Lori Alexander 54: Embracing the Manosphere

[Sarah92]

On September 14, 2018 at 9:06 PM, KDA said:

Right now, I'm truly hating how Lori is telling everyone that when they take a step of faith and quit their jobs and come home, the Lord will provide! Newsflash: It doesn't work like that.

I am currently a SAHM. I was working, but I'm not any more. Stupidly, I decided to quit my job to focus on writing. But my father ended up in hospital at the other end of the country, I was unable to write, and I spent money we didn't have on travel expenses to be with him. We're relying solely on what hubby makes in our business.

It's Saturday, here. My hubby closes his shop in 2 minutes. He has made no sales all day. We are closed tomorrow. We will be open on Monday, which is usually the quietest day of the week and usually doesn't degenerate any/many sales. We will get *some* money on Tuesday, enough to buy groceries, at least. Tonight, I have no idea what we're going to eat. In the fridge we have half a bottle of milk, a tub of margarine, a loaf of bread, a measly amount of ham, a small amount of cheese, and some carrots. We also have a tin of spaghetti, half a dozen potatoes, some flour, and 4 eggs. That has to feed us today, tomorrow, and maybe Monday as well. We need food for the dog and cat as well. I can scrape together $5.20, which will buy the pets some food. Right now, I'm not quite sure how we are going to survive.

No Lori, the Lord DOES NOT provide for people who choose to quit their jobs. Please do not preach that He will, because it's just wrong. I can go without food for a couple of days. So can my husband. But I have 4 children, 2 of whom are growing teenagers, 2 are younger. They need to eat. Many, many others are in our situation all over the country and the world and stupid Lori is sitting there in her flash house, with plenty of nourishing food, a healthy bank account, and telling people to "have faith, God will provide". Utter bollocks. 

I came home. Admittedly, it was to write naughty books and not just keep the house (although I do that too,) but still.... I came home. Now we're all f*****g hungry.

I was gonna potentially suggest something called drop biscuits. I remember those appearing quite often when there was barely anything in the house to eat.  Goes well with soups and stews and makes the meal a bit more filling. Biscuits and gravy would be a cheap meal as well.  It helped me learn to try and always keep basic baking stocked in my kitchen. Flour and a few other ingredients can be a lifesaver, at least for my family they were. 

Also I'm sharing my favorite very simple bread recipe below. I swirl left over jam into the dough for a simple jam bread. But y'all might be able to tell why I love it so much lol. Got it from Pinterest 

Spoiler

 

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[SongRed7]

19 hours ago, lilwriter85 said:

She doesn't seem to have a problem with men attending graduate or professional schools and acquiring a lot of debt. Her son Stephen likely has debt from dental school and the orthodontic program that he attended. Lori is the type of person that doesn't realize that shit happens in life. Something could happen to Lori's son-in-law Ryan or her son Stephen and their families could be left with debts and ongoing expenses.

You are correct!  Dental school isn't cheap. We have friends whose husband is a dentist (not even an orthodonist which requires even more schooling)....They are in their early 50s. They live very modestly....and they are still paying his debt for dental school.

 

[Mellowing With Age]

51 minutes ago, SongRed7 said:

You are correct!  Dental school isn't cheap. We have friends whose husband is a dentist (not even an orthodonist which requires even more schooling)....They are in their early 50s. They live very modestly....and they are still paying his debt for dental school.

 

I know several dentists that had the military pay for their undergrad (ROTC) then went on to dental school (they do the same for medical school and veterinary school) where the military pays for all of their schooling (you have to be accepted into a school though) and then gives them $2,000 a month to live on. They come out owing a few years to the military and then they can leave, with zero student loans. I know one dentist who did this, then once he left, used his GI Bill to pay for his pediatric dentistry school. All schooling paid for by the military. 

Of course Ken and Lori's boys would never do that. They would have to play nicely with the females, and would probably have females as their commanders. We had a son who looked into the program for veterinary school but changed his mind later and went a different route.  

[PennySycamore]

@Sarah92,  if you are looking at Episcopal churches, you may want to avoid anything that calls itself an Anglican  church (at least in the US. Anglican churches in England are fine).  Most of the Anglican churches in the US are schismatic churches that split off after the Episcopal Church after the church elected Gene Robinson Bishop of New Hampshire.  Rev. Robinson is openly gay.  The particular part of the schism that my husband is part of does not ordain women although they used to because some of their new members had never gotten over the Episcopal Church ordaining women in the 70s.  None of these churches is considered a part of the Anglican communion.

@Mellowing With Age,  one of my OB/GYNs went to med school on a military scholarship.   My brother, on the other hand, went to vet school at UGA on the state compact that SC (and some of the other southern states) had with Georgia.  South Carolina covered his tuition and fees in the hopes that he would come back to SC to practice.  We needed vets, especially in rural and poor areas. and this was one way to get them

 

[lilwriter85]

3 hours ago, SongRed7 said:

You are correct!  Dental school isn't cheap. We have friends whose husband is a dentist (not even an orthodonist which requires even more schooling)....They are in their early 50s. They live very modestly....and they are still paying his debt for dental school.

 

I hear stories of people still paying off education related debts many years later. But, I bet Lori probably doesn't care if there is a chance that her son and son-in-law will be paying off debts for many years to come. 

I'm still pissed about her "debt free, non-tattooed virgins" post and my take is that if she's going to be pissy about women having education related debts she should apply the same to men. Of course, she won't.  

I do wonder if the "debt free" angle may have been a jab at her daughter in-law Emily who might have debt from college or from when she attended law school. I can see a situation where Lori may be fine with her son Stephen having debts, but she may be pissed if he has to pay for Emily's past debts. 

 

[feministxtian]

2 hours ago, Mellowing With Age said:

I know several dentists that had the military pay for their undergrad (ROTC) then went on to dental school (they do the same for medical school and veterinary school) where the military pays for all of their schooling (you have to be accepted into a school though) and then gives them $2,000 a month to live on. They come out owing a few years to the military and then they can leave, with zero student loans. I know one dentist who did this, then once he left, used his GI Bill to pay for his pediatric dentistry school. All schooling paid for by the military. 

I know so many doctors that have done this. Hub's endo in PHX did it, his PCP and mine both did it, our friends who are medical missionaries in Cambodia did it. 

Pretty much every doctor that practices in the VA system is x-military (IME). But, then again, I'm from a heavily military area (my hometown) and even here in LV, there's a big military presence (Nellis AFB and good old Area 51)

[AuntKrazy]

Among other flaws in the weekend posts that are beyond what I am going to address.  - I can't get past the "taught by society and even family to be loud, not to need a man, to be sexually promiscuous, and to take care of ourselves."

Seriously?  When did taking care of one's self become anything other than being a responsible adult?    If one cannot take care of one's self, then how is one supposed to take care of children?

And of course, following immediately on the heals of that, Lori is once again doubling down on the KJV only poor translation of "keepers at home".  Lori, we are offended by being called "Jezebels" for lives which do not conform to your interpretation of one phrase in Scripture that is taken out of context of a poor translation by yourself. You then use this to repeatedly to tell women who choose to worship God through the work of our hands differently than you do that this active worship of God with our gifts, talents and lives is sin.  You are calling our very worship of Jesus "sin".  I find this offensive.

Lori, you do realize that even Rahab, the prostitute, is listed in Jesus' lineage, right?  Your legalistic judgment of those who do nothing more than work hard for themselves and their families as part of their faith and worship of God makes YOU the false teacher.

 

[usmcmom]

3 hours ago, Mellowing With Age said:

I know several dentists that had the military pay for their undergrad (ROTC) then went on to dental school (they do the same for medical school and veterinary school) where the military pays for all of their schooling (you have to be accepted into a school though) and then gives them $2,000 a month to live on. They come out owing a few years to the military and then they can leave, with zero student loans. I know one dentist who did this, then once he left, used his GI Bill to pay for his pediatric dentistry school. All schooling paid for by the military. 

Of course Ken and Lori's boys would never do that. They would have to play nicely with the females, and would probably have females as their commanders. We had a son who looked into the program for veterinary school but changed his mind later and went a different route.  

My son graduates in December!! The GI Bill has been a godsend for him. He thinks he has worked it out so that he has enough remaining benefits to cover a Master's degree. Our home state also offers its own veterans education benefits. They have talked about relocating back here temporarily to take advantage of that. But it's a bit soon to think about that. We are just so thrilled he is finishig his degree. Not that we think a degree is a must have; it just took him a while to find his footing after discharge; so, to see him so excited about this is a huge victory for all of us. Re-entry into civilian life is no joke - we sure found that out. 

And you are right, no Alexander offspring would be the military type*.Remember, Ken believes high school athletics prepared his boys to fight a war; so we can all sleep well tonight, knowing his sons are standing watch. *insert GIGANTIC eye roll here."

*No shame in not pursuing a military career. It certainly is not for everybody. It's just Ken's smugness that makes me stabby. 

[cindyluvs24]

I think Lori harps against wimminz being prepared to take care of themselves because deep down, she feels she can't.   She wasn't particularly stellar in HS, college, teaching, and has no friends to speak of.  Sure she can go on and on about how dedicated she is to her home. She's got nowhere else she needs to be.  Remember this is a gal in her 50's who couldn't prep a "go bag" and get in her car and drive away when the fires were coming without calling a man for help.

[smittykins]

18 hours ago, kpmom said:

I'm a bit biased, but the Episcopal Church is great, Sarah92, I agree!  If you're looking to take a break, I think you'll find a lot to like there.

Not the least of which is women are included in all aspects of the Church, including the priesthood.

And yes, as onemama said, the head clergy is the rector.

Lori would positively stroke out if she went to my Episcopal church--our new priest is a GAY MAN. 

[SuperNova]

The opening paragraph to today's blog, "Were old-fashioned women happier?":

Spoiler

There is an interesting article in the Daily Mail about a woman who just turned 60 years old and compared herself to her mother back when she turned 60 years old. This woman, Liz Jones, is beautiful and puts me to shame (since I just turned 60 years old) if we were measuring only by appearance. She is in perfect shape and looks amazing for her age but at what cost? (She has spent a TON of money on herself to look this way!)

So Lori is so very obviously jealous of Liz Jones. I clicked the link and she really does look great at 60, actually she looks great, period. So of course Lori has to take her down a few notches because Lori herself looks like a leather handbag and can't stand that Liz looks fabulous.

Besides looking fabulous though, Liz is totally neurotic. She rambles on and on about all the beauty routines that her mother skipped out on, what her mother ate, how she walked, her false teeth, what she wore (a home sewn shift, gasp!). It passes the point of comparing herself to her mom at 60 and obviously shows the root of her insecurity. Cringy at best and I can see why Lori picked this article.

Both Lori and Liz miss the mark. You don't have to be the hardlining stay at home judgy bitch and you don't have to be a career focused and image obsessed woman. These two are the bookends of the spectrum. As an aside, I'm really starting to hate Lori's commenter, A Lady Of Reason. She's sexist, racist, and classist:

"Since they were able to be free to be women, and not a male copy, then probably! I adore the beautiful dresses they wore, even working class girls!"

[Alisamer]

1 hour ago, AuntKrazy said:

I can't get past the "taught by society and even family to be loud, not to need a man, to be sexually promiscuous, and to take care of ourselves."

My grandmother used to tell us constantly "Don't ever get married, all a man wants is a SLAVE." (She and grandpa were hot and cold through the years, sometimes lovey, sometimes driving to church separately just to go to the same sunday school class.) So yeah, I guess I was taught by my family not to need a man. My father is proud that my sisters and I are able to take care of ourselves, do basic home repairs, and all sorts of other things. In fact, he often these days calls me to ask advice about stuff I'm good at, same as how I call him to ask advice when my car makes a strange noise.

I can't imagine why anyone would listen to Lori's rambling. She's the one so dumb she couldn't evacuate a fire without being told what to do by someone with a penis. She's the one who is so lazy she sabotaged her birth control so she could stay home instead of working, while the nanny and housekeeper "kept her home". She's the one who spent her mother's last hours on earth posting "viral" content and being contentious on the internet while on vacation several states away. She's the one who tells her followers that to be Godly they must do what she says, even if it leads to abject poverty. She's the one who is so self-absorbed that she cannot see anyone else's situation or point of view.

Why would anyone be proud of the fact that they can't take care of themselves? That if her husband died suddenly she would immediately become a burden on her children, because she's unable to survive on her own? 

Lori should be ashamed of herself, not shaming other women.

[Free Jana Duggar]

1 hour ago, cindyluvs24 said:

Remember this is a gal in her 50's who couldn't prep a "go bag" and get in her car and drive away when the fires were coming without calling a man for help.

That has always bugged me. I'm not sure how bad the fire was, but she could have been putting someone else in danger by having him have to come get her instead of leaving on her own. I can't understand how Lori wouldn't know how to at least pack a change of clothes and her toothbrush.  She packs for Door County every year.

[feministxtian]

2 hours ago, AuntKrazy said:

I can't get past the "taught by society and even family to be loud, not to need a man, to be sexually promiscuous, and to take care of ourselves."

Excuse me? Mr. Xtian knows that I'm with him because I WANT to be with him. I don't "need" him...as a bank account with benefits. He goes a bit goofy because I'm so fucking independent...and won't ask for help if (literally) my life depends on it (see mental health issues and refusing to make an appointment b/c I didn't want to ask him for the money). He gets so damn mad at me over it! 

But then again, I didn't marry Mr. Xtian for his bank account (he was more broke than I was when we got married). He's cute, he makes me laugh and he spoils me rotten...and for some insane reason loves me beyond all rationality. THAT is why I married him. THAT is why we've stuck it out during some seriously hard times. I can't imagine my life without him and I wake up every damn day thankful that he's still here (and not for his fucking bank account). 

[SongRed7]

15 minutes ago, SuperNova said:

Both Lori and Liz miss the mark. You don't have to be the hardlining stay at home judgy bitch and you don't have to be a career focused and image obsessed woman. These two are the bookends of the spectrum

100%  I read the post and I HATE HATE HATE how she thinks one person stands for all of us women/moms who choose/MUST work to support our families. What a joke!  My life is NOTHING like that at all.   And then the commenters. I hate the one who said she had "three uncashed paychecks" in her purse and questioned herself why she was working!  HAHA....like that happens. Almost every woman I know works full or part time because they absolutely need the money.  I can't imagine having one uncashed paycheck in my purse, let alone three.  In fact, most of them are spent even before they are cashed (direct deposited)...

she really does believe this nonsense I'm sure. 

 

[feministxtian]

1 hour ago, SongRed7 said:

I hate the one who said she had "three uncashed paychecks" in her purse and questioned herself why she was working!  HAHA....like that happens. Almost every woman I know works full or part time because they absolutely need the money.  I can't imagine having one uncashed paycheck in my purse, let alone three.  In fact, most of them are spent even before they are cashed (direct deposited)...

I have my bills scheduled in the bill pay across the whole month (paydays). Admittedly, hub's paychecks from his job are savings and play money but...there's no fucking way I'd have three uncashed paychecks in my purse. Direct deposit is a wonderful thing...our checking accounts serve to facilitate money re-distribution...you know, for the little things like rent, utility bills, car insurance...the little unimportant things in life. 

Re: the bolded...they're not "my bills"...they're OUR bills. 

[quiversR4hunting]

32 minutes ago, SongRed7 said:

"three uncashed paychecks" in her purse

back before direct deposit (mid 90s) I sometimes had uncashed paychecks but the only reason I hadn't taken them to the bank was that I waited tables and my paychecks for 2 weeks were maybe $50 (after taxes were taken out - they had to tax my claimed tips). My tips for one lunch shift was $40-60 and one dinner shift on the weekend were $80 to over $100. I usually worked 5 shifts a week (and went to college full-time).

Now as a working adult with a "9-5" job (I wish I was only at work 8 hours!), my paycheck is spent (or allotted to) before it gets deposited.

[Koala]

Quote

One day I had 3 paychecks, not cashed in my wallet and I told.my hisband...
"I want to just throw these into the wood stove, they mean nothing"

 Oh, please honey!  That happens to me all.the.time.  In fact, just this morning I noticed my purse was heavier than usual.  Turned out, I had several hundred dollars in my wallet.  You can well imagine how disgusted I was, but not to worry, because a garbage can was close at hand, and I tossed it right in (like the godly woman I am)!  I mean sure, there are starving people all over the world, but how is money going to help with that?  It means NOTHING.  Definitely tossing it in the wood stove was a great idea.  I'll have to file that away for the next time I find myself burdened w/ money I don't want.

Help a girl out, here.  Where does Lori find these crazy people?

 

[delphinium65]

55 minutes ago, SongRed7 said:

And then the commenters. I hate the one who said she had "three uncashed paychecks" in her purse and questioned herself why she was working!

Where is that? I looked on Lori's blog and FB, and didn't find it.  Of course when I find it, I'll be kicking myself and wondering how I could have missed it.  

[Lgirlrocks]

6 minutes ago, delphinium65 said:

Where is that? I looked on Lori's blog and FB, and didn't find it.  Of course when I find it, I'll be kicking myself and wondering how I could have missed it.  

It’s under We’re Old Fashion women happier. 

[delphinium65]

2 minutes ago, Lgirlrocks said:

It’s under We’re Old Fashion women happier. 

Thank you, very much.  And now I am kicking myself, very thoroughly, for not finding it myself!  

As for the comment itself...Diana clearly has no idea how other women live if she could let 3 paychecks accumulate without bothering to cash them.  The sheer arrogance, when she so obviously has no idea WTF she's talking about...words fail me, and that doesn't happen very often.   

[Alisamer]

Seriously, if anyone has a few uncashed paychecks sitting around that they don't want, sign them over to me! 

Honestly, when I used to get paychecks, they got deposited the moment I got them in my hands. Literally, once you could deposit them using the app on your phone. Now my pay is direct deposited, and almost all of it is spoken for or spent before it gets in there. My depression is getting better, but between years of retail therapy and this year's dental fiascos, I need every penny as soon as I can get it.

[Imrlgoddess]

Mini-rant that is somewhat on topic:  My company still issues checks without direct deposit.  But for anyone who didn't cash or deposit theirs Friday, they're screwed today.  Bank levy's aren't announced and the business suddenly finds itself with a frozen account...sounds fun don't it?  They preach and preach about going into business for yourself or sticking with the family business....well, just because one family member was honest doesn't mean they all were.  And the later generations get to pay for the sins of the previous.  

Three paychecks uncashed?  I guess she had the privilege of working for fun money.  

[FullOfGravy]

1 hour ago, Koala said:

One day I had 3 paychecks, not cashed in my wallet and I told.my hisband...
"I want to just throw these into the wood stove, they mean nothing"

I'll take "things that definitely happened; why would anyone think otherwise?" for 200, Alex.

[Mellowing With Age]

 

Quote

My overriding feeling, as the Big Day came and went last week, was that my generation of women was sold a lie. We were told our mothers’ lives were disgracefully submissive. We were told we must battle our bodies into submission, land a career in order to hold all the power.

I took this paragraph from the article Lori linked to. "We were told we must battle our bodies into submission...." Sounds just what Lori teaches

Spoiler

Our bodies are the temples of the Holy Spirit and as such, we are called to discipline our bodies and make them our slaves. I know it’s difficult in this day where there is an abundance of food but we must still never give up the struggle. I have four close friends around my age who have struggled with their weight their entire lives until a few years ago or so. How did they finally manage to not overeat and be overweight? They all joined Weight Watchers or had some other type of accountability group because having accountability and learning the value of portion control are extremely important in the battle over weight. Without these two things, it will likely be impossible for most of you to ever achieve the weight you desire.

I