ONOEZ! Not WITCHES!!!

[JesusFightClub]

Witches terrorise Wales. Allegedly.

 

And you thought only the US had mad fundies.

 

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article ... craft.html

[docmom]

It's the Daily Mail- it must be true!

[JesusFightClub]

Even for the Fail, that is utterly mad. :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

[snarkyjan]

Witches terrorise Wales. Allegedly.

And you thought only the US had mad fundies.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article ... craft.html

Somebody needs to confiscate their copies of "Discovery Of Witches" by Matthew Hopkins

[Dollypeeps]

The Daily Fail at its best but it was funny I have to say.

[JesusFightClub]

I liked the bit where he could tell she was a witch because she praised the baby "in an extremely false and patronising way". Because, er, no-one ever lies and tells a new mum a baby's gorgeous when it blatantly isn't, EXCEPT FOR TEH WITCHES :lol:

[Dollypeeps]

Even for the Fail, that is utterly mad. :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

Utterly mad, the mail must be having a slow day

[JesusFightClub]

Every day's a slow day in Failworld.

I also love the fact the witches are "self prescribed" not "self described". What can they be prescribing themselves? In other great mysteries of the earth, why did the Fail sack all its subs?

[Aisling]

‘It’s an alarming figure, and there are indications that there are a lot more who wouldn’t confess to being witches,’ says the Reverend Dr Felix Aubel, 52

They WON'T CONFESS?

Right, I'll get the thumb screws and you get the big pointy retractable needle. We'll have a good old hoke for the nipple that the Devil sucks blood from.

Witches in Broken Britain. WhyOhWhy did they ever take the cane out of classrooms?

[JesusFightClub]

It's all the fault of immigrunts. Or yuman rites. Or elf 'n' safety.

[snarkyjan]

I liked the bit where he could tell she was a witch because she praised the baby "in an extremely false and patronising way". Because, er, no-one ever lies and tells a new mum a baby's gorgeous when it blatantly isn't, EXCEPT FOR TEH WITCHES :lol:

It couldn't POSSIBLY be because no-one had the heart to tell the parents that their baby looked like Gollum after he fell into the Fire of Doom, could it now?

[rosamundi]

My life is much calmer now I've installed Kittenblocker. Instead of the Daily Heil doing hideous things to my blood pressure, I get a picture of a cup of tea, and a picture of a kitten.

[JesusFightClub]

But you do miss some comedy gold :D as well as that "know your enemy" vibe :lol:

[Aisling]

They are probably single mother, benefit scrounging witches who show their cleavage too.

Shocking. ItWasn'tLikeThisInMyDay ™.

[PennySycamore]

It couldn't POSSIBLY be because no-one had the heart to tell the parents that their baby looked like Gollum after he fell into the Fire of Doom, could it now?

One of my youngest daughter's old high school friends just had a baby. My god, is that baby ugly! It does resemble Gollum a bit. I'm glad that I probably won't be put in the situation of ever meeting that unfortunate child and having to lie about its looks or even worse, telling the mom the truth.

[meda]

That was the funniest thing I have read since the National Enquirer found Elvis ( again).

[kiwimusume]

My life is much calmer now I've installed Kittenblocker. Instead of the Daily Heil doing hideous things to my blood pressure, I get a picture of a cup of tea, and a picture of a kitten.

Whoever came up with that is a genius. :D

[Sobeknofret]

I knew I loved Wales for a good reason. :D

[JesusFightClub]

Sobeknofret, just for you, some Welsh witches (yesterday) :lol:

http://folkcostume.blogspot.co.uk/2011/ ... shire.html

no breaking linkey, don't think he will mind (and it's a fascinating read)

[Artemis]

There have always been witches on the Somerset Levels.

A childhood memory: waiting in a car outside a pub near Langport (Grandma and Grandad were IN the pub for a quick pint) with my packet of crisps, early one evening. Seeing a tall figure in a long black hooded cloak, walking a black goat on a lead along the darkening road.

Also, every so often round here, we have a spate of black cats going missing.

[penguinagogo]

https://twitter.com/WelshDalaiLama/status/273005092045725696/photo/1/large

[JesusFightClub]

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: Yes, it is true!

Everyone I know tells me not to. But it's like a scab you keep on picking at. You know it's stupid, the covering over the wound is there for a reason and you're just going to cause scarring, yet it is irresistible temptation.

I also have another agenda, but it's secret....

I'm convinced one day I will find them out in such an egregious breach of the guidelines laid down by the Press Complaints Commission that like the News of the Screws, they will be forced to fold in shame. And people will dance in the streets. ;)

[Sobeknofret]

Very cool! I love historical textiles and folk costuming, so this is a great read for me. Thanks JFC! :D

[moodygirl86]

You know what I'd do with the Daily Seig Heil? Wipe my arse with it!

[RachelB]

I liked the bit where he could tell she was a witch because she praised the baby "in an extremely false and patronising way". Because, er, no-one ever lies and tells a new mum a baby's gorgeous when it blatantly isn't, EXCEPT FOR TEH WITCHES :lol:

I told my brother that his eldest child looked like Yoda and his middle child like Winston Churchill, but we are like that. (Both have grown out of it.) I would not say such a thing to most parents of newborns, even if it were true.