A naked wife who smiles a lot (holy Christ)

[GeoBQn]

I think Lori Alexander is a Fucking Monster is now officially screwing with us. Her latest post is one long quote from Sunshine Mary.

lorialexander.blogspot.com/2013/06/sunshine-marys-advice.html

[Pearl]

I don't know a lot about history. But, doesn't this ideal come from the Cult of Womanhood in the 1800s? And, didn't men have to go and pay mistresses to have the intellectual conversations that they wanted? I think that this idea of smiling, beautiful, always obedient wife has been thoroughly debunked. I wouldn't be surprised if Ken was getting something on the side.

[snarkyjan]

I don't know a lot about history. But, doesn't this ideal come from the Cult of Womanhood in the 1800s? And, didn't men have to go and pay mistresses to have the intellectual conversations that they wanted? I think that this idea of smiling, beautiful, always obedient wife has been thoroughly debunked. I wouldn't be surprised if Ken was getting something on the side.

This kind of nonsense goes clear back to the ancient Greeks. Even aristocratic wives were expected to be rarely seen and never heard from. When a bunch of the boys wanted to discuss life, the universe and everything at a banquet, they brought their mistresses. Or they hired hetairas, who not only could but were expected to hold their own in an intelligent conversation.

[Koala]

And yet another post silently screaming, "I hate Ken and my life is miserable!"

[dilannsmom]

Lori's reply to a commenter's question:

We never poop or toot in front of each other. I put my makeup on in front of him and brush my teeth. I think it is good to be as feminine and proper around your husband as you can...except in the bed!/quote]

Um--if I can't fart, I mean "toot," in front of my man then he isn't the man for me! Seriously? I'm supposed to get naked any time he asks, but close the door to "poop"? She is a whack job!

[GeoBQn]

Here's a comment from the Sunshine Mary post:

Lindsay Harold

Very true. If you want the best for your children, pick a good man, and then stick by him no matter what. Your children need a father at least as much as they need a mother. And for their spiritual health, a father who is there and will teach them about God is irreplaceable. Studies have shown that it is the father, not the mother, who has the greatest influence on the faith of the children.

Bullshit. Studies show that women participate in religion in higher percentages than men. According to Lori and her followers, women are supposed to spend every waking moment with their children and have no lives outside of the house. And yet, they believe that fathers have the greatest influence over the religious beliefs of the children?

I was raised kosher because that's what my mom wanted, not my dad. I spent every holiday with my mom's side of the family, not my dad's because he wasn't close with his extended family. My aunt was the one who lead all of the home-based Jewish rituals, from Shabbat kiddush to seders. If my brother and male cousins have any identification with Judaism now, it's because of my Bubbe's weekly Shabbat dinners. It's not that the men didn't care about being Jewish, but the women in my family were always the driving force of it.

[Jinger Jar]

Lori's reply to a commenter's question:

My husband's first wife was squeamish about the poopin' and the tootin'. Even on cold nights, she'd get out of bed and run into the other room to fart. She also had a conniption the first time my husband used the toilet while she was showering. And guess what? *That* marriage didn't make it 10 years. :nenner:

[Koala]

I don't know where Ken was when Lori gave birth, but that took the mystery right out of it for my husband. That and having to wake me up in the middle of the night to give me progesterone while I was pregnant. Let's put it this way - it wasn't oral and it wasn't pleasant.

God, I couldn't imagine where we'd be if we weren't comfortable around each other. Sounds like a miserable way to live.

[SomewhatFundy]

Her philosophy is all about putting your husband's pleasure first and your own needs and wants last. The problem is, it will never be enough. You will torture yourself dieting, changing your style, putting on makeup, 'giving him sex', smiling till your face hurts, cooking the most delicious meals... and there will always be someone who does it better. There will always be women out there who are prettier and thinner, who are more stylish, younger, nicer, more submissive, more fertile, healthier, holier, better at sex, better at cooking... always. If your relationship with your husband is based on how much you can do for him, rather than on mutual love and respect, you are setting yourself up for failure and misery.

I LOVE this post. Especially because it made me realize that Lori doesn't have the biblical model of marriage that she swears up and down that she does.

I was always taught that a Christian marriage was supposed to be a reflection of the relationship between Christ and the church. You can't earn Christ's love for you by good works. Rather, it is through faith people are "saved". God loves people regardless of their flaws, and the people that love God do good works BECAUSE of that love. A Christian marriage is intended to mirror that.

Lori doesn't do nice things for her husband because she loves him, she does nice things to earn his love and affection. Her entire marriage is based upon works, rather than faith that her husband loves her unconditionally. Doesn't sound like a biblical marriage to me. Then she has the gall to tell other people how shitty their marriages are because they aren't like hers.

How amusing.

[Carla Bruni]

Yep, definitely sounds like Lori is a Fucking Monster hates her life. On that note, I can't imagine how miserable it must be to be married to (or be in a relationship with) somebody whose sexual rhythms are so out of whack with yours that you have to devote oodles of blog posts to convincing yourself (and we all know she's mostly trying to convince herself) that you must continue to put out against your will in order to make him stay.

Don't you want to be banging somebody with whom you have better rapport in the bedroom department, Lori (is a Fucking Monster)? I'm sorry (not really) that you happen to be the butt of jokes on a forum full of socially and sexually liberated women who clearly have happier sex lives than you do :wink-kitty:

It's SO bizarre to me that these idiots NEVER mention the wife initiating sex; it's all about "always being ready" to accept the sacred headship peen, but never about pursuing it yourself. Are they really that disgusted by their husbands that they have to grit their teeth and think of what Jesus would want them to do every time? That's just sad. Sex is so much more fun when you actually, you know, LIKE it.