Lori Alexander 35: Closing Windows Because of the Fires

[Sarah92]

Does she even have permission from the author to pull that crap?

[EowynW]

52 minutes ago, Sarah92 said:

Does she even have permission from the author to pull that crap?

Hell no she doesn't. 

[delphinium65]

1 hour ago, Sarah92 said:

Does she even have permission from the author to pull that crap?

It seems that the author is aware.  

 

[Curious]

On 12/21/2017 at 3:47 PM, Sarah92 said:

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You're not being disrespectful at all and I think you ask a very important question.  I have to admit I probably haven't thought about this as much as I should have. This actually concerns me and I'm now encouraged to study into this more myself. 

Even as a Christian, I have to admit it seems kinda like magical thinking right? I can really only talk about my experience with and struggle with prayer. So please bear with me and know that I am no theologian or expert in Scripture. But then again theologians aren't always very good at speaking to the "crayon style" as you put it. I know I've almost thrown a couple of books because of their complicated writing. 

So anyways after that intro, on the "ask the spirit to guide you" part. This is Christianize and sounds slightly mystical and weird.  "The Holy Spirit is often referenced as the part of the Trinity ( a whole other subject ) that acts as a guide, is empowering, and helps us discern truth. So when a person references asking the Holy Spirit to guide them they are usually saying they need help with a decision, are feeling lost, or need help discerning the truth. 

Romans 8:26-Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words.

Acts 2:4- And they were all filled with the Holy Spirit and began to speak in other tongues as the Spirit gave them utterance.

Luke 4:1- And Jesus, full of the Holy Spirit, returned from the Jordan and was led by the Spirit in the wilderness. 

The being lead by God after prayer can be complicated in my opinion because God sometimes chooses to remain silent. First prayer is seen as an important part of developing a closer relationship with God. The thought is that if you do not communicate with a friend or loved one it can be hard to maintain a relationship. Prayer is seen as communication and Christians are encouraged just to pray in all things whether its just to tell God about their day, give thanks, praise God, ask for help, ask for guidance, etc. It's all part of a relationship with God. 

Prayer seems different to a lot of people. I know when I was attempting to choose my college, I was praying a lot. When I stepped foot on my campus I just felt utter peace and certainty that I was supposed to go there. I felt at home. Of course Lori would probably say this was the devil but oh well. 

Another example is kinda a weird story. I studied abroad for a semester and went to Germany for Thanksgiving with a group of friends. Many of us had to take different flights. As a result, I flew by myself. I came into my terminal and looked around for my friends and they were no where to be found. My cellphone wasn't working or something so I just couldn't call people to find them. So I'm wandering around an airport I'd never been to, in a foreign country, completely lost. I even went outside to check out the pick up lane. By now it's getting dark and I know that we're supposed to be catching a train soon. I'm scared and praying; I probably wasn't thinking clearly from fear and traveling exhaustion (I was probably being stupid, idk). Anyways, I come back inside and look over to see a staircase going down. I didn't even really read the sign, I just got a really strong feeling to go down the stairs and so I went. I rounded the corner and there was my friend group all worried about me. I came into a different terminal than expected and somehow wandered my way over to them. I feel like God gave me that push to go down the stairs.

This isn't my only instance and some would think its ridiculous but it's my experience. So sometimes I have felt strong direction.  If I don't feel a particular direction I just go with what seems to be the best decision in line with my beliefs. 

However the part I struggle with are the prayers that seem to go unanswered. I won't lie about that, at least not anymore, but it is really hard. I can paint a smile on my face but that doesn't mean the questions about God's faithfulness aren't still there in my head. In my opinion, sometimes the answer is silence and we can only do the best we can with what we've been given.

My life verse is Hebrews 11:1- Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see.

Prayer is heavily connected to having faith that God has an ultimate plan. 

So sorry for the length of this and I hope that I at least sorta answered the question. I honestly felt like there was so much that I could say because of the interconnectedness of it all. I was tempted to go into the Trinity and faith etc. but I shall refrain. If I didn't answer something let me know. And if anyone sees anything that they felt might be wrong feel free to let me know, I welcome different views and correction. 

Also sorry for any spelling and grammar mistakes I'm trying to type this out as fast as possible. 

 

 

 

 

@Sarah92  Thanks for taking the time to answer my question.

Not going to lie, the "ask the spirit to guide you" is perhaps too magical thinking for me to really get it.  When I was a kid, I don't remember prayer ever really being explained so maybe that is my problem.  I appreciate your explanation, though

The "being led by God" made more sense to me.  As an agnostic (or maybe atheist...I don't know exactly), I would call that intuition or a "gut feeling" and I have had that happen to me before.

Thanks again for taking the time to explain and share your experiences

[fundamentallyfearless]

Lori just LOVESSSSS to prove how right her life is and how right she is and how right her "biblical" interpretation is and how right she is now because she "learned" from her past mistakes and did you know she went VIRAL and she is just the queen of right ville in the state of right riding in on her right white horse...

[EowynW]

$11 an hour, especially with kids, would be a nightmare for me. It was hard when I was a kid growing up. I can't imagine doing it now. 

[fundamentallyfearless]

I just love tormenting Lori on instagram... She’ll always be jealous that other people have husbands who are AWESOME, and will always want other women to have sucky husbands who treat them like shit.

[Seahorse Wrangler]

19 minutes ago, fundamentallyfearless said:

she is just the queen of  vile

FIFY

[fundamentallyfearless]

@Seahorse Wrangler thank you!  Stinking autocorrect on FJ drives me nuts sometimes haha.

[Sarah92]

It sounds like a recipe for an awesome marriage to a guy that you can be yourself around and he can be himself. Husbands are to love their wives and treat her with respect.  Or are we not to have that expectations? Doesn't Lori say we should look for good, godly partners? Make. Up. Your. Mind. Woman. 

Humans are social beings. They thrive with connection. It's why man should not be alone. Women need people to support and actually care about their needs. They should be able to expect respect and kindness. Guys should be able to have love and kindness. 

[Frog99]

@EowynW $11/hour with no kids would be very difficult here and we live in a medium cost of living area.  We are in a college town and the price of rental properties is high- and that doesn’t include any utilities. 

I’m curious why that poster’s husband doesn’t pick up a second job though. I would imagine her husband works a 24-48 or 24-72 schedule (the latter is more common). DH now works occasional shifts as a FF/paramedic (makes substantially more than $11/hour)- but when he did it full time in a neighboring county, he took a second full-time shift during the summers for a resort town in another county. It meant he worked 24 on 24 off- and on then 24 off he worked on building the electrical business.  He did that for a few summers and then decided it was too much- we didn’t see him a whole lot from May to September. He ultimately resigned from the full time county job but still picks up shifts for both departments on occasion. 

Most FF/paramedics he works with either take shifts at a second fire company (or get overtime) or they have a business or other job. 

As the business has grown he hasn’t had the same availability- and I believe that’s our path, but he does love emergency medicine and serving others. I’m happy he gets to live out both of his dreams. 

Lori and her fangirls would freak over the fact that in the county job he had, some stations only staffed a medic and an EMT on each shift and some of his partners were females. They would also freak over the fact that the employees were assigned duties on shift- those duties weren’t delegated to women or a maid service. 

[Curious]

5 hours ago, fundamentallyfearless said:

I just love tormenting Lori on instagram... She’ll always be jealous that other people have husbands who are AWESOME, and will always want other women to have sucky husbands who treat them like shit.

Yeah, who would want a husband that treats you like a human being with feelings and an individual personality.  pfft  

I've been married 16 years and my husband does all the things (or similar) in that list (except the praying ones).  Somehow we've managed to have a happy marriage despite my apparent selfishness.  We very rarely fight/argue.  Unlike Ken, he doesn't let me linger in the hospital alone but stays with me all day, EVERY day and helps advocate for me, especially when I'm unable to do so myself.

I don't need to control him because he respects me and we make virtually all decisions together....like adults.

[Botkinetti]

The isolation at home that Lori advocates for is really disturbing to me. I spend more time at home now that I am retired but I spent 35 years working. I get together frequently with friends and catch up. If you never see other adults you don’t have to confront the idea that there are other choices in life that are equally valid to yours. Other people can be very happy with their lives.

The lives of her fans just seem dreadful to me. Endlessly worrying about the lack of money but determined to remain poor to convince themselves that they are holy and their choices are the only correct ones for all families everywhere. I assume they would feel sorry for me with my public schooled children and my non submissive marriage . I am grateful I never had to live in a tiny little bubble I had no way to get out of.

[formergothardite]

Checking in on Lori and Ken and I see they are still miserable vile people. They never change. 

[fundamentallyfearless]

38 minutes ago, formergothardite said:

Checking in on Lori and Ken and I see they are still miserable vile people. They never change. 

Sadly, you are correct...

[Pink Muffin]

Spoiler

Oh, how I despise this old hag!

A woman doesn´t need to place those things listed oupon a husband, he does the things on the list (or some of them, or other things)  because he loves his wife. And - suprise Lori!! - the wife does nice things to his husband because she loves him.

No, no this is all wrong! Here is how it´s done according to the Lord Lori:

After watching her parents bad, dysfunctional marriage she had no idea how a good marriage looks like. So she married a guy she didn´t love, not even like and with whom she fought under their courtship, honeymoon and 23 years of marriage. Under all these years she placed a buch of selfish expectation upon her husband, but he did not change. Instead Lori transformed so she can preach submission to the married women so they can be as miserable as she is.

So there, there you have the recipe to a happy marriage a la Lori Alexander

[lilwriter85]

11 hours ago, Frog99 said:

@EowynW $11/hour with no kids would be very difficult here and we live in a medium cost of living area.  We are in a college town and the price of rental properties is high- and that doesn’t include any utilities. 

I’m curious why that poster’s husband doesn’t pick up a second job though. I would imagine her husband works a 24-48 or 24-72 schedule (the latter is more common). DH now works occasional shifts as a FF/paramedic (makes substantially more than $11/hour)- but when he did it full time in a neighboring county, he took a second full-time shift during the summers for a resort town in another county. It meant he worked 24 on 24 off- and on then 24 off he worked on building the electrical business.  He did that for a few summers and then decided it was too much- we didn’t see him a whole lot from May to September. He ultimately resigned from the full time county job but still picks up shifts for both departments on occasion. 

Most FF/paramedics he works with either take shifts at a second fire company (or get overtime) or they have a business or other job. 

 

I also wondered the same thing about the firefighter husband not getting a second job or having a side business. A friend of mine is a firefighter and also has few side jobs which include teaching CPR and First Aid classes, a livestock business, and during hunting seasons he works as a guide. My cousin is married to a retired firefighter and he sometimes worked other jobs(cleaning offices, carpentry)  on his off days, but she worked too because they had kids and she always had the "what if he got severely injured or killed on the job" fear.

 

4 hours ago, Botkinetti said:

The lives of her fans just seem dreadful to me. Endlessly worrying about the lack of money but determined to remain poor to convince themselves that they are holy and their choices are the only correct ones for all families everywhere. I assume they would feel sorry for me with my public schooled children and my non submissive marriage . I am grateful I never had to live in a tiny little bubble I had no way to get out of.

I sometimes go back and forth about feeling bad for Loris' fangirls. Many of them appear to be married to men who don't make that much and some of them have large families that aren't living comfortably on one income. They sometimes say they are happy being home for their kids, but the constant money worries are probably always there. Whenever they bring up money struggles Lori either ignores them or gives them shitty advice.

With the woman with the firefighter husband, Lori tells her about Tightwad Gazette which might not help all that much these days due to inflation and other finance issues. I feel bad for that woman who thinks that Lori can somehow relate to raising a family on $11 an hour.

 

These comments from Lori and a fangirl pissed me off due to the generalizations. 

 

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Debby in Kansas says:

December 22, 2017 at 4:02 pm

I think my mom could’ve written that . It echoed so much of what she told me after I was grown up. She was so happy at home. However, my dad had friends with working wives & with it came bigger homes, boats, 2nd cars, etc. and he wanted all the toys, too. So, she went to work full time and I don’t think she was ever happy again. Based on what became of our family, I’d say that the people standing to gain the most by the whole dual income are divorce lawyers, social workers, child psychologists, adult psychiatrists, drug counselors, drug dealers, liquor stores, etc. I guarantee you it wasn’t us kids.

 

 

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Lori Alexander says:

December 22, 2017 at 4:14 pm

You are so sadly right, Debby, yet many women don’t seem to care too much about the children.

 

Not all dual income homes have toys like boats, bigger houses, etc. Some dual income families live in modest homes and many times there are valid reasons for having two cars. If Debby's father wanted be like the Joneses that's on him and not on his friends. If Debby's mother was unhappy working because the dad wanted all those toys, her issue again should be with the dad and not anybody else. Debby may have caught onto the resentment and unhappiness of her mother and seems to assume that many other two incomes have major issues. Debby's dad friends and their families might have been very happy and they just also happened to want boats and other things. 

Lori, the fucking bitch that she is, will never realize that many women work because they care about their kids having food, decent clothes, health insurance, and other resources. Lori will never get that some men don't make enough to provide all those things for families on their own. Some workplaces/companies offer shitty insurance packages and if a man is self-employed, it can be difficult to obtain affordable healthcare insurance. Lori is an out of touch moron and many of her fangirls aren't that bright either.

[delphinium65]

2 hours ago, lilwriter85 said:

Lori, the fucking bitch that she is, will never realize that many women work because they care about their kids having food, decent clothes, health insurance, and other resources. Lori will never get that some men don't make enough to provide all those things for families on their own. Some workplaces/companies offer shitty insurance packages and if a man is self-employed, it can be difficult to obtain affordable healthcare insurance. Lori is an out of touch moron and many of her fangirls aren't that bright either.

 

How are you supposed to be a keeper at home when your husband can't/won't earn enough to cover even cheap rent, and you end up homeless?  Lori doesn't know, and couldn't care less.  

[lilwriter85]

I was looking through the comments on Facebook. One of Lori's kiss ass fangirls Melissa says she works from home 24 hours a week as a consultant. She doesn't give any additional details on that, but I'm guessing it's really some kind of MLM thing. She probably took the kids out of activities for money reasons. Melissa recently did a post about how she had not purchased her favorite perfume in several years and was planning to save up money for it and then her husband sold sports jerseys to buy it for her. She might be happy to a certain extent, but I hope she and her husband have a backup plan in case something happens to him.
 

Quote

 

Melissa  Oh yes. I used to work 50-60 hours a week, my husband also. For a house that sat vacant most of each day. To rush home and have it turn into total hysteria and chaos for four-five hours of homework, dinner (usually out of a can or box or picked up from a fast food place), activities, yelling, frustration, and everyone collapsing into bed frazzled and upset.
Then I came home. I work for myself twenty hours throughout the week as a consultant. All of my other time is spent edifying our home. Cooking, cleaning, homeschooling. We withdrew from every activity but karate. Our evenings are spent watching the kids play Connect Four or board games or all reading. We sold three televisions in the house, as well. We have one small tv we'll bring out to the den if we want to watch a movie together as a family. Our income has gone down but so have our financial expenses....big time. We use our yard to have a small flock of chickens and gardens. Last year we grew herbs and vegetables and the kids sold the extra eggs we couldn't eat to neighbors and kept the proceeds for spending money. Some people think our lifestyle is extreme or radical....LOL....I think theirs is because I've been there and it's constant chaos. I love the peace and harmony.

 

Quote

 

Kelsey - We have been looking for an affordable house for our family for a while. It's so hard cause I will not settle until the mortgage is low enough to afford on one income. We rent right now while looking but I would rather be able to rent and stay home and raise and educate my own kids then be away at work all day to have a huge house to come home to have to clean and leave my family for half the day

 

This Kelsey might need to accept that her family might not find a mortgage that is low enough for one income. Her FB is very locked down and doesn't list where she lives. I'm guessing they might be in a high COL area and her husband can't qualify for available mortgages on his income. They appear to be a bit a young. There is nothing wrong with being a renter, but I can get why some people want to own homes and not always deal with landlords.

9 minutes ago, delphinium65 said:

How are you supposed to be a keeper at home when your husband can't/won't earn enough to cover even cheap rent, and you end up homeless?  Lori doesn't know, and couldn't care less.  

Oh, I agree that Lori doesn't care. The thing that I really find sad is that her fangirls who have money struggles can't see that Lori doesn't have a clue about their struggles and doesn't care at all about them.

[Botkinetti]

I also don’t understand Lori and her fans endlessly bleating about the unending chaos that is supposedly the life of a family when the mother works. Of course it wasn’t all sunshine and roses but for the most part our lives were fairly calm. We weren’t stumbling around wondering how to open up a can of something to eat for dinner.  Virtually all my friends worked when they had children and their lives were much like mine. 

My children never had a non working mother. It was their normal. They are now grown and are stable and happy. If I had it to do all over again I would still work because it was a valid choice for me and my family.  I don’t tell other people that my choice must be theirs and don’t understand the compulsion to do so.

[Frog99]

39 minutes ago, Botkinetti said:

I also don’t understand Lori and her fans endlessly bleating about the unending chaos that is supposedly the life of a family when the mother works. Of course it wasn’t all sunshine and roses but for the most part our lives were fairly calm. We weren’t stumbling around wondering how to open up a can of something to eat for dinner.  Virtually all my friends worked when they had children and their lives were much like mine. 

My children never had a non working mother. It was their normal. They are now grown and are stable and happy. If I had it to do all over again I would still work because it was a valid choice for me and my family.  I don’t tell other people that my choice must be theirs and don’t understand the compulsion to do so.

Our life is busy at times- but I have stay at home parent friends that say the same (one family homeschools). I wouldn’t trade it for the isolation Lori and her fans promote. 

My mom worked and I appreciate that she did. We didn’t eat out of cans or boxes and life wasn’t stressful or chaotic. 

[lilwriter85]

1 hour ago, Frog99 said:

Our life is busy at times- but I have stay at home parent friends that say the same (one family homeschools). I wouldn’t trade it for the isolation Lori and her fans promote. 

My mom worked and I appreciate that she did. We didn’t eat out of cans or boxes and life wasn’t stressful or chaotic. 

I have known a few homeschooling families that are/were busy at times. My neighbors growing up were a fundie lite couple that homeschooled. The wife had a bookkeeping business that she mostly did from home. Their sons were involved in youth soccer, a homeschooling co-op, piano lessons, church activities, and a few other things. Another homeschooling were liberal Buddhists and their kids were involved in activities and the mother volunteered at non-profits and has a big circle of friends. I met that family when I did a cat and kitten fostering for an animal shelter. They used animal care as part of their homeschooling lessons.

A guy that I know has a stepdaughter whose family is involved with ATI. They are somewhat isolated. The stepdaughter picks which church activities her kids are involved in.  He told me that the church youth group went on a trip to an amusement park that has a water park within it. Her kids couldn't go due to modesty issues. There are  money issues in that family so her kids aren't any other activities. He mentioned how his step-granddaughter wanted a join a local ice skating club, but couldn't because the parents didn't have the money for fees and additional hourly lesson fees.

I have noticed some of Lori's fangirls mentioning how their kids aren't in activities. I suspect is due to money and some of the fangirls being very conservative and legalistic.

[TeddyBonkers]

That Instagram post! Yeah, you silly women, don't concern yourselves with how a man treats you- if he has a penis and a J.O.B. that's all that's required for "God's best". As long as YOU treat him like he's God on earth, your marriage will flourish. 

Sometimes I feel sad that Lori has never loved Ken, but then I remember he's a smug asshole who married Lori because he thought she'd be a good mom. Those two deserve each other.

[Gemini]

1 hour ago, TeddyBonkers said:

Sometimes I feel sad that Lori has never loved Ken, but then I remember he's a smug asshole who married Lori because he thought she'd be a good mom. Those two deserve each other.

Wrong on all accounts then....

[Frog99]

6 hours ago, lilwriter85 said:

I have noticed some of Lori's fangirls mentioning how their kids aren't in activities. I suspect is due to money and some of the fangirls being very conservative and legalistic.

I agree that it’s probably both. It makes me think back to the women who posted on the homeschool article- about how public school children have created nothing but problems and they don’t want to build relationships with those kids. One of the mothers appears to have younger kids so I’m unclear as to the level of corruption that could actually occur. And Melissa from the empty house post who said they watch their kids play connect 4 in the evenings- I love my kids and I love watching them do things- but that’s not appealing. 

Tonight I had dinner with seven incredibly intelligent and talented women- women who hold high positions within their fields. The age range was 38-65. The women at the higher end of that bracket worked- they weren’t keepers at home- and interestingly enough, their mothers worked. They all seem to appreciate that fact- certainly there’s no maladjustment or feelings of abandonment.