Bro Gary Hawkins 9: He still makes my dinner come back up

[Beermeet]

12 hours ago, keepercjr said:

I only got to watch part of the video (will try to watch the rest today) but he mentioned only a week long camp in September.  What the hell will he do with the campground for the rest of the year?  I don’t get it.  Thinking about Gary doing any physical work makes me lol.  And does Becky realize what it takes to cook for a huge group of people?

Also this hurts my brain

 

When he says " ....took you today by *I the grave* or the rapture".  Well, he sounds all muder-y!   Is Gary going to kill me?  Is this a heads up?  It's bro Gary aka The Grave or the rapture.  Rapture please!  

[MayMay1123]

and thoughtful hits another one out of the park! you should get paid for these! any way to turn this into a lucrative career?

[thoughtful]

1 hour ago, MayMay1123 said:

you should get paid for these! any way to turn this into a lucrative career? 

Thanks for the compliment.  But I have always suspected that, if I had to try to be funny for a living, my brain would freeze up and refuse to deliver.

Clearly, Gary has the same problem with the "go to work" and "be open-minded" and "learn your native language" parts of his mind.

[Four is Enough]

@thoughtful, You Are On FIRE!!

 

And not in a hellish way!

[keepercjr]

Good thing Gary clarifies that Becky is still his best friend even though she left facebook “due to something”.  We might have suspicions 

 

[Dandruff]

Does he realize he's supposed to be writing so that other people can understand him?  Not that I'd wish that on the public either, but what a mess.

Becky sells Plexus and left FB.  Considering her current situation, I wonder what she could possibly have found to be so offensive.  

[Tim-Tom Biblethumper]

Biscuits, Gravy, Pinto Beans, Potatoes AND Cornbread?  All in ONE day.  I would say Becky is trying to give Gary a coronary, if it weren't for the fact that they're "Best Friends".  

And thanks for the belly-laugh, @thoughtful 

[clese]

Awww he blocked me . Kinda relieved..but how will I find salvation without gary nostrils hollering at me?

[Spinosaurus]

You'll have to go to the camp he's going to mountain in the maintains if you want to get UNDER THE BLOOD OF GARY'S NOSTRILS.

[thoughtful]

I wonder if Gary and Becky have any fruit or green vegetables in their fridge.

4 hours ago, Spinosaurus said:

You'll have to go to the camp he's going to mountain in the maintains

I have the perfect job idea for Gary, if he'd only agree to work. He could be a mountainance worker!

 

 

[Carol]

OK, folks, maybe we're reading this FB situation all wrong.

Fabio Brown?

Freiderich Brandenburg?

Francis Blowhard?

Frank Berry?

So many possibilities but, whatever, Becky is still his best friend!

 

A Very Brief Pome for Gary

Is this the rapture?

Well I ain't sure

But it's fer sure

We need money

For Jesus

 

[keepercjr]

Ok folks.  I had no idea what chicken bog was so I looked it up.  Made with weens!! (Ok it is sausage but I bet Becky would make it with weens for sure)

[CTRLZero]

I make chicken bog fairly often, but didn't know it really had a name.  Who knew that Gary would teach me something...

[PumaLover]

OK folks, I have been looking for a recipe for flautas and I found... ween flautas!!! Just in case Becks and Bro want to try to go tex-mex one of these nights. 

[Black Aliss]

6 hours ago, Carol said:

A Very Brief Pome for Gary

Is this the rapture?

Well I ain't sure

But it's fer sure

We need money

For Jesus

 

I can't be the only FJer hearing this sung to Bohemian Rhapsody, can I?

5 hours ago, keepercjr said:

Ok folks.  I had no idea what chicken bog was so I looked it up.  Made with weens!! (Ok it is sausage but I bet Becky would make it with weens for sure)

That looks nothing like the Carolina bog that I've had. It's also a photo borrowed from another website (https://lifemadesimplebakes.com/2016/06/one-pot-chicken-bog/). That said, I'd totally eat this but I really like the versions with lots of vegetables (bell peppers, celery, onions, tomatoes)

[Dandruff]

Wonder what, if anything, Bro wouldn't eat.

[MarblesMom]

Their most recent live was so... awkward.

 

[Don'tlikekoolaid]

IKR!  Becky is making chocolate covered cherries and peanut butter balls in the kitchen of a house they are house sitting. Becky says she’s just happy to have a kitchen!  Gary you are an asshole!  That woman should have her own kitchen!

@Dandruff

Bro doesn’t eat chocolate!!!!!!!!!  The guy is not normal.

[keepercjr]

4 hours ago, Black Aliss said:

That looks nothing like the Carolina bog that I've had. It's also a photo borrowed from another website (https://lifemadesimplebakes.com/2016/06/one-pot-chicken-bog/). That said, I'd totally eat this but I really like the versions with lots of vegetables (bell peppers, celery, onions, tomatoes)

I just copied the picture from google search images.  it wasn't a pic gary posted.  Just to clarify.

[mango_fandango]

I felt inspired tonight, and went with a seasonal theme. 

Silent ween, holy ween

All is pink, so obscene 

All of FJ is in disgust 

At Bro Gary’s obvious lust

For the gross and the nas-ty!

For the gross and the nasty.

 

Silent ween, holy ween

Makes our faces turn so green

He is such a lazy leech

We don’t want to hear him preach

How his grammar is poor!

How his grammar is poor.

 

Silent ween, holy ween 

He clearly lacks the smartness gene

Always filming right up his nose

Makes no sense with his terrible prose

He is such a tool!

He is such a tool.

 

[Black Aliss]

1 hour ago, keepercjr said:

I just copied the picture from google search images.  it wasn't a pic gary posted.  Just to clarify.

oops. My bad. I thought it was part of Gary's post!

[AliceInFundyland]

On 12/13/2018 at 5:08 PM, Dandruff said:

Wonder what, if anything, Bro wouldn't eat.

Vegetables.

[Briefly]

FJ has totally corrupted me.  Every time I go to the grocery store, I think of Gwen Shamblin when I walk down the aisle with chips or cokes, I automatically now price butter because of Lori and today I was reminded of Gary when I walked past the lunchmeat aisle because that's where the hot dogs are stocked!

[FullOfGravy]

13 hours ago, Briefly said:

FJ has totally corrupted me.  Every time I go to the grocery store, I think of Gwen Shamblin when I walk down the aisle with chips or cokes, I automatically now price butter because of Lori and today I was reminded of Gary when I walked past the lunchmeat aisle because that's where the hot dogs are stocked!

You'll have to start bringing a bit of holy water to sprinkle on cans of vegetables, just to make sure you don't buy one with a resident demon.

[Lisafer]

14 hours ago, Briefly said:

FJ has totally corrupted me.  Every time I go to the grocery store, I think of Gwen Shamblin when I walk down the aisle with chips or cokes, I automatically now price butter because of Lori and today I was reminded of Gary when I walked past the lunchmeat aisle because that's where the hot dogs are stocked!

Right? Tater tots=Duggars. Green beans=JRod. Weens=Gary. Frozen burritos=Maxwells. The grocery store has become a frightening place, filled with fundie demons.