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Andrea Mills 2: Watching Tom Appear to Lose His Mind


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1 minute ago, Sister_Wife said:

Can you imagine how valuable, comforting and connecting it would be for those kids to spend 40 minutes playing a fun game with Dad and Siblings WITHOUT YouTube watching on? 

Or, even better, to have several sessions with 2-4 people each playing a game that is age-appropriate for them, without the "You Tube people." Or having the older kids play a board or card game while Dad spends time playing with the youngest kids (again, without the YTers).

There are so many configurations that would allow each child to be entertained, engaged, challenged, and not used as a begging tool on Youtube. A little eye contact from Dad would be nice.

They all seemed miserable in that video -- some stonefaced, some flopping limply, some trying to entertain themselves while waiting around.

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When Andrea was in the hospital and got the news that her illness was terminal I thought that Tom leaning on Youtube to get through was fine. Even though some of his live updates shortly after her death were odd, I gave him a pass. Youtube was his connection to Andrea. Watching Tom now I am so sad for the kids, he has no idea what they need. I understand he may be overwhelmed but the little girls are just getting tossed among the siblings and ignored. Babies screaming and crying during live youtube with no response from Dad except to say this is real life is so depressing. Poor Hannah gets put to bed in her dirty clothes, dirty diaper with no hugs and kisses from Dad often screaming from being overtired. The older boys are trying to manage a household during the day as if they are the parents. I can't imagine how stressful that must be for them. I couldn't imagine doing school the way they did when Andrea was alive, too noisy, it must be terrible now.  Poor Judah who is having a tough time and says so is just shut down by Tom. I hope someone can help him feel better about school. The Mills family is on its way to falling apart and it's very sad to see. 

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The bit about Hannah not remembering Andrea makes me so sad and is such a misunderstanding of child development. She doesn't remember specific memories of Andrea at this point, but she's astute enough to know that something has drastically changed in her world and that the sights, sounds, and smells she was accustomed to are no longer there. She's old enough to miss nursing and the comfort Andrea gave. She's also aware enough to realize that her cries and fussing won't be responded to. It's a desperately sad situation. I recognize that Asher taking the place of a parent is unacceptable, but what a remarkable young man to take the responsibility to care for a young child the way he has. Asher supplies all the comfort that Little Hannah has at this point. 

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I've thought for awhile that Judah was the most likely to break free from that mess.  He seems to have a very upbeat and individualized personality.  Even his hair is adorable. 

I recall Andrea talking about miscarriages last year.  I know she said she had one while she was at a mall shopping with the kids and I thought she mentioned other miscarriages in that video. 

Tom thinks he's a video star.  He's never had this much attention from anyone but Andrea. 

I find it so weird when YouTube creators talk about how the viewers are such close friends.  So many seem to only have the faceless YouTube people as their only confidants.  Tom takes it to the extreme.  He's truly ridiculous and sickening 

Maybe it should be Free Hannah. She seems to be the one that needs out most. 

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18 hours ago, louannems said:

I watched the livestream game night to catch Hanna atrocities. I was not disappointed.  The game night begins with 17 months Hanna crawling on the dining room table (where else would she be)? Her saggy diaper obviously hasn't been changed in hours and she leaks pee all over the table.

Tom does actually get up and tells us that it's real life.  Then he takes the kitchen dish cloth from the sink and wipes up the pee with it!  Oh, yes he did.  He tossed it back in the sink (oh, yes he did) and without washing his hands, he sits down and continued the game.

Meanwhile, it was teenaged Asher whose job it was to mop up Hanna.  She is returned in a dry diaper and nothing else.  She was pretty cute, too.

Sophia won the game and it was candy for all, with Claudia crying for not winning.  Claudia crys after every game night and Tom gives her hugs and comfort.  Maybe that's the only time he gives her attention.

If the kids went to real school I wonder what they would think of all this coverage of their lives?  Would they really want to deal with other kids potentially teasing them about the goings on (pee on the table??? G-R-O-S-S!

Maybe if they had a more public life within their own community Tom wouldn't be ok with posting 'real' life.

Just a thought.  They need more friends and influences outside of home to understand that not all people live the way they do.

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Did you noticed that Asher was actually forced to smile just to please the "youtube people"? Poor kid, he just lost his mother, inside his heart he must be suffering, but he has to mention that he is ok. When Tom left the table for a few seconds someone asked Asher if he was feeling better that day, to what he answers very quickly that yes. In the meanwhile Tom returns to that tablet and asks what is going on, to what Asher just makes a yellow smile, the most weird situation ever... you have to observe his facial expression, something forced, faked towards his father. I feel like Tom doesn't let the kids speak for themselves in front of the "youtube people", everything is just a facade for getting people's sympathy and donations of money and stuff, so the kids are forced to be present at all his live videos, even if they don't feel like it. I feel pity for Asher, he is trapped in a complicated situation, having to be a teenager father of his own baby sister.

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Claudia melts my heart. I think she is just the cutest, sassiest little thing ever and I love it. 

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31 minutes ago, Tekas_76 said:

Did you noticed that Asher was actually forced to smile just to please the "youtube people"? Poor kid, he just lost his mother, inside his heart he must be suffering, but he has to mention that he is ok. When Tom left the table for a few seconds someone asked Asher if he was feeling better that day, to what he answers very quickly that yes. In the meanwhile Tom returns to that tablet and asks what is going on, to what Asher just makes a yellow smile, the most weird situation ever... you have to observe his facial expression, something forced, faked towards his father. I feel like Tom doesn't let the kids speak for themselves in front of the "youtube people", everything is just a facade for getting people's sympathy and donations of money and stuff, so the kids are forced to be present at all his live videos, even if they don't feel like it. I feel pity for Asher, he is trapped in a complicated situation, having to be a teenager father of his own baby sister.

I thought the same thing.  He looks miserable and is absolutely being forced to table his own grief and be Hannah's parent.

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Asher always looks fairly miserable just being in this family, going back several years.  He has that moody, emotionless demeanor.

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22 hours ago, louannems said:

I watched the livestream game night to catch Hanna atrocities. I was not disappointed.  The game night begins with 17 months Hanna crawling on the dining room table (where else would she be)? Her saggy diaper obviously hasn't been changed in hours and she leaks pee all over the table.

Tom does actually get up and tells us that it's real life.  Then he takes the kitchen dish cloth from the sink and wipes up the pee with it!  Oh, yes he did.  He tossed it back in the sink (oh, yes he did) and without washing his hands, he sits down and continued the game.

Meanwhile, it was teenaged Asher whose job it was to mop up Hanna.  She is returned in a dry diaper and nothing else.  She was pretty cute, too.

Sophia won the game and it was candy for all, with Claudia crying for not winning.  Claudia crys after every game night and Tom gives her hugs and comfort.  Maybe that's the only time he gives her attention.

After the game, Tom let the kids each pick some candy out of a box. Eden chose a packet of some type of 1/2 inch candy spheres. She poured the candy in a pile in front of her, and 1 candy ball rolled towards Hannah. No one noticed that in a flash, Hannah grabbed the candy that rolled toward her and ate it. Hannah was already eating a lollipop so it probably didn't matter that she also got a tiny piece of candy, but I thought what if they had been doing a beading craft, and no one noticed she put something in her mouth, or what if it had been larger jaw breaker type candy large enough for her to choke...

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11 hours ago, ViolaSebastian said:

The bit about Hannah not remembering Andrea makes me so sad and is such a misunderstanding of child development. She doesn't remember specific memories of Andrea at this point, but she's astute enough to know that something has drastically changed in her world and that the sights, sounds, and smells she was accustomed to are no longer there. She's old enough to miss nursing and the comfort Andrea gave. She's also aware enough to realize that her cries and fussing won't be responded to. It's a desperately sad situation. I recognize that Asher taking the place of a parent is unacceptable, but what a remarkable young man to take the responsibility to care for a young child the way he has. Asher supplies all the comfort that Little Hannah has at this point. 

She does remember Andrea though. Tom can't deny this as he has shared this on his Facebook page.

 

4 hours ago, mollysmom said:

Claudia melts my heart. I think she is just the cutest, sassiest little thing ever and I love it. 

Personally, I think she'll be the one that will be the hardest Tom will have to handle as a teenager.  Sassy may be the word for it now but boy she's going to be a handful. (have thought this for a long time though, not just due to current situation)

Edited by under siege
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Comments are now the first thing I go to with Tom's vlogs (if I do watch the vlogs I usually have them muted). Amongst the usual praise and stroking his ego there are some more practical / interesting comments which is reassuring to see.

(Spooky Costume Selection ¦ Large Family Shop with Me ¦ October 2019)
For example, a few remarks about Hannah's car seat including....

Amber Vanderveer 2 hours ago "Not in a hateful way at all but I think Hannah needs a bigger car seat. Looks like y’all had fun :) you are a great dad! "

reply from Rachel Day 2 hours ago 'Got it covered, thanks"

Cora Huth 3 hours ago "Cannot wait to see everyone all dressed up. Some pretty cool costumes were chosen. I think baby Hannah is going through a growth spurt, lol. She's gonna need a bigger carseat soon. < 3"

reply Rachel Day 2 hours ago "She is growing fast! Got that covered"



Also commets about the clothing no longer matching...

Mistie Woodard 1 hour ago "Wow I just noticed everyone’s not wearing the same color clothes"

reply Rachel Day 19 minutes ago "It's because some colors are still missing. Or rather he's waiting to receive them"


I know she's already been discussed on this thread previously but for someone who has her own family it always strikes me as odd that Rachel is SO present in all of Tom's videos and on facebook. Not saying she shouldn't be supporting him but, unless she is related, it's a lot more support than most friends for be able to do on the constant. She had a baby a few months back, she homeschools two (or maybe one and one other is pre-school?) and has an older step-son, that for most moms would definitely keep them super busy, time maybe to watch videos but to keep up with comments of just an on-line friend's page too? I'd love to buy some time off her ?

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On 10/15/2019 at 8:01 PM, Sister_Wife said:

Can you imagine how valuable, comforting and connecting it would be for those kids to spend 40 minutes playing a fun game with Dad and Siblings WITHOUT YouTube watching on? 

If a Mills does something not streamed on YouTube, did it really happen?

It really seems like Tom gets validation and his ego filled from the YouTube comments. He kind of reminds me of Kate Gosselin and her “love offerings.”

 

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14 hours ago, AverageJane said:

Tom thinks he's a video star.  He's never had this much attention from anyone but Andrea. 

 

3 hours ago, KnittingOwl said:

If a Mills does something not streamed on YouTube, did it really happen?

Both of these are so true and so sad.

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5 hours ago, under siege said:

Comments are now the first thing I go to with Tom's vlogs (if I do watch the vlogs I usually have them muted). Amongst the usual praise and stroking his ego there are some more practical / interesting comments which is reassuring to see.

(Spooky Costume Selection ¦ Large Family Shop with Me ¦ October 2019)
For example, a few remarks about Hannah's car seat including....

Amber Vanderveer 2 hours ago "Not in a hateful way at all but I think Hannah needs a bigger car seat. Looks like y’all had fun :) you are a great dad! "

reply from Rachel Day 2 hours ago 'Got it covered, thanks"

Cora Huth 3 hours ago "Cannot wait to see everyone all dressed up. Some pretty cool costumes were chosen. I think baby Hannah is going through a growth spurt, lol. She's gonna need a bigger carseat soon. < 3"

reply Rachel Day 2 hours ago "She is growing fast! Got that covered"



Also commets about the clothing no longer matching...

Mistie Woodard 1 hour ago "Wow I just noticed everyone’s not wearing the same color clothes"

reply Rachel Day 19 minutes ago "It's because some colors are still missing. Or rather he's waiting to receive them"


I know she's already been discussed on this thread previously but for someone who has her own family it always strikes me as odd that Rachel is SO present in all of Tom's videos and on facebook. Not saying she shouldn't be supporting him but, unless she is related, it's a lot more support than most friends for be able to do on the constant. She had a baby a few months back, she homeschools two (or maybe one and one other is pre-school?) and has an older step-son, that for most moms would definitely keep them super busy, time maybe to watch videos but to keep up with comments of just an on-line friend's page too? I'd love to buy some time off her ?

I just made a comment about Tom being waiting to "receive" the missing colour clothes. Is he waiting for a delivery of an order or waiting for the "youtube people" to send it to him? After about $69,170 in donations does he still needs to ask for people to send him free stuff, or he is getting greedy for free stuff and easy money to pay for all his heart's desires.

I also commented to a lady saying that as soon as she receives her pension that she would add more to the GFM account. Most of these people are very needy and have bills to pay, medicines, etc, and they ask for sorry for not being able to give more. FGS Tom has his own business, he already has a good amount of donation's money, why is he being so greedy and won't close the GFM account so people that actually needs the money can have some...

I guess that Rachel Day, whoever she is, will block me for being honest in my comments… I wonder if she is an internet friend or a real life friend... the other day I made a comment and it was deleted… after that I made a second one and asked "are you going to delete my comment today also?", to what Mr. Tom answered : "i didn't deleted your comment ?". Anyway, it's very weird that anything I put there is a highlighted comment, even when it's a critic … Why is that? LOL

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Whoa....

Tom's snark towards Claudia in that video was completely unacceptable.

She picked an adorable witch costume, and Tom said, 

"You wanna be a witch?  That's a big surprise." (sarcasm)

A few minutes later they find one in her size.  Tom's response?

"It's totally in your personality, anyways..."

He finally wraps up by showing what each child picked.  Naturally, he makes a snarky comment about Claudia's choice. 

"And Claudia's going to be, guess what?  A witch."  

OMG!  That is a 3 or 4 year old child you're talking about, and I'll tell you something else for free, Tom.  At least she's not a grown ass man, exploiting his grieving family for free clothes, candy, and money.  Get a grip on yourself.  You are no one to be acting like that child is a witch.  She's practically a toddler.  Go sit in the corner somewhere and eat the garbage candy all your "fans" send you.  That child has been through enough.  She doesn't need your bullshit.  Words like that stick with kids.  They aren't as resilient as people tell you they are.

Oh, and ps-

I hope spokeswoman Rachel is right, because that baby does need a new carseat.  And the straps?  They are ridiculously loose.  To the point of being useless.  My kids are just about grown, and even I know this shit.  It's not new knowledge.  After 9 kids, it's time to get a clue, Tom.  Maybe put the merry-go-round purchase on hold, and invest in the carseat she actually needs.  I believe Wal-mart sells them.  

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10 hours ago, under siege said:

She does remember Andrea though. Tom can't deny this as he has shared this on his Facebook page.

 

Personally, I think she'll be the one that will be the hardest Tom will have to handle as a teenager.  Sassy may be the word for it now but boy she's going to be a handful. (have thought this for a long time though, not just due to current situation)

The ability to have memories of specific events (which I believe is what Tom is referring to when he says she won't have memories of Andrea) develop between 14 and 18 months. I was under the impression that Hannah was 11 months. In any case, I find it more likely someone told her that the picture in the locket was "mama" and she's responding to that. Again, I'm just referring to conscious memories--she definitely has a memory of her mother, it's just not what we think of as memories in people who are further developmentally along. 

https://www.babycenter.com/404_when-will-my-baby-start-remembering-things_6888.bc

We talk a lot on here about what happens if a fundie woman with little education, job possibilities, and life experience at certain activities due to gender restrictions is suddenly left widowed. The opposite side of the coin, which is of course a widower being left with a very large family and little to no idea how to run a household and parent children day-to-day. Tom Mills is the perfect, albeit nightmarish, example of why fundamentalism hurts men, too. This situation appears to be devolving rapidly, and it's really my only hope that relatives will step in soon. 

Edited by ViolaSebastian
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What's his plan for when the gullible wander off to another grifter? That GFM isn't going to be collecting money forever... 

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He’s making these children vulnerable to all kinda of abuse and exploitation and couldn’t care less! His asshole comments about Claudia being a witch are disgusting!

Let me rephrae this: HE is already exploiting them on YouTube and he’s setting the kids up for even more down the line. 

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9 hours ago, under siege said:

Comments are now the first thing I go to with Tom's vlogs (if I do watch the vlogs I usually have them muted). Amongst the usual praise and stroking his ego there are some more practical / interesting comments which is reassuring to see.

(Spooky Costume Selection ¦ Large Family Shop with Me ¦ October 2019)
For example, a few remarks about Hannah's car seat including....

Amber Vanderveer 2 hours ago "Not in a hateful way at all but I think Hannah needs a bigger car seat. Looks like y’all had fun :) you are a great dad! "

reply from Rachel Day 2 hours ago 'Got it covered, thanks"

Cora Huth 3 hours ago "Cannot wait to see everyone all dressed up. Some pretty cool costumes were chosen. I think baby Hannah is going through a growth spurt, lol. She's gonna need a bigger carseat soon. < 3"

reply Rachel Day 2 hours ago "She is growing fast! Got that covered"



Also commets about the clothing no longer matching...

Mistie Woodard 1 hour ago "Wow I just noticed everyone’s not wearing the same color clothes"

reply Rachel Day 19 minutes ago "It's because some colors are still missing. Or rather he's waiting to receive them"


I know she's already been discussed on this thread previously but for someone who has her own family it always strikes me as odd that Rachel is SO present in all of Tom's videos and on facebook. Not saying she shouldn't be supporting him but, unless she is related, ?

 

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Just now, Zenyatta said:

Tom's groupies/censors are disconcerting.  He explained that Thomas is the first YT monitor followed by three women who are longtime followers/friends.  To delete troll comments is one thing. For a non-family member to delete or answer questions is irritating to me. Comments should just be turned off then, but I know that Tom wouldn't get the adoration he craves. 

 

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1 hour ago, louannems said:

Hanna is nearly 18 months old; she was 16 months when Andrea died.  She is the latest walker I know.

Oh wow. She does not seem like 18 months. I completely retract my comment. @under siege, I concede your point; you were right.

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5 hours ago, louannems said:

Hanna is nearly 18 months old; she was 16 months when Andrea died.  She is the latest walker I know.

My Kids #1 #2 and #4 all walked between 17-18 months. As long as they’re moving towards walking, which Hanna seems to be, I was told it wasn’t a concern. #3 was 14.5 months and #5 was 10 months. 

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9 hours ago, Tekas_76 said:

I just made a comment about Tom being waiting to "receive" the missing colour clothes. Is he waiting for a delivery of an order or waiting for the "youtube people" to send it to him? After about $69,170 in donations does he still needs to ask for people to send him free stuff, or he is getting greedy for free stuff and easy money to pay for all his heart's desires.

I also commented to a lady saying that as soon as she receives her pension that she would add more to the GFM account. Most of these people are very needy and have bills to pay, medicines, etc, and they ask for sorry for not being able to give more. FGS Tom has his own business, he already has a good amount of donation's money, why is he being so greedy and won't close the GFM account so people that actually needs the money can have some...

I guess that Rachel Day, whoever she is, will block me for being honest in my comments… I wonder if she is an internet friend or a real life friend... the other day I made a comment and it was deleted… after that I made a second one and asked "are you going to delete my comment today also?", to what Mr. Tom answered : "i didn't deleted your comment ?". Anyway, it's very weird that anything I put there is a highlighted comment, even when it's a critic … Why is that? LOL

I saw your first comment about them asking for money & wanted to high five you! I'm glad you said what you did. It's the truth! That Rachel Day annoys the crap out of me. She get's so defensive over everything! Personally I think it's really creepy that she's just a fan & knows that much about the family. Any honestly, the way she answers the questions it makes it sound like she lives there with them. I know that she doesn't and I'm not starting rumors or anything but the way she talks and answers sounds like she's part of the family. A few days ago someone asked if Asher is ok and she said "Asher is fine" How the fuck does she know??! Ugh she annoys me. 

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