Trans Quiverfull Dads? MERGED

[ncb]

Yet another tragic outcome of never being allowed to explore anything but the most rigid gender and sex roles:

 

http://jezebel.com/5905780/what-happens ... es-a-woman

[SweetTexasCrude]

Saw this on Jezebel: http://jezebel.com/5905780/what-happens ... es-a-woman

Here's the family's blog: http://ayoungmomsmusings.blogspot.com [since she's ex-QF I think it's ok to leave the link intact]. Is anyone familiar with her?

Good for her family for sticking together and finding happiness without the fundie church!

[ncb]

I only mean this is tragic in the sense that they had to struggle so much for self-acceptance. How they resolved it as a couple is lovely!

[atheistjd]

Yet another tragic outcome of never being allowed to explore anything but the most rigid gender and sex roles:

http://jezebel.com/5905780/what-happens ... es-a-woman

Wow, what an AMAZING story. I am literally beaming right now because of how their story turned out and so happy for them... I really wish them all the best. Thank goodness they didn't follow the "suppress all bad feelings and thoughts forever" - it is clear that their openness in communication (as well as some luck acceptance) really enabled them to find happiness. I wish them all the best.

:banana-rainbow: (this smiley seemed appropriate somehow)

[Dark Matters]

I read her whole series of posts on this subject and am awed by her and her spouse's love, respect and acceptance of each other.

[geniebelle6901]

I'm scratching my head on this one. Aren't most Quiverfull families fundie, fundie-lite, or at least very conservative Christian who tend to believe that being transgendered is is a sin? Not saying I agree with that train of thought, because I don't. There's anything wrong with transgendered people/couples having children. It's just that Quiverfull & transgendered aren't 2 words I would ever think to hear in the same sentence. Obviously I need to do some reading on the subject.

[mirele]

I'm scratching my head on this one. Aren't most Quiverfull families fundie, fundie-lite, or at least very conservative Christian who tend to believe that being transgendered is is a sin? Not saying I agree with that train of thought, because I don't. There's anything wrong with transgendered people/couples having children. It's just that Quiverfull & transgendered aren't 2 words I would ever think to hear in the same sentence. Obviously I need to do some reading on the subject.

I think the confusion arises from the fact that the parents in this family were raised Quiverfull, went through the whole courtship thing (rather short) and then got married. Then they slowly came out to each other. But in the process, they're having to undo a lot of programming they got from their upbringings.

[Rosa]

I love Melissa (that blogger) and her older posts about stopping spanking and questioning her faith were just beautiful, too. I'm so glad her story is getting so much attention, because it's really beautiful.

[MonkeyMomma]

I love Melissa (that blogger) and her older posts about stopping spanking and questioning her faith were just beautiful, too. I'm so glad her story is getting so much attention, because it's really beautiful.

Same here! There's so much healing and love in that series she published. I know she considers herself agnostic these days, but I think they are a shining example to all Christians.

[Anise]

I was considering posting her story here, but I wasn't sure whether I ought to since it's more of a "yay!" and no snark. I think it's really inspiring how close they were all throughout the process. It's a really beautiful story.

[Glass Cowcatcher]

Awesome story and I'm glad these to had the balls ( so to speak) to outright leave the church instead of trying to fit in.

Also, why do fundies not see the contradiction here?

he was an aggressive gay! He just wanted his own vagina to play with!

[Rachel333]

I'm reading her blog now. This is a really sweet story.

[browngrl]

This blogger is worth reading. She is a good writer and the story of her journey from fundie hood is very interesting. She seems like a kind person.

[nomi]

Oh wow, I haven't checked her blog in a few weeks because I knew she was moving and all that jazz and hadn't been updating. I cannot believe the newly revealed developments in their lives. I knew something was up when she said they were leaving the church and reading her more recentish posts on her own religious beliefs makes me not surprised at all to see what's going on.

I wish much luck to her and her family.

[slh12280]

She is such a talented writer! I kept waiting and waiting for next installments for that series.

[ilovetchotchkes]

I think its amazing and wonderful that she accepted her partner coming from a background like that!!!!

I hope they a life of much happiness ahead of them!

[geniebelle6901]

Ok, I think I understand now. Melissa is a lesbian (in the closet for most of her life) & her husband confided to her that he felt like he was born in the wrong body. Did he have the surgery? Serious brain fog today. But in the end they still love each other and are raising their family. Good for them. I can see where the kids may be confused, but surely counseling and seeing how much their parents love them and each other will help. Now what their parents and other relatives think. Yeah, I can just imagine the hostility.

[theologygeek]

I'm a little confused. If he was a man trapped in a woman's body, wouldn't he be attracted to men when he became a woman? If he's attracted to men, then this setup isn't going to work and the wife will end up very hurt. A man turning into a lesbian isn't logical. I think. I'm not quite sure. lol

[B5SnowDog]

I'm a little confused. If he was a man trapped in a woman's body, wouldn't he be attracted to men when he became a woman?

Nope. Gender identity isn't locked in to sexual orientation. Transmen or transwomen can be heterosexual, homosexual, bisexual, asexual...

[Alecto]

I'm a little confused. If he was a man trapped in a woman's body, wouldn't he be attracted to men when he became a woman? If he's attracted to men, then this setup isn't going to work and the wife will end up very hurt. A man turning into a lesbian isn't logical. I think. I'm not quite sure. lol

My ex is trans (FtM), and as such I've been exposed to a wide variety of transfolks. Gender identity disorder is COMPLETELY separate from sexual attraction. Transfolks are gay, straight, bi, and everything in between, just like everyone else. It's entirely normal for a MtF transwoman to be a lesbian. Just like it would be normal for her to be bi or straight.

But please, divorce the idea of gender identity and sexual orientation. Two different things completely.

[Anise]

I'm a little confused. If he was a man trapped in a woman's body, wouldn't he be attracted to men when he became a woman? If he's attracted to men, then this setup isn't going to work and the wife will end up very hurt. A man turning into a lesbian isn't logical. I think. I'm not quite sure. lol

Sex, gender, and orientation are independent things. Being a woman (biological and/or social identification) doesn't necessarily entail or is defined by an attraction to men just as being a man doesn't necessarily entail or is defined by an attraction to women. Thus a biologically male person could identity as a woman but not necessarily as a heterosexual woman.

[theologygeek]

My ex is trans (FtM), and as such I've been exposed to a wide variety of transfolks. Gender identity disorder is COMPLETELY separate from sexual attraction. Transfolks are gay, straight, bi, and everything in between, just like everyone else. It's entirely normal for a MtF transwoman to be a lesbian. Just like it would be normal for her to be bi or straight.

But please, divorce the idea of gender identity and sexual orientation. Two different things completely.

Learn something new every day. I never heard of that being discussed, not even from friends who are gay. I only know one person who had an operation to go from male to female, but she likes men.

[lilah]

What an amazing story. I wonder when the skeptics will come out to question it ala razing ruth. 8-)

Ok, I think I understand now. Melissa is a lesbian (in the closet for most of her life) & her husband confided to her that he felt like he was born in the wrong body. Did he have the surgery? Serious brain fog today. But in the end they still love each other and are raising their family. Good for them. I can see where the kids may be confused, but surely counseling and seeing how much their parents love them and each other will help. Now what their parents and other relatives think. Yeah, I can just imagine the hostility.

She didn't get into what medical interventions, (hormones, surgery) if any her wife was doing, prehaps out of respect for privacy.

I've heard the surgery (and actually there are several operations that a mtf can do) is pretty expensive and there's often a long waiting list because only a few doctors will perform it.

[brashchick]

I have been following this young woman's blog for a while, and waited eagerly for each installment of this series. I was busting because I wanted to post about it here, but for some reason I feel incredibly protective of her and her wife and family didn't want to expose her to any of our lurking fundies. (I know, I know, she posts a public blog. I also know she is quite able to hold her own. I am just going into my dotage apparently)

I loved her posts about gently discipline. I love her posts about questioning her faith. I just think she is an amazing woman, and I wish them much happiness and love through the years.