List of Unmarried Fundies

[usedbicycle]

I apologize in advance for such a petty comment, but poor Daniel Staddon's pants are extremely ill-fitting and he has a wet stain on his pant leg. He could have done better for his official courtship photos.

Ok I'll stop being mean. They do look very happy and Kathryn is a beauty. All the Neely girls have a very "mariage-able" air to them, they're pretty yet modest and humble, the whole package for a fundy guy!

[hollyandivy]

22 minutes ago, usedbicycle said:

I apologize in advance for such a petty comment, but poor Daniel Staddon's pants are extremely ill-fitting and he has a wet stain on his pant leg. He could have done better for his official courtship photos.

Ok I'll stop being mean. They do look very happy and Kathryn is a beauty. All the Neely girls have a very "mariage-able" air to them, they're pretty yet modest and humble, the whole package for a fundy guy!

I think the stain is from getting down on one knee where the grass was wet..... And I was thinking exactly the same thing when I looked at the photos!

[divadivine]

3 hours ago, hollyandivy said:

I think the stain is from getting down on one knee where the grass was wet..... And I was thinking exactly the same thing when I looked at the photos!

I understand why the bride-to-be has flowers, but why does the groom-to-be have a boutonniere? It's not even the same type of flowers as her bouquet. Do they think they're going to the fundie prom? Stopping at Chick-Fil-A for dinner with chaperones in tow and then heading home for an evening of Bible reading and answering questions about each other instead of dancing? 

I'm bad, so off to the prayer closet for me! 

[usedbicycle]

On 3/6/2016 at 2:33 PM, hollyandivy said:

I think the stain is from getting down on one knee where the grass was wet..... And I was thinking exactly the same thing when I looked at the photos!

You're right, this ain't just a courtship, they're engaged! I had to reeeeaaally zoom in to see a ring. And what must be her purity ring on her other hand. 

[HereticHick]

Does Daniel Staddon work at the Gothard mothership in Oak Brook? I can't keep all the Staddons straight.  So will he and his bride be setting up housekeeping in the Big Sandy Fundy Colony?

[maple802]

10 hours ago, HereticHick said:

Does Daniel Staddon work at the Gothard mothership in Oak Brook? I can't keep all the Staddons straight.  So will he and his bride be setting up housekeeping in the Big Sandy Fundy Colony?

IIRC, he does work for the "ministry" -- at least it has appeared that way in Esther's posts on the family website and on some of Robert & Kendalyn's posts.  I'd be willing to bet money that they'll be setting up their homestead with the other Big Sandy colonists.

[HereticHick]

13 hours ago, maple802 said:

IIRC, he does work for the "ministry" -- at least it has appeared that way in Esther's posts on the family website and on some of Robert & Kendalyn's posts.  I'd be willing to bet money that they'll be setting up their homestead with the other Big Sandy colonists.

Perhaps poor "spinster" Esther will be stuck living with Robert or Daniel--maybe she will be passed back and forth whenever there is a new blessing to take care of.

[hollyandivy]

Wasn't Esther courting someone? Or is my brain playing tricks on me?

[teachergirl]

no I don't think Esther has courted anyone, she is pushing 30 I believe.

[hollyandivy]

Who the heck was it then? Man I'm getting old....

[teachergirl]

maybe the Girotti sister ( Hannah) I think, who just got married this fall after a very brief courtship....they look similar!

[hollyandivy]

We went out for dinner tonight and in the middle of it I finally remembered: it was Tabitha Paine.  i know it's pathetic to think about it when you are out with your family but it really bugs me when  i can't remember things.

[OodOnTheLoo]

I keep checking because I keep rooting for the guys, but still no Arndt engagements.  

[ophelia]

I don't see any of them ever getting engaged, but hopefully I'm wrong.

[tamster59]

On 3/11/2016 at 5:45 PM, teachergirl said:

maybe the Girotti sister ( Hannah) I think, who just got married this fall after a very brief courtship....they look similar!

Sarah was the one who married last fall.She met her husband in may,engaged in September,married in November and now a baby in August.

[ophelia]

12 hours ago, tamster59 said:

Sarah was the one who married last fall.She met her husband in may,engaged in September,married in November and now a baby in August.

That escalated quickly.

[HereticHick]

Lordy-- fundy written English is so stilted and awkward. The Staddon Family just posted a followup video to the announcement of Daniel & Kathryn Neely's engagement. It is titled: "In light of recent events, we thought others would like to learn a little more about Daniel..."

 

To me, the "In light of recent events" is a phrase used to announce actions taken in response to some awful tragedy/scandal  (perhaps something really icky that you don't want to mention).  As in:

"In light of recent events, our vacation is Syria is postponed"  or "In light of recent events, Josh Duggar has resigned from the Family Research Council"  or "In light of recent events, I will never ever stay in a Trump Hotel"

[jakesykora]

12 hours ago, HereticHick said:

 

Lordy-- fundy written English is so stilted and awkward. The Staddon Family just posted a followup video to the announcement of Daniel & Kathryn Neely's engagement. It is titled: "In light of recent events, we thought others would like to learn a little more about Daniel..."

To me, the "In light of recent events" is a phrase used to announce actions taken in response to some awful tragedy/scandal  (perhaps something really icky that you don't want to mention).  As in:

"In light of recent events, our vacation is Syria is postponed"  or "In light of recent events, Josh Duggar has resigned from the Family Research Council"  or "In light of recent events, I will never ever stay in a Trump Hotel"

I found the phrasing odd as well, but probably in part for another reason (though I can see your take on it, for sure, also)

I read it and then scrolled up twice thinking surely it was HER family's blog posting that not the Staddon family, as if the video were intended to sort of 'introduce' their blog readers to the soon-to-be-new-addition-to-the-family.

When I realized no, I wasn't nuts, it really was the Staddon blog basically using this video as if 'introducing' their own child, presumably someone most of their readers had some familiarity with, and not the soon-to-be-DIL's family posting it, it was all the more awkward to me.

Then the phrasing (and the video) almost seemed more like something they may have actually created and used to "sell" Kathryn's family (or others) on Daniel being a 'suitable' candidate/potential courtship partner and now are just sharing it on the blog.

[nickelodeon]

That's freaky! The Neelys are at the "Joyful Daughters" conference this weekend singing balefully. Bet the whole time Kathryn is thinking "see ya later and stay salty, single people."

[HereticHick]

I'm sure that Kathryn is superduper thrilled that her betrothed's workplace just lost an evangelical accreditation: http://www.christianitytoday.com/gleanings/2016/march/bill-gothard-iblp-loses-ecfa-accreditation-governance.html

Bill Gothard’s former ministry has lost its seal of approval from the leading group that sets the standards for evangelical ministries.

The Evangelical Council for Financial Accountability (ECFA) terminated the membership of the Institute in Basic Life Principles (IBLP) last Friday, citing “failure to comply” with its governance standard.

ECFA requires member organizations to have a board of at least five people (mostly independents) that pray, chart long-range strategy, and identify potential conflicts of interest, among examples of other duties.

“When a ministry encounters failure—or even worse, scandal—its difficulties can almost always be traced to a breakdown in governance,” states ECFA’s explanationof Standard 2. “For this reason, ECFA places much emphasis on strong, effective governance.”...

[uber frau]

What is that particular accreditation worth(from an outside, sceptical POV, I mean)?

How long has IBLP/ATI held that accreditation(it has had a board of puppets for a long time)& why did it take ECFA so long to delist them?

[hollyandivy]

4 hours ago, uber frau said:

why did it take ECFA so long to delist them?

That is what I would like to know!

[ladyamylynn]

Anybody else remember Lina and Taliban Tony? It looks like he has a new girlfriend... Paulina remains single and devoutly Catholic (in her own words). 

[jakesykora]

The eldest Boyer sister - Jessica - who got engaged a few months back is no longer engaged to the guy, Levi (the one who had friends that things were hinting might be potential match(es) for her sister(s))

Though she'd been continuing blogging the story it seemed like something might be up in blog posts, especially when they took a blogging break, and it was confirmed today:

There's much (much) more to the blog post but here are some parts that stood out to me - in large part because of the difference in how much she's acknowledged of the impact, struggles, mistakes, etc. from previous fundie courtships or engagements we've seen called off or otherwise end.
 

Quote

 

We ran into some difficulties in our relationship not long after the engagement began, and things just seemed to go down hill from there. Ultimately, both Levi and I realized that there had been some miscommunication regarding his life vision, and over the course of time Levi realized that his lifestyle would not be a good fit for me to be his helpmeet. There has been more heartbreak on my side than I ever let anyone know during the last few months, so if this comes as a surprise to you, just know that I have been working through these difficulties with Levi and my family for a long time now, and God was preparing my heart for the ending of our engagement a while ago. To move out of engagement and into a marriage with Levi was not the Lord’s plan in the end. Thank you for your prayers in all of this. Though you were praying for a different scenario, one prayer that was answered is “the Lord’s Will be done.” Your prayers helped me when things were not going well, and believe me, there were days when I didn’t want to get up out of bed to face another day; times when singing was impossible, and smiles and laughter seemed to elude my life altogether and became a thing of the past. But now, at this point in time, be assured our loving Heavenly Father is faithfully mending my heart. I won’t lie, it is still a process that will take a long while.

<snip>

There is a sunny side! Really though? With all those storm clouds overhead? I just can’t find it. But there is. And I’ve found my sunshine. The two things that pull the corners of my mouth up into a smile is: 1) that I have been spared by the Lord’s mercy from a life less desirable than what I am willing to have, and 2) that all throughout the engagement, everything I did in my relationship with Levi, I did with my all, and then some. At first, I thought this was a terrible thing to have done–to give up your first love to someone who wasn’t meant for you in the end. That is what tore me up inside the most at first, until my Dad, and some very good friends, explained to me that giving up that part of yourself for a truly righteous and wonderful end goal, wasn’t anything to be ashamed of. Yes, I have given up my first love, and a first anything is very precious and so it is most painful to let go. I will have a scar where that wound is healing for the rest of my life. But that scar is to remind me that I did not fail. I actually succeeded… my family, with me, succeeded. How? We succeeded together because the mistakes we made in this relationship will never occur again. I succeeded because I gained a whole new perspective on the reality of love–what it is like to love, what it is like to be loved, what it is like to not be loved. Because of this relationship, I have shed the girlhood fancies and dreams I once had, and have been shown reality. Loving is hard work, and only the bravest of the brave can open themselves up in vulnerability to learn how to love and be loved by another. No. I can never return to being the naive girl I once was. I can never take the same path I have just left behind. The pain is too great to be so foolish.

 

We don't see many say much in the wake of failed courtships or called off engagements in the fundie world, particularly not about the hurt, so it's actually kind of refreshing, to me, to see her admitting some of the difficulty of it and NOT acting like it's such a non-thing as others have.

Quote

The blow has indeed come. It has rocked me to my core. I have opened up, been turned away, and am being sewn back up by God’s careful hand. But, in all of this I truly believe He saved me from a life that could have potentially been very, very hard. And for those reasons, I am able to come out of this smiling, mostly happy, and mending. The best thing though is “Mr. Right” has yet to come knocking at my garden gate, AND… there is still a bright future ahead of me with my two gold-winning sisters and my rock-solid Dad and Mom.

Nor do we see many acknowledge things they wish they had done differently or may have handled better:

Quote

And I did make several mistakes. The three that weigh on me the most are these: 1) I was impatient, and didn’t let time pass in order for key things to manifest themselves–such as allowing a better friendship with Levi to grow before moving into an engagement. 2) I was too trusting in love, and too careless with the things that could have made, but eventually broke up, our relationship–such as giving Levi the benefit of the doubt concerning how he planned to represent Christ to me, and then being okay with other things that were less than satisfactory, giving him the impression that that was how I wanted things to be handled, or how I wanted to be treated, when in fact that was not true. 3) I gave up too many things that made up who I was as a person, which was misleading for Levi, and very dangerous for myself, making me very unhappy.

Anyway, surprising to see on several fronts, IMO, from past such acknowledgements in other relationships ending (and it really is VERY lengthy and the above are small snippets compared to the rest).

http://boyerfamilysingersblog.com/2016/03/unexpected-journey-unexpected-ending/

 

[ladyamylynn]

And what could have been a normal teenage breakup is instead a genuine heartbreak and a broken engagement. Guarding their children's hearts, indeed.