficial, and I hope that in their "dating with a purpose" they find some sort of substance in one another.

I like Marjorie. She's seems really spunky and acts like she didn't get the high-spirited energy beaten out of her when she was six months old. Also. Pants. Hopefully she brings in some feminist ideologies to the courtship, nothing "extreme" but maybe suggests that if she wanted to work when they were married (besides being a religion teacher or a midwife) that it should be okay, also maybe *hopefully* a type of family planning. It seems like her family only really grew when she was 11 or so (right around the time it seems like her family met with the duggars). Maybe she grew up "normal" and then her family suddenly shifted to fundie life.

But I agree with what some people have said way back in the thread, that if she sips on that koolaid a little more she will become unbearable. Hannah Montana with a bible.

While there is a total weird space between the two of them, in the interview Josh said something about how he and Anna had "100 miles between them" and Josiah said that with he and Marjorie have "about ten miles" so I could be reading into it wrong, but it sounds like he was saying they would have way less rules about their courtship than Josh and Anna did. But then again, it could just literally mean distance :lol:

I'm honestly just shocked that so many media stations are picking this up and not freaking out. 17 YEARS OLD. When I was 17 I had braces! And this was only two years ago lol

Idk I still have a lot of mixed emotions. Josiah is my favorite by far, and he is so young and I just want him to succeed. I hope that this is the road to success for him.

This.

Josiah is impulsive, I think. Consider how he reacted to the news of J'Chelle's last pregnancy - he was the one who couldn't control his emotions (no blame here, I just think it's part of his personality).

And yes, he has NO way out of the nightmare other than marriage. College? No. A job other than working for Daddy? No. Just leave and live your own life? Not without destroying everything he's ever known.

Presumably the 18+ aged Duggars get their own money from People, Tlc etc. This is his one chance to earn at least a little money on his own. JB will have to house them, and it may not be lavish but it will have to be decent - he can hardly give Jilly a mansion and then put Siah in something tiny and run-down.

And I think Siah genuinely likes Marjorie - she's clever and dynamic. She wants the limelight so he doesn't have to try too hard. They are both creative types. They could be very good friends, and although that's hardly a basis for marriage that most of us would choose, maybe it's enough to make it a valid way out of the nightmare for him. If, and I so hope this is the case, they can avoid pregnancy, it may be OK.

So while I couldn't be sadder that Josiah isn't the one who tears up the script and finally gets to live his own life, at least he has found some kind of a way out. It's a horrible choice given his age, but it is probably better than the alternatives. I think that year he spent at ALERT will have given him plenty of thinking-time about what his choices realistically are, and he's chosen the best path available. (Actually I realise I've just contradicted what I said earlier about him being impulsive, but whatever).

[Phoenix]

He looks very young but I never noticed before how far his hairline recedes. The poor Duggar guys didn't get the best hairline genes.

There are worse things than having a husband who is bald or has a Jean Luc Picard type fringe of hair at a young age. On some guys it ends up looking sexy or other characteristics are so attractive to make it a moot point. We have seen Josiah can be charming. She may value a spouse who can make her laugh over one with perfect hair. Long term throwing your lot in with someone who is good company wears better than a full head of hair.

[Phoenix]

This was exactly my impression. She seemed too "ready" for the camera. Actually, she seems to love the camera. I know she's also an actress already.

Being an actress may be exactly what is needed to fill her public role as the new Duggar family pending sister-in-law/daughter-in-law. It is annoyingly inconsistent to criticize the Duggar offspring as being robots with no personality and then turn around and bash Marjorie for "being an actress" when all she has is community theater experience. Not like she she has been on TV or in movies before now. Do we really want to see another Duggar bride with the personality of a stick of gum parroting the same old tired lines? At least Marjorie shows some potential to be interesting. The ability to act could also be a saving grace in her marriage. She could turn it on for her in-laws and when the cameras are around and then be herself when it is just her and Josiah.

[sadiZ]

I honestly always saw her and Josiah as being a thing. My first thought when Josiah's courtship was announced was wondering how Tori was taking it.

I know there was a reference made to her crushing on a Duggar and I just can't see that Duggar being Joe. He's just not the kind of guy I picture her being interested in. I think she needs a quirky, kind of dorky guy. Joe strikes me as a quiet, get things done kind of guy. Except his pranks (many of which I don't think are that funny, but I can't say I blame him with a role model like JB setting the line way past where it should be), I just don't feel like he has much of a fun personality. There's nothing wrong with that, but you definitely can't have his personality and be a good match for Tori.

I thought the Tori crush might be Josiah as well, and wondered when his courtship was announced what her reaction was. But it still could be Joe, even though he doesn't seem a good personality match. He is at the Bates home a lot more than Josiah, because of his schooling, so he is around her. Plus, while I agree that Josiah might, intellectually, be more her type, a crush doesn't always (or even often) begin from personality. And, tbh, I find Joe the most attractive adult Duggar male, so maybe Tori agrees with me, haha. There really isn't any way to know, and we never will know unless Joe and Tori courted. Because if it was Siah she was interested in, unless he and Marj don't work out, there will never be a chance of that happening.

In related news - the TBT pic this week is of little Joe. Last week it was little Josiah (with Jana) and days later his courtship was announced. Who's going to climb aboard the speculation train with me? :nenner:

[MotherOfDragons]

You're welcome! :D

I'm the best there is at what I do! 8-) 8-) 8-) 8-) 8-)

Didn't mean for my observation/opinion to cause all this; I'm sorry.

[19 cats and counting]

I wonder what the rules of this courtship are. From the photos of the two that we've seen together, there's been no touch (not even side hugs) and is reminding me of the Zach/Sarah courtship that failed.

[Toothfairy]

I hope Marjorie doesn't get sucked in with the Duggars. Si can learn a lot from her and her family. Sad the only way out is marriage.

[louisa05]

I hope Marjorie doesn't get sucked in with the Duggars. Si can learn a lot from her and her family. Sad the only way out is marriage.

She will. I doubt that Jim Bob approves any courtship unless it is clear that the intended spouse can and will be assimilated to the Duggar way.

[JillyO]

I wonder what the rules of this courtship are. From the photos of the two that we've seen together, there's been no touch (not even side hugs) and is reminding me of the Zach/Sarah courtship that failed.

Oh :fsm:, I sincerely hope they don't use Siah and Marjorie to show that the kids really do set their own courtship rules. "See, these two have decided that they will not be touching at all until their wedding day. This way, they can focus all their energies on pleasing the Lord and they do not risk stirring up desires that cannot be righteously fulfilled." :angry-banghead:

[DuggarsTheEndIsNear]

This.

Josiah is impulsive, I think. Consider how he reacted to the news of J'Chelle's last pregnancy - he was the one who couldn't control his emotions (no blame here, I just think it's part of his personality).

And yes, he has NO way out of the nightmare other than marriage. College? No. A job other than working for Daddy? No. Just leave and live your own life? Not without destroying everything he's ever known.

Presumably the 18+ aged Duggars get their own money from People, Tlc etc. This is his one chance to earn at least a little money on his own. JB will have to house them, and it may not be lavish but it will have to be decent - he can hardly give Jilly a mansion and then put Siah in something tiny and run-down.

And I think Siah genuinely likes Marjorie - she's clever and dynamic. She wants the limelight so he doesn't have to try too hard. They are both creative types. They could be very good friends, and although that's hardly a basis for marriage that most of us would choose, maybe it's enough to make it a valid way out of the nightmare for him. If, and I so hope this is the case, they can avoid pregnancy, it may be OK.

So while I couldn't be sadder that Josiah isn't the one who tears up the script and finally gets to live his own life, at least he has found some kind of a way out. It's a horrible choice given his age, but it is probably better than the alternatives. I think that year he spent at ALERT will have given him plenty of thinking-time about what his choices realistically are, and he's chosen the best path available. (Actually I realise I've just contradicted what I said earlier about him being impulsive, but whatever).

First of all, we have NO idea what actually happened then. There is absolutely no proof that he "couldn't control his emotions." Since the first time that clip aired, there have been MANY interpretations of what happened and NONE of us know which is true. Cause, as far as I know, none of us was actually there or allowed to see the footage all the way through. So, judging him based on an interpretation of an edit is even more ridiculous than saying Jessa is a bratty princess because their parents made Jana give her Jana's jewelry box when she was very young.

Second, we KNOW he's known the family for years. They've been on the show for years. If he was truly impulsive, he would have started courting her much earlier. Or, he would have courted any number of girls that are of legal age so he could get married ASAP.

Third, even if he's getting married to get of the compound, that doesn't mean he's impulsive. Impulsive would be running away in the middle of the night after a fight. Impulsive would be moving to a big city (NYC or Chicago big, not Little Rock big) with absolutely no way to support himself. Impulsive would be to elope without any kind of dating/courting before hand. Announcing a courtship, which involves behind HEAVILY monitored and having absolutely NO privacy, with a girl who isn't even the legal age of majority (which likely means at least a year of courting before an engagement) is not impulsive.

Finally, absolutely none of your points actually showed that he was any more "impulsive" than anyone else. Though they're highly judgmental. I mean, she "wants the limelight"? She's an actress in musical theatre and somewhat comfortable in front of the camera (though, not really THAT comfortable, she talked like someone who was trying to fight her way through stage fright). That hardly makes her someone dreaming of the limelight.

[DuggarsTheEndIsNear]

Oh :fsm:, I sincerely hope they don't use Siah and Marjorie to show that the kids really do set their own courtship rules. "See, these two have decided that they will not be touching at all until their wedding day. This way, they can focus all their energies on pleasing the Lord and they do not risk stirring up desires that cannot be righteously fulfilled." :angry-banghead:

It could just be that he feels awkward with PDAs. I did with many of my ex boyfriends. And I still don't show affection toward boys in front of the camera/my parents.

[veron1que]

It could just be that he feels awkward with PDAs. I did with many of my ex boyfriends. And I still don't show affection toward boys in front of the camera/my parents.

Same...I've been with my SO for over 7 years and I'm still not touchy-feely in front of family.

[IReallyAmHopewell]

It could just be that he feels awkward with PDAs. I did with many of my ex boyfriends. And I still don't show affection toward boys in front of the camera/my parents.

It said that he interned with her Dad learning graphic arts so maybe they DO enjoy some of the same things--both are creative [within the limits of their "worldview"]. Don't worry though, they WILL be Quiverfull, will have kids and not use birth control. Not sure when her birthday is, but she'll be 18 soon enough. The show has a lock on another two years--a wedding, a baby, etc.

I do think getting to be an adult was a motivator for Josiah. And just because they wear pants doesn't mean Marjorie's family is any more liberal. At ATI/IBLP conferences there are strict dress codes, but at home if Daddy approves they can wear normal swimsuits or jeans or whatever Daddy deems appropriate. Don't read more into it than that. He wouldn't KNOW HER AT ALL if this wasn't the case.

[Mrs. Figg]

Yeah their tbt is Iittle Joe at the piano being likened to MOZART. Ooooookay.

[RosyDaisy]

Same...I've been with my SO for over 7 years and I'm still not touchy-feeling in front of family.

My husband and I aren't very touchy feely in public either. In fact, I think the only pictures of us kissing are from our wedding and last Christmas. Those pictures aren't on our social media pages.

[MotherOfDragons]

Anyone else think Josiah looks a bit like Jeremy Roloff in this pic?

Also, yes, his body language looks a little stilted in this photo, but that's the best I've seen Siah look in a LOOOONG time.

[JillyO]

My husband and I aren't very touchy feely in public either. In fact, I think the only pictures of us kissing are from our wedding and last Christmas. Those pictures aren't on our social media pages.

Just to clarify, I definitely think that it might just be that these to are not into PDA, or simply not yet very comfortable with each other physically. I was just idly speculating if they had different courtship rules. Not saying that they do.

[ColeMarie86]

Yeah their tbt is Iittle Joe at the piano being likened to MOZART. Ooooookay.

Those comparisons they make are so annoying. Duggars, comparing your adult children to old historical figures or saying they are concert pianists, graphic designers, or floral arrangers does not make them such! :angry-banghead:

[louisa05]

Those comparisons they make are so annoying. Duggars, comparing your adult children to old historical figures or saying they are concert pianists, graphic designers, or floral arrangers does not make them such! :angry-banghead:

Oh, but it works for them. Just reading on another forum about how the older girls are all midwives, and Josiah owns his own construction business, and all the kids are accomplished musicians, and half of them have had professional firefighting training and on and on...Along with a nice dose of how they are a "breath of fresh air" and "so much better than most teens and young adults" who are, of course, all self absorbed gun toting sex maniacs are something. And, of course, they could all go to college or otherwise leave home, they just chose not to because their family is the greatest in the universe.... :roll:

And this is a forum for an interest that tends to attract more progressive/liberal people.

[JenniferJuniper]

Urgh, she is like nails on a chalkboard. I can't stand that fake, theatre style of talking.

Yes, it's great she has a spark and isn't a meek little fundie girl, but I just can't stand listening to her talk.

I couldn't tell whether I would like her or not from that brief clip (nor do I see how anyone else can tell), however, she seemed waaaay too happy to be there doing her little Disney Channel character imitation.

Whatever is going on, I truly hope the courtship is fully Josiah's idea. It may be 10 years before we ever get close to the truth as to what is going on with this reality show family (I don't even see them as real fundies anymore; just TV characters), but from the whole Jessa's-beau-living-in-garage to Jill's strange birth story to now Josiah's courtship after spending nearly all of 2014 at ALERT, nothing seems natural about how they are living their lives. Nothing.

James will no doubt need a ghost writer when he pens his book sometime in the 2020's, but it should be an interesting read.

[freejoyannatoo]

First of all, we have NO idea what actually happened then. There is absolutely no proof that he "couldn't control his emotions." Since the first time that clip aired, there have been MANY interpretations of what happened and NONE of us know which is true. Cause, as far as I know, none of us was actually there or allowed to see the footage all the way through. So, judging him based on an interpretation of an edit is even more ridiculous than saying Jessa is a bratty princess because their parents made Jana give her Jana's jewelry box when she was very young.

Second, we KNOW he's known the family for years. They've been on the show for years. If he was truly impulsive, he would have started courting her much earlier. Or, he would have courted any number of girls that are of legal age so he could get married ASAP.

Third, even if he's getting married to get of the compound, that doesn't mean he's impulsive. Impulsive would be running away in the middle of the night after a fight. Impulsive would be moving to a big city (NYC or Chicago big, not Little Rock big) with absolutely no way to support himself. Impulsive would be to elope without any kind of dating/courting before hand. Announcing a courtship, which involves behind HEAVILY monitored and having absolutely NO privacy, with a girl who isn't even the legal age of majority (which likely means at least a year of courting before an engagement) is not impulsive.

Finally, absolutely none of your points actually showed that he was any more "impulsive" than anyone else. Though they're highly judgmental. I mean, she "wants the limelight"? She's an actress in musical theatre and somewhat comfortable in front of the camera (though, not really THAT comfortable, she talked like someone who was trying to fight her way through stage fright). That hardly makes her someone dreaming of the limelight.

Goodness me, how very rude.

Also you seem to be criticising me for something in someone else's post. I did not say she "wants the limelight". Perhaps try reading more carefully?

[Cleopatra7]

I couldn't tell whether I would like her or not from that brief clip (nor do I see how anyone else can tell), however, she seemed waaaay too happy to be there doing her little Disney Channel character imitation.

Whatever is going on, I truly hope the courtship is fully Josiah's idea. It may be 10 years before we ever get close to the truth as to what is going on with this reality show family (I don't even see them as real fundies anymore; just TV characters), but from the whole Jessa's-beau-living-in-garage to Jill's strange birth story to now Josiah's courtship after spending nearly all of 2014 at ALERT, nothing seems natural about how they are living their lives. Nothing.

James will no doubt need a ghost writer when he pens his book sometime in the 2020's, but it should be an interesting read.

The fact that all of the young adult Duggar spouses and fiances/fiancees have been leghumpers in some fashion also gives me reason for concern. Even before they had the show, they were celebrities of sorts in ATI circles, and that's where Anna first learned about Josh. As I recall, she mentioned in their courtship story that used to be on their website (don't know if it's there now) that she was kind of starstruck about the Duggars, but never dreamed that she would actually get to meet them, let alone marry one. Derrick and Ben seem to be more or less the same, i.e., fans hoping to meet and marry a Duggar. The Jacksons seem to be part of a NW Arkansas fundie/fundie-lite orbit that has the Duggars at the center, so it's not surprising that one of their children would eventually court a Duggar, but once again, they do seem to be leghumpers who are glad to provide goods and services for the Duggar "ministry." It makes me wonder if the Duggars have normal relationships with anyone outside of the family or if everyone they know if sucking up/leghumping them for a variety of reasons.

[ColeMarie86]

Oh, but it works for them. Just reading on another forum about how the older girls are all midwives, and Josiah owns his own construction business, and all the kids are accomplished musicians, and half of them have had professional firefighting training and on and on...Along with a nice dose of how they are a "breath of fresh air" and "so much better than most teens and young adults" who are, of course, all self absorbed gun toting sex maniacs are something. And, of course, they could all go to college or otherwise leave home, they just chose not to because their family is the greatest in the universe.... :roll:

And this is a forum for an interest that tends to attract more progressive/liberal people.

Lol! :D Yes, I can just imagine what we as society can accomplish if we all took up the Duggar's ideals. Forget the over-population myth! Let's all socially isolate ourselves and limit what jobs we're capable of doing! We'd end up creating towns that look like Mickey Mouse is mayor. Crooked houses, empty businesses or businesses only run by men in barbershop quartet outfits, online colleges that take one day to get a degree, beaches with bathing wagons for women, and all the families walking through the town like they're doing the locomotion. :lol: :roll:

[Quiver Me J'imbers]

This.

Josiah is impulsive, I think. Consider how he reacted to the news of J'Chelle's last pregnancy - he was the one who couldn't control his emotions (no blame here, I just think it's part of his personality).

And yes, he has NO way out of the nightmare other than marriage. College? No. A job other than working for Daddy? No. Just leave and live your own life? Not without destroying everything he's ever known.

Presumably the 18+ aged Duggars get their own money from People, Tlc etc. This is his one chance to earn at least a little money on his own. JB will have to house them, and it may not be lavish but it will have to be decent - he can hardly give Jilly a mansion and then put Siah in something tiny and run-down.

Do we know that they actually receive/get to keep their money once they turn 18? I have always speculated about this and wonder if they have accounts set up in their names that are controlled by JB, kind of like a trust, that they'd only receive upon marriage. If not, you'd think that at least *one* of them would try to escape, go off to college, wear pants, etc. While fundie life may have been beaten into them, the show has to have given them decent exposure to the outside world (which is apparent even by the vocab/slang the kids use) and they'd be aware of options available in life besides managing a household or working for Duggar Construction. I think they are legit stuck unless they want to be kicked out with nothing to their name. The lack of education doesn't help either.

I had always hoped Josiah would manage to escape regardless, but it looks like he may have been targeted by JB as someone who might not follow family protocol, hence the 9mos at Alert and the quickie courtship. For him, whether he likes Marjorie romantically or just as a friend, it's an easy way out of TTH and an easy way to please JB and J'chelle into thinking that whatever rebellion he had in him has been beaten out of him. I suppose it remains to be see whether the courtship lasts and if so, if he follows in the footsteps of the rest of the fam - I had always thought once Jessa was married she'd do what she wanted, but it doesn't seem to be that way - but I really hope his spirit wasn't completely crushed. :(