Aunt Lori Alexander 22: Criticising your poop and pining for Gilead

[delphinium65]

59 minutes ago, AlwaysDiscerning said:

She did say in one comment that she expects the trolls to quiet down in a week. I am thinking once she is back from vacation she will delete all the vulgar comments and then do a post about them.  it's a bit suspicious that she just seems to know that things will quiet down in a week so I think it is all part of a big plan to keep them up for a while to show her fan club that she is right. And she continues to delete the comments that we are up in arms about to prove us wrong.

I wonder if some of the trolls may be part of a deliberate setup by Lori? I'd like to think that she wouldn't really do that...but I'm not 100% certain that she deserves the benefit of the doubt. 

[Koala]

2 minutes ago, delphinium65 said:

I'd like to think that she wouldn't really do that...but I'm not 100% certain that she deserves the benefit of the doubt. 

Well, once you've sabotaged your birth control to trick someone into having a baby with you so you can quit your job, you don't get a lot of points for integrity.  

[quiversR4hunting]

1 hour ago, AlwaysDiscerning said:

She did say in one comment that she expects the trolls to quiet down in a week. <snipped >

Here you go

Btw, I have no idea what was deleted 

[AlwaysDiscerning]

@quiversR4hunting

Reading that again it really is odd. How does she know it will cool down in a week? Just enough time for a vacation to be over.

[delphinium65]

47 minutes ago, Koala said:

Well, once you've sabotaged your birth control to trick someone into having a baby with you so you can quit your job, you don't get a lot of points for integrity.  

True.  Sad, but true. 

[AlwaysDiscerning]

Brian H. says:

June 28, 2017 at 11:14 am

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It is easier for a woman to juggle all the busyness of a full time homeschool mom (which is a never ending job that you never can clock out of for rest and recovery) if she also has time to do some things that she is passionate about doing or learning. We have one out of 5 left before graduating and we learned a long time ago that my wife was happier and felt more productive if she also had some time to “clock out” like I do on my job. And I gave it to her, since she doesn’t need to be working 24/7 while I sit on the couch in the evenings and forget about my job. In our case, my wife learned several new hobbies, took further learning online for something she was passionate about and eventually turned into a part time job, had an evening to herself every week, and a free morning to serve at the local food pantry, and took a part time job on our payroll managing the books for our company, since she loves numbers so much. She flourished so much as both a person, wife and mother after that and we have kept to it ever since. Friday nights were also firm date nights, even if we just stayed home for them. The youngest graduates next year. My wife is taking many of the skills she learned over the years and is increasing her photography business, in addition to offering pro bono services to low income families. We all do better when we put our god given talents to use, and stay at home wives and moms are no exception. My youngest sister has been an author, blogger and stay at home mom for 20 years. Her husband honors her gifts by making sure she has time each weak to devote to her craft and joy.

I would encourage young moms to pick up a hobby or two even during the hectic years of changing endless diapers and pouring over homeschool books. It does us all good to have something we love to do and are good at for some mental stimulation and rest and relaxation. And it doesn’t have to pay. Do it for yourself because it brings joy.

 

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Lori Alexander says:

June 28, 2017 at 11:45 am

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Yes, if mothers have time after taking good care of their husbands, children, and homes, then it’s fine for them to pursue something they enjoy as long as it doesn’t take them from the God-ordained ministry to their family. Once the children are older, as yours are, it becomes a lot easier.

Its odd Lori keeps saying things out of character to agree with him.

Lauren says:

June 28, 2017 at 11:04 am

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The facebook comment just didn’t make sense.

“I tell you what! God willing, I’d rather work for a earning, till I no longer can work; be independent, than be a stay at home mother, being house cleaner, window cleaner, curtain cleaner, taxi driver all afternoon, and the list can grow and grow.”

Even if you leave the house 8-10 hours a day and put the kids in daycare, the house still needs to be cleaned, the windows still need to be washed, the curtains still need to be cleaned, and errands still have to run. The difference is, now you get to do all of those things IN ADDITION to being a full-time worker outside the home! You don’t get to relax at night and enjoy your husband and children. You’re taking care of all the household duties that didn’t get done during the day while you were working.

 

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Lori Alexander says:

June 28, 2017 at 11:43 am

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No, it wasn’t a wise comment, Lauren, and for some reason, they fail to realize this and simply makes their lives more difficult unless they hire all of that work out which means they have to work harder to make more money to pay these people.

Right, not wise so it got deleted. BTW, who cleans their curtains. I don't even have any, just blinds. Doesn't seem like a thing to clean daily or weekly but maybe a spring cleaning once a year type of job. 

Also I was following up on that post where Laura commented. It said 2 comments but when I clicked on it, it disappeared. 5 mins before that I capture the last shots.

[L1o2u3]

Sooo... review posted  Although it's a short one. Don't want to waste more words than necessary

[littlemommy]

Please tell me it was something like this:

[Koala]

Spoiler

Since her "There's a campaign against my book!" rant, there have been:

12- 1 star reviews

2- 4 star reviews (and one of those was pretty vulgar and most definitely NOT a positive review) 

2- 5 star reviews

Again, I have not left a review, but it seems the fit she had didn't help her book at all.  She only managed to stir 3 people into leaving positive reviews, while 13 left negative reviews.  

I don't know what her goal was.  Most likely, she wanted readers to go give her 5 stars whether they'd read her book or not.  Either way, I am pretty sure this isn't the outcome she'd imagined.

 

[EowynW]

Stuff Christian culture likes just posted her article about Lysa's divorce. That should bring in some more dissenting voices against Aunt Lori. She better get that bony finger ready. 

[quiversR4hunting]

36 minutes ago, L1o2u3 said:

Sooo... review posted  Although it's a short one. Don't want to waste more words than necessary

Just read the latest review, love it. I have a review on there too. Mine is a verified purchase, yes I bought the horrible book. My review has many deleted responses. I believe the person that deleted the responses is the one that Lori tried to contact IRL.

[Curious]

I've (or others) have probably already said this somewhere on FJ, but every time I read this thread this stuff goes through my head and I have to get it out of there.

For individuals that are supposed to be leaders, "command men," headships, etc the way Lori (and others we follow) portray men like they need the care and attention of a toddler to function every day.  It's very demeaning IMO.

Men can't cook for themselves, control their urges, do laundry, clean up after themselves and on and on.

If I wasn't disabled and I treated my husband like a toddler, I'm pretty sure he would not be too happy about it (I also don't treat him that way while disabled...weird sentence).

He does pretty much everything here AND works full time and has a 90 minute commute each way from work.  As a result, I try to put minimal extra tasks on him unless it's something that *really* needs to be done.

We've been together 20 years (married 17) and he ended up getting way more to deal with than we originally thought. When I moved out here, I was only 6 weeks post op and drs were still talking about how I'd be 100% in a few months after I healed.   We planned that I would go to work as soon as I was healed up and could handle an office setting.  Obviously, that never happened, but he has never said ONE WORD about it.  He just does what needs to be done and it hasn't damaged him or caused him to be emasculated or any of the horrible things these fundie women suggest will happen to their precious special snowflake command man.

I've also never seen him ogle women when we are out and I'm sure Ken would faint dead away if he knew how long it's been since there was sex in this house.  Amazingly, he has not died or anything as a result of not getting 10 minutes/lube a day.  Is our house spotless?  No.  Does it really matter?  No.

6 minutes ago, quiversR4hunting said:

Just read the latest review, love it. I have a review on there too. Mine is a verified purchase, yes I bought the horrible book. My review has many deleted responses. I believe the person that deleted the responses is the one that Lori tried to contact IRL.

I am debating buying her book so I can leave a review.  I would not leave one for something I didn't actually own (though I have left reviews for things I've bought elsewhere if they have been really good or really bad.  I don't think that's against the rules, though)

I just don't know if I want to give her money.  She can't delete the reviews right?  Only we or amazon can delete them?

[SuperNova]

@Curious May I ask how you are disabled? If you don't want to answer, I understand:) 

Ten years ago I was struck head on while driving to work. I walked away from it but life has never been the same. My neck, back, and shoulder were pretty damaged and I ended up with multiple chronic health issues that can leave me bed bound for weeks on end. I feel the same way you do, my husband ended up with way more than we originally thought. I always thought that I would go back to work but we both see now that it's impossible. He has never complained about having to to the lions share of the work, it simply became the new norm. It gives me comfort to hear your story, that there's another couple with the same situation. I'm glad you have such a great guy. 

[louisa05]

1 hour ago, Curious said:

I've also never seen him ogle women when we are out

We were sitting on a bench eating ice cream at an outdoor mall last Saturday afternoon and a young woman walked by wearing those little lace shorts that don't cover the butt cheeks and with a lot of boob showing as well. Thinking of how appalled Lori would be at Ken witnessing this girl walking by, I glanced over at Mr. 05. He was totally immersed in his waffle cone. So when she was far enough away to not hear, I asked if he saw her. He said, "what, who?".  I explained that according to Lori, he should have been so distracted by this girl that he could not finish the ice cream or continue to function. He said, "okay, whatever", then suggested that Lori and Ken are batshit crazy and Ken must also be a dirty old perv. 

So there you go. 

[Chocolatedefrauded]

Curious, real marriage rules! Not the "follow the stupid rules" kind of marriage that fundies believe in but real marriage. Nothing beats a real marriage.

[AlwaysDiscerning]

 

Spoiler

 

 

 

Spoiler

 

 

[EowynW]

I want to see the comments on that comment. 

[Curious]

4 hours ago, SuperNova said:

@Curious May I ask how you are disabled?

I was dumb, is the short answer   I had back problems starting around 8th grade.  The dr. I went to blamed it on a variety of things...basically telling me it was in my head. Once I moved out and could choose my own dr, I found out that I had some bulging/herniated disks in my lumbar spine.  In 1997 (29 years old), I started having a lot more pain and losing feeling in my left leg.  I was supposed to move out here (we met in a Buffy the Vampire Slayer chatroom) and thought if I can just hold out until I get to the east coast I can find a better dr.  A week before I was supposed to move, I ended up going to the ER because I had lost feeling in my left leg.

They did surgery the next day, but I didn't have insurance at the time so got just enough care to not kill me, but not enough to actually do me any good.  The Dr. wanted to release me the day after surgery, but the PT wouldn't let him because I hadn't even been out of bed and I had 100% foot drop on my left side (basically my foot was paralyzed).  He gave her 1 more day to get me ready to go home, so I went home with an AFO for the right foot on my left foot and a cane that was too tall, making my shoulder into a brand new issue.   I got essentially no aftercare, even after I fell when I was home alone, the surgeon didn't even want to see me.  He just called in a steroid pack to the pharmacy in case I had any swelling.

So I basically just had a poor recovery from my "successful" surgery.  I had a second surgery in the thoracic area in 2005 and in Oct of 2014, I had a fusion from T4-T11.  I was admitted to a skilled nursing facility for rehab and due to mishandling by aides there, T12 suffered a compression fracture.  In March 2015, I had a cage put in at T12 and my fusion continued from T12-S1, plus they put in illiac screws to stabilize the fusion.

That is pretty much the condensed version.  The last couple years have been chaotic and I've spent much of the time either in hospitals or skilled nursing facilities.   2017 is the year of no surgery/hospitalization/SNF *touch wood*

Edit to add.  My husband took off work from Sept 13, 2005-Jan 2, 2006 and was with me every. single. day at both the hospital and rehab center I was sent to and he stayed home with me until I was cleared to be safe at home alone.

He also took off  the majority of the time during the 2014 and 2015 surgeries and rehab periods.   At one point, I was sent home for 6 weeks (between surgeries) and he did work some during that time.   He also took off the entire 8 weeks, I was in the skilled nursing facility last July after my flap surgery.  Much of that period was unpaid because he'd used up all his vacation/sick leave with the prior 2 surgeries.   He did get some donated time from co-workers/friends and he was able to work from "home" a few days, but we both decided that based on my past experiences, it was better for him to be with me and take a hit to pay rather than leave me alone in a facility (I also had some problems sleeping when he wasn't there thanks to my post death PTSD).

[quiversR4hunting]

5 hours ago, Curious said:

<snipped>

I am debating buying her book so I can leave a review.  I would not leave one for something I didn't actually own (though I have left reviews for things I've bought elsewhere if they have been really good or really bad.  I don't think that's against the rules, though)

I just don't know if I want to give her money.  She can't delete the reviews right?  Only we or amazon can delete them?

I stiil have the book, haven't put in the bon fire yet. I'll send it to anyone that wants to read it and review it. 

Lori can't delete the reviews only the reviewer or Amazon. The person that commented on my review removed her reviews due to fear of Lori doxxing and bullying her. (IIRC the commenter was female)

[Curious]

8 minutes ago, quiversR4hunting said:

I stiil have the book, haven't put in the bon fire yet. I'll send it to anyone that wants to read it and review it. 

Lori can't delete the reviews only the reviewer or Amazon. The person that commented on my review removed her reviews due to fear of Lori doxxing and bullying her. (IIRC the commenter was female)

That's a good idea.  We could send it around to various members that want to read it and it's not putting any money in Lori's pocket.  Nothing wrong with loaning books out to others.

How do we know that Lori was trying to out a reviewer?  That all happened while I was away and missed a few Lori threads.  I haven't had the will to go back and read the ones I missed.  The new stuff is bad enough.

[SuperNova]

@Curious My heart goes out to you. I can't begin to imagine the strength that it would take not to give up. I know from experience that the fear can be overwhelming at times. You are an amazing woman to not only survive, but keep positive. You have had ample opportunity to be angry and who would blame you?  But all I hear is courage. 

You and your husband are a testament to the real face of love. I wish you were here in California, I would love to sit down and have a cup of coffee with you, cut you a big slice of cake, and have along chat. You are someone I want to learn about life from! 

[quiversR4hunting]

9 minutes ago, Curious said:

<snipped>

How do we know that Lori was trying to out a reviewer?  That all happened while I was away and missed a few Lori threads.  I haven't had the will to go back and read the ones I missed.  The new stuff is bad enough.

The reviewer contacted me on Amazon. I think it was through Amazon. I'll have to look at my Amazon account to see if messages can be made to others or maybe she did it here. I locked down my amazon account and removed all identifiers, even asked an admin here to see if they could figure out who I was by my amazon account. They failed  I kept my review up. I remember the commenter on amazon telling me to watch myself and that she was deleting her comments because she didn't need the stress.

IIRC, About the same time a couple newbies came here and gave similar stories. 

[MarblesMom]

On 6/27/2017 at 8:48 PM, Free Jana Duggar said:

Apx. 200 more followers more in the past hour. What is going on? Can you pay for followers or is she getting them by paying for boosts?

I admin the FB page for a small village library, and every time I post, FB is "offering me" $30 to boost my post for an imaginary 30k people (village is 600 maybe, and there are no 30k people within 50 miles).  So, perhaps she pays to boost her posts.....? Or she got a coupon?

[L1o2u3]

I already made my amazon.com account as anonymous as possible. I've never heard of authors trying to out reviewers... That is creepy. I am glad people only see my initials when visiting my profile. 

[Curious]

4 hours ago, SuperNova said:

@Curious My heart goes out to you. I can't begin to imagine the strength that it would take not to give up. I know from experience that the fear can be overwhelming at times. You are an amazing woman to not only survive, but keep positive. You have had ample opportunity to be angry and who would blame you?  But all I hear is courage. 

You and your husband are a testament to the real face of love. I wish you were here in California, I would love to sit down and have a cup of coffee with you, cut you a big slice of cake, and have along chat. You are someone I want to learn about life from! 

aww Thank you!  I did go through a period of pretty deep depression when we discovered that I was basically not going to get any better at 30.  I had graduated about 2 years prior with a degree in a field I loved and I loved my prior jobs in the field. I didn't know anyone here except my now husband and I'd moved 2500 miles away from everything I'd ever known.  The only thing that kept me sane was the internet.  I could still talk to friends I had made all over the world and people back home.  The first 18 months were pretty rough.  Then I decided I could be miserable for the rest of my life or I could play the hand I was dealt, so I taught myself how to do HTML and made a personal webpage.  Eventually, I taught myself how to make graphics like matching websets.  I took some classes online on stuff that I wanted to learn or found interesting and here we are

My husband is AMAZING.  We both took a leap of faith, having met on the internet before it was really a thing, we didn't meet in person until he came out to move me out here.  Things could have turned out much differently when we found out that I would be permanently disabled, but he just took it in stride and did what had to be done. 

I can't imagine what being married to Ken would be like with chronic problems.  Then again, I don't fuck around with my husband. If I want a potato, I just say I want a potato.  No weird passive-aggressive games here.

5 hours ago, quiversR4hunting said:

The reviewer contacted me on Amazon.

Holy cow!  I think I will go look through those old threads after all.  I wonder what she was planning to do?  Call the person and yell at her?  Post her information online so her fanclub could attack her?  For someone that was so upset about us knowing their information when Lori posts it online for everyone to see that is certainly an interesting response to a negative review.

You'd think Lori would have guessed there would be negative reviews based on the fact that she gets a lot of criticism on her blog.