Lori Alexander 43: Pepper and Darkness

[teachergirl]

You know who NEVER defends them? Their children.

[Free Jana Duggar]

13 minutes ago, teachergirl said:

You know who NEVER defends them? Their children.

I think  one of the daughters did after the raisin incident, but that is all I know of.

[jerkit]

56 minutes ago, teachergirl said:

You know who NEVER defends them? Their children.

I know more about Lori and kens sex Life than literally any other couple on the planet. If I were their kid, I wouldn’t go near the blog.

[Anna Arkadyevna]

I've been over there on 2.0 arguing with Ken and Lori's Swedish fanboy (Not even Ken, who is totes soooo much more hard-headed and dim) and my God!  The thick-headed, tunnel-visioned, tiny, tiny thinking!  I've observed lots of egal-comp discussion before, but never engaged in it, and I just don't think I can continue.  He's a full-on idiot!  I had more fruitful discussions when my kids were toddlers involving vegetables!  Probably because they were so much more open-minded and intellectually honest.

[HoneyBunny]

They’re both full-on idiots. Who replaces their kitchen countertops but leaves a dishwasher that doesn’t work?  That’s just stupid. They obviously have no idea about how much work it would have saved....well, someone (obviously not them) if they had simply had that one removed and replaced before the new counters went in. 

They don’t have to use the new dishwasher (I get that, for two people, especially when Lazy Lori rarely actually COOKS anything, handwashing is easier and faster). But when they pick up and move to be the Pearls’ new BFFs in Tennessee, it might be better to have a new, little used dishwasher in the kitchen instead of a broken one when they sell their house.  Buy a cheap one even. Just have a working dishwasher in a remodeled kitchen!

As my dad used to say, if they had a brain cell, it’d be lonely.

And let’s consider (again, I know) the cracked counters and rusting sink. WTF did they do to that kitchen for that to happen? I have the original laminate counters and sink in my 30-year old kitchen and they are in nearly new condition. What ever happened to living frugally and caring for what you have?  Oh, that’s right. It’s another example of ‘Do as I say, not as I do’. 

[crawfishgirl]

2 hours ago, Chocolatedefrauded said:

I have a similar story. In 1982, in my high school office, I was talking about selecting a college. The school superintendent, whose son was in my class & his daughter a year younger, told me he did not see the point of women going to college since they will just get married later & stop working to take care of their kids.

This was a small, rural district. My mind still boggles at the thought of an educator being against half the population getting an education. I did argue with him about it to no avail.

the funny thing is I think his daughter is now a divorced mother so she probably works.

My father told me the same thing one day.  I was so infuriated that all I did was yell a horrible noise before I could start discussing it with words....

I did go to college, but it was many years ago, before the incredible tuition rates of today.  I was fortunate to live in the same city as my state's flagship university, so I also saved a lot of money by living at my parent's house.

[lilwriter85]

42 minutes ago, HoneyBunny said:

They’re both full-on idiots. Who replaces their kitchen countertops but leaves a dishwasher that doesn’t work?  That’s just stupid. They obviously have no idea about how much work it would have saved....well, someone (obviously not them) if they had simply had that one removed and replaced before the new counters went in. 

They don’t have to use the new dishwasher (I get that, for two people, especially when Lazy Lori rarely actually COOKS anything, handwashing is easier and faster). But when they pick up and move to be the Pearls’ new BFFs in Tennessee, it might be better to have a new, little used dishwasher in the kitchen instead of a broken one when they sell their house.  Buy a cheap one even. Just have a working dishwasher in a remodeled kitchen!

As my dad used to say, if they had a brain cell, it’d be lonely.

And let’s consider (again, I know) the cracked counters and rusting sink. WTF did they do to that kitchen for that to happen? I have the original laminate counters and sink in my 30-year old kitchen and they are in nearly new condition. What ever happened to living frugally and caring for what you have?  Oh, that’s right. It’s another example of ‘Do as I say, not as I do’. 

Didn't Lori mentioning something about messing up the sink or counters to get the kitchen remodel?

The part about the dishwasher is dumb. If they do try to sell the house and work with a real estate agent, the agent might laugh behind their backs at non-working dishwasher.

I don't think they have ever really lived frugally despite Kenny boy's recent claims. If they actually did that kitchen would have stayed in good condition. Also, Ken was going on and on about men fixing things. But, if he himself has so much pride about that- why didn't he do the kitchen remodeling work on his own to show that he does those things?

 

[Hisey]

2 hours ago, Free Jana Duggar said:

I think  one of the daughters did after the raisin incident, but that is all I know of.

Alyssa, Ryan and Steven have never said a word on the blog or facebook. Never. Unless it was under a fake name.

Cassi and Erin commented once or twice when the blog was new, and Cassi defended her mom in an Amazon review comment. I think they did so early on when they were shocked at some pushback (someone doesn't like my mom's book, that we're all so proud of ?!) but then backed away when things got messy.

[lilwriter85]

10 minutes ago, Hisey said:

Alyssa, Ryan and Steven have never said a word on the blog or facebook. Never. Unless it was under a fake name.

Cassi and Erin commented once or twice when the blog was new, and Cassi defended her mom in an Amazon review comment. I think they did so early on when they were shocked at some pushback (someone doesn't like my mom's book, that we're all so proud of ?!) but then backed away when things got messy.

Didn't the other DIL Emily defend Lori on Facebook?

 

[refugee]

3 hours ago, Chocolatedefrauded said:

I have a similar story. In 1982, in my high school office, I was talking about selecting a college. The school superintendent, whose son was in my class & his daughter a year younger, told me he did not see the point of women going to college since they will just get married later & stop working to take care of their kids.

This was a small, rural district. My mind still boggles at the thought of an educator being against half the population getting an education. I did argue with him about it to no avail.

the funny thing is I think his daughter is now a divorced mother so she probably works.

That’s one of the reasons employers have used for decades for not paying or promoting women for doing equal or superior work. Because they’re just going to get married and quit, or if married, they’re just going to have babies and quit, or if they have children, they’re going to be too distracted by motherhood to give proper attention to the job.

Songs like “I am woman, hear me roar” and the “woman” song with the lyric, “I can bring home the bacon, fry it up in a pan” were pushback—in direct contrast to “Time to get ready for love” with the lyric “for wives should always be lovers, too. Run to his arms the moment he comes home to you! He’s almost here....”

I’m surprised the patriarchy didn’t adopt that one as their anthem.

[Sarah92]

I was digging last night and her daughter Alyssa doesn't even seem to follow theTransformedWife on Instagram. Idk why she really chooses not to but to me this speaks volumes. I'm blocked from her page now though because I finally commented on something. I cropped my name out so I cut out the first part of what I said which was "a women's value doesn't diminish..." . 

 

Spoiler

 

 

 

 

[delphinium65]

1 minute ago, Sarah92 said:

I was digging last night and her daughter Alyssa doesn't even seem to follow theTransformedWife on Instagram. Idk why she really chooses not to but to me this speaks volumes. I'm blocked from her page now though because I finally commented on something. I cropped my name out so I cut out the first part of what I said which was "a women's value doesn't diminish..."

'To assume we know someone's heart without hearing their story is foolishness.'  True that, and that's exactly what Lori does.  

[Hisey]

1 hour ago, lilwriter85 said:

Didn't the other DIL Emily defend Lori on Facebook?

 

Oh, yeah. Emily spoke up on an Amazon review, and maybe on facebook? I don't remember. However, all the kids are remarkably silent now.

And as for Emily and Erin. .  I can't imagine knowing so much about my in-laws sex life! I really can't!

[Coconut Flan]

Because we're trying to get more new threads, please feel free to start up a new thread with each blog post or new Facebook challenge from Ken or whatever new thing she does.   Discussion for Lori's latest blog post is over here:

 

[livinglongerthanyou]

I read some of her drivel today about adopting a kitten. I guess the house she went too was "filthy" and the kittens weren't litter box trained.....maybe they were too young or the litter box was not kept clean. Anyway, she wrote how the cat and kittens had "pee peed" and "poo pooed" everywhere. JFC.....she thinks she's writing to toddlers! She wrote it more than once and I just shook my head. Seriously? When I take my dog out I tell her "go potty", but I can't imagine talking about how she pee peed and poo pooed. 

[nokidsmom]

On 4/7/2018 at 7:56 AM, teachergirl said:

You know who NEVER defends them? Their children.

All that to me is quite telling.  Seems the kids may know to stay away from their parents' crazy when they can.  There certainly must be situations where they can't avoid it but this one is easy.  Just don't go there. 

Rufus knows how hard it must be just to have these two lovely people as their parents.

[polecat]

On 4/7/2018 at 9:42 AM, HoneyBunny said:

They’re both full-on idiots. Who replaces their kitchen countertops but leaves a dishwasher that doesn’t work?  That’s just stupid. They obviously have no idea about how much work it would have saved....well, someone (obviously not them) if they had simply had that one removed and replaced before the new counters went in. 

They don’t have to use the new dishwasher (I get that, for two people, especially when Lazy Lori rarely actually COOKS anything, handwashing is easier and faster). But when they pick up and move to be the Pearls’ new BFFs in Tennessee, it might be better to have a new, little used dishwasher in the kitchen instead of a broken one when they sell their house.  Buy a cheap one even. Just have a working dishwasher in a remodeled kitchen!

As my dad used to say, if they had a brain cell, it’d be lonely.

And let’s consider (again, I know) the cracked counters and rusting sink. WTF did they do to that kitchen for that to happen? I have the original laminate counters and sink in my 30-year old kitchen and they are in nearly new condition. What ever happened to living frugally and caring for what you have?  Oh, that’s right. It’s another example of ‘Do as I say, not as I do’. 

2

I seem to recall she'd set hot pans directly on the countertop rather than on trivets or hot pads. Which, of course, destroyed the countertops. 

I'm midway through redoing my kitchen, and I've done all the work myself. Other than the two appliances we bought (which I needed Mr. Polecat to bring home and set up for me), I've done all the prep work, sanding, priming, painting, etc. all alone. Not only did it save us a ton of money, but it's also felt fantastic to do. I feel incredibly accomplished especially because I do have serious health problems and it's *not* been an easy thing to do.

Lori doesn't take care of anything she has because it's so easy for her to replace things. See: the carpets she got so she doesn't need to vacuum regularly. She's excellent at preaching to other people about being frugal, but she's not so good at actually living it. If she actually *had* to take care of her things to make them last, I think she'd need smelling salts.

[PennySycamore]

@polecat, I am in awe of your renovating your kitchen yourself!  

[mango_fandango]

The daughters-in-*law* CHOSE to be a part of this family. The biological kids did not choose to be born to Lori and Ken. 

[Jellybean]

Well yes, sort-of, but when you fall in love with someone it’s hard to decide they’re not worth it because of their parents

[mango_fandango]

That is true, I guess. There is always the option of limiting/cutting contact with the truly awful parents/in-laws, but that's not a decision to be entered lightly. I've never had a relationship so I haven't had to meet another half's parents, but I can imagine it must be hard if you love your partner but do not get along at all with their parents.

[lilwriter85]

I think if any of Lori's DILs or SILs have issues with her, the likely candidate is Erin. I get that feeling based on the fact that Erin has a business which takes up a lot of her time and we know she has done work trips and left the kids in the care of relatives. Lori may be pissed that Erin isn't devoting all her time to the kids. But, Erin may feel the need to contribute to the household income as Ryan is in law school and they also live in an expensive state.

Thekids' spouses probably agree with a lot of Loriken's beliefs, but they might not be as hardcore as Loriken. I'm also sure Lori's spoiled brat attitude is likely turn off to them.

[Hisey]

2 hours ago, lilwriter85 said:

I think if any of Lori's DILs or SILs have issues with her, the likely candidate is Erin. I get that feeling based on the fact that Erin has a business which takes up a lot of her time and we know she has done work trips and left the kids in the care of relatives. Lori may be pissed that Erin isn't devoting all her time to the kids. But, Erin may feel the need to contribute to the household income as Ryan is in law school and they also live in an expensive state.

Thekids' spouses probably agree with a lot of Loriken's beliefs, but they might not be as hardcore as Loriken. I'm also sure Lori's spoiled brat attitude is likely turn off to them.

Erin seems to leave her kids with Lori CONSTANTLY. I don't think she can disagree too much with Lori.

I suspect that Steven (who seems to be the most functional one, along with Alyssa) does not like or agree with his mother. If you watch his wedding video, his mother clutches his arm and chatters, while he turns his head away. I got the feeling he couldn't stand her, but keeps sweet for the sake of family relations. And you notice he's moved far, far away, about as far away as you can go in the US. I understand his father was friends with the older orthodontist Steven works with, and probably helped him buy the practice. Still, there were lots of other places Steven could've worked, places like Texas or Arizona, with better weather and closer to home.

I also predict that if any of her kids divorce, it will be him. His wife seems very narcissistic.

[jerkit]

I get the sense Cassi is the one practicing the hardcore patriarchy that Lori espouses. The others may be complementarian in the way “normal” evangelicals are - in mostly name, but not so much in practice. 

[lilwriter85]

8 hours ago, Hisey said:

Erin seems to leave her kids with Lori CONSTANTLY. I don't think she can disagree too much with Lori.

I suspect that Steven (who seems to be the most functional one, along with Alyssa) does not like or agree with his mother. If you watch his wedding video, his mother clutches his arm and chatters, while he turns his head away. I got the feeling he couldn't stand her, but keeps sweet for the sake of family relations. And you notice he's moved far, far away, about as far away as you can go in the US. I understand his father was friends with the older orthodontist Steven works with, and probably helped him buy the practice. Still, there were lots of other places Steven could've worked, places like Texas or Arizona, with better weather and closer to home.

I also predict that if any of her kids divorce, it will be him. His wife seems very narcissistic.

I have noticed Erin leaves the kids with Lori a lot and someone mentioned Alyssa had them a few days last summer. Lori went on a series of rants recently against public schools and there was some speculation about Erin and Ryan possibly putting their kids into public school.

I also remember the interaction between Steven and Lori. It didn't seem too loving on his end. I also think he's quite happy to be far away from CA.

3 hours ago, jerkit said:

I get the sense Cassi is the one practicing the hardcore patriarchy that Lori espouses. The others may be complementarian in the way “normal” evangelicals are - in mostly name, but not so much in practice. 

I have gotten that vibe from Cassi. She's Lori Jr.