Andrea Mills 2: Watching Tom Appear to Lose His Mind

[louannems]

He said when all the medical bills are tallied up, it will be about $200 K.  Scamitarian has a $250 K limit, so he is prepaying to get discounts and avoid going over.  He claims he will be totally reimbursed.

He's also gone on about funeral expenses, but also said more than twice that they had a life insurance policy on Andrea, which should have more than covered it.  He's never told us the insurance amount, but policies on healthy females are cheap.  Who knows, it could be 200 K or more.

[SilverBeach]

Grief and greed are not mutually exclusive. Tom is greedy and has veered into grifting territory. This isn't the first family with young children to lose a mom (remember Rachel Held Evans?), and won't be the last.  The vast majority of these families do not attempt to become social media celebrities and profit off of their loss. 

Tom holds reprehensible views about a lot of things, as did Andrea (RIP). I do hope that those who sympathize and send money don't agree with those views.  Besides, can the grift go on forever?  He would be better served by getting off of YouTube, closing the GFM, stopping donations, and coming up with a long-range plan to support his children economically and emotionally.  But I doubt if his ego will allow for such reasonable actions. 

[Koala]

5 hours ago, moreorlessnu said:

I took this to mean that Andrea cooked many things from scratch. 

Maybe?  But even if that were true, she couldn't have been saving them anywhere near what they have received in grocery credit (I believe it was over 3 grand), Wal-mart gift cards (total unknown, but he indicated there were a lot), and free dinners for 2 months (Meal Train). 

There is ABSOLUTELY no way he has been spending more on groceries than usual.  Unless he means that he's spending more of other people's money than usual.  Let's face it- he likely hasn't had to pay a single penny of their own money for groceries since mid August.  And you know what?  That's great.  It's nice that people have been so generous.  But don't complain that you're having to spend so much on groceries, when you've been more than clear that other people are covering it for you at the moment.  

Tom has had a major cash and gift influx.  His response has been to declare that he doesn't need it, while simultaneously promoting it and talking about how relieved he is to have it/how many ways he can spend it.  Same with the gifts.  He has openly requested clothes for the kids, and acted like it was almost a favor to "The Youtube People" to let them sew/purchase them.  But it's not.  Some of these people (probably most of them) are financially strapped themselves.   It's unfair to continue to float requests, list sizes, and show wish lists.

Hell, he even does it with the candy.  On a recent live-stream, he was showing some candy that a "fan" sent.  He didn't know the name, but really liked it.  Naturally, viewers scrambled to find the (very easy to find) name of the gummy.  Tom's response?  He really didn't need the name, because there was no need to order more.  He suspected that some would be arriving in the mail soon.  Because of course it will.  Probably bags and bags of it.

It's ridiculous.  

[Giraffe]

Has he been placed on the “things fundies grift” thread yet? I feel like he’s at that point. 

[FreeFundiesKids]

So I lurked on Tom Mills FB, it seems that he discovered this website. Pus Knuckles has passed away according to his facebook as well. I am not sure if its allowed to do a screenshot on his FB and post it on here??

[Queen Of Hearts]

1 minute ago, FreeFundiesKids said:

So I lurked on Tom Mills FB, it seems that he discovered this website. Pus Knuckles has passed away according to his facebook as well. I am not sure if its allowed to do a screenshot on his FB and post it on here??

Hi Tom!  Nice try but we know you found us sooner that just now... your damage control video from the other day where you defended your gal-pal Rachel and your grifting ways proved that.  But kudos to you for trying to make it sound like we are a new discovery to you.  

For the record, many of us like your family... just not your current behavior.  Right now you are coming across as a male Kate Gosslin which is not a good look on you.  

[mollysmom]

How the fuck do you "stumble" onto a snark website & find your family? Hey Tommy, stop googling yourself. Get the fuck off the computer & take care of your kids! They need love! They need someone to listen to them! Take care of them. You are their father. Not Asher! I felt bad for you at the beginning & still feel bad that you lost the love of your life but for the love of God your kids lost their momma. You are not the only one grieving. Take care of your kids!  Sheesh! 

[Curious]

50 minutes ago, FreeFundiesKids said:

So I lurked on Tom Mills FB, it seems that he discovered this website. Pus Knuckles has passed away according to his facebook as well. I am not sure if its allowed to do a screenshot on his FB and post it on here??

if the posts are public, you can post screenshots (and we encourage that because these folks have a tendency to go private and/or scrub their sites).  If you have to be friends to see his posts then we don't allow screenshots, but you can paraphrase posts if you like.

[mollysmom]

On 10/10/2019 at 6:38 AM, moreorlessnu said:

 It pains me to see the time and care people put into creating and packaging a box for the family, and then Tom tearing through it like the house is on fire, tossing items aside with a quick, half-hearted thank you. I don't know what the rush is. I think the people sending these boxes would enjoy seeing the family take the time to appreciate the items, and I think viewers would like to see that, too. Tom appears to think that viewers would rather be rushed through the gift opening, so that there's more time to watch the family playing games. 

 

During the last live game night someone bought some snow pants for Thomas (the oldest) & without even looking at the snow pants he tossed them onto the floor behind him. I get that he is a teenager but that was so incredibly disrespectful! If I was the one who sent them that would have pissed me off. He's learning to be ungrateful from dear old dad. 

[SilverBeach]

58 minutes ago, Queen Of Hearts said:

For the record, many of us like your family

I guess I'm having a hard time understanding liking a family where the parents espouse whackadoodle and hateful beliefs. I just can't compartmentalize like that. Children losing their mother is always sad, and of course I have nothing against them because they are innocent. but I can't say that I like this family.  It's kind of a train wreck. I hope the crazy beliefs do not rub off on the kids. It is likely they will because of the isolation.

I'm glad that poor dog is out of his misery. I also hope he was respectfully disposed of.

Edited October 18, 2019 by SilverBeach

[Palimpsest]

Eh, I'm going to quote rather than screenshot but Tom's Facebook post is public

Quote

Been kind of a hard day, stumbled upon one of these “snark” websites, where people just criticize large families, and they had a lot of bad things to say about us, which has been very disturbing...in addition I had an appointment for Knuckes at the vet, and they recommended we put him down, so we did ?

Kind of a rough day. Thanks everyone for all the nice comments the last couple days.

The man has time to google himself and "stumble" on snarky websites.  And enough time to ramble on for hours and film his children for youtube instead of interacting with them properly.  Go Tom.  (Yes, that was sarcastic.)

He may not even mean FJ.  I've found a couple of other sites talking about the Mills family that are far more unkind.  No, I will not link them.

Even if he does mean FJ, I find the Mills family "disturbing."  Especially Tom in his present state of grifting and denial.  I wonder when reality will hit him and he really comes to terms with what Andrea's death means for the children.

I don't think the reality has really hit him yet, but again.  All the presents and money in the world are not going to help the children process their mother's death.  He needs to stop pretending they are OK and coping just fine.  I do not believe they are just fine.

And RIP, Knuckles.  I'm glad you were finally put out of your misery.   Good dog.

 

 

Edited October 18, 2019 by Palimpsest

[fundiefollower]

22 minutes ago, mollysmom said:

During the last live game night someone bought some snow pants for Thomas (the oldest) & without even looking at the snow pants he tossed them onto the floor behind him. I get that he is a teenager but that was so incredibly disrespectful! If I was the one who sent them that would have pissed me off. He's learning to be ungrateful from dear old dad. 

I'm pretty sure he set them on the bench next to him but I'd have to rewatch to verify.  The table was full with Hannah in front of him as well as game stuff. To me he looked at them and set them down. 

[Curious]

Hi Tom!

We don't discriminate here.  We criticize people who hold dangerous and hateful beliefs no matter what size family they have!

I know you are grieving and I'm truly sorry for the loss of Andrea, but I can't help but wonder how you would feel if people said she was a "crisis actor" and this whole thing was just so you could get a bunch of GoFundMe money and gifts.  That she's not really dead or she didn't even exist and it was a false flag operation.   I doubt you would feel very good about that.

Imagine how the Sandy Hook parents feel when they see you say the child they lost didn't really exist.

Also, please stop saying your kids are fine.   I haven't watched any of the videos but I can tell you your kids are NOT find.  They lost their momma.  They lost their caretaker.  It's clear you have NO idea how much Andrea did or how she did it.  If YOU are grieving why would it even cross your mind that your children are fine?

Get them some counseling from a licensed professional, not some church elder that will tell them who knows what.

[AuntCloud]

4 hours ago, SilverBeach said:

Grief and greed are not mutually exclusive. Tom is greedy and has veered into grifting territory. This isn't the first family with young children to lose a mom (remember Rachel Held Evans?), and won't be the last.  The vast majority of these families do not attempt to become social media celebrities and profit off of their loss. 

Tom holds reprehensible views about a lot of things, as did Andrea (RIP). I do hope that those who sympathize and send money don't agree with those views.  Besides, can the grift go on forever?  He would be better served by getting off of YouTube, closing the GFM, stopping donations, and coming up with a long-range plan to support his children economically and emotionally.  But I doubt if his ego will allow for such reasonable actions. 

Does this mean the next thread title should be Tom Mills - grieving greedy grifter?

[Pelised]

Tom's FB post about Knuckles includes a "snark" website? Coincidence?  I think not. His YouTube post included a ton of references to what's posted here.  Most notably the pee on the table comments!  Maybe he learned something! 

[Pleiades_06]

Tom, if you are reading this, I am not on this site because I am a hater. I joined Free Jinger because I oppose fundamentalism and extreme views of all kind and feel the need to talk about it in order to think of ways to peacefully oppose it. Your family has expressed some pretty extreme views. If you discuss your philosophies publicly, expect to have people comment on them in order to process what you have to say. 

8 minutes ago, Pelised said:

Tom's FB post about Knuckles includes a "snark" website? Coincidence?  I think not. His YouTube post included a ton of references to what's posted here.  Most notably the pee on the table comments!  Maybe he learned something! 

I hope so, but I think the Facebook People are just stoking his ego. He wants validation and not to hear that people disagree with his actions and approach.

[Palimpsest]

56 minutes ago, Curious said:

Get them some counseling from a licensed professional, not some church elder that will tell them who knows what.

I loved the rest of your post, but Tom Mills is the only *church elder*.  He home churches and what he says goes.

I think we all know he is grieving.  I think we all want to give him time.  I think we all wonder whether he will ever understand that his previous way of life isn't feasible now -- without sacrificing his older children's needs for the little ones.  And without stepping up to take care of the little ones himself.

Because Thomas and Asher (especially Asher, but he always was Andrea's back-up) are stepping up magnificently to take care of them.  As are other relatives.  Tom, who is, and always has been Peter Pan-like, is acting entitled, grifting like a greedy asshole, and burying his head in the sand.

Yes, he has been sideswiped by Andrea's sudden death.  I think we all know that. 

But, Tom, if you are reading this, pull your head out of the sand.  It is not all about you.

It is about the children you have fathered.

And, unlike your Youtube fans, I think you are doing a piss-poor job of looking after the children's emotional needs.  

Edited October 18, 2019 by Palimpsest

[Queen Of Hearts]

3 hours ago, SilverBeach said:

I guess I'm having a hard time understanding liking a family where the parents espouse whackadoodle and hateful beliefs. I just can't compartmentalize like that.  

Because I find it possible to appreciate the good in people while agreeing to disagree where I don't agree in most cases. I admired Andrea's homemaking skills and found the kids to appear to be kind, funny and we'll behaved. If they were my neighbors, I could see enjoying chatting over the fence with them and just knowing what topics to keep off limits.  And regardless of the beliefs of Tom and Andrea, the kids shouldn't be held accountable. Hence the reason I say I liked them. I STILL like the family... minus Tom.

[SilverBeach]

27 minutes ago, Queen Of Hearts said:

Because I find it possible to appreciate the good in people while agreeing to disagree where I don't agree in most cases.

That's admirable. Like RBG and her friendship with Scalia. I'm not made this way though.  If the bad is reprehensible enough, no amount of good can outweigh it, as far as I am concerned. Andrea and Tom denied Sandy Hook was real, for heaven's sake. A hideously violent incident where many of other people's children were killed, leaving their families devastated for the rest of their lives.  We can agree to disagree about some things, but if you believe something fundamentally harmful, I can't fuck with you. Like Trump lovers. I have no use for them because I'm black and Dump is a white supremacist.  Not to mention his misogyny and xenophobia. So no, our value systems are too different for me to chat with you over the fence if you support that cretin, especially if you are loud and proud about it.  If Tom and Andrea had been my neighbors, I would have been looking to move. I find these types of people scary. 

But you do you. The people you like are your business and certainly don't need to be justified to me or anybody else. 

 

27 minutes ago, Queen Of Hearts said:

And regardless of the beliefs of Tom and Andrea, the kids shouldn't be held accountable.

I certainly didn't say they should be.  I specifically said that the children are innocent. The family is Tom and the kids now.  So, you really like the kids, not the family. Tom shouldn't be able to hide behind his kind, funny, and well-behaved children. 

Edited October 19, 2019 by SilverBeach

[Alice in Fundieland]

11 minutes ago, SilverBeach said:

That's admirable. Like RBG and her friendship with Scalia. I'm not made this way though.  If the bad is reprehensible enough, no amount of good can outweigh it, as far as I am concerned. Andrea and Tom denied Sandy Hook was real, for heaven's sake. A hideously violent incident where many of other people's children were killed, leaving their families devastated for the rest of their lives.  We can agree to disagree about some things, but if you believe something fundamentally harmful, I can't fuck with you. Like Trump lovers. I have no use for them because I'm black and Dump is a white supremacist.  Not to mention his misogyny and xenophobia. So no, our value systems are too different for me to chat with you over the fence if you support that cretin, especially if you are loud and proud about it.  If Tom and Andrea had been my neighbors, I would have been looking to move. I find these types of people scary. 

But you do you. The people you like are your business and certainly don't need to be justified to me or anybody else. 

I saw this on social media recently and I think it applies here. No offense intended to anyone who feels differently.

Spoiler

 

[jozina]

Honest question - what's so admirable about those homemaking skills, especially that it's worth compartmentalising such hideous character flaws? Their meals are not something I'd want to replicate with my family nutrition-wise, their house makes me feel claustrophobic just watching a 5 minute video and the hygiene situation in that house seems to leave much to be desired. Her sewing was fine and I'm sure she needed to be organised with that number of kids, but I'm not going to sit there thinking "Rufus save us, I'll ignore how you feel about my gay sister and me being a working woman to see how you sew a shirt from a pattern!"

There are topics I can avoid with my neighbours and then there's knowing that they can look at grieving parents and think said parents are crisis actors pretending they couldn't have an open casket because their child's jaw was shot off.  Home dentistry, home medical and a cramped room full of boys living in caves freak me out even without getting into the 24 hour Bible recording or the deleted videos or hideous content.  Of all the families discussed about on here I've gotta confess I'm mystified by why a decent number of people on here do like them.

Edited October 19, 2019 by jozina

[FecundFundieFundus]

I've copied a few things from Andrea organization wise. She was still off. The way she and Tom controlled the kids was disturbing even before I knew about the crazy fringe conspiracy theories they're into.

[Eternalbluepearl]

I wonder if Andrea's sudden death has made Tom look more into nutrition to be around for his kids for a long time. I know he's the picture of health and all food is good and everything but just wondering... 

[formergothardite]

47 minutes ago, Queen Of Hearts said:

Because I find it possible to appreciate the good in people while agreeing to disagree

It seems easy for you to agree to disagree, but what about the parents whose children were murdered while at school and have to face people like Andrea calling them liars? What about the families of 9/11 who have to listen deal with the vile spewings of people like Andrea? What about her children who are raised being indoctrinated with hate and racism? There is a hell of a lot of privilege in "agreeing to disagree" with people who ooze pure hate and attempt to strip others of rights like Andrea did. Many people don't have the privilege to act so casually about the evil that Andrea preached because it is their lives that are being impacted by these beliefs.

Before praising her, I would stop and think long and hard about the people who suffer because of beliefs like Andrea's. 

[Pleiades_06]

50 minutes ago, Alice in Fundieland said:

I saw this on social media recently and I think it applies here. No offense intended to anyone who feels differently.

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