Bates Updates - Part 2

[nolongerIFBx]

Sometimes it is 3 miscarriages before doctors will really start looking for problems. I have an acquaintance that lost 3 pregnancies before the doctors started doing testing and discovered that she had antiphospholipid syndrome while she was pregnant and she had to inject heparin daily for the rest of that pregnancy to decrease the chances that she would lose that pregnancy. But because miscarriage is common, doctors don't jump into testing for only a few losses (I'm not trying to belittle that any loss is great; this is just the way medical science looks at it). Now that Erin now medically qualifies as someone with recurrent miscarriages, hopefully doctors are now taking Erin's miscarriages seriously and will help her in discovering what is causing her miscarriages.

[NotALoserLikeYou]

Aw, how sad. Kelly needs progesterone to keep from miscarrying and hopefully Erin's problem is not any more severe than needing that, too.

I like Chad, he seems so loving toward her.

[Vivi_music]

Aww poor Erin. I can't snark on her situation. It's sad for any couple who wants a baby but have a hard time conceiving. I hope she and Chad are there for one another and that she doesn't feel less of a woman because of this.

If Kelly did have a few miscarriages before, maybe she can comfort her daughter a bit. And maybe it can give Erin and Chad courage to continue trying.

[anjulibai]

Not impossible at all. Her first miscarriage was in March. Just as an example, she could've gotten pregnant again in May and miscarried in June/July - pregnant again in September and miscarried in October/November.

I could have sworn her first miscarriage was in January or February.

But even still, I don't think it's unlikely to have that many in a year.

Poor Erin. How horrible to go through all of that. I really hope she doesn't blame herself for it. :(

[anjulibai]

BTW, Kelly has had 4 miscarriages, including after she was diagnosed with needing the progesterone. She was pretty far along with at least one of them, too.

[Mela99]

That's so sad. They obviously love each other a lot... I hope it works out for them.

[speshulsnowflake]

:cry: Poor thing. At least it seems like she has hit the fundie jackpot with her husband.

[amers]

So how do they handle something like a miscarriage in their beliefs? If the Duggars went all mega family because they viewed a miscarriage as punishment for birth control do they see ALL miscarriages as a punishment? Or is it a pick and choose thing? I've never heard them address that.

[singsingsing]

So how do they handle something like a miscarriage in their beliefs? If the Duggars went all mega family because they viewed a miscarriage as punishment for birth control do they see ALL miscarriages as a punishment? Or is it a pick and choose thing? I've never heard them address that.

I seriously doubt it given that many (maybe even most) of them have miscarriages. The Duggars didn't think they were being arbitrarily punished by God for using birth control so much as they believed that because they were sinful they used hormonal birth control and accidentally aborted their baby.

[blackkatya]

Where was that written about Erin's miscarriages? The timeline doesn't really seem right...haven't they only been married a year? Three miscarriages in one year (especially if the one we read about was her first) seems unlikely, almost impossible. She'd have to have gotten pregnant almost immediately after each one. Anyway, I hope it's not true. :(

I had 2 in one year, and that was with a 8 month break in TTC between the two. It's definitely possible.

Poor Erin. :cry: Fertility issues were the hardest thing I ever had to deal with.

[RosyDaisy]

This is Christian patriarchal fundamentalism. They can sugarcoat and pretend in front of the cameras all they want. Miscarriages for fundies are considered punishment from God for some kind of sin for them. That is one giant guilt trip for Erin, and she doesn't deserve it. No woman does. I pray she and Chad can muster up the courage to tell them all to fuck off.

Also, I think Kelly needs to be reminded that they have been on TV before. Let's see. They have appeared on 19KAC a few times, twice on Nightline, and had their own show on TLC that lasted 8 episodes. So, Kelly, you have invited the cameras in before. Stop misleading people!

I so can't wait for the snark and rumors to increase and for the tabloids to have a field day with the Bates family. They are just as horrible and hateful as the Duggars. Hell, even Gil's family are barely able to tolerate them. I really don't get why people think this family is more likeable. I just don't.

[Odd1Out]

So how do they handle something like a miscarriage in their beliefs? If the Duggars went all mega family because they viewed a miscarriage as punishment for birth control do they see ALL miscarriages as a punishment? Or is it a pick and choose thing? I've never heard them address that.

I never got the feeling they think miscarriage is punishment or that they even blame the wife.

I do remember someone on here saying that the Wissman dad used to preach that miscarriage was punishment for sin till it happened to his wife, then changed his tune. But, I don't know if that's a fact. Thankfully, the Bates seem to be very sympathetic.

[Ofglen]

This is Christian patriarchal fundamentalism. They can sugarcoat and pretend in front of the cameras all they want. Miscarriages for fundies are considered punishment from God for some kind of sin for them. That is one giant guilt trip for Erin, and she doesn't deserve it. No woman does. I pray she and Chad can muster up the courage to tell them all to fuck off.

Also, I think Kelly needs to be reminded that they have been on TV before. Let's see. They have appeared on 19KAC a few times, twice on Nightline, and had their own show on TLC that lasted 8 episodes. So, Kelly, you have invited the cameras in before. Stop misleading people!

I so can't wait for the snark and rumors to increase and for the tabloids to have a field day with the Bates family. They are just as horrible and hateful as the Duggars. Hell, even Gil's family are barely able to tolerate them. I really don't get why people think this family is more likeable. I just don't.

I always get the feeling that they consider miscarriage punishment (even if they don't say it out loud)- until it happens to them. They're all terrible hypocrites. So, because Kelly has had 4 miscarriages Erin may not be getting blamed for her fertility struggles by her own immediate family, but I am positive that other fundies are blaming her.

Yeah, you're right that they're just as bad as the Duggars. I think people are just fooled by the Southern charm facade or the fact that there hasn't been a 9-season long show to snark on yet.

[singsingsing]

This is Christian patriarchal fundamentalism. They can sugarcoat and pretend in front of the cameras all they want. Miscarriages for fundies are considered punishment from God for some kind of sin for them. That is one giant guilt trip for Erin, and she doesn't deserve it. No woman does. I pray she and Chad can muster up the courage to tell them all to fuck off.

I pray they can muster the courage to tell 'them' (who?) to fuck off, IF in fact this is actually happening. Which there is currently zero evidence of. Particularly coming from her own family, from her mother who has herself had several miscarriages, or from the Duggars, who have also dealt with multiple miscarriages, or from any fundie, most of whom have, you guessed it, been impacted by miscarriages either personally or via a loved one's experience.

[eh02]

I had 2 in one year, and that was with a 8 month break in TTC between the two. It's definitely possible.

Poor Erin. :cry: Fertility issues were the hardest thing I ever had to deal with.

I am sorry you had to go through that :( For some reason I felt like Erin's miscarriage (that she shared) was not as long ago as that. How horrible for her. :(

Fundies have a very weird way of looking at fertility. I don't think they would ever explicitly say that infertility is some sort of punishment for a sin - after all, horrible sinners everywhere have kids all the time. But children are supposed to be the "ultimate blessing." Even unexpected or unwanted pregnancies are called "blessings." But Erin doesn't get any blessings? It must really shake you to plan for motherhood your entire life and then go through three miscarriages in a row. Honestly, it must feel like a slap in the face to be a fundie who has worked so hard - and deprived yourself of so much - to live this lifestyle and "do things right" and then not be able to have a baby, which is what they are trained to do from such a young age.

Erin will probably be able to cope with fertility issues better than many fundie women - at least she has a job and a skill to keep her occupied, I hope. Not much could be worse than sitting around at home all day as a SAHW, feeling awful about your fertility issues.

[halcionne]

I am sorry you had to go through that :( For some reason I felt like Erin's miscarriage (that she shared) was not as long ago as that. How horrible for her. :(

Fundies have a very weird way of looking at fertility. I don't think they would ever explicitly say that infertility is some sort of punishment for a sin - after all, horrible sinners everywhere have kids all the time. But children are supposed to be the "ultimate blessing." Even unexpected or unwanted pregnancies are called "blessings." But Erin doesn't get any blessings? It must really shake you to plan for motherhood your entire life and then go through three miscarriages in a row. Honestly, it must feel like a slap in the face to be a fundie who has worked so hard - and deprived yourself of so much - to live this lifestyle and "do things right" and then not be able to have a baby, which is what they are trained to do from such a young age.

Erin will probably be able to cope with fertility issues better than many fundie women - at least she has a job and a skill to keep her occupied, I hope. Not much could be worse than sitting around at home all day as a SAHW, feeling awful about your fertility issues.

They don't explicitly call themselves quiverfull, either...

[NotALoserLikeYou]

A lot of fundies have a general belief that any bad thing that happens to you is brought about by your own sin and not being under gods protection. I've heard "if you do your part, God will do His part!" enough times in my life. I don't see why miscarriage would be any different, especially with Gothards beliefs. If a successful baby is a blessing from God, what is a miscarriage?

File this under questions we will never have the answer to.

[artdecades]

I was just Reading the bios on the website, there says that Lawson is a fan of Carrie Underwood, Alyssa's favorite movie is captain américa, and Josie's favorite book is Sherlock Holmes. So worldly!

Captain America you say? The thirst is real :soda:

How defrauding.

[gustava]

Why are we feeling so sorry for Erin's miscarriages when most of us don't support QF?

Moreover, three miscarriages in 14 months?? How would she even know she'd been pregnant 3 times? That's approximately one miscarriage every 4 months.

She'd be taking a pregnancy test every day.

I'm not diminishing the sorrow for those FJers who have miscarried. Just raising some questions.

[crazysnark]

The Bates will be on GMA tomorrow morning. I bet they will announce the gender of Alyssas baby.

[Rescinded and Mended]

Weren't Michelle's exact words when she lost Jubilee "The Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away?"

Maybe some fundies view miscarriages as God's will and not as any sort of punishment for sin.

[coffeebean7]

Why are we feeling so sorry for Erin's miscarriages when most of us don't support QF?

Moreover, three miscarriages in 14 months?? How would she even know she'd been pregnant 3 times? That's approximately one miscarriage every 4 months.

She'd be taking a pregnancy test every day.

I'm not diminishing the sorrow for those FJers who have miscarried. Just raising some questions.

I sort of see what you are saying but they are not really mutually exclusive concepts. Nobody should have to suffer a miscarriage. I certainly don't support QF, but I wouldn't wish anyone to not be able to have a child that they want. Also, Erin is happily married, ready and trying to have a baby, and doesn't have one. That's pretty worthy of sympathy imo. As much as I snarked on JB & Michelle trying to have their 20th baby, I still even felt sorry for her when she miscarried Jubilee, despite Michelle's viewpoints driving me crazy.

I don't understand your thought process in that it would be impossible for Erin to know she was pregnant 3 times in a 14 month period? One miscarriage every 4 months is very possible and easy to notice. If your period returns fairly soon after your miscarriage and you ovulate and conceive right away, you would find out you are pregnant about 2 weeks after ovulation around when your period might return. No need for daily pregnancy tests. Even if she were taking a lot of tests frequently, that's definitely not uncommon for anyone trying to conceive. I would take several a day in the days before my period was expected, because it's so hard NOT to.

[eh02]

Why are we feeling so sorry for Erin's miscarriages when most of us don't support QF?

Moreover, three miscarriages in 14 months?? How would she even know she'd been pregnant 3 times? That's approximately one miscarriage every 4 months.

She'd be taking a pregnancy test every day.

I'm not diminishing the sorrow for those FJers who have miscarried. Just raising some questions.

What does being QF have to do with it? I might disagree with a lot of Erin's beliefs, and I may hope that she and the rest of them don't pop out 20 kids a piece, but I definitely don't wish her sadness, poor health, or a lifetime of stress dealing with infertility. That's cold!

If the miscarriages aren't super early (before ~6 weeks) she would almost definitely know what was happening, especially after the first one. If she had the first in January or February, she could have been pregnant again by April, miscarried by June, pregnant again by September, miscarried before the end of the year. Not an impossible timeframe if they are trying every month, which I'm sure they are since Erin clearly wants to be a mom. I don't really think it'd be fair to judge her for testing frequently, either. Women with fertility problems often do test frequently, and I don't think that is weird at all when you have a heightened sense of anxiety about your fertility issues.

[BirthingGodsWarriors]

Did anyone catch them on Good Morning America? If so, what did they talk about besides plugging the new show? Any engagement/courting/sex reveal/pregnancy updates or news?

[singsingsing]

http://abcnews.go.com/GMA/video/bates-f ... s-27947322

Nothing new, just pimping the show. I think it was Erin who said a few days ago that she thought Nathan or Lawson would be next to court but there was currently nothing on the horizon.