Political Memes, Comics, and other Shenanigans, Part 15

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Ann Telnaes did a wonderful series of cartoons based on yesterday's proceedings:

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"Midnight Mitch"

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I could be wrong as I lost count, but I think Democrats went 0-13 in votes last night/this morning.

Why are the hearings going as late as 2:00 a.m? Why the rush? Originally, Mitch McConnell, who’s acquired the nickname “Midnight Mitch” to go along with “Moscow Mitch” and “Cocaine Mitch,” ruled that the prosecution and defense only had 24 hours, to be presented in two days, for opening arguments. After some Republicans expressed concerns that the rule would make it harder for them to hide the fact they’re helping Trump engage in a coverup, McConnell gave the two sides three days instead of two. Donald Trump’s confusion was how many hours there are in a day (in case you’re a Republican, 24).

This still pushed the trial to go as late as 2:00 a.m. this morning. Keep in mind, a lot of these Senators are extremely old. They’re required to be at their desk, not engage in any conversations, and without any electronic devices. Basically, they’re all doing something in a trial over Donald Trump that Donald Trump could NEVER do.

The biggest arguments have been over witnesses. The Republicans don’t want any. For weeks, we’ve heard that four moderate Republicans may join Democrats in voting for witnesses, but from what we saw last night, that’s not going to happen.

McConnell is hoping Americans don’t pay attention because none of this helps Donald Trump. Proof of that is the fact they don’t want witnesses and Trump’s legal team engaged in spreading huge lies while never arguing for Trump’s “innocence.” Yesterday, Republicans only argued over procedure. Witnesses and documents only prove that Donald Trump is guilty. Guilty of something Republicans spent the past three years telling us was a crime (no collusion), and now are convinced that asking a foreign nation to meddle in our election isn’t a big deal.

Republicans continue to argue that Donald Trump as president (sic) has executive privilege, despite the fact he’s never exercised that during the impeachment. The only privilege Trump has are sycophantic, cowardly Republicans who place cult of personality over country.

McConnell is hoping Americans go to sleep while the trial continues. He already has Republicans sleeping on it.

 

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Ann Telnaes' take on yesterday's proceedings:

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"An Idiot Hides Evidence"

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We know Donald Trump is an idiot. But at times, it’s shocking just how transparent he is.

Often, an idiot reveals himself without an explicit statement. Like when a racist is too stupid to understand that the black-friend defense reveals they’re a racist, which is something every single Trump supporter does. But rarely do you find one who claims you can’t prove they’re a racist because they deleted all their racist comments from Facebook.

Trump does this at times. Like when he says he’s not a racist because there’s his “African-American,” or when he claims he’s innocent of sexually assaulting a woman because she doesn’t meet his standards. Trump is so transparent that his tell-tell is projection. When he accuses someone of something, it’s usually later revealed he’s guilty of the accusation. He often takes on the childish defense of “I’m rubber, you’re glue,” like he did in a debate with Hillary Clinton when she said he’s “Putin’s puppet.” I’ve written it before and I’ll do so again: I’m half expecting the revelation Sniffy was born in Kenya.

Trump’s defense against impeachment hasn’t been that he didn’t do what he’s accused of. Even Bill Clinton admitted his guilt of an affair. Trump never admits he did something wrong and those who support him are expected to follow his lead.

What Donald Trump did with Ukraine was ask a foreign government to help with his reelection. He asked a foreign government to go after a political opponent. He withheld military aid, approved by Congress, in an extortion scheme. Later, he asked China to investigate his political opponent. Donald Trump rephrases it but he’s admitted to all of this. At the very least, you would think he’d say “oops.” But no, we get “It was a perfect phone call.” No, it wasn’t. Now his fellow Republicans and lawyers have to go out and argue it was a “perfect phone call” and that it’s OK for a president to bribe a foreign government and ask them to meddle in an American election. Notice you don’t hear “no collusion” anymore? That’s because collusion is OK now.

Donald Trump’s administration has ignored subpoenas for documents and directed members of the administration not to respond to subpoena requests since the beginning of the impeachment process. While his lawyers and Republicans argue that he has the right to cite executive privilege, he hasn’t done so in this matter. Executive privilege doesn’t cover everything. It covers specific conversations and subjects, not anything and everything.

During Bill Clinton’s impeachment, his administration provided over 90,000 pages of documents. Even Richard Nixon turned over tapes and documents.

Trump said former National Security Adviser John Bolton couldn’t testify because he might reveal how Trump feels about other world leaders. Does it get worse than calling the Canadian Prime Minister “two-faced,” or Denmark’s Prime Minister “Nasty,” or even Kim Jong Un “Little Rocket Man?” That’s really only how executive privilege works if you’re a mean girl in high school.

Trump was probably thinking about how he felt about world leaders, who are often caught on tape making fun of him because he was at an international summit. He was asked how he thought the impeachment trial was going. In his answer, Donald Trump admitted to withholding evidence.

He said, “So, we’re doing very well. I got to watch enough. I thought our team did a very good job. But honestly, we have all the material. They don’t have the material.” And right then, he gave House Democrats more material to work with. Donald Trump has admitted to obstruction justice.

This would be like Bill Clinton saying he’ll survive impeachment because he paid for dry cleaning Monica’s blue dress, or Richard Nixon saying he won’t get caught because he taped over the Oval Office tapes with Burt Bacharach’s greatest hits.

Trump’s administration has gone from “no quid pro quo” to “get over it.” They even refuse to let the guy who made that admission testify. Now, they’ve gone from “no collusion” to Trump telling George Stephanoplous before this mess began that he’d accept help from a foreign government to “the president (sic) can do whatever he wants.”

Apparently, whatever he wants includes obstruction and concealing evidence. Donald Trump is guilty and a criminal who should be immediately frogmarched into the nearest federal prison with every Republican chucklefuck who’s participated in his corruption.

Donald Trump is an idiot who’s dumb enough to admit his guilt. But with Republicans controlling the Senate, it doesn’t matter.

Creative Notes: I had this idea a few weeks ago. I even posted the rough here. But yesterday, Trump’s comment brought it back with me changing the text. Another creative note: Thanks, Quannah for “Chucklefuck.”

 

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