Seewalds 14- Baby can I hold you tonight?

[karen77]

18 minutes ago, MyMilkshake said:

I was one who thought Guinn would be a warmer, more reality based mom type to Jessa and a more involved, more normal Grandma for Spurgeon and all the other grandkids they're going to end up with. I was so wrong! What a self righteous bitch! 
I'd never want anyone like her for a sister.

Well, she may be more involved as a mom (that's a low bar to hit compared to Michelle) but being that isn't mutually exclusive with being a self righteous bitch!

[MyMilkshake]

1 minute ago, karen77 said:

Well, she may be more involved as a mom (that's a low bar to hit compared to Michelle) but being that isn't mutually exclusive with being a self righteous bitch!

Well there goes my hope of anyone halfway normal having a positive influence on Ben and Jessa's kids. 
I'm holding onto a tiny shred of hope for Jinger's future kids for now.

[Carm_88]

21 minutes ago, MyMilkshake said:

Well there goes my hope of anyone halfway normal having a positive influence on Ben and Jessa's kids. 
I'm holding onto a tiny shred of hope for Jinger's future kids for now.

Yeah I kinda gave up after Michael Seewald has that massive freakout over people being mean to Jessa because of the holocaust comment. Hopefully, Jessa and Ben can be better parents than their parents. It wouldn't take much! 

[Fundie Bunny]

3 hours ago, MyMilkshake said:

I was one who thought Guinn would be a warmer, more reality based mom type to Jessa and a more involved, more normal Grandma for Spurgeon and all the other grandkids they're going to end up with. I was so wrong! What a self righteous bitch! 
I'd never want anyone like her for a sister.

After all she did raise Jessica. You don'te become a little shit over night

[RosyDaisy]

The Seewalds are VF, that explains it all.

[Gillyweed]

Jessa and Ben kind of remind me of Jon and Kate Gosselin. I've recently been rewatching Jon and Kate plus 8, and I've been getting similar vibes from them (Jon and Kate from around season 2 and 3, not when it was obvious their marriage was over)

[Carm_88]

22 hours ago, Gillyweed said:

Jessa and Ben kind of remind me of Jon and Kate Gosselin. I've recently been rewatching Jon and Kate plus 8, and I've been getting similar vibes from them (Jon and Kate from around season 2 and 3, not when it was obvious their marriage was over)

Except Jon and Kate could divorce, Jessa and Ben...I'm not sure. It would be a shock and I'm not sure if JB would allow it. 

[Stormy]

Well, as of tomorrow, Jessa's a week away from having her baby. It's occurred to me that the season will chug on for a good while after the birth, which will make further footage of the speculation and clumsy preparation extra awkward.

[eveandadam]

I can't decide what I wish for Jessa in this situation. On one hand I wish her an easy birth with a not so huge baby like last time which means that the second baby should be born before it's due date. On the other hand this means the babies would be less than 15 months apart which might cause Jessa to be pregnant again even earlier. I don't know which is better?

[SorenaJ]

Austin Forsyth: "Baby Seewald is definitely either a boy or a girl". You ignorant little shit. 

Also the talk of gender pisses me off. Come on, Duggars. At least they didn't have a gender reveal party, I guess. 

[VelociRapture]

On 1/23/2017 at 10:03 AM, Jinder Roles said:

Friendly Reminder: While we're all wearing our pussy hats and pussy grabs back shirts, let's remember to center trans-women (because not every woman has a vagina) who are one of the most marginalized groups in the country (especially POC trans women) and face an extremely high level of abuse and physical violence. 

I know this is old - but thank you for this! I think it's fine for women to carry signs proclaiming pride in their anatomy at these marches because Trump did, basically, boil the worth of women down to that same anatomy. But it's very important to remember that not all women have vaginas or breasts and they have just as much reason to march and be pissed off as anyone else.

5 hours ago, SorenaJ said:

Austin Forsyth: "Baby Seewald is definitely either a boy or a girl". You ignorant little shit. 

Also the talk of gender pisses me off. Come on, Duggars. At least they didn't have a gender reveal party, I guess. 

I didn't view his comment as being completely wrong to be honest. When a child is first born all the parents have to go on is the basic anatomical parts. So, the baby does stand a good chance of being born either a boy or girl (though that doesn't always happen, not everyone is born with a clear cut sex, and saying "male" or "female" may be more accurate.) It isn't until the child is old enough to indicate otherwise that they'd know whether their gender matches their sex.

For instance, I have an almost two month old daughter at home. We gave her a "feminine" name and use female pronouns for her because that's all we have to work with at the moment. If she ever tells us otherwise then her father and I would, of course, honor her wishes and refer to her however she wants. But until that happens (if it does) we have nothing to go on other than the parts she was born with.

That said, I have no doubt at all that Austin "Who the fuck are you" Forsyth and the Duggars don't believe, understand, or care about the difference between sex and gender or the many genders that exist. Nor would they be supportive of a child born without a defined sex or who is born transgender. So, I agree with you - he's an ignorant little shit. 

[Buzzard]

11 hours ago, Stormy said:

Well, as of tomorrow, Jessa's a week away from having her baby. It's occurred to me that the season will chug on for a good while after the birth, which will make further footage of the speculation and clumsy preparation extra awkward.

I was just wondering when baby watch would begin.  My guess is that she lied about her due date to increase attention.  She's probably due later than she said, just to encourage people to talk about it... 

[fluffernutter]

7 hours ago, SorenaJ said:

Austin Forsyth: "Baby Seewald is definitely either a boy or a girl". You ignorant little shit. 

Also the talk of gender pisses me off. Come on, Duggars. At least they didn't have a gender reveal party, I guess. 

Yes this! And when we know damn well they are popping out litters over the course of their lifetimes, who the hell cares what sex it is? If it's a girl, I'm sad because another girl is being born into that shit-show of a cult, and if it's a boy, I cringe because it's most likely another tiny Jim-boob in the making. 

[Carm_88]

8 hours ago, SorenaJ said:

Austin Forsyth: "Baby Seewald is definitely either a boy or a girl". You ignorant little shit. 

Also the talk of gender pisses me off. Come on, Duggars. At least they didn't have a gender reveal party, I guess. 

Ugh. Really? As if there was anything else for you people. Baby Seewald will be a cult member and a prop for the show. Just as Spurgeon is, ust as Jessa was. 

[Gillyweed]

1 hour ago, Buzzard said:

I was just wondering when baby watch would begin.  My guess is that she lied about her due date to increase attention.  She's probably due later than she said, just to encourage people to talk about it... 

Her size comparisons between pregnancy seem pretty much the same, though. I think her due date is real based on that. 

[Carm_88]

His little satisfied face at the end! Awwww! 

[Bad Wolf]

That is one gorgeous kid and Jessa seems to really enjoy him. Let's hope it continues.

[SassyPants]

2 hours ago, Carm_88 said:

His little satisfied face at the end! Awwww! 

He looks a lot like Ben in that photo.

[RosyDaisy]

That is one gorgeous kid and Jessa seems to really enjoy him. Let's hope it continues.

It won't when she pops out more puppies.

[LawsonBatesEgo]

11 hours ago, VelociRapture said:

I know this is old - but thank you for this! I think it's fine for women to carry signs proclaiming pride in their anatomy at these marches because Trump did, basically, boil the worth of women down to that same anatomy. But it's very important to remember that not all women have vaginas or breasts and they have just as much reason to march and be pissed off as anyone else.

I didn't view his comment as being completely wrong to be honest. When a child is first born all the parents have to go on is the basic anatomical parts. So, the baby does stand a good chance of being born either a boy or girl (though that doesn't always happen, not everyone is born with a clear cut sex, and saying "male" or "female" may be more accurate.) It isn't until the child is old enough to indicate otherwise that they'd know whether their gender matches their sex.

For instance, I have an almost two month old daughter at home. We gave her a "feminine" name and use female pronouns for her because that's all we have to work with at the moment. If she ever tells us otherwise then her father and I would, of course, honor her wishes and refer to her however she wants. But until that happens (if it does) we have nothing to go on other than the parts she was born with.

 

I agree with this.

I have a young niece and either a new nephew/niece on the way and for now, all we have to 'go by' is the anatomical sex for them. My niece's name and clothing match her biological sex for now, but if in the future, she expresses that she feels her biological sex does not match her gender, her wishes will of course be respected and honoured by me and the rest of the family. 

But i don't think it is inherently wrong to go with the biological sex as gender as long as you are willing to adjust that in the future if they express otherwise in the future. 

[Bad Wolf]

My grandson who is 3 is just as likely to say he's not his name. When you ask who he is he might be a favorite character or a fork lift. We're pretty sure he won't grow up to be a fork lift, but the rest is up for grabs.

[MargaretElliott]

I actually got into an argument like this the other day... a relation of mine thought it was wrong to gender a child before they had the ability to express their own gender. I mean, whenever you're guessing the gender of a child, you could always be wrong. However, for most people, the sex and gender go together, so that's the best guess a parent can go off of when they have literally nothing else to indicate gender. It's a more accurate guess than any alternative. As long as you love and support the child and honor their decisions when they can express themselves more adequately, then that's what matters. This person doesn't plan on having children (which is probably a good thing, for different reasons altogether) and didn't have a specific answer when I asked for an alternative method of naming/assigning pronouns to a child. They just said that "they're only girls/boys because SOCIETY says so." I mean, yes. Gender is a societal construct. But this is the society we live in, the society I will raise these children in, and if it can inform my opinion and helps me correctly gender my child, then hell, I'm just going to try and do right by my kid. I mean, I don't plan on going full pink or blue with my potential kids. My child won't be forced into just playing with barbies or just playing with trucks. I was raised with barbies and Legos and dinosaurs and dolls and ancient Egypt and princesses and space.... if you love your child, don't force them to conform to stereotypes, and try to understand them as best you can, then I think that's probably enough. Even if you guessed wrong in the beginning.

Of course, with the Seewalds, girls are in charge of the home (despite the fact that Jessa can't cook and her house isn't perfect) and men are the breadwinners (despite Ben not having a real job). Because choices- who needs 'em?

[Archer]

Here's my perspective on it as someone who is transgender. I can't say all other transpeople feel this way, but most I know would agree with this:

It's totally fine to name your kid something that is "gendered" and use specific pronouns based on their biological sex. As a society (American at least, that's all I can attest to), it's really hard to get by with neutral pronouns. When someone is expecting or a baby is born, the first thing everyone wants to know is "is it a boy or a girl?", and you should be able to answer easily (unless we're in intersex territory, but that's a whole other discussion). You'd be 100% correct in saying the sex is male or female. Hopefully, as someone informed, you'd know that the sex isn't necessarily congruent with the gender, and that's something you'll discover as your child grows and finds themselves.

Like has been stated above, what the appropriate thing to do is to respect your child when they tell you they feel wrong in their body, help them discover how they identify, and change names/pronouns accordingly. And making sure that your child have "boy" and "girl" toys - all children can enjoy just about any toy.

One other thing I'd say is that gender reveal parties, while obviously a ton of fun and excitement for the families, bother the crap out of me. It just sets the whole family and world up for an expectation of something that may not come to fruition. I remember my parents telling me of their struggles to conceive, and my mom saying that she'd prayed and prayed I'd be a girl because she knew she'd only have one kid and that's what she wanted. I was their perfect miracle baby girl. And that made it very hard for me to feel comfortable letting them know that I had always felt like a boy because I didn't want to disappoint her. 

[Carm_88]

I think parents need to keep an open mind and an even more open heart. You raise your child as whatever sex they are and hope that they do feel like they are in the right body. The most important thing is letting them know that you will love them no matter what they discover that they are. 

[anotherone]

18 hours ago, fluffernutter said:

Yes this! And when we know damn well they are popping out litters over the course of their lifetimes, who the hell cares what sex it is? If it's a girl, I'm sad because another girl is being born into that shit-show of a cult, and if it's a boy, I cringe because it's most likely another tiny Jim-boob in the making. 

Maybe not, if it is a boy.  If she has like 3 or 4 boys in a row then they will out of early childhood before a girl could be born and start being trained for servitude.  So the boys would be like 7 to 12 before the fifth, a girl, would be about 5 yrs old and start taking care of the 6th and 7th children.