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Jellybean

John Shrader 16: Flying Away in That No-Engine Plane

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Happy
Jellybean

Continued from here:

Thanks to @bertneefor the thread title. 

John has been so quiet that I almost questioned the need for a new thread, but I’m sure we’ll fill it soon enough. 

John has apparently asked for funds to fix the seats (!) on his kit plane that was in pretty bad shape, the last we heard. He may also need to renew his pilots licence, as it’s been about three years since he received it (thanks @Bethella), and according to @gustava, it needs to be renewed with a flight check every two years. Sigh. So haphazard. So John.

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Nervous
Palimpsest

It's even worse than that, @Jellybean.  His US pilot license, even if he had renewed it, isn't valid in Zambia.  He needs to take and pass the Zambian test to fly that plane.

I think this must be the longest time Shrader has ever stayed silent.  He must be in deep straits to have refrained from boasting about his "accomplishments" for so long.  

I am pining away due to the lack of information.  Has Bro. Theophil smelled a rat yet?  Has John refused more rides to dying Zambians?  How much more African wildlife has John slaughtered?  Have more converts run away?  How many funerals has John preached at since December?  How much toilet paper has been distributed?

Heck, I haven't even had a Shrader pome to snark on for weeks!

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Depressed
formergothardite

John may be languishing in despair, but Rea is doing well. 

He is building a new church that will even have flush toilets. He needs $6,500 more to finish the church please pray about sending money. He is also helping host a medical clinic where people will get preached at while seeking medical care. He is inviting Americans who do not even need to have a medical background to fly over to assist with soul winning. People who arrive will a day of intensive soul winning classes, then spend 10 or more hours helping a more experienced soul winner, then they will be allowed to preach at up to 100 people a day as they arrive to get medical care. 

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Howl

Somebody's got to do it! Those souls won't win themselves! 

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Depressed
Gobsmacked
23 minutes ago, formergothardite said:

John may be languishing in despair, but Rea is doing well. 

He is building a new church that will even have flush toilets. He needs $6,500 more to finish the church please pray about sending money. He is also helping host a medical clinic where people will get preached at while seeking medical care. He is inviting Americans who do not even need to have a medical background to fly over to assist with soul winning. People who arrive will a day of intensive soul winning classes, then spend 10 or more hours helping a more experienced soul winner, then they will be allowed to preach at up to 100 people a day as they arrive to get medical care. 

I hope someone over there reports him to the immigration authorities ASAP and they jump all over him. The Medical clinic idea is good as long as volunteers hold valid up-to-date qualifications. But preaching to folk who are not feeling well? That is a low move even for creeps like Rea. 

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Depressed
formergothardite

They are planning it with this medical ministry. 

Quote

One of the most exciting ways for non medical personnel to be involved is to assist in the vision clinics. We train non medical persons to use a laser autorefractor and focometer to measure eye refractions in the vision clinics.  We take them through the process of selecting the correct pair of glasses based on the prescription obtained. 

Can someone with no training really be trained to do it properly in just one day? 

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SPHASH

I hate to say this but even the Maxwells are more interesting than Shrader at this point.

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OhNoNike
18 minutes ago, SPHASH said:

I hate to say this but even the Maxwells are more interesting than Shrader at this point.

Don’t worry. I’m sure Sarah will soon have a new series on paint drying with a teaser about how to clean a paint roller that will never come. 

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Depressed
Gobsmacked

Still no John? This is not good enough. Light entertainment is required after reading Trump news for a few evenings. For some reason I can't veiw Bro Gary vids either so I'm missing a daily giggle or three.

Hmph John. Please do better. 

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Depressed
formergothardite

This reminds me of John and his accordion

885fc7d572cc30ffc646951b9f926be1.jpg

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Nervous
Palimpsest

I've been cleaning so:

John's Favorite Things

♫♪♬

Sermons on Sunday and poems I've written
Bright smiles on donors - with me they are smitten
Lots of donations not tied up with strings
These are a few of my favorite things

Brown colored converts and crisp paper money
Troopies and trailers - for me they're like honey
Planes that can fly 'cos I grifted new wings
These are a few of my favorite things.

Snakes in the garden I can kill with five bashes
Donors who help me to find where the cash is
Lots of care packages filled up with snacks
The humpers don't mind - no skin of their backs

When FJ laughs, when the snark stings
When I'm feeling bad
I simply remember my favorite things
And then I don't feel so sad

(Sorry Rodgers and Hammerstein)

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Enraged
Curious
On 5/22/2018 at 4:37 PM, Palimpsest said:

I've been cleaning so:

John's Favorite Things

♫♪♬

Sermons on Sunday and poems I've written
Bright smiles on donors - with me they are smitten
Lots of donations not tied up with strings
These are a few of my favorite things

Brown colored converts and crisp paper money
Troopies and trailers - for me they're like honey
Planes that can fly 'cos I grifted new wings
These are a few of my favorite things.

Snakes in the garden I can kill with five bashes
Donors who help me to find where the cash is
Lots of care packages filled up with snacks
The humpers don't mind - no skin of their backs

When FJ laughs, when the snark stings
When I'm feeling bad
I simply remember my favorite things
And then I don't feel so sad

(Sorry Rodgers and Hammerstein)

Do you get the car commercial that uses a version of My Favorite Things?  Because I basically watch one channel I get the same damn commercials all. day. long.   That car commercial (and is it just me or do car commercials make zero sense.  Sometimes a commercial comes on and I'm not sure what they are trying to sell...it's always a car).  

This will give me new lyrics because I'm so over My Favorite Things thanks to that commercial.  Last night, my husband was complaining about it and it came on like 4 times between that point and when he went to bed.  I screamed from the other room "Isn't this a christmas song?  why are they playing it now?"   This is when I had to admit my dirty little secret ... I have never watched the Sound of Music start to finish.   He tried to kick me out, but I reminded him of all the iconic movies (ok maybe cult classics) that he's never seen and I did know it has Julie Andrews and Christopher Plummer in it, so I redeemed myself enough to stay ;) 

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Nervous
Palimpsest
33 minutes ago, Curious said:

Do you get the car commercial that uses a version of My Favorite Things? 

Not that I'm aware of, but a TV commercial may have sparked that particular earworm.  The dogs were watching TV while I was dusting the ceiling fan.  Miss W likes Animal Planet. ;)

And shame on you for never having watched Sound of Music all the way through!

 

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Happy
Jellybean

I love Sound of Music. Love it. I thought I was slow on the uptake, having not seen it until I was 19.

I still need to catch up on so many films from the 80s, 90s and 00s. I’m good at some old films, but new ones? Shockingly bad. I didn’t see Star Wars (the original trilogy) until last year. 

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Eclipse

I went on the Sound of Music tour when I visit Salzburg 6 years ago. I regret nothing about that decision.

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Ozlsn
On 5/23/2018 at 4:08 AM, Gobsmacked said:

Still no John? This is not good enough. Light entertainment is required after reading Trump news for a few evenings. For some reason I can't veiw Bro Gary vids either so I'm missing a daily giggle or three.

Hmph John. Please do better. 

I know, right?? C'mon John, tell us about your Glorious Mission! Tell us about the plane! Tell us how you've found accordion lovers in the Zambian... urban centres! At least give us an update on how Esther and the kids are going!!

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Waffle Time
squiddysquid

Fun fact: Most Europeans don't know about Sound of Music.

It's crazy popular everywhere else, US, Australia, Africa, Asia... but not there.

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subsaharanafrica
Posted (edited)

He’s been writing hymns. He made them public but has made his page private due to “extreme haters who’ve targeted us”. 

Edited by subsaharanafrica
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Depressed
formergothardite

John is back to writing hymns! Please give us a video of you banging on the piano singing these, John.

Quote

Go forth with weeping, preaching the Gospel
Caring for lost souls, just as Christ did
Don't force decisions, God gives the increase
Lest two-fold more then, children of hell.

Quote

It both captures my passion for missions, and also strikes a blow at the heretical false Calvinist/Augustinian doctrine of "limited atonement."

I believe that the only thing it strikes a blow at is quality hymns. 

These all seem like those super difficult to sing hymns that never got sung but if they did it was mostly the church mumbling along while the music director sang it alone. 

You are no Fanny Crosby, John. 

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Nervous
Palimpsest

I think you could sing the first one to the tune of "On Top of Old Smokey."  :5624796c41285_DastardlyEviledevil:

Quote

 

"Fruitful In Christ"
John 15:1-8

Verse 1:
Found in the Bible, God gives a picture
He's like a Gardener, Christ like a Vine
Every believer, with true salvation
Pictured as branches, in Christ the Vine.

Chorus:
Fruitful in Christ, abiding still
Filled with the Bible, that is God's Will
Christ said the Father, receives much Glory
When we abiding, bring forth much fruit.

 

 

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Waffle Time
squiddysquid

Well be fruitful and multiply is the only thing John accomplished (or rather Esther did).

Won't let us forget that he failed at everything else though.

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Nervous
Palimpsest
6 hours ago, squiddysquid said:

Fun fact: Most Europeans don't know about Sound of Music.

 It's crazy popular everywhere else, US, Australia, Africa, Asia... but not there.

I think it is still popular in the UK.  Most Austrians apparently hate it, except for the tourist dollars it brings in, and the family dislike it because they say it misrepresents Georg Von Trapp, who was apparently a sweet and quiet gentleman.

I thought John had heard my plea for more snark material, but he only made the hymns public so people can share them.

I think we need to send John his "Persecuted by FJ" badge.  He can pin it to his silly safari hat.  He's not gone private because of local attacks by Satan or immigration clamping down.  It is the "extreme haters" that have targeted him.  One of his humpers corrected him.  Apparently we are the "intolerant toleration proponents."

I never said I was tolerant about bad missionary behavior, John-boy.

And both John's new hymns can be sung to On Top of Old Smokey if you try hard!  "Lord of the Harvest" has better rhymes than usual, but John will never really understand meter.

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formergothardite
Posted (edited)

Is John's work for Christ so weak that it can't stand up to extreme hate? He is forced then to hide is light under a bushel so only believers can see it? Oh John, you fail in ever single way at being a missionary. You can't even be a FB missionary. 

What has really happened is that John isn't doing crap and it bothers him that the "haters" point that out. 

Matthew 5:16 John, you are ignoring that verse. 

Edited by formergothardite
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Milly-Molly-Mandy
Posted (edited)

I have a hunch he’s trying to leave. Probably not back to the USA if he can help it but some other nation where he can start ‘fresh’ as he’s burnt all his bridges in Zambia. 

 I can’t see him wanting to go back to the USA where he’s just a failed missionary with a sketchy job history and large family living in... well poverty to be honest.  He has a better life in Africa where he is well regarded just because he is white Christian and in Africa and get sent lots of money and other gifts. 

 

How many people does he claim to have saved now? 1? ALL that money spent on his family. Hundreds of thousands of dollars. Far out. What a waste. 

Edited by Milly-Molly-Mandy
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Nervous
Palimpsest
33 minutes ago, Milly-Molly-Mandy said:

How many people does he claim to have saved now? 1? ALL that money spent on his family. Hundreds of thousands of dollars. Far out. What a waste. 

Well, 1 is about what Livingstone saved.

John thinks we are extreme haters because we have kept a rough count on all the money spent on his vanity mission over the years.  And I'm sure even our biggest estimates fall short of the reality.

We also keep track of his failures - the ones he actually admits to - and that is very embarrassing because he wants everyone to forget about them.  Thus he tries to wipe humiliating stuff from the record.

We are not haters.  We merely document his selfish and self-serving antics and seek the truth.  With humor, unless he drives us into justifiable rage. 

If you are a con-man like John having people like us around is ... awkward.

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