Bro Gary Hawkins 9: He still makes my dinner come back up

[CTRLZero]

19 hours ago, Briefly said:

FJ has totally corrupted me.  Every time I go to the grocery store, I think of Gwen Shamblin when I walk down the aisle with chips or cokes

This is so true!  In a random thought, I was trying to picture what each fundy would have in their customized Jim Bakker Bucket o'Doom.  Of course, when you opened Gwen Shamblin's bucket, you would find three potato chips and a can of coke.  I'd probably be afraid to open Bro Gary's customized bucket.  (And after a search for the term "buckets" on FJ, I wouldn't even touch the Nogs bucket with a 20-foot pole!  Eek!)   These are the things I think about in my contemplative moments.   ?

[RidiculousFundies]

On 11/23/2018 at 8:23 PM, HerNameIsBuffy said:

continued from here  ...

thanks @RidiculousFundies for the thread title.

Been avoiding him still but pleasure!!!! Let me dive back into G-Haw

On 11/28/2018 at 10:30 PM, Alisamer said:

I vote Gary as "Fundie most likely to accidentally summon a demon". At some point he may combine just the right group of spelling errors to summon something. 

On FJ there's always something that makes my week. You made my week! 

[thoughtful]

8 hours ago, Lisafer said:

Right? Tater tots=Duggars. Green beans=JRod. Weens=Gary. Frozen burritos=Maxwells. The grocery store has become a frightening place, filled with fundie demons.

Let's not forget Lori Alexander:

https://www.samsclub.com/sams/tossed-salad-2lb/prod7250393.ip?xid=plp_product_1_2

 

[Texas Heifer]

Ok folks, Gary's younger son realized he wasn't saved. 

Another one bites the dust.

 

Sigh.

Sis Tex

 

(Edited because I felt weird having a little kid's face out there...not his fault his dad is crazy.)

[Candydandy]

Ok folks here’s my snarky finest Bro Gary son’s meant he ain’t saved from livin with a tent haulin, camp chair seekin, broke down bus preachin, weenie gravy eatin fool. Jesus loves children and he has given Bro many hints that he should get a job and take care of his family. I recall a pastor position was even open but Bro missed that chance. They could have had a home not on wheels and a forever kitchen. 

Sis Candy

[FeministShrew]

Poor kid. That brought back bad memories. I spent my childhood, teenage years, & 20s worried to death that I wasn't really "saved" & terrified that I would go to hell. Went to the altar & prayed the "sinner's prayer" countless times, made "public profession of faith" three times in three different churches/denominations (Southern Baptist, IFB, & Freewill Baptist), was baptized each of those three times. 
My inner life was full of torment & doubt. It was hell.
I'm so glad I finally realized I don't need "saving" & never did, & helped my kids escape that mindset, too. We're all much happier.  I'm full of peace now.

[Lisafer]

40 minutes ago, FeministShrew said:

Poor kid. That brought back bad memories. I spent my childhood, teenage years, & 20s worried to death that I wasn't really "saved" & terrified that I would go to hell. Went to the altar & prayed the "sinner's prayer" countless times, made "public profession of faith" three times in three different churches/denominations (Southern Baptist, IFB, & Freewill Baptist), was baptized each of those three times. 
My inner life was full of torment & doubt. It was hell.
I'm so glad I finally realized I don't need "saving" & never did, & helped my kids escape that mindset, too. We're all much happier.  I'm full of peace now.

I was a lot like that, too. I remember a night when I was maybe 12, lying in my bed utterly terrified, clammy hands, sweating, convinced I was going to hell to burn in torment forever. I spent so much of my childhood in fear, never sure that I was "saved."

[keepercjr]

1 hour ago, Lisafer said:

I was a lot like that, too. I remember a night when I was maybe 12, lying in my bed utterly terrified, clammy hands, sweating, convinced I was going to hell to burn in torment forever. I spent so much of my childhood in fear, never sure that I was "saved."

I think this boy is 12 too and I feel absolutely terrible for him. All he hears nearly every day at those church services is how everyone is headed for hell unless they are truly saved and people die every day!  How would a preteen even begin to know if he was saved or not.  Probably absolutely terrified. 

[keepercjr]

Edit..  a few more posts and comments

Spoiler

 

 

[PumaLover]

They ran out of time to put the motor in? Seems like all Bro Gary has is time.

I'm sorry for those of you who had your childhoods tormented by thoughts of doom and hell and demons. I was an adult when I got saved and it was still very confusing and stressful. I'm glad I don't have to worry about any of it anymore. Maybe the kids will eventually grow up and see their dad for who he really is and break away.

[Texas Heifer]

I wasn't raised all that religiously, due to a non-churchgoing father, and a mother who switched churches twice, then gave up taking us to church entirely after my grandmother passed from Alzheimer's. I'm pretty certain I never really believed...I never felt what I think of as 'The Thing' so many believers feel; you know, 'Christ's Love' and like he's in the room with you, blah blah. It was all nothing but frustrating empty space or raw, primal fear for me--an anxious, introverted child with ADHD and depression. I tried for 30+ years to feel 'The Thing ' and never did. Growing up in Texas, which even now is a pretty religious place where one does not normally speak about one's lack of faith, it was a very lonely feeling. My best friend growing up was Baptist, and my best friend since age 22 (we're in our mid-forties now) was raised fundie-lite with a Missouri Synod Lutheran minister for a father. I couldn't even talk about my absence of faith with them. I still can't, even though they know I'm not religious and never have been.

Now I'm so atheist it hurts, but I still get the occasional pang of guilt or fear about going to hell. These days (8 years on from my personal Independence Day), those pangs are so rare and pass so quickly, I don't normally need backup; however, in the early days of my heathenism, I talked it out with my husband (raised Mormon but an atheist from childhood). Especially after my coerced abortion at age 20, I had deep fears about going to hell, despite having prayed a million times for forgiveness. I understand now that it's just conditioning, but fear is a powerful thing. I can't imagine how deep that goes in people raised fundie. It was bad enough for me. For kids like poor Jacob, it must be absolutely crippling.

By the way, I was baptized at 12. I never felt any different, besides a faint relief that, since I had finally been baptized, I would probably not go to hell. 

The way these people raise their kids to think they're going to burn for eternity unless they follow all these manmade, arbitrary rules is just criminal. I hate it so much. Just let your kids be kids. Let them be happy and enjoy their lives. Ugh.

[FullOfGravy]

He ran out of time to put the motor in, and he feels people are criticizing him for not having time for family - so what is taking up his time?  We know he doesn't prepare for his sermons or FB-live preachin'.  Is he a courier running messages between secret agents?  Figuring out how to achieve cold fusion?  Translating the works of Balzac into Weenese?  Skyping in as a mediator in high-level peace talks?

Inquiring minds want to know.

And of course his son has a camo case for his Bible.  OF COURSE he does.

[Dandruff]

2 hours ago, FullOfGravy said:

He ran out of time to put the motor in, and he feels people are criticizing him for not having time for family - so what is taking up his time?

Wasn't there some talk about a possible Jesus camp?  He might be trying to think really hard about it. 

[Lisafer]

2 hours ago, Texas Heifer said:

I wasn't raised all that religiously, due to a non-churchgoing father, and a mother who switched churches twice, then gave up taking us to church entirely after my grandmother passed from Alzheimer's. I'm pretty certain I never really believed...I never felt what I think of as 'The Thing' so many believers feel; you know, 'Christ's Love' and like he's in the room with you, blah blah. It was all nothing but frustrating empty space or raw, primal fear for me--an anxious, introverted child with ADHD and depression. I tried for 30+ years to feel 'The Thing ' and never did. Growing up in Texas, which even now is a pretty religious place where one does not normally speak about one's lack of faith, it was a very lonely feeling. My best friend growing up was Baptist, and my best friend since age 22 (we're in our mid-forties now) was raised fundie-lite with a Missouri Synod Lutheran minister for a father. I couldn't even talk about my absence of faith with them. I still can't, even though they know I'm not religious and never have been.

Now I'm so atheist it hurts, but I still get the occasional pang of guilt or fear about going to hell. These days (8 years on from my personal Independence Day), those pangs are so rare and pass so quickly, I don't normally need backup; however, in the early days of my heathenism, I talked it out with my husband (raised Mormon but an atheist from childhood). Especially after my coerced abortion at age 20, I had deep fears about going to hell, despite having prayed a million times for forgiveness. I understand now that it's just conditioning, but fear is a powerful thing. I can't imagine how deep that goes in people raised fundie. It was bad enough for me. For kids like poor Jacob, it must be absolutely crippling.

By the way, I was baptized at 12. I never felt any different, besides a faint relief that, since I had finally been baptized, I would probably not go to hell. 

The way these people raise their kids to think they're going to burn for eternity unless they follow all these manmade, arbitrary rules is just criminal. I hate it so much. Just let your kids be kids. Let them be happy and enjoy their lives. Ugh.

I'm not an atheist, but like you, that pang of fear about hell passes so quickly for me now. I realized that if there really is a God sending people to hell for never having heard of him or not having worshipped him correctly--that God is a complete ass. And if he's an ass, then nobody in heaven or hell would really ever be safe from his capricious nature. 

[3splenty]

I'm stressed just thinking about life in that house (or lack thereof).  Every day with no schedule, no consistency--unless its fire and brimstone preaching.  

[Black Aliss]

12 hours ago, FeministShrew said:

Poor kid. That brought back bad memories. I spent my childhood, teenage years, & 20s worried to death that I wasn't really "saved" & terrified that I would go to hell. Went to the altar & prayed the "sinner's prayer" countless times, made "public profession of faith" three times in three different churches/denominations (Southern Baptist, IFB, & Freewill Baptist), was baptized each of those three times. 
My inner life was full of torment & doubt. It was hell.
I'm so glad I finally realized I don't need "saving" & never did, & helped my kids escape that mindset, too. We're all much happier.  I'm full of peace now.

You and me both. I got saved at age 5 or so, realized I was still a sinner, got saved again, lather, rinse, repeat.  I remember when I was, maybe 12? my parents took me to a Billy Graham revival  at a venue about 100 miles from where we lived.  It was epic and when BG gave the altar call, I knew that this was the "saving" that would stick but my parents wouldn't let me go down there. 

Agnostic here. Kids are all either agnostic or atheistic. It's good.

[Texas Heifer]

I can't remember if this has already been posted, but when I read it, I rolled my eyes so hard.

This is what I'm talking about! How could kids raised in this kind of environment NOT spend their lives in a constant state of primal, nauseated fear? 

That fear causes their sympathetic nervous system to kick in, releasing cortisol and epinephrine (stress hormones! Fight or flight!). It causes an increase in blood pressure, speeds up respiration (quick, shallow breaths), messes with eyesight (dilates pupils) and slows down the digestive and urinary systems, along with other systems not necessary for fight or flight. It is BAD FOR THEM. It's so unhealthy! 

Becky, as a (former) NURSE, should KNOW THIS STUFF.

I guess she figures it's better to be constantly sick and miserable in this life than burn for all eternity in the next. Well, I believe that this life is all we get. This is it, as far as I am concerned. I'm trying to be healthy and happy now. I'm not worried about hell, though Gary's sons are surely living it. I feel desperately sorry and sad for them. What a wretched existence.

[Texas Heifer]

Gary did a FB live earlier today about salvation. I got about 30 seconds in just now before I noped out. Those 30 seconds included him describing Jacob hammering on his door shouting, "Daddy, I'm not saved! Daddy, I'm going to hell!" And Gary saying something like, "what do you mean, you're not saved? You always said you was (sic) saved!" and then, "well, what are you going to do about it?" Whereupon poor Jacob fell to his knees and started praying for Jesus to save him.

I had to close it out, I felt so sick. I thought it was weird before, one of Gary's sons not considering himself saved so far along in life, but figured maybe he wanted to be certain or something. I guess it just really underscores what some of you have been saying. I wonder how many saved people really feel they are saved, like never ever doubt it. I wonder if Gary ever feels insecure about his salvation.

Those poor kids.

[Dandruff]

57 minutes ago, Texas Heifer said:

Gary did a FB live earlier today about salvation. I got about 30 seconds in just now before I noped out. Those 30 seconds included him describing Jacob hammering on his door shouting, "Daddy, I'm not saved! Daddy, I'm going to hell!" And Gary saying something like, "what do you mean, you're not saved? You always said you was (sic) saved!" and then, "well, what are you going to do about it?" Whereupon poor Jacob fell to his knees and started praying for Jesus to save him.

I hope this isn't a teenage boy thinking the devil is on him because his dad never explained puberty or did so in Weenese.

[Four is Enough]

I suppose it's a Catholic thing, but I have never worried about being "saved". I've come to the conclusion that my own salvation is an ongoing, lifelong thing, not something I did by saying "I take Jesus as my Personal Savior" which is what my fundy friends tried to get me to do more than once.

Don't want to start a fight about this; just want to state my perspective.

[Lisafer]

17 minutes ago, Four is Enough said:

I suppose it's a Catholic thing, but I have never worried about being "saved". I've come to the conclusion that my own salvation is an ongoing, lifelong thing, not something I did by saying "I take Jesus as my Personal Savior" which is what my fundy friends tried to get me to do more than once.

Don't want to start a fight about this; just want to state my perspective.

I don't want to say that fear of not being saved is a uniquely fundie thing, but in my experience it's more common and more stress-inducing in fundies. I was raised Calvinist: God had already decided who would be saved, and it wasn't possible to change that decree. Imagine being afraid that you were doomed to hell from the start!

[Don'tlikekoolaid]

Bro Gary makes my brain hur

Spoiler

Bro read it over before you post.

[Texas Heifer]

Gary, you stupid, abusive prick. You make me tired.

I hope someday all of Gary's victims will see this and cut his ass off.

Gary's god is terrible. 

[thoughtful]

11 hours ago, Don'tlikekoolaid said:

Bro read it over before you post.

That probably is the proof-read and corrected version.

[Four is Enough]

5 hours ago, thoughtful said:

That probably is the proof-read and corrected version.

Eye want argu with that