Lori-Respect your husband even when he's being a dick

[ILoveJellybeans]

10 is way too old to be doing stuff like that, theyre old enough to understand empathy and know that hurting animals isnt funny. Is this kid some kind of psychopath or something???

And how does that relate to marriage? That if your being abused by your partner, stay submissive and look sad a lot and their heart will melt for you and they will feel sorry and love you again? Cause that doesnt work, abusers generally like making people upset.

[GeoBQn]

WTF at this reply.

I seriously want to punch this person in the face.

I replied: If you were my child I would have pushed you down a hill three times and see if you liked it as much as your poor dog. And if this is just an metaphor, you a poor excuse of a human being thinking that this makes sense. Seriously, you need help you psycho.

But it will probably get deleted but I couldn't help myself. :evil:

The All-Knowing Lori disagrees with you:

Lori Alexander · 1 hour ago

Precious! It brought tears to my eyes. I may make this into a post. Thank you.

Not surprised that she believes both women and animals deserve no respect.

[turquoise]

The All-Knowing Lori disagrees with you:

Not surprised that she believes both women and animals deserve no respect.

It makes me want to cry too, but not for the reason Lori does. That poor dog! The story isn't precious, it's horrifying.

[Olive Plant]

I've wondered if some of the things she writes are some sort of passive-aggressive or even subconscious attempt to paint Ken as a complete asshole.

I get a really passive-aggressive vibe from her, especially in posts like this. Smile and pretend like it didn't happen, humming in a sunny way, la la la la la. When I was married to a patriarchial jerk I would do this just to make the point that he didn't really want submission, either. You can be "submissive" in a very "fuck you, I'm going to be righteous and let my superior LOVE OF CHRIST SHINE THROUGH ME WITHOUT A WORD" way.

[Childless]

I'm sorry, but I'm no one's doormat. If wrongly accused, I will stand up for myself. That doesn't mean I scream and rant and stalk off. It means I bring proof of my innocence and let my spouse know that I won't put up with the blame game. If he wants to accuse me of something, he needs to bring proof to the table also and then calmly ask me why I did what I did. Perhaps there's a logical explanation for what happened. I would think that any person would want to ask questions before blaming someone and looking like a complete idiot when they find out they were either wrong or there was a reason why someone did what they did.

[Bloo]

That dog story is fucking sick. I wouldn't expect that lack of empathy from my developmentally delayed four year olds, much less a neurotypical ten year old.

I "won" my husband when we were dating; marriage was one of the spoils. Funnily enough, he thinks he "won" me and TREATS ME LIKE THE PRIZE I AM.

[Jinger Jar]

I've wondered if some of the things she writes are some sort of passive-aggressive or even subconscious attempt to paint Ken as a complete asshole.

Absolutely. I said this on another thread about Lori. I think Ken's trampled on her for decades, and I think her blog is one of the very few safe spaces she has to vent about it. She can't come out and say she's being treated like a turd and this has been going on for years, because that would undermine everything she's been advocating all this time and heaven only knows what Ken would do to her, but nothing's stopping her from getting all kinds of letters from readers about their brutish husbands and plastering their misdeeds all over her blog. ;)

[Claddagh]

The dog story is horrifying! It makes me feel ill that Lori actually thinks it's great and wants to turn it into a post! :evil:

ETA:

The comment will never see the light of day but this is what I wrote. I very rarely ever post on fundie blogs but the comments about the poor dog really pissed me off.

That story is NOT precious! It's wrong to torment a poor animal and a person!

It's SICK that you would want to turn this into a positive story/post, Lori!

[salex]

The dog story is horrifying! It makes me feel ill that Lori actually thinks it's great and wants to turn it into a post! :evil:

Will she also include one where the kids toss he dog down the hill until it is hurt or killed, or finally just kill it with a limb? Because that is as likely in this situation as this big pity on the dog thing.

[Claddagh]

Will she also include one where the kids toss he dog down the hill until it is hurt or killed, or finally just kill it with a limb? Because that is as likely in this situation as this big pity on the dog thing.

One of the stories Dad told me when I was a kid was when he was eight he was curious and took a baby quail from its nest. He feared the mother would reject it so he took it home and wanted to help it and raise it into a full grown bird. Sadly the baby bird died and he went to his mother, cursing his curiousity and foolishness. He expected her to be furious with him but instead she comforted him.

Dad is now 61 and he says he sometimes still feels horrible about what he did. He can't imagine intentionally hurting or tormenting an animal.

[Full enough quiver]

How about respecting your husband because he is a good husband and human being, and he respects you because yo are a good wife and human being. And then, when he occasionally acts like a dick, because he's human and has a bad day, and I can be a bitch sometimes too, you calmly let him know it's not ok to treat you that way, then go about your business. This approach has never failed to produce a loving apology from my husband. And it works both ways. Sometimes I have to eat humble pie and admit I'm wrong. A lot of my friends think I'm submissive. I work two days a week (to keep up my skills as a lvn) I stay home, cook, clean, do laundry, and my husband makes most of the major decisions. However, he would never make a major decision without consulting me and taking my opinion into account. The line in the bible right after "wives submit to your husbands" is "husbands, love your wives as Christ loved the church". I take this to mean that husbands need to have their wives best interests in mind, and make decisions accordingly. Sounds like Lori's headship hasn't been reading his bible. Nowhere in there does it say the wife has to be a doormat, and never gets to respectfully disagree with her husband.

[salex]

One of the stories Dad told me when I was a kid was when he was eight he was curious and took a baby quail from its nest. He feared the mother would reject it so he took it home and wanted to help it and raise it into a full grown bird. Sadly the baby bird died and he went to his mother, cursing his curiousity and foolishness. He expected her to be furious with him but instead she comforted him.

Dad is now 61 and he says he sometimes still feels horrible about what he did. He can't imagine intentionally hurting or tormenting an animal.

My dad has a similar story. My family has many farmers, and my grandfather would get off the tractor when mowing a pasture and move a bird nest to safety to avoid mowing it, or go around it. Your dad, and mine, didn't torture the birds, they accidently killed them.

But the story she featured had them torturing the dog, repeatedly, as an example that if the woman keeps meekly taking abuse, the husband will eventually stop torturing her. I am unconvinced an adult man who seeks out a doormat/submissive and purposely tortures her will stop--I suspect he may make it more intense, since "no reaction" may not be what he was going for.

I guess I've read too many news stories about people who seem to have no limits in their sadism.... and this lori and her husband creep me out

[quincygal]

OK, I read Lori's initial post & had to go outside & shovel our huge driveway. I was so upset that I had the energy to do it quickly. Now I log back on & see this dog story. Now I wanna puke up the girl scout cookies I just ate.

sick

[Arete]

OK, I read Lori's initial post & had to go outside & shovel our huge driveway. I was so upset that I had the energy to do it quickly. Now I log back on & see this dog story. Now I wanna puke up the girl scout cookies I just ate.

sick

I've learned that I can only read some of these bloggers on an empty stomach, especially Lori. She can really put a person off their feed.

[quincygal]

I've learned that I can only read some of these bloggers on an empty stomach, especially Lori. She can really put a person off their feed.

Dude! You're right!!! Good idea:)

[kpmom]

OK, I read Lori's initial post & had to go outside & shovel our huge driveway. I was so upset that I had the energy to do it quickly. Now I log back on & see this dog story. Now I wanna puke up the girl scout cookies I just ate.

sick

Keep reading this woman's blog and you'll have the energy to shovel all your neighbor's driveways too. She's a piece of work all right.

And that "dog" commentor should be pushed down a hill himself. What was the point of that story? That abused women should just keep coming back until dh bursts into tears and vows never to hurt her again? Yeah, there are graveyards full of women who believed that.

[GeoBQn]

I told my husband about this blog post. He responded thusly: "Well, if the husband is accusing you of something, and according to Lori the husband is always right, then clearly you actually did what he is accusing you of and you should apologize by having his children. And baking him a pie--his favorite pie, which you should already know without asking. And making his favorite cut of meat, which should be in your fridge 24/7 just in case."

[AnywhereButHere]

Does anyone think that at least some of Lori's physical ailments could be psychosomatic? Her inner distress over the way she's treated at home, coming out in sickness and pains? She seems to frequently mention problems she's having.

[Hisey]

Yes, I have definitely thought that. After all, she can't submit to Ken if she is lying in bed in pain. This lets her off the hook, and surely god understands this.

[Arete]

Yes, I have definitely thought that. After all, she can't submit to Ken if she is lying in bed in pain. This lets her off the hook, and surely god understands this.

As twisted as Lori is, I wouldn't be surprised if she made it a point to submit while in pain, as she probably thinks suffering in the sack is the crowning glory of Christian womanhood. :roll:

As for Ken, he probably gets off having his wife "submit" in pain. What a tool. :hand:

[Lillybee]

I wonder how this bitch will react if she ever finds out that one of the women who followed her advice was killed by her abusive husband.

[lilwriter85]

I wonder how this bitch will react if she ever finds out that one of the women who followed her advice was killed by her abusive husband.

I wonder about that too. But I can see Lori blaming the wife as she usually does in many situations. I get a bad feeling that there will be some kind of tragedy to Lori and Ken and their dangerous advice. There are too many red flags that have been revealed on the blog. I think it was either Lori or Ken that said something in the comments against women's shelters. The incident with Lori telling a pregnant woman to please her husband sexually even though a doctor advised against it was very telling. On the family front, Lori proudly talked about how her daughter got rid of clothes that her son-in-law didn't like. The clothes thing creeped me out a bit because I have heard of several abuse cases in which the abusive husband controls every little thing the wife does. I wouldn't be surprised if a tragedy involving one of the daughters happens.

[Trynn]

There are ways to still respect your husband when he's bein a jerk. Of course, If it happens too regularly you've got bigger problems, but still.

[MarsGirl]

That story of the dog made me sick. Anyone who would hurt an animal like that has serious issues. ESPECIALLY when it's so trusting of you and loving!!! :( That makes me so angry. And what a crappy metaphor. What as the point of that? To make the dog prove its loyalty?? Is that poster suggesting a man should make a woman prove her loyalty? How sick.

[lilwriter85]

That story of the dog made me sick. Anyone who would hurt an animal like that has serious issues. ESPECIALLY when it's so trusting of you and loving!!! :( That makes me so angry. And what a crappy metaphor. What as the point of that? To make the dog prove its loyalty?? Is that poster suggesting a man should make a woman prove her loyalty? How sick.

I was also thinking the same thing.