Joy and Austin: 248 Days Since the Wedding and Still Counting

[front hugs > duggs]

Can I ask a question as someone who hasn't been around pregnant people maybe my whole life:

Is it a compliment or too personal to tell someone that they are glowing? I love FJ because it has really opened my eyes to certain things I've never considered/thought about before. Especially things relating to pregnancy, as that will be one of the next major events to happen in my life, despite it not being a few years away.

[SapphireSlytherin]

28 minutes ago, front hugs > duggs said:

Can I ask a question as someone who hasn't been around pregnant people maybe my whole life:

Is it a compliment or too personal to tell someone that they are glowing? I love FJ because it has really opened my eyes to certain things I've never considered/thought about before. Especially things relating to pregnancy, as that will be one of the next major events to happen in my life, despite it not being a few years away.

Would you tell a non-pregnant person they were glowing? 

[tabitha2]

Depends on the context. If someone is really excited or proud  they could be glowing with happiness and it would be a nice observation  or person could have a child glowing with health And a parent would  naturally think it a compliment. 

[NotQuiteMotY]

17 hours ago, Bugaboo said:

I think she has dropped. I mean, we haven't seen that many pictures of her pregnant, but compared with my co-worker, who has the same due date as Joy, she has seriously dropped. My coworker just went on maternity leave today and she was still carrying super high. 

Yeah, it could be the angle of the camera, but I think she has dropped. Hard to tell, though. 

And as an aside: Not everyone drops at all. I'm pretty sure Little NQ never did!

[Melbelle]

Pregnant person here, so for me personally, I don't mind it at all when someone says I'm glowing.  And I would love it if someone said it to me when I wasn't pregnant too.  I believe that when people say that they are bestowing a compliment on you and therefore I take it as a kindness and let it make me happy.  

However, touching a pregnant woman's belly is UNACCEPTABLE without their permission or without them grabbing your hand and putting it on their belly.  I finally grabbed my MIL's hand and put it on my belly so she could feel her grandson move because I knew she would never touch me without my permission and I love her for being so respectful of me.  I work from home so I've been lucky to avoid the work scrutiny that can happen, but there is a family member that keeps doing it.  It's really frustrating because I'm not sure how to tell him to stop.  My BIL is in a bit of a love triangle at the moment and living with his new BF and his ex.  But he hasn't specifically told the family that his ex is, in fact, his ex.  It's all kinds of confusing and the ex is the person that keeps touching me, so I'm nervous that if I say something it could make their whole crazy scenario even more volatile.  My BIL can be particularly blunt and harsh and none of us think the ex is handling the situation well emotionally, so at this point I just avoid him and do my best to move away quickly when he starts patting my belly.  UGH!!!  

[front hugs > duggs]

20 minutes ago, SapphireSlytherin said:

Would you tell a non-pregnant person they were glowing? 

I likely wouldn't use the word glowing. But one of my friends recently got divorced and I told him he seemed more "jolly". I feel like that's a strange word, but he is a large Scottish man and just seemed so damn happy and less reserved than how I knew him when he was married.

I guess I can't picture calling a 6'5" burly Scottish man as glowing, though I suppose he was 

[Carm_88]

Can I please say no guessing in the normal threads! Please go to the baby name thread and make my life easier and not clutter up the thread for those who hate it! 

[JesSky03]

I think its okay to say a pregnant woman is glowing- but don't be surprised if she just kind of rolls her eyes at it. 

[kachuu]

1 hour ago, KelseyAnn said:

I learned the hard way not to ask a woman if she is pregnant. I was 13 and at Sams Club with my sister when I asked the cashier how far along she was, you know, because I was just SO sure. 

Turns out she had had her baby six months ago. Talk about embarassing. 

I used to work at a theme park (specifically, rides department) & as a precaution if we saw a woman we suspected to be pregnant, we were explicitly taught to ask "Are you expecting?" The logic being that it would "remind" her that she couldn't ride roller coasters () and to ask her to wait on the exit ramp for her party. But if it turns out she wasn't pregnant & she looks like "Excuse you bitch, expecting what?" then we respond with "Expecting to have fun today at such and such!"

Being currently pregnant & looking back at this, it's comical. Well, both comical and hateful. Comical that a woman could possibly forget that she's pregnant (especially when she's further along) and hateful because it's almost condescending that the mindset is you (complete and utter stranger) have to REMIND her she's pregnant.

 

You don't lose your intelligence when you are pregnant. 

(I've lost my shit plenty of times, but not my intelligence )

[Knight of Ni]

If someone was pregnant would you have been able to force her not to ride? I know there are posted warnings but are they forbidden from riding? I always thought that it was just an assumed risk that a pregnant woman might take but the park couldn’t legally forbid her from riding? 

[nst]

apparently i glow after a massage and I am not pregnant so do I win the prize 

HAPPY VALENTINES DAY 

[Brickiebaby]

Oh man, dropping when you already carry low can still be noticeable. My baby boy was implanted low and stayed right on my pelvis the whole pregnancy. But when he dropped it was a new level of low. My bladder was not impressed, and he came 2 days after the drop, luckily. Joy looks to be carrying not as high as before, but that could mean she's dropped or that the baby is growing more out than up! My guess is she most likely won't be going past her due date.

[VelociRapture]

2 hours ago, front hugs > duggs said:

Can I ask a question as someone who hasn't been around pregnant people maybe my whole life:

Is it a compliment or too personal to tell someone that they are glowing? I love FJ because it has really opened my eyes to certain things I've never considered/thought about before. Especially things relating to pregnancy, as that will be one of the next major events to happen in my life, despite it not being a few years away.

I don’t think there’s anything wrong with it, but some women may not appreciate it. Pregnancy can be really tough physically and emotionally, so while some women may love hearing that others may be less than thrilled because they feel bloated and sick. 

My go to rule is to basically treat pregnant women like you would treat anyone else. For instance, I normally don’t comment on how someone looks. When I do it’s for a special reason, like I’m complimenting a bride on her wedding day. So I personally try to avoid commenting on how a pregnant woman looks. I like to just talk with them about normal stuff or ask how they’re feeling instead - it’s a way of showing interest and concern without focusing on how she looks.

[kachuu]

42 minutes ago, Knight of Ni said:

If someone was pregnant would you have been able to force her not to ride? I know there are posted warnings but are they forbidden from riding? I always thought that it was just an assumed risk that a pregnant woman might take but the park couldn’t legally forbid her from riding? 

Usually the harness or safety features that are required to ride would not fit around the pregnant belly. So by the time they sit on the ride, it's more of a conversation that "I apologize but the safety restraints that are required to ride this ride are not latching, clicking, etc."

 

I'm assuming. We never had issues (or heard of issues) regarding a pregnant woman trying to ride a roller coaster or other theme park ride. But this also doesn't account for big slow train rides or we used to have one ride that would parachute you up really high while you sit in a porch swing type of contraption with a simple bar across your lap.

[nickelodeon]

25 minutes ago, VelociRapture said:

I don’t think there’s anything wrong with it, but some women may not appreciate it. Pregnancy can be really tough physically and emotionally, so while some women may love hearing that others may be less than thrilled because they feel bloated and sick. 

To add to that, if a woman who's feeling anxiety or fear or pain in her pregnancy gets told "you're glowing!", what she hears is "you SHOULD be glowing and not, well, anxious and fearful and in pain" and feel like shit for not performing pregnancy "correctly." There's nothing wrong with the comment in itself, but I feel like avoiding pregnancy-platitudes gives pregnant women more room to claim their own feelings and experiences.

[Rosalie]

2 hours ago, Knight of Ni said:

If someone was pregnant would you have been able to force her not to ride? I know there are posted warnings but are they forbidden from riding? I always thought that it was just an assumed risk that a pregnant woman might take but the park couldn’t legally forbid her from riding? 

Quote

The concern with roller coasters, thrill rides, and virtual rides during pregnancy is associated with the rapid starts and stops, the jarring forces, and the pressures against the body that occur during these types of rides. This rigorous activity creates additional jarring forces within the uterus that may lead to premature separation of the placenta from the wall of the uterus, which is called placental abruption.

The jarring force from even slow automobile accidents has caused placental abruption, miscarriage and other pregnancy complications for women who are pregnant even when the trauma is not directly to the uterus. Although the jarring force is usually less with amusement park rides, it still warrants precaution.

Although there are women who have been pregnant and ridden the various thrill rides without complication, it is a risk that should be avoided.  Amusement parks are good at identifying rides that pose risks to pregnant women . The safest course of action is to play it safe and avoid the rides that pose a risk; you can always return to the park and enjoy the rides after you deliver your baby.

Source:  http://americanpregnancy.org/pregnancy-health/amusement-parks/

[CorruptionInc.]

2 hours ago, VelociRapture said:

For instance, I normally don’t comment on how someone looks. When I do it’s for a special reason, like I’m complimenting a bride on her wedding day. 

I am the same. Looks can be a used as a cheap blow sometimes. 

[JordynDarby5]

If its family or friend I'll probably say something that they look great or something. I'm a little more nervous about saying anything if I don't know the pregnant woman well or at all. To make the assumption. What if their not pregnant? Well, then I just insulted her and was rude. But the other reason is what if she lost her baby? One of my friends had a miscarriage while she was on vacation. When she came back to work at the store one of the customers came in the day she came back all excited and ran up to hug her and touch her belly asking how the baby was. Now she had no way to know about the miscarriage, she was just a nice lady who always asked about the baby and my friend was always happy to tell her the latest update and felt awful after my friend told her. She apologized repeatedly and every time she came the store afterwards. My friend understood but it still hurt and was hard for her. Since then I won't say anything unless the woman says something. I don't want to insult anyone by congratulating them on pregnancy when their not or have to put woman in position to tell someone she's not close to or complete stranger she had miscarriage.     

[candygirl200413]

You guys have taught me so well to just let the pregnant person make comments instead of saying anything and I always think that if I'm ever in passive conversation with someone and they know the pregnant woman. So thank you  all

[KnittingOwl]

13 hours ago, karen77 said:

Yes!!!!!! ARe you going to be around all day? We have a small dinner party after for those of us who aren't going to the banquet. I have class all day, but obviously have a break for lunch.  just sayin'

Were you there last year?

Im going down for Saturday (assuming I’m not in labor or just gave birth) with a few friends. Not sure how late we are staying. 

I’ve never been to Madrona. I went to Stitches West the past 3 years because I was living in the Bay Area. Actually last year I was able to schedule a trip down to the office in San Francisco and stay a few extra days for SW. 

I am really looking forward to the Market. Didn’t schedule any classes this year just because of baby. 

[Kangaroo]

Valentine's Day post from Joy.

[VBOY9977]

Does anyone else remember them saying in the after show that they called each other “babe” because Austin didn’t like to be called honey?? I wonder what changed

[Daisy0322]

As far as the glowing comment, I didn't mind personally. I hated it when people said "look how big you are!" That is only a compliment if your like 7 and just had a growth spurt or something lol. I did have a basketball tummy that got many "your so cute" comments. I got tired of it, I was grumpy due to a high risk pregnancy and ante natle depression though. 

[allthegoodnamesrgone]

Joy looks good in purple, she also looks like a teenager (which she almost is). Austin look at all the trouble your VERY pregnant wife went to too look good for you, you could at least put on a Sunday going to fancy church outfit.

[HarleyQuinn]

Joy still has the face of a 12 year old, that picture just messes with me.