Bates Updates - Part 2

[JHeathen]

I wouldn't say it's too big an age gap, but Joy has said herself on multiple occasions over the past few months that she doesn't want to get married any time soon. I'd be really surprised if she were courting or even pre-courting anyone.

Do you mean over the past televised season? Because how far behind reality are the shows...6-9 months? Or less? If she said it in talking heads, a quote could be from even further back in time...

[singsingsing]

Do you mean over the past televised season? Because how far behind reality are the shows...6-9 months? Or less? If she said it in talking heads, a quote could be from even further back in time...

Yeah, that's what I mean. I can't remember if she only said it in the talking heads or if she said it in on-the-spot interviews, nor can I remember if the most recent statement was around the time of Jill's wedding, or if she said something similar when Jessa got engaged, but it was within the past few months (in other words, less than a year, possibly a lot more lately). Of course people can change their minds quite quickly, but I don't remember her older sisters at her age proclaiming again and again that they were not ready to be married anytime soon. I got the impression that she's not quite ready to jump to that stage of life yet.

[anjulibai]

Yeah, it's not it's age gap, it's the ages themselves being so different, even if girls are forced to be more mature. Like, think about yourself at 17, and then at 22. Big difference! There's just a lot of changing and maturing that happens during those transition years to adulthood. I totally agree, 23/28 wouldn't be so bad at all.

When I was 19, I started dating a 23 year old. The age difference definitely caused issues, based on maturity and the types of things I liked to do and could do.

But, when I was 22 I started dating a 26 year old, my now husband. We had more in common and were closer in maturity and interests (I had matured a lot, btw).

Now we're 30 and 34 and there's no problem with our ages.

But when you are that young, those few years difference mean a lot, in terms of experience, outlook, interests, maturity, etc.

[singsingsing]

I think it depends more on the individuals involved in the relationship. Some 17-year-olds are far more mature than some 22-year-olds.

[Ofglen]

I think it depends more on the individuals involved in the relationship. Some 17-year-olds are far more mature than some 22-year-olds.

True, I've met some very childish people I'm their early 20s. But all 17-year-olds are still children regardless of their maturity level. I thought I was the most adult person in the world at 17 and wouldnt have seen anything wrong with a 22 y/o and a 17 y/o. Looking back now of course, I can see how creepy this situation is..

[HereticHick]

Anyone else think that Brandon & Michael got engaged over Christmas & they are waiting to announce it until after the show debuts?

[Ralar]

I think it said "don't they make a cute couple" or something like that. It was posted here after it was seen on Anna's

Instagram. It's probably in one of the Duggar threads. I'll search for it. But yeah, Joy is too young for Lawson. He's a grown ass man, and she's a teenager. Ewwww!

He's 22, lives at home and shares a dormitory-style bedroom with 8 younger brothers. He's never held hands or kissed a woman, or even been on a date. It's not like he's a 22 year old frat boy. I'm not sure there's much of an emotional age gap between him and Joy.

If they are interested in one another, I hope they have a long "getting to know" one another stage because Joy is young. But, I really don't see a problem with the age difference. FWIW, when I was a college freshman my BF was a 3rd year grad student.

[pineapple450]

Kinda proud of Erin & Alyssa both spending Christmas at their inlaws. I feel like the Duggars expect every child to spend every holiday in the Tinkertoy House until eternity.

I think it more has to do with their extreme patriarchy. Like the woman becomes part of the man's family and they do stuff there instead. Sure some stuff over at the woman's family, but not the same level. I think Jessa and Jill both spent the holidays with their hubbies' families as well.

[crazysnark]

As of Christmas, Brandon and Michaela are not engaged. Kelly said so in comments

[singsingsing]

Didn't she go visit his family at about this time last year and that's when they started courting? I bet he'll propose on their one year 'courtiversary'. I'm going to be really surprised if they're not engaged before the new year!

[Ralar]

As of Christmas, Brandon and Michaela are not engaged. Kelly said so in comments

They probably cannot get engaged until after Brandon completes his studies. He's not even supposed to be courting.

[crazysnark]

He graduated last month

[Ralar]

He graduated last month

IIn that case, I agree that there is an impending engagement.

[Ofglen]

Didn't Kelly say something at some point about how they probably wouldn't be getting married until late spring? I think it was because Brandon needed to save up money, but don't quote me on that part. Maybe that's why they aren't engaged yet? Fundie engagements tend to be really short. If they don't get engaged before the new year, I'd expect a v-day proposal. That would give Brandon enough time before the wedding to save (if that's what it is).

[HereticHick]

Or they could get engaged on Michael's 25th bday, January 23.

Good for them for saving up before they get married, instead of just saying "God will provide, la,la,la" or making Brandon become Gil's pool boy (like Benbob)

[NotALoserLikeYou]

Whitney posted this pic on Christmas with the caption, "Love my little family"

Who is the older couple? They aren't her adoptive parents. Could they be the allusive bio parents? Or maybe grandparents.

[HereticHick]

Is Whitney wearing a neck brace?

[PennySycamore]

Is Whitney wearing a neck brace?

I can't tell if that's a neck brace or turtleneck that's rolled down a bit, like a cowlneck.

[crazysnark]

POOR ERIN ;( She hasnt had just ONE miscarriage. She has had THREE!.

"They had the one miscarriage and that was followed by two others. When the film crew asked them if they felt comfortable sharing that, they both prayed about it and they realized that there are a lot of people that have experienced the same thing, the same heartache, the same struggle, and they felt like if they are sharing and opening up their hearts and their struggles … if that could help another person realize [they're] not alone and can get through it with faith in the Lord, then it was worth doing. The thought of helping others gave them purpose in what they were going through."

[singsingsing]

Aw man, poor Erin. :( I'd been hoping for her sake it was a one off thing and they were just having a little trouble conceiving.

[Ralar]

POOR ERIN ;( She hasnt had just ONE miscarriage. She has had THREE!.

"They had the one miscarriage and that was followed by two others. When the film crew asked them if they felt comfortable sharing that, they both prayed about it and they realized that there are a lot of people that have experienced the same thing, the same heartache, the same struggle, and they felt like if they are sharing and opening up their hearts and their struggles … if that could help another person realize [they're] not alone and can get through it with faith in the Lord, then it was worth doing. The thought of helping others gave them purpose in what they were going through."

Where did you find this? I don't see it on the Kelley's blog or Chad & Erin's.

I feel terrible for Erin. I can't think of much worse than being raised to think your sole purpose in life is to give birth to as many children as possible, only to discover that you can't carry a baby. I hope she gets the medical assistance she needs to have a child or two, or even three, and then stops.

[eh02]

Where was that written about Erin's miscarriages? The timeline doesn't really seem right...haven't they only been married a year? Three miscarriages in one year (especially if the one we read about was her first) seems unlikely, almost impossible. She'd have to have gotten pregnant almost immediately after each one. Anyway, I hope it's not true. :(

[crazysnark]

christianpost.com/news/bringing-up-bates-parents-share-reason-for-going-public-address-key-family-struggles-ahead-of-tv-premiere-video--131851/

[singsingsing]

Where was that written about Erin's miscarriages? The timeline doesn't really seem right...haven't they only been married a year? Three miscarriages in one year (especially if the one we read about was her first) seems unlikely, almost impossible. She'd have to have gotten pregnant almost immediately after each one. Anyway, I hope it's not true. :(

Not impossible at all. Her first miscarriage was in March. Just as an example, she could've gotten pregnant again in May and miscarried in June/July - pregnant again in September and miscarried in October/November.

[Justme]

Erin can certainly suffered 3 miscarriages in her 14 month marriage. Poor thing! Didn't Kelly have several miscarriages, too? I though I read that during her last pregnancies, as soon as she found out, she went to the Doctor for medicine to help maintain the pregnancy.

Look at Mel Maxwell. She had several miscarriages. They were also married 4 years before their first child, Savannah (who passed shortly after birth).

I hope Erin is seeing a good Doctor and not just a midwife.