Alyssa & John - light dessert reception.

[yetanothermeg]

I want to know what the baloney on a stick is too! Is it like a hot dog on a stick, cause I would LOVE to see pics of fundies with their mouths wrapped around a corndog, if ya know what I mean!

[yetanothermeg]

Folded coldcuts...daintily presented with an olive and toothpick. I thought it was actually ham?

Whoops, we cross posted. I've been to several wedding with cold cuts and sides, however, we put it on a plate and sat down. if they are gonna fold it, I would at least want to see a baloney crane or perhaps a cross.

[LadyPriss]

I opened gifts as I got them, just so that I could manage the flow of thank-you notes.

That makes sense. Note to self- keep address list of who I invite in order to do a second run of thank you note envelopes.

[LadyPriss]

Whoops, we cross posted. I've been to several wedding with cold cuts and sides, however, we put it on a plate and sat down. if they are gonna fold it, I would at least want to see a baloney crane or perhaps a cross.

Here...its on the wedding prep page.

blog.thebatesfamily.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/12/4.jpg

[yetanothermeg]

Here...its on the wedding prep page.

blog.thebatesfamily.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/12/4.jpg

That certainly looks like a mouthful!

[Lillybee]

I think that he family may throw a more elaborate party when the bride and groom get settled in where ever they are going to live.

[Rebelwife]

Our Hobby Lobby sells a lot of occasional furniture (small tables, bakers racks, ottomans, etc.) as well as lots of home decorating stuff like lamps, mirrors, picture frames and things. I can see where gift cards there could be very useful if you were furnishing a new home.

[Mela99]

I wouldn't do it for my wedding, but I think it's a nice idea. Maybe paired with a coffee bar, that would be a little side of heaven for a party. Dessert and coffee reception? Oh hell yes. I'd provide booze for the coffee tho...

[lilith]

There is refreshingly little fundie gushing about how holy and chaste their courtship is and how God brought them together. Not a bible verse to be seen, just an obligatory mention of The Lord allowing their relationship to grow. Good for Alyssa!

[PennySycamore]

I haven't been to a huge number of weddings, but a few, well, I kinda wish they put the money toward desserts instead of the meal served. If I get married, its gonna happen in my backyard, and the money is going toward 'stuff you BBQ' and 'you are not on a diet today desserts and candy'.

What does the Hobby Lobby sell? Last I checked she was asking for hobby lobby giftcards. I googled that and saw some religious lawsuit of Hobby Lobby, but not much else. Im guessing its a craft store?

Is it normal for people who have gifts mailed to open before the wedding? Comments were made on Bates site to the fact that Erin had opened her gifts as they arrived in the mail. Then again, if Alyssa preopens her gifts, she could get those gift cards to decorate the wedding...

Hobby Lobby is a crafts store and "home decor" with an ass-load of tacky wedding stuff. I'd hate it if Alyssa and John got a bunch of HL gift cards only to use them to provide decor for wedding. Of course, if they did that and didn't decorate their house with a bunch of HL crapola, they'd probably end up with a more tastefully decorated house.

It's not only considered okay to open your wedding gifts as they arrive , it's considered a little tacky to bring gifts to the wedding as it's too easy to misplace things. I think it's a little more acceptable to bring gifts to the wedding that it used to be, but it's still better to have them delivered to the bride's home.

[OkToBeTakei]

That certainly looks like a mouthful!

Why do people say a load of old baloney? Meaning rubbish? That actually looks not too bad. MEGA disappointed, need a new gross avatar :cry:

[acheronbeach]

Why do people say a load of old baloney? Meaning rubbish? That actually looks not too bad. MEGA disappointed, need a new gross avatar :cry:

OT, but when I need disgusting pictures, I just go to Rachael Ray's website. Her food photos look like something from the X Files, particularly her stuffed shells and her Rach's Rouladen.

Also, I like this dessert reception thing way better than the self-indulgent day-long marathon weddings where you take forty themed pictures (All the bride's coworkers from her previous employer! All the groom's cousins! All the non-Chinese guests! The bride's floor hockey team!) and dancing and twelve course dinners and lots of boring speeches and powerpoints... the only thing that makes them tolerable is the open bar.

[YPestis]

I'm gonna go against the grain and say I would probably never do a dessert reception. The Chinese in me says if there's a wedding reception, it requires a meal! Plus, my Italian husband demands that we overfeed the guests! I wouldn't have minded an elopement in Vegas but when a wedding reception was decided, there was no argument (from either side) that this would be a sit down dinner. When we went to China to meet the relatives, we went through several expensive lunch and dinner receptions. It would have been rude for them not to offer and rude for us to refuse. We all simply got very fat. Food is just integral to some cultures.....

Ok, I do think a dessert reception is "classier" than hot dogs or cheap hamburgers. From a cultural standpoint, there's precedence for high class desserts and appetizer receptions. Mass produced cheap foods, not so much. Of course, not all weddings need to be classy, food just needs to fit a "theme" (informal/traditional/etc). However, if one is going for a "classic" wedding, but have a small budget and/or large wedding list, desserts and appetizers are the way to go.

With these non-meal receptions in mind, I think one needs to remind the guests that it's NOT a meal and ensure that it doesn't clash with actual meal times. It's just the height of rudeness to invite guests over during meal time and NOT feed them.

After having my own wedding, I'd also suggest that any long distance guests be invited to at least one (sit-down) meal, preferably dinner. We had people taking time off work, flying in and staying one or two nights. We made sure they were fed at the rehearsal dinner and the wedding dinner. I would hate to serve them cake and punch after coming all this way. If I expect people to pay for a plane ticket, the least I could do is sit down with them for a meal.

[RandomTrivia]

Our Hobby Lobby sells a lot of occasional furniture (small tables, bakers racks, ottomans, etc.) as well as lots of home decorating stuff like lamps, mirrors, picture frames and things. I can see where gift cards there could be very useful if you were furnishing a new home.

Hobby Lobby seems to be a lot like Michaels and Jo-Ann Fabrics - art & craft supplies, fabric, scrapbooking stuff out the ears. HL adds small furniture, insane amounts of picture frames, and knick-knacky home decor. Our Hobby Lobby has some small furniture, but not a lot as I recall, also lots of decorative pillows and such. Not sure what the quality is like on the furniture, but the few things I looked at seemed grossly overpriced, unless it was on clearance. Throw pillows for $99??!!?? (I think their pricing is a little deceptive, though - certain fabrics are always 30% off the marked price, for example. And of course there's always a 40% off coupon in the paper.

[DGayle]

I never understood the big role mints play in receptions where savory food is not going to be served. I always associate them as needed after a rich meal to freshen your breath.

Those little mints are to cleanse the palate when you switch food. Fancier circles will use tiny dishes of sorbet between courses.

[DGayle]

Here...its on the wedding prep page.

blog.thebatesfamily.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/12/4.jpg

Am I going to hell for snickering at that? I hate green olives.

[DGayle]

OT, but when I need disgusting pictures, I just go to Rachael Ray's website. Her food photos look like something from the X Files, particularly her stuffed shells and her Rach's Rouladen.

Also, I like this dessert reception thing way better than the self-indulgent day-long marathon weddings where you take forty themed pictures (All the bride's coworkers from her previous employer! All the groom's cousins! All the non-Chinese guests! The bride's floor hockey team!) and dancing and twelve course dinners and lots of boring speeches and powerpoints... the only thing that makes them tolerable is the open bar.

One of my aunts had a wedding like this. Worse, the pictures were scheduled in half hour blocks and we were given lists with our blocks. So we couldn't go back to our hotels after the 10am ceremony and change and kick back until the 7pm reception because we had to be at pictures at noon and 2 and 3:30 or whatever. Want to make it suck more? It was over 100 outside that day, and the ceremony and reception venues were historical places with no air conditioning.

[scc12]

I don't see anything wrong w it.My sister got married in '78 and did the cake/punch/nuts/mints thing.She only had 3 ppl...our aunts,to serve.

When she got married again in '87,she went for even less and just did cake n punch.Me and one of my aunts served.

There was no dancing at either,and we're not fundies.We had to set up the chairs ourselves...metal ones from the Sunday school classrooms..and no tables at all.Guests just ate their cake in their seat.

I eloped so we didn't do any of that. :)

[scc12]

I think I'd rather have Beenie weenies on a stick as opposed to baloney.well,at least they didn't serve that awful recipe of fried bologna w mashed potatoes n cheese on top.ick.

[Pretzel]

Oh my gosh, I hate food snob-ism, but when it comes to Weddings my inner food-snob reaches the height of a skyscraper. Holy Moly, bologna on a stick, light dessert, chicken salad, got-hard cake...these fundies never seize to amaze me with their tackiness.

Where I come from, the church wedding / civil marriage is followed by a sparkling wine reception (either in front/at church or at restaurant/party room) followed by a reception (at a restaurant) that serves a gigantic load of delicious cakes, a several course dinner and dessert. Open bar throughout the whole thing. Appropriate music and classical dancing (waltz, etc. ). In order to save a bit of money people will often decide to invite their not so close friends partially, either for cake'n'wine or dinner. It's not considered tacky or anything.

When it comes to weddings I know I should say that it's the bride and groom's day and that they are to decide how their wedding should be like.

But I'm a wedding SNOB. Sorry.

[samurai_sarah]

Oh my gosh, I hate food snob-ism, but when it comes to Weddings my inner food-snob reaches the height of a skyscraper. Holy Moly, bologna on a stick, light dessert, chicken salad, got-hard cake...these fundies never seize to amaze me with their tackiness.

Where I come from, the church wedding / civil marriage is followed by a sparkling wine reception (either in front/at church or at restaurant/party room) followed by a reception (at a restaurant) that serves a gigantic load of delicious cakes, a several course dinner and dessert. Open bar throughout the whole thing. Appropriate music and classical dancing (waltz, etc. ). In order to save a bit of money people will often decide to invite their not so close friends partially, either for cake'n'wine or dinner. It's not considered tacky or anything.

When it comes to weddings I know I should say that it's the bride and groom's day and that they are to decide how their wedding should be like.

But I'm a wedding SNOB. Sorry.

Hmm...I have a sneaking suspicion that I'm a wedding snob too. :lol:

Where I come from, a church wedding/ registry office wedding is immediately followed by sparkling wine and canapés, followed by a lavish lunch (Catholic couples are supposed to fast till mass, so lunch is huge). Then everyone disperses for a brief walk, while the couple takes pictures, followed by coffee and cake. Dinner comes a bit later, after everyone has socialized more, followed by dancing. At around midnight, there's cheese, cake and other snacks, and then more dancing. An open bar throughout is a must.

eta: I come from a very Catholic area

[Rosie]

It's a different church from Erin and Chad. There were married at Second Baptist in Clinton.

What determines in which church they are married?

Do they have any association with either of these churches?

[nokidsmom]

There is absolutely nothing wrong with a light dessert wedding reception so long as you let people know upfront. Weddings have gone totally out of control in extravagance, IM not so humble O, of course. Gah! it is about getting married not throwing the party of the decade! Disclaimer, I would much rather have eloped but was pressured into a bigger wedding than I wanted 33 years ago. I'm still sore about that.

The Bateses probably blew several years' food budget on Erin's extravagant nuptuals even as they defrayed the cost by letting TLC film it. Perhaps this Bates kid doesn't want an extravaganza like Erin's or to be filmed. I'd be willing to bet that Michael doesn't either but the Bateses have to plan for her wedding too.

A light dessert reception consists of non-alcoholic punch (usually sweet enough to make you want to hurl), wedding cake, many cup cakes and lots of cookies, optional mixed nuts, and non-optional mints.

Woe betide you if you forget the mints!

Actually a light dessert reception sounds like a good solution in terms of containing wedding costs and I suspect Alyssa and John will have a good number of people attending though probably nothing in comparison to Erin's wedding.

Not to get OT, Palimpsest, I didn't have a really big wedding but still wish I eloped nearly 30 years later simple because of all the stress and nonsense.

[justmissedquiver]

That being said, I learned that the hard way by decorating my first house in a way that made it look like a Middle Eastern acid trip...

:lol: you and me both sister! but it was really fun to do and to watch people :pink-shock: was totally worth it.

[nausicaa]

Oh my gosh, I hate food snob-ism, but when it comes to Weddings my inner food-snob reaches the height of a skyscraper. Holy Moly, bologna on a stick, light dessert, chicken salad, got-hard cake...these fundies never seize to amaze me with their tackiness.

Where I come from, the church wedding / civil marriage is followed by a sparkling wine reception (either in front/at church or at restaurant/party room) followed by a reception (at a restaurant) that serves a gigantic load of delicious cakes, a several course dinner and dessert. Open bar throughout the whole thing. Appropriate music and classical dancing (waltz, etc. ). In order to save a bit of money people will often decide to invite their not so close friends partially, either for cake'n'wine or dinner. It's not considered tacky or anything.

When it comes to weddings I know I should say that it's the bride and groom's day and that they are to decide how their wedding should be like.

But I'm a wedding SNOB. Sorry.

I'm just a snob in general, so no need to apologize to me :)

I actually get having a dessert reception or just cake and punch if you need to cut costs or aren't into the big white wedding thing in general (I fully plan on eloping if any man is ever unfortunate enough to tumble into my snares), but something about having such a HUGE wedding and then cutting costs by underfeeding tguests sits uneasily with me. Some of those people are traveling a long way.

It can't help but feel like a gift grab. I noticed none of the brides want to cut costs on their stuff (dress, hair, bridesmaids, flowers, day long photography), just what their guests receive. Then again when you're in the Quiverfull movement, a small wedding is sort of an impossibility. I'm still undecided on all of this.